HI

[bluesky56]

Just here to learn. I meet great lady from Ukraine but pretty sure I screwed that up by being overly suspicious for no reason really other than all the scam stuff you read all over the internet. We'll see i guess. Anyway thanks for letting me join. 

[Boethius]

Hello bluesky.


Fess up, tell her when you first met online,  you couldn't believe a woman so beautiful would be interested in you, and you know Ukraine has a lot of scams.  Then, when you started speaking with her, you were ashamed about what you thought, and said a prayer as  you were taught (last is a Ukrainian thing, though after seven decades of communism, a lot of Ukrainians won't get this point).


The only way you will learn is to ask questions.

[bluesky56]

Thank you not sure it will be that easy..giving her some time we'll see.
Very different than dealing with an American woman takes a lot of adjusting.
Hopefully this can be fixed if not life goes on and so does the search.

[BillyB]

I meet great lady from Ukraine but pretty sure I screwed that up by being overly suspicious for no reason really other than all the scam stuff you read all over the internet.

Paranoia will destroya. It's easy to tell the good women from the bad. Do lots of reading here and it'll greatly improve your chances of success.

[msmob]

Hi Bluesky56


Welcome and you've raised a really good point.

Paranoia will destroya. It's easy to tell the good women from the bad. Do lots of reading here and it'll greatly improve your chances of success.

It's clearly not.. as Bluesky just alluded to.

@Bluesky: 

1/ Could she speak English?
2/ Did you actually meet her - in real life ?

You don't have to answer my questions

[bluesky56]

msmob   ---  she worked as a russian/english translator at marriage agency for awhile. She can read English but speaking it was hard. She also recruited other girls for agency. All of which I know about from the start. That's where my trust problem stemmed from I guess even though I believe she no longer does that.   I talked to her on skype at least once a day sometimes three times a day, messaged on facebook all day. I meet her whole family except her father on skype. Plane tickets are bought for Ukraine and she knows. I may change flight to a later date but I'm going. To see her? If not hopefully meet someone else I guess. My plan is to stay there one month.

 

[Trenchcoat]

msmob   ---  she worked as a russian/english translator at marriage agency for awhile. She can read English but speaking it was hard. She also recruited other girls for agency. All of which I know about from the start. That's where my trust problem stemmed from I guess even though I believe she no longer does that.   I talked to her on skype at least once a day sometimes three times a day, messaged on facebook all day. I meet her whole family except her father on skype. Plane tickets are bought for Ukraine and she knows. I may change flight to a later date but I'm going. To see her? If not hopefully meet someone else I guess. My plan is to stay there one month.

How did you screw it up? More info always helps here as otherwise we can be in the dark and not best able to assist. I've done Ukraine and know that it can be difficult to determine sometimes, every so often there can be a little thing she does or says that can make you wonder. Always best to leave the Skype to one side I think, get on a plane and get to know the girl in person so you know all about her and not wondering about if something is a fake setup or not.

[lyndontom]

How did you screw it up? More info always helps here as otherwise we can be in the dark and not best able to assist. I've done Ukraine and know that it can be difficult to determine sometimes, every so often there can be a little thing she does or says that can make you wonder. Always best to leave the Skype to one side I think, get on a plane and get to know the girl in person so you know all about her and not wondering about if something is a fake setup or not.

More poor advice based on you wanting to justify your fear of getting on skype and your deep-rooted paranoia.

[mhr7]

Always best to leave the Skype to one side I think

Advice like this is why most don't take Trench seriously. Welcome to the forum bluesky and best of luck!

[Blighty]

... She can read English but speaking it was hard. ...

Welcome to the forum. Unlike Trenchcoat I am no Ukraine dating expert, although I am married to a very nice Ukrainian woman. Do not worry about her English accent as my wife is still improving her own English pronounciation.

The best policy in my opinion is to follow your own instincts, and to ignore the so-called experts who have failed during their own attempts. Remember she will have her own worries about you! You could be a time-waster, a keyboard/Skype romeo, or a potential sex tourist. Good luck.

[BillyB]

Plane tickets are bought for Ukraine and she knows. I may change flight to a later date but I'm going. To see her? If not hopefully meet someone else I guess. My plan is to stay there one month.

She may agree to meet you while you're in town but you have a mountain to climb to be her favorite man again. Some guys come here and believe they can turn a whore into a housewife overnight. It's hard to change anybody set in their ways overnight. Your girl works at an agency and experienced a lot of paranoid guys scared of scammers. Nobody likes to be around people who are suspicious about them. How can they go out and enjoy a date with suspicious people? Make contacts with ladies on Mamba.ru before you go. You can get a date on Mamba.ru same day while you're in town. You will have to start over building trust and a relationship with anybody new you meet. Don't give them the impression you think they are a scammer or gold digger but if you believe any woman you're dating is insincere, walk away. Confronting them about what you suspect is the beginning of the end so it's best you end it right away without wasting time.

[msmob]

BillyB

registering on mamba.ru - will more likely - these days - land the OP with a prostitute

WHY do you keep on 'recommending' guys seeking a LTR find a lass seeking monetary reward for quick gratification ... plus it's a Russian dating site.

Do you expect the OP to have a VPN to circumvent any geo-block ?

[ML]

Bluesky, if you don't want your entire month in Ukraine to be wasted . . . best go here and get cracking right now:

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=14615.0

[BillyB]

BillyB

registering on mamba.ru - will more likely - these days - land the OP with a prostitute

WHY do you keep on 'recommending' guys seeking a LTR find a lass seeking monetary reward for quick gratification ...

Most women on Mamba aren't looking to sell their bodies. You apparently haven't used the site but if you did, you probably think there's a bunch of prostitutes there if you were focusing on them.

plus it's a Russian dating site.

FSU women are located all over the world and use that site. The site can be used in many languages. Mamba didn't intend itself to be a Russian speaking only site.

[ML]

I used Mamba way back when.
Didn't make contact with any prostitutes.

[mhr7]

I've chatted with a few from mamba, never got the impression they were prostitutes either.

[Nightwish]

Most women on Mamba aren't looking to sell their bodies. You apparently haven't used the site but if you did, you probably think there's a bunch of prostitutes there if you were focusing on them.


FSU women are located all over the world and use that site. The site can be used in many languages. Mamba didn't intend itself to be a Russian speaking only site.

Then why would he use Mamba when he is in Ukraine if the ladies is located elsewhere in the world?

mamba.ru as well as many many other sites based in Russia = blocked in Ukraine, not on all networks, but most I would believe, for the main population its unreachable.

[BillyB]

Then why would he use Mamba when he is in Ukraine if the ladies is located elsewhere in the world?

He will be in Ukraine for a month. He might as well use the resources that are available to him while he's in town. While he's back home, he can use the site to find FSU women located near him.

mamba.ru as well as many many other sites based in Russia = blocked in Ukraine,

How are Ukrainians currently logged into Mamba if they are blocked? I don't have time to see if certain towns all over Ukraine are blocked but it's probably available where Bluesky is going.

[alex330]

How are Ukrainians currently logged into Mamba if they are blocked? I don't have time to see if certain towns all over Ukraine are blocked but it's probably available where Bluesky is going.

Nationwide block. This was previously discussed here.

[2tallbill]

Always best to leave the Skype to one side I think

That's horrible advice. Skype is an excellent tool for communication.

[Trenchcoat]

BillyB

registering on mamba.ru - will more likely - these days - land the OP with a prostitute

WHY do you keep on 'recommending' guys seeking a LTR find a lass seeking monetary reward for quick gratification ... plus it's a Russian dating site.

Do you expect the OP to have a VPN to circumvent any geo-block ?

Now the explanation on this is GOING to be worth the wait!

[Hammer2722]

Most women on Mamba aren't looking to sell their bodies. You apparently haven't used the site but if you did, you probably think there's a bunch of prostitutes there if you were focusing on them.





FSU women are located all over the world and use that site. The site can be used in many languages. Mamba didn't intend itself to be a Russian speaking only site.

I agree with BillyB here. I've actually dated 2 FSU women locally where I live. We met on Mamba.ru. Neither of them was a prostitute....

[Trenchcoat]

The best policy in my opinion is to follow your own instincts, and to ignore the so-called experts who have failed during their own attempts. Remember she will have her own worries about you! You could be a time-waster, a keyboard/Skype romeo, or a potential sex tourist. Good luck.

This I actually agree with, paranoia works both ways. Often on here it seems to be assumed that it is the guy that has goofed up when a relationship goes south and sometimes he has or has contributed to it either knowingly or not. I think often though both sides can unknowingly mess up a relationship as it can take a lot of foresight or discovery of how things may really be to how they look. I think often the woman can mess things up by reacting against what a guy wants in terms of moving the relationship forward, fearing the worst and thus create a stalemate of the relationship going anywhere.

[msmob]

Now the explanation on this is GOING to be worth the wait!

Then you've not been attentive, when I KEEP pointing this out to BillyB ....  I mean he'll know better, speaking the lingo and being a frequent visitor to Russia... 

[msmob]

I agree with BillyB here. I've actually dated 2 FSU women locally where I live. We met on Mamba.ru. Neither of them was a prostitute....

I'm referring to residents of the FSU and their opinion ...