What are you actually looking for in a future wife?

[2tallbill]

I made a poll,

If you are married, click on what you thought were most
important. If you are not married, click on what you are
looking for.

If you are a woman then answer for what you look or looked
for in a man.

I wanted all the poll questions ticked (and more) but
I am mostly interested in what are your top three.
Angel Eyes had 9 of the 10 when I met her and 10 out
of 10 now. That means she has some extra special secret
sauce that I'm not posting about publicly.

If I left out something important please let me know I
will add it or ask the mods for help.

[BC]

Language - IMO essential.  Her English was quite good so learning a third language would be doable.  Some folks have a really hard time learning new languages so why risk it.

Main common interest - I love good food and grilling and she is an excellent cook. 20+ guests no problem at all.  It's one of life's greatest pleasures, so why do without.

Desire to have a child together. She was young enough to have another - 26 and I was 43.  My son was living with me and she brought her daughter with her.  All tubing tested and in working condition.

Of course more, but you asked for top 3

[2tallbill]

Of course more, but you asked for top 3

Angel Eyes had all the boxes ticked, but her English was really
rusty when we first met. I got both her and Smiley Girl into
classes in Russia and both of their English levels zipped up
to nearly fluent. 

In the poll I picked Pretty, Honest and Shared values
In real life I picked all of the above.

[Trenchcoat]

I went for the top two and for sex further down the list. Third on the list was tempting but in the end I went for good for sex instead as I think it can cause problems if she is not good at it in terms of it indirectly impacting the relationship negatively.

[I/O]

To be honest, I'm not sure I ever really thought about it very much...

[BillyB]

Good girl with a hot body. It's important to please both the big head and little head.

[DCCowboy71]

I think I need four!

Pretty, beautiful, cute
Honest, sincere, good character, good girl
Intelligent, educated, clever, well read, etc.
Fluent English or your language

And if I get a fifth:

Similar interests, tastes, hobbies

[2tallbill]

I think I need four!
And if I get a fifth:

I got all ten! (plus a dozen more)

This isn't about what you would settle for, it's
about what are your top priorities. I could add
another 5 characteristics and you would want
them too!

What if I added,
Incredibly loving and caring! ooohhh who wouldn't want that?

What if I added,
Has incredible humor and could find something funny in the
most mundane situations? Is there anyone who has lived through
the rollercoaster of being apart with somebody you love, an international
marriage and USCIS who wouldn't cherish that?

[DCCowboy71]

I got all ten! (plus a dozen more)

This isn't about what you would settle for, it's
about what are your top priorities. I could add
another 5 characteristics and you would want
them too!

What if I added,
Incredibly loving and caring! ooohhh who wouldn't want that?

What if I added,
Has incredible humor and could find something funny in the
most mundane situations? Is there anyone who has lived through
the rollercoaster of being apart with somebody you love, an international
marriage and USCIS who wouldn't cherish that?

WELL in that case..... sign me up for all the above!! 

[2tallbill]

To be honest, I'm not sure I ever really thought about it very much...

That's probably because if you met 7 girls, in short order
you would find one of them significantly better than the
other six. You wouldn't have to go back to some sort of
checklist.

Likewise, if I found a girl who was dishonest, then I kicked
her to the curb regardless of how freaking hot she was.

Many men get caught in the candy shop syndrome where
they don't have experience sorting through a dozen beautiful
women to figure out which is best.

These candy shop guys need to be able to identify their top priorities
or they end up flying back alone on a plane without anybody to pursue
later.

I find it useful to be able to identify with what's most important, but for
the Candy shop lads it's very beneficial.

[I/O]

That's probably because if you met 7 girls, in short order
you would find one of them significantly better

Probably......🤔

[GenMish]

Interesting topic
Wow its been 26 years since going to Russia. I had a list, but it wasnt in concrete. At the time, I was in charge of 2nd interviews for my dept, and I actually used my course training in that to choose a wife. The number 1 criterion, was a 'pattern of success.' second was chemistry, third virtue, her home life etc...I even took into schooling, grades, family and where they were in life at that point . I went with service that introduced me to ladies.

This is how applied 'pattern of success.' One girl I had incredible attraction to, but her past was a disaster. Her boyfriend was shot and killed by the mafia, and her family life was a mess. One girl showed up next to naked under her fur coat, showed her the door immediately. Good looking, but quickly disqualified for lack of virtue. Another disqualified for virtue, was one that was going to move to Dubai if she didnt find a husband soon. The very fact that was option she was considering was enough to disqualify.

Initially I told the agency the perfect girl would have all the traits of June Cleaver, but looks like Janice Rand from Star Trek. They didnt understand, so I asked for the blondes that would make good wives (cook , clean sew, raise children).  They sent me a catalogue and VHS, and I picked the girls I wanted to see before I travelled out so I was able to hit the road running when I arrived


Thanks for the topic Bill, I sure would like to relive that trip

[cameraguymn]

I probably would have intentionally lose that moral compass when the fur coat girl came - at least for the night anyway. 

Interesting topic
Wow its been 26 years since going to Russia. I had a list, but it wasnt in concrete. At the time, I was in charge of 2nd interviews for my dept, and I actually used my course training in that to choose a wife. The number 1 criterion, was a 'pattern of success.' second was chemistry, third virtue, her home life etc...I even took into schooling, grades, family and where they were in life at that point . I went with service that introduced me to ladies.

This is how applied 'pattern of success.' One girl I had incredible attraction to, but her past was a disaster. Her boyfriend was shot and killed by the mafia, and her family life was a mess. One girl showed up next to naked under her fur coat, showed her the door immediately. Good looking, but quickly disqualified for lack of virtue. Another disqualified for virtue, was one that was going to move to Dubai if she didnt find a husband soon. The very fact that was option she was considering was enough to disqualify.

Initially I told the agency the perfect girl would have all the traits of June Cleaver, but looks like Janice Rand from Star Trek. They didnt understand, so I asked for the blondes that would make good wives (cook , clean sew, raise children).  They sent me a catalogue and VHS, and I picked the girls I wanted to see before I travelled out so I was able to hit the road running when I arrived


Thanks for the topic Bill, I sure would like to relive that trip

[cameraguymn]

@2tallbill

how about nurturing, money management, social personality, ability to get along with friends and family, faithfulness, church going