Summer visit

[Pkeel1]

While I have given up on any real search for a FSU woman, a long time pen-pal is coming to visit me this summer.

She and I have talked for 1.5 to 2 years, mostly on Viber, sometimes on the phone.  She has a Visa to the US for two more years.  She has visited before, but only to the mid-west.  This will be a much different visit for her.  We are not and will not ever be a couple.  She may be very pretty, but she and I see the world in much different ways and a relationship would be horrible.

She has told me mostly what she wishes to do.  Mostly she wants to relax, maybe even simply stay at home and not do anything.  I have planned a few things for her to do.  One will be to visit my brother, he lives in Massachusetts and I thought maybe I could take her to see Plimouth Plantation and some of the origin of this country.

Another thing I will do will be to take her to the beach.  This woman is phenomenally attractive and I am very interested to see if she gets hit on at the beach.  She should be.  It would be nice if she does get some interest from men. 

Maybe not on the day of the beach trip, but definitely a shore dinner will happen as well.  Lobster, clams and corn, I am not at all sure if she has ever had any of these items.

I am very much looking forward to her visit.  I am also almost certain at some point while she is here, we will have an argument.  This used to bother me a great deal, but now I realize she is able to argue without becoming emotionally involved in it.  Something I will probably always struggle with, and a reason why I like to maintain a friendship with her.  She sure is able to help with that.

Not sure what else I might do with her.  But she picked the time to visit and I told her I would have to work some days while she is here unless she came in late spring and she picked the time when I was less available.  I know last year when she visited another friend, she complained about being forced to do things that did not interest her.

One thing that does concern me; she has expressed a willingness to clean.  I'd rather she didn't but I am not at all sure I will be able to prevent it.

[LAman]

Did you ever ask this women what she wanted to do...other than relax and stay at home? You didn't share anything.

Visit to your brother???  Did you fly this to her? Did you talk about what interests her??

You are right, I can see a few arguments in the horizon!!! ))

May I ask who paid for her tickets?

[jone]

She must be pretty sheltered if she's never had corn.  Last time I looked, I think they grew some in most FSU countries.  LOL.  Sorry.  Couldn't help but tease you a bit.  If you have no expectations from the visit, you are probably going to enjoy yourself.  Wish you the best.

As to what interests her and what doesn't, you should make an effort to pry that out of her.  One gal I had visit me I took to the LaBrea Tar Pits and George C. Page Museum in Los Angeles.  After the visit was over, she explained that she really wasn't interested in it and it was more for children.  Not the most tactful bunch, these FSU women.

[msmob]

Pkeel, Hi

You come across as a nice guy.

I think you may be trying to kid yourself as to expectations.

I am sure you will be a great host, so just remember not to buy too many expensive gifts for your pen pal.

[BdHvA]

One thing that does concern me; she has expressed a willingness to clean.  I'd rather she didn't but I am not at all sure I will be able to prevent it.

Lets start with the easy bit, Slavic women like things clean and tidy. If this is not part of your sensibilities you have an 'issue' that will be hard to resolve.

While I have given up on any real search for a FSU woman, a long time pen-pal is coming to visit me this summer.

She and I have talked for 1.5 to 2 years, mostly on Viber, sometimes on the phone.  She has a Visa to the US for two more years.  She has visited before, but only to the mid-west.  This will be a much different visit for her.  We are not and will not ever be a couple.  She may be very pretty, but she and I see the world in much different ways and a relationship would be horrible.

She has told me mostly what she wishes to do.  Mostly she wants to relax, maybe even simply stay at home and not do anything.  I have planned a few things for her to do.  One will be to visit my brother, he lives in Massachusetts and I thought maybe I could take her to see Plimouth Plantation and some of the origin of this country.

Another thing I will do will be to take her to the beach.  This woman is phenomenally attractive and I am very interested to see if she gets hit on at the beach.  She should be.  It would be nice if she does get some interest from men. 

Maybe not on the day of the beach trip, but definitely a shore dinner will happen as well.  Lobster, clams and corn, I am not at all sure if she has ever had any of these items.

I am very much looking forward to her visit.  I am also almost certain at some point while she is here, we will have an argument.  This used to bother me a great deal, but now I realize she is able to argue without becoming emotionally involved in it.  Something I will probably always struggle with, and a reason why I like to maintain a friendship with her.  She sure is able to help with that.

Not sure what else I might do with her.  But she picked the time to visit and I told her I would have to work some days while she is here unless she came in late spring and she picked the time when I was less available.  I know last year when she visited another friend, she complained about being forced to do things that did not interest her.

My guess is she is going to engage and meet other possible suitors who come closer to her goals.

Perhaps visit 'Old' Sturbridge Village in Mass.

For what it is worth with a fair degree of confidence a lobster dinner ala New England style will be a turn off. But you might hold this card as an ace.

My guess you will have a stressful time while you are together.

[krimster2]

Pkeel1,

go get a washcloth and scrub your forehead, you have the word “NOOB” written all over it!

OK, where to even begin here...

“ One will be to visit my brother, he lives in Massachusetts and I thought maybe I could take her to see Plimouth Plantation and some of the origin of this country.”

no, convenient for you, boring for her...
take her to Cape Cod, Boston HayMarket on a Friday Night, does the Philharmonic still play on some evenings next to the Charles?  or just drive a few more hrs to Manhattan...
these are just driving places, you could fly to Florida in 2 hours...

“Another thing I will do will be to take her to the beach.  This woman is phenomenally attractive and I am very interested to see if she gets hit on at the beach.  She should be.  It would be nice if she does get some interest from men. “

C’mon man, WTF is wrong with you, seriously!!!
you’re going to let a beautiful woman just sleep in your house like that, and you’re not even going to TRY and sleep with HER?  Seriously???  WTF???

bro, you need a seduction plan!!!

some tips

find her alcohol preferences and fill up the trunk of your car at the liquor store with it

same with music, movies, etc, so prime up your AV content with some Russophilia

lotion!  nothing soothes a girls tired feet after a long walk like a hot bath followed by a foot massage

your house must be spotless, spotless...

engage in some physical activities with her that involves close intimate contact
this way the barriers come down, then you pour on the alcohol...
sit next to her on the couch, touch her once or twice then move in for an innocent little kiss and take it from there...

look, if you embarrassed about this, you can PM me, but I’m really trying to help you, and not belittle your lack of experience...

[ML]

I don't know whether to label this the silliest or the saddest story I have ever read here.

[BillyB]

One thing that does concern me; she has expressed a willingness to clean.  I'd rather she didn't but I am not at all sure I will be able to prevent it.

If she wants to help you for being the host on her trip, let her do it. Be concerned if she does nothing for you. I wouldn't invite her to meet your family/brother unless you two get serious. Tell your brother you'll send a few photos of the smokinhotkova but that will be all. Showing her off to your brother and at the beach. She'll figure it out and she won't like it.

[krimster2]

Pkeel1,

here’s a “pro” tip for Russian Fox hunting...

go on craig’s list and look for an in-call massage therapist (it has to be a man)
schedule it for the 2nd night she’s there
tell her you get a weekly massage to help stay in shape, and that when you told the therapist about her, he was excited to meet a Russian and would like to give her a massage, tell her the therapist would feel bad if she said no. (you need to clue the therapist on this and give a good tip!)

she will have to slip down to her panties with a towel on top for the massage
therapist brings his own massage table, don’t worry
you need a source of music though...

if you give her alcohol before the massage, almost 100% she’ll fall asleep during the massage

depending on the mood you COULD do part of the massage, or you can come in at the end and lay a blanket over her or help her off the table into the robe...

you should also have 2 brand new terry cloth robes

here to help YOU bro!!!


 

[Boethius]

The OP just wants his guest to have a nice time. If he knows she is not the right one for him, there’s nothing wrong with hosting her visit.

[ML]

if you give her alcohol before the massage, almost 100% she’ll fall asleep during the massage

depending on the mood you COULD do part of the massage, or you can come in at the end and lay a blanket over her or help her off the table into the robe...

Sicko I would say.

[krimster2]

I'm sorry, but what is "sicko"?

[krimster2]

"The OP just wants his guest to have a nice time. If he knows she is not the right one for him, there’s nothing wrong with hosting her visit. "

they should just be friends?

so a single guy, lookin for love, will not feel any "frustration or disappointment" with a hot Russian dev sleepin the next room if there's no action between them?
if he tells me he has none of this feeling I will NOT believe him,
aand if he does feel some degree of frustration or disappointment about this then he should make a move...

[Pkeel1]

Predictable.

I posted this because I knew that everyone here would tell me all about how wrong I am and how many mistakes I am making.

Did any of you notice I have been talking to this woman for almost 2 years?  Did any of you once think that maybe I might have asked her what she might like to do when she comes to visit?  Did any of you once think that maybe I might already know what she likes for food?  Did any of you once think that maybe I know myself and her well enough to know that she will be fun to be around even if I know we would make a horrible couple?

I sincerely like this woman, she is interesting, speaks flawless English, and has asked me to visit to her.  One day I will make a trip to her town and let her show me around.  One thing I will never do is sleep with her.  She and I will never have that kind of a relationship. 

Specifics:

LAMan - I answered your questions above.
Jone - Even after proofreading I noticed that error as soon as it posted... oh well.
msmob - She is a friend and only a friend, I have had enough time to learn she and I would never click in a relationship.
BdHvA- She is almost a vegetarian, but does eat chicken and fish.  She knows Maine is known for its lobster and will give it a try.
krimster2 - I can only think your regular job is writing fanfic for porn movies.
ML - Every experience can be enjoyed with the right attitude.  It has been interesting talking and getting to know this woman and I don't expect that to change.
BillyB - I asked if she'd like to see Plimouth and she said it sounded interesting.  I grew up near there and it is always funny as hell to show people Plymouth Rock!
Boethius - Her visit last summer was not a pleasant time for her, I want very much for her to have a relaxing time and to enjoy her time here.  Maine is gorgeous and I hope she will have fun.

[Davo2]

There's nothing wrong with having female  friends. I have several that I regularly hang out with, chat to most days and I've never made a move on. One is quite comfortable walking around naked in front of me, sleeping in the same bed etc... She's stunning and gets hit on all the time, but we wouldn't make a good couple. It's not worth risking our friendship when I know anything more would fail.

[krimster2]

ML,
   plain, narrowly defined conservative sexual views are OK if you don’t really enjoy sex very much...

when I was younger, I figured out you only live once, and I wanted to experience “loving a woman” as much and as deeply as I could, so I did...

have zero regrets and neither do any of my previous GFs or my wife  (so if you’re implying some #meto moment, that’s laughable and judgemental) , so why to you are my actions wrong? just because it offends YOUR narrow definition of what’s right and wrong ... ????

ask yourself this question, is it better to be “right” by your definition of the word, or to be “wrong”, and have the kind of sexual freedom I enjoyed when I was young...

I made my choice, and in all honesty my partners always enjoyed our activities at least as much or even more than myself, that’s the essential ingredient to the whole thing!

when it comes to sex I’m a pragmatist not a moralist...

Pkeel1

you’re right man, wanting to have sex with a beautiful woman sleeping next to you, is a foul, disgusting and terrible perversion

but I freakin love it!!!

so obviously I’m not gonna be your co-pilot, ML sounds like your guy, but he thinks you're silly and stupid

but I always question guys like you, don't you think one day you'll look back with regret at what you've passed up?

curious about why she's SO INCOMPATIBLE

if you're just her airbnb, why do anything at all....

[krimster2]

run Pkeel1 run!

it’s interesting how selective you are with your info

why have you spent 2 yr on skype with someone you have no possibility of sharing a romance with?

are you lonely?

are you desirous of the POSSIBILITY of meeting someone for this purpose?
are you investing any time and effort in this direction?

what if some over-sexed handsome stud like me comes along and picks up your lady friend at the beach and they go away together and you don’t see her until the next day when she comes by to pick up her stuff?

how will that make you feel? no twinge of jealousy, regret, disappointment, none whatsoever?

if so, then I say, “Master, my people have been waiting for you for 2,000 years, please forgive me....”

[Kunstkammer]

Not sure if she’s ever had clams or corn. That’s just hilarious. Living in Russia for nearly a decade, I’ve probably eaten more clams here than I have at any other time in my life. I don’t even know what to say about corn.


I don’t care about any of that other stuff, but be aware my colleagues (all of which are Russian women BTW) are laughing hysterically at this idea. Thanks for the entertainment.

[krimster2]

milquetoast is not something you eat for breakfast

if you come to Delphi to seek the oracle
you must state your question
even if it’s sophomorical
it will be answered with discretion

[Boethius]

I think whether one eats fresh clams depends on where one lives.  Stores where I live sell fresh mussels, specialty seafood stores sell oysters, but no clams. Italian restaurants put small amounts in pasta dishes, but it’s off and on. I can buy lobster easily but it doesn’t compare to the fresh lobster I have eaten on the East coast. I can count on my fingers the number of times I have eaten fresh clams. So, it may depend on where the OP’s friend lives. Local fresh food is always tastiest.

IMHO, it is the experience of the setting you’re in, the company you are with, the conversation, etc. that’s important in dining. It’s more the overall experience than the particular food.

[Belvis]

IMHO, it is the experience of the setting you’re in, the company you are with, the conversation, etc. that’s important in dining. It’s more the overall experience than the particular food.

Certainly, Boethius knows life as it is. The food does not matter, the conversation and common atmosphere of  light flirting within friendship frame do. The best food, as I feel, which is cooked by woman's hands in home kitchen, and the actual quality of final product would be the last thing I care. Better option than clams.
Many FSU women like the see food. They like lobsters, tried oysters out of curiosity but I never meet anyone who enjoyed clams. Corn, mainly canned corn, is part of regular russian meals.

[krimster2]

if the OP really has this thing goin on about corn, then here's a little side note, Russian corn is yellow Corn, never seen a single ear of white corn there, no silver queen, etc, you could tell them it's Albino corn!

sounds like this woman has some highly "individualistic tastes", that's always been a warning sign to me
I've had better luck with Gourmand personalities than with Gourmet ones...




 

[SANDRO43]

Italian restaurants put small amounts in pasta dishes, but it’s off and on.

Clams are mandatory, and in substantial amounts, in spaghetti or linguine alle vongole :

Personally, I prefer them in bianco, i.e. without tomato sauce overwhelming their delicate flavour.

[Jumper]

I hope you both have a good visit.

Another thing I will do will be to take her to the beach. This woman is phenomenally attractive and I am very interested to see if she gets hit on at the beach.  She should be.  It would be nice if she does get some interest from men.

 

Sorry but it's a tad silly to think she needs to go to the beach,  or that any phenomenonally attractive woman doesn't get a lot of male attention anywhere period.

You can rest assured she does get some interest from men, here and at home.
Why on earth wouldn't she?

[BdHvA]

Predictable. . . . .

I sincerely like this woman, she is interesting, speaks flawless English, and has asked me to visit to her.  One day I will make a trip to her town and let her show me around.  One thing I will never do is sleep with her.  She and I will never have that kind of a relationship. 

. . . .

This reminds me of completing a puzzle when you are at random moments given some more pieces to fill in.

Good Luck !