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Author Topic: Kiev + Paris 2018 -- or as I now realize 'what not to do'  (Read 7352 times)

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Offline Maxx2

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Re: Kiev + Paris 2018 -- or as I now realize 'what not to do'
« Reply #50 on: August 01, 2018, 11:44:47 PM »

I think also with and age gap of around 13-14 years or more they may think they are due all this extra stuff/carry on as a matter of right for being with an older guy. Some girls may be different but I think a lot may think that. I wonder if such a girl might be more respectful to a younger guy, some may I wonder while others may be the same to any guy perhaps.


I believe Mrs Bean seen him a guy with endlessly deep pockets. I believe she seen herself as a young woman (She had a teenage daughter so probably 40s young) who deserved whatever she could squeeze out of older Bean.


I had a similar situation with my ex. I was 49 and she 34. What I did smart was getting out quickly. My divorce attorney who was recommended to me by an immigration attorney said to me, "You are very intelligent for getting out of this quickly". I told him, "I don't so feel intelligent getting into this mess in the first place". He said, "No, you are, do you know how many men spend money after money trying to keep it together? Almost all of them." I was out in 4 months. Bean, at least 4 years. There was fellow that used to post here that poured a similar fortune into his ex. He claimed he had a great marriage though. 

Offline Maxx2

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Re: Kiev + Paris 2018 -- or as I now realize 'what not to do'
« Reply #51 on: August 01, 2018, 11:50:27 PM »
I'm sorry you had another bad time.


Ignoring red flags seems to be becoming routine though!

You're last girl was crazy enough to make you think to hide knives before going to sleep and tattooed your name on her hand,
And you filed a k1?
 then she acted the fool with your family while on a european vacation.


This one seems mild by comparison.



That is the way it works. Get together with a really crazy woman and then when one comes along that is only a little bit crazy she seems normal in comparison. I had that experience with Irina from Ekaterinburg. She could not distinguish truth from imagination. Elvira seemed like a mountain of stability compared to her. 

Offline Maxx2

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Re: Kiev + Paris 2018 -- or as I now realize 'what not to do'
« Reply #52 on: August 02, 2018, 12:31:00 AM »
Most of the time I don't make the conclusion.


Guys like Bean, myself and the other guy I mentioned were in their productive years. We had assets accumulated. But these women would have or did drained it all away. Now that we are older and out of our productive years we sure would have liked to have at least some of that, that was drained away. When you are young you think you are going to live forever and the money will always flow. Not so. We hear often of the poor women giving up their youth for a man. The man's side is he gives up his productive years. 

Offline GenMish

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Re: Kiev + Paris 2018 -- or as I now realize 'what not to do'
« Reply #53 on: August 02, 2018, 06:20:45 AM »

 
I am now confident this is what I should have done.  There are so many women walking around and if I had not committed to a single woman sit unseen prior to the trip, I am confident I could have gone out with a different interesting, beautiful woman most nights with a just a small effort. 

On the positive side, I stayed right off of independence square, I could see the fountains from my window.  The Air BnB was very affordable ($80/night) and food and drink in the city -- even the center of center -- is much more affordable than other cities in Europe. 

I learned a little about Kiev and what it's like there -- at least enough to give it another try.  I would say that this was my least successful trip of the summer as far as my connection with the other person, mostly because of my first mistake.  I made a trip and then sort of slotted a girl into the trip, let her take over the control of the trip and didn't screen her correctly according to what I wanted.  In short I was in a hurry and really just hoped for the best instead of planning for the best.  It was 'my bad' and I'm not going to cry about it.  I still learned a lot and would say that next time I will be more careful in my screening, or not go attached to a single woman and just enjoy the city as a vacation destination not a place to meet a single woman.

We'll see what mistakes I make next time ).  I'm not a quitter but I'm beginning to wonder if I'm not cut out to be 'real man' enough for these Ukranian women.  Only time will tell I guess.  I'll give another shot or two I guess :).

That was interesting what you said about just going out there, then meeting women

Thinking out loud
What if 3 or 4 of us men picked a good city, found a really nice house, penthouse apt whatever, cook, a limo with driver and hired a translator for all of us? Not only would we share expenses, but would have the most valuable resource, each other for advice and information. All it would take is for one of us to find a virtuous lady, and that should lead us to a mine. Fine single women, have fine single women friends

I found my FSU lady 25 years ago, and it was SO MUCH EASIER then. A successful trip with the norm, not the exception. Everyone I knew came back with a young well charactered , educated lovely wife that wasn't money oriented and wanted to be a good domestic mother. Too bad all the dating agencies are scams now. In my case, the agency was really good. I recently went on Ukrainedate and ran into warning signs left and right with each woman I conversed with

Proverbs 12:4   A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.

  Proverbs 31:10   Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
« Last Edit: August 02, 2018, 06:29:37 AM by GenMish »

Offline Boethius

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Re: Kiev + Paris 2018 -- or as I now realize 'what not to do'
« Reply #54 on: August 02, 2018, 03:06:58 PM »
I found my FSU lady 25 years ago, and it was SO MUCH EASIER then.


Of course it was easier.  That was the height of the post Soviet economic collapse. 
True love begins when nothing is looked for in return.  Antoine de Saint-Exupery

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Re: Kiev + Paris 2018 -- or as I now realize 'what not to do'
« Reply #55 on: August 02, 2018, 09:17:39 PM »
That was interesting what you said about just going out there, then meeting women

Thinking out loud
What if 3 or 4 of us men picked a good city, found a really nice house, penthouse apt whatever, cook, a limo with driver and hired a translator for all of us? Not only would we share expenses, but would have the most valuable resource, each other for advice and information. All it would take is for one of us to find a virtuous lady, and that should lead us to a mine. Fine single women, have fine single women friends

I found my FSU lady 25 years ago, and it was SO MUCH EASIER then. A successful trip with the norm, not the exception. Everyone I knew came back with a young well charactered , educated lovely wife that wasn't money oriented and wanted to be a good domestic mother. Too bad all the dating agencies are scams now. In my case, the agency was really good. I recently went on Ukrainedate and ran into warning signs left and right with each woman I conversed with

Proverbs 12:4   A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.

  Proverbs 31:10   Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

I really did not have much trouble sorting out a sincere person from the agency shady biz that frankly has always been shady since its inception with actual paper letters and catalogs.

It will always come down to a one in one relationship with an individual, no matter where or how the initial contact occurs.
If guys cant read people well, and read someone quickly ,it is far more likely to land them in hot water than how they met,though that's a factor as well.

If a woman does something a man doesnt understand clearly, due to language ,cultural or whatever differences, he can have some empathy since she likely doesnt understand his every nuance,  and ask directly for clarification, or wait and see if it's a mere oddity to him versus a personality mismatch in life priorities and goals.


I'm not saying meeting the perfect match for two people is easy.It isnt.
If it was, there wouldn't be countless poems,songs, novals,movies, plays,operas on the subject.

Im saying it is relatively easy to sort out a sincere person,that at least is initially a reasonable match as far as personality,  life goals, and priorities.
Someone who would be interesting to meet,and regardless if romance blossomed, would not  behave rudely or poorly.
(Obvioulsly the man cant act boorishly either)
This doesnt mean it would work out long term or lead to marriage,thats waaaaay down the road.
but there shouldn't be  pile of horrific dates or encounters,  if a bit of due diligence in the form of just communicating and really truly listening to what she likes to talk about,how she speaks of others,whats important to her etc.
And a willingness to recognize that you arnt right for her, nor her right for you quickly and move on to communication with someone else who might be.


Most FSU people are gracious hosts ,if guys arnt encountering this ,they are fishing with the wrong bait and enticing the wrong type of fish to bite.

I think this is most often the case..

Or they are absolutely horrid at just generally reading other peoples character.









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