A tale of two cities

[DKMM]

PROLOGUE:

After much deliberation, searching and input from guys on here I decided to make a trip to Russia, from which I just returned.

I had 10 days to make of it, and to maximize my exposure I went to Moscow then Saint Petersburg.  I went without any solid leads as my emailing campaigns weren't working to well (i tend to undersell).  I also had no agency contact because that just isn't what I wanted to do.  I guess i had more of a show up and hope something happens approach.

My reasons for choosing these places were simply because they were the most accessible cities and had the most "options" as it were.  It turns out that the schedule was pretty good.

Since this was really 2 trips in one, I will start by focusing on my 1st destination.  I chose Moscow first because I heard (correctly) that it is the heart & soul of Russia.  I had managed to keep contact with only 2 girls there before I set out.  And they weren't sounding too promising. 

I came on here and managed to get TG's advice on a guide/terp/hookup.  Her name was Alla, and she helped a lot with my last minute questions and anxieties.  She also lined up plenty of girls for me.

Also, I made the (controversially on here) decision to bring a friend.  He wasn't looking for a wife but was open to going on dates and such.  I did this mostly to have someone there to bounce my thoughts off of, and of course because journeys are more fun when shared.  It was the best move I made.

We are both in our upper 20's, never married professionals and decent looking guys.  I don't say that to toot my horn but only to give background information.  I had a couple years of Russian in college but forgot half of it.  I held a pretty high standard for girls because I can get a decent AW anyways.  Of course, after this trip what I once considered a decent AW is not all that decent.

One last thing before I get on the report:
For someone starting out, as I was just a few months ago, I have some advice.  1)  Learn as much of the language as possible.  2)  Get your tickets and go!  No amount of writing will accomplish what a week in Russia will.  3)  Read lots of this board, these guys know what they are talking about (mostly).  4)  Write girls in the area you are going, don't bother writing girls across the country.

[DKMM]

Moscow day 1

Getting to Russia itself was a breeze.  This was my 6th time to Europe so it was hardly different than going somewhere else there.  The gate was our first taste actually, because the Russians there were dressed so differently than I was used to seeing people dressed.  The flight itself was uneventful save for noticing that everybody was quite social.  Landing in Moscow for the first time is such a thrill, I was surprised how much the surrounding countryside looked like the Cincinnati airport area.

The airport is something out of an early 80's movie.  Lots of walking and finally the passport control.  I got held up there without explanation.  After 10 minutes of nervous waiting, I got waved through, again no explanation.  The very good looking customs girl tried to fool my companion "Larry" by asking if he came from New York, which we hadn't.  That was the 1st of many Russian girls asking us about New York.  I do not understand the fascination they have with this place.

We met up with our driver, who spoke zero English and rode off to our apartment.  The traffic was horrible when we got to the garden ring road, but it was rush hour afterall.  I had plans to meet one girl I had written at 6pm and it was becoming obvious I wasn't going to make it.  Guys, make your plans flexible for your 1st few hours in Russia!  Fortunately I purchased a cell phone for this trip.  Best thing I bought, I cannot imagine doing this without one.  I got the Peter the Great package from Telestial.  Anyway, I called her and she agreed to meet a half hour later.

We finally got our apartment settled and I had our driver drive me to go meet her about a mile away.  I had no chance to shave or change clothes.  So her 1st impression of me was the 30 hours no sleep or freshen up look.  I was so nervous when we pulled up to the metro stop I forgot to tell the driver to wait for us.  I just opened the door and bolted.  I recognized her immediately.  Drop dead gorgeous.  "J" was an 21 year old accomplished athlete, part time model and a host of other things.  She returned my hug and followed me to where the car used to be.  Fortunately, the traffic was so bad he was only 15 feet away so we got him.  She translated and worked it out to come back to our apartment.

We got back and I couldn't believe she acted as if nothing were wrong when we got into the dingy elevator in this dumpy entry way.  The place was probably about as bad as the worst projects in chicago.  I learned later that this is normal here.  She seemed shocked that I didn't remember how all the crazy multiple locked double doors worked, and grabbed my keys and did it all herself.

Unlike what I've read on here, she had no problem marching right into my apartment 15 minutes after meeting her for the 1st time.  She liked the place, met Larry and we exchanged gifts.  She gave me a very nice picture frame, while all I had was a tin of candies and a cd i made her.  Doh!  The 3 of us (uh can you say three wheels?) then prepped for going out....

[DKMM]

Moscow Day 1 cont'd

Off we go with this incredibly attractive girl in tow.  I'm thinking wow I bet everybody will be looking at us, except they aren't.  And as we keep going I realize its because there are so many good looking girls in this city.  We finally got to the place where this supposedly hip cafe is, and cannot find it.  We searched high and low and it was not there.  She suggests McDonalds and is leaving in 1.5 hours so I know that's about it.  The "date" ended up being my 1st Russian McDonalds experience (but not my last) and a bit more walking around.  Finally I ushered her to her train station about 2 metro stops away.

The metro really is the amazing thing here.  Its rivalled only by the one in Paris and maybe London.  Oh except this one is full of beauties.  Everywhere you go in the metro there is always someone to look at.  It was 37 hours since I slept but I knew I wasn't hallucinating, it was simply amazing.  We got to her train, hugged goodbye and that was that.  Not exactly a great start but not a bad warmup either.  As I was walking home I got a call from the other girl I had been writing.  Uh oh she wanted to meet me the next day when I already had a girl lined up with Alla.  Somewhat fortunately, the other girl cancled so it was going to work out.  Finally got some sleep.

[DKMM]

Moscow day 2

Alla met us at 10am.  She was raring to go and took us shopping at a market called Izhmalov Park.  Crazy place, I highly suggest it for buying the junk you need to take home as presents.  The girls were going to both meet us at 4pm so it gave us time to adjust some more.  Silly me, I forgot to bring my coat to Russia so I bought one there that helped me fit in with the locals (in other words, leather).

We made it over to Victory Park in time to meet the girls.  Alla had a date lined up for Larry so things were coming together nicely.  This girl also spoke English so it was goodbye to Alla.  We'd double date it.  "Yul" was my first real hopeful of the trip and again I had written to her for months ahead of time but she never seemed to interested in more than a platonic way.  In any case I recognized her right away.  Drop dead gorgeous if not a bit oddly dressed.  Her English was very limited and she told me my Russian was bad so it was an adventure trying to speak.

Park Pobedy (Victory Park) is a great place for a date.  Perfect place to stroll along.  Soon Larry's date joined us, who was not quite the best looking but very nice.  The girls seemed to hate each other, or was it just their culture?  I could tell Yul was pissed because she took the war monument stuff seriously while Larry's date "Nat" was just laughing about it.  As we walked Yul invited me over to her parents the next day.  I'm thinking this is going great!  We walked for probably 3 miles and never stopped walking.  Finally we reached a metro stop, Yul turns to me and says "I'll call you tomorrow".  its not even 7pm!  Nat doesn't want to stick around either so she bails.  They turned around so I guess it meant me and Larry were to get on the metro.  Very strange...but we were exhausted still from the 11 hour jet lag and the 8 hours of walking already. 

We sauntered back to the apartment split a 2L plastic bottle of beer that cost like 1 dollar and headed to bed.

[DKMM]

Moscow day 3

Today we met Alla at 10am again and went to the underground mall near the Kremlin.  There we were to meet her girl "T".  T was pretty good looking, actually great looking but not so much in the face if you know what I mean.  T speaks English at a 1 level on the 1-5 scale.  We tried to make this work but I have to tell you, its not for me.  I could not consider it a real conversation.  Still it was a fun experience for me. 

T went with us next to the Roerich Museum.  This has to be one of the strangest places I'd ever been.  I was trying to hit on her with my handy phrasebook and at the same time pretend to be interested in this Roerich guy's place.  It made me think if there is a L. Ron Hubbard museum some day it might be like this, enough said.

Afterwards we head back to the metro where I'm supposed to meet Yul at 2pm, and Larry was getting the "handoff" so to speak and take Alla and T out for the day.  As it turns out, T was interested in me and I in her so she left planning to return to the group later when I was done with Yul and her parents.  I did this because Yul told me we'd be done by 6pm.

Well we are on the way and who do we see go by but Yul AND Nat!  They did not see us though.  What were we to do?  It was embarrassing because nobody gave Nat the impression Larry wanted to meet her again (he didn't) and I didn't know she was coming.  So I bid Larry Alla and T adieu and made my way over to where they were, which was not where we were going to meet and still 10 minutes early. 

Yul was smoking and shocked to see me.  1st of all, she put non smoker on her profile.  I found out also that she was a year younger than on her profile, which was not a huge deal but 2 lies?  Red flag! 

Nat asked, where's Larry?  Well sorry hon but nobody told me you were coming.  And her and Yul were carrying on like they were best friends.  I could have sworn they hated each other!?  Very strange these women...

Yul originally wanted to go to the Pushkin but seemed to change her mind because it was obvious that now I was going to be on a 3 person date only I'm the only dude.  Strange reversal of events.  Actually it was neat because Nat translated a lot of the time as Yul was a 2 on the English scale.  We headed to the Christ the Saviour Cathedral but it was closed.  So we went on to the Arbat.  We walked the old one then the new one and all the way back to the Kremlin.  My feet were dying so we finally sat down for a half hour.  Then we got on the metro and said bye to Nat (after she made me promise to bring Larry next time).

Then began my journey into the unknown...

[BillyB]

I'm enjoying your well written trip report DKMM. I'm also glad you think Moscow's women are gorgeous but in my fiancee's opinion, the women could improve their looks. I also thought the average Moscovite woman was less than average in looks too compared to other FSU women. Maybe it's the big city life that allows some women to let themselves go?

Some RW list non smoker though they smoke and some say they don't drink though they'll drink beer. Drinking beer is like drinking water in the FSU. But I think the smoking on Yul's part is deceiving since she didn't smoke when initially meeting you but does it when you're not around. She's hiding her bad habits.

[happyguy]

Keep it comming DKMM.It is really interesting and written trip report.

[DKMM]

Day 3 contd

oh it gets better Billy

So we go on the metro deeper into the suburbs, easily 15 miles from the city center or more.  I realize that I'm the only American on that train and get the feeling that I'm really in for an adventure now.  She is barely able to talk to me and its funny because everybody in the car knows what's going on.  Here is this American guy being talked to by this very hot young lady (she's 18)... everybody was watching us.  We get off and we walk forever through the area named after Kruschev because he built them.  Terribly ugly run down buildings.  We walked through paths and short cuts by play grounds that looked like out of some dark moody movie.  What is up with the 100's of crappy looking playgrounds?  They look like they never were upgraded since the 60s and probably haven't been.

I insist on getting flowers for her mom (always do this btw) and we go to a flower shop on the street.  Very difficult because I didn't know what to get and she was of no help.  These girls really do expect you to make all the decisions even though you don't know what you are doing when you're there.  Eventually I settled on some strange blue flowers.  We keep going and finally get to her place.  Its actually not bad on the inside, and since her dad is pretty high up that is not surprising.

We get to her apartment and go in.  Wow, very weird to be there!  I instantly feel like her school experiment.  Its like bring an American home for the day or something.  Her little brother kind of ignored me but her mom was very gracious.  they had me sit down and I got to watch them in action in the tiny kitchen.  The table was very nicely prepped and food was everywhere.  They had me sit on one side while the 3 of them sat on the other.  

Mom busts out the champaign and they sit there and watch me.  Somehow I'm supposed to know its my job to open it!  Also, nobody touched any kind of food until I did, so I started grabbing one of everything so the rest of them could as well.  Mom starts asking me 100 questions she's always wanted to ask an American (with Yul being the translator 80% of the time and my rusty Russian the rest).  As we progress I realize she never told mom much about me, which is telling.  I can tell Yul isn't that interested but that's okay I'm not really either.  She's too young and the smoking thing just doesn't work.  Still its an experience like I've never had.

Then dad comes home.  Very cool guy, we immediately bond.  Then his friend comes over and still more neighbors drop by to check out this American Yul brought home.  His friend spoke some German which I do sort of as well.  So he proceeded to get drunk as did mom and poor Yul was annoyed.  I found myself translating the German to Russian and sometimes English.  As the vodka flowed (and it FLOWED) it got more confusing and I found myself speaking 3 languages at a time.  We went to the living room for a bunch of pictures.

Dad busts out some photos and mom starts asking how much I like their daughter.  It was very straightforward like they wanted to know if I was going to marry her.  Then her dad made some joke about being in the mafia and how much my family was worth.  I took a look out the window and realized I was trapped, but before I could panic he laughed it off.  He was such a cool guy really.  He started playing the guitar and singing folk songs for me, which everybody would join in.  They had me sing in Spanish which I also know a tiny bit of ( so I just sang the 50 or so words I knew making zero sense).  It was all a bit surreal here in Kruschevs projects singing about mas cerveza with these people I did not know and could barely talk to.

I could tell Yul wanted this to end so she could get to bed.  She was starting school the next day.  All but her wanted me to stay but I insisted I had to go.  Dad drove us back to the metro in his purple  Honda civic.  I felt like I was in high school again complete with a teenage girl... not really what I was looking for.

We stop at the metro, dad gives me a good send off and I walk to the doors with Yul.  She says goodbye and I hug and do the kiss on the cheek thing.  She responds with nothing not even a half hug or anything.  And I haven't heard from her since.

I got on and rode back, alone for the 1st time.  Its an odd feeling to be way out of the city center alone there...

[DKMM]

Moscow day 4

This day was really not all that exciting.  Alla met us again and she was pissed because I stayed at Yul's too long and missed seeing T.  Larry hung out with them that night but she was waiting for me.  Larry was not doing his job managing the girls!   

We went to get the visa's registered.  Pain in the butt.  Alla knew where to take us and we had to cough up 45 USD each.  They took our documents and gave us a temp one to carry w/our passport for a day.

We were going to meet another girl for lunch but I realized it just wasn't worth it at this point so I sent Alla on her way and went into tourist mode.  We had a lot of fun touring the Kremlin and the area around it for the day.  We were hoping to meet some girls the old fashioned way but the language barrier was too hard to overcome.  We could get attention but no connection.  Larry left his journal on a bench in a crowded area, we went back half hour later and it was still there.  That tells you something.

We went to the metro at 6pm, which was insane.  So we backed out and sat in a park to wait for the crowds to shrink.  We hung out on the corner across from the hotel national.  Cool place to watch people, girls and cars driving.  Sounds boring but its not there!

Our last night in Moscow we called Nat so Larry could at least have some luck.  I was done with the place as far as girls were concerned, although I never really got going.  Still the experiences were good and prepped me well for the next leg of my journey.  Nat met us, and was totally pushing for Larry's hand in marriage (and i'm being serious!).  I felt bad because he just wasn't interested enough yet I could tell she was a sweet girl and well raised. 

[DKMM]

Day 5 transition

Day 5 got off to a great start.  It was warm finally and the sun was out.  We went to Lenin's tomb.  I heard it was lame but found it to be another crazy Russian experience that I enjoyed.  We bummed around the area some more, got our visas and made for the train station.  Traffic was horrific and apparently you can't get a taxi without a 90 minute head start.  OK the we'll just walk it!  1.5 miles with luggage but it wasn't bad with the nice weather. 

outside of the Komsomolskaya station we ate something called Shoklovy.  It was a chicken kabob with miracle whip and a sweet & sour type of ketchup in it.  The worst thing I ate during the trip. 

We found our train easily enough, the Aurora express.  it was about 4:30pm and we got on and found our seats.  my limited russian was coming in handy throughout this day, i knew just enough to get by.  If it weren't for Larry I'd go crazy not having someone to talk to.

The train gets going and I get a call from Ana my St pete girl.  She's wondering when I'm getting in again (although she already knew).  I think she wanted to meet us there but it was going to be nearly 10pm and I felt & looked like crap.  She was too important to me to have a bad 1st impression.  Ana was the only girl I wrote before hand and also I had no backup plans whatsoever.  In a way, she was a W1V1 for that town.  My W1VM plan for Moscow didn't work too well but I did meet some nice girls and learned a ton about this experience.  And my trip was only halfway over.

The scenery was very interesting.  Much worse off than Moscow.  Imagine a cross between canadian nature with mexico infrastructure.

We finally got to SPB and I was approached by the only beggar I saw on my trip.  I shoed him away.  I couldn't find the toilets anywhere.  The signs seemed to contradict each other, something that happens a lot there.  I found that beggar guy and gave him 10 rubles to show me a bathroom...

We got outside and found the taxis.  I did the haggle thing which was hard to do in that area.  Got him down a bit though.  We jumped in his beat up taxi and sped off to our place down by the moika bridge off nevsky.  I could not believe the crazy driving, even after being in Moscow.  We sped down the street and at one intersection a truck pulled out from our left.  Our driver headed right (I think he was going to run the light) and locked the wheels.  He somehow pulled the hand brake and drifted perfectly into a right turn with the huge truck in our rearview.  Welcome to SPB!!

He got lost but then my landlord called me wondering where the heck we were so I handed him the phone and all was well.

The landlord was way cool, a british guy named Ian.  He showed us the flat, which was nicer than the one in Moscow for the same price, and invited us to have a beer with him at a place called the Red Lion.  There we met some older American guy and together they gave us advice on some cool places to see.  After that we were ready to get home and begin the rest of this trip.

[Michelangelo]

Yul was smoking and shocked to see me.  1st of all, she put non smoker on her profile.  I found out also that she was a year younger than on her profile, which was not a huge deal but 2 lies?  Red flag! 

Da!  Sad but true.  Girl's often put non-smoker on the profle but they in reality smoke.  BAD.   

Girls often put no drinking on their profile but they do drink in reality.  GOOD.   

I'm enjoying your TR, DKMM.  Excellent writing!

[DKMM]

Day 6 SPB

We started out day 6 with a phone call to Ana.  She regrets to inform me that her friend that wanted to meet Larry is out of town.  Then she agrees to meet at 6pm which is when she gets off work.  She can meet me on Nevsky because she works near there and we are staying near it.

So we head off to find the hydrofoils to Peterhof.  Much walking around near the Winter Palace and we find it.  On the way I noticed someone had their pet bear with them, on a leash with muzzle.  After a while I guess you just get used to seeing these sights.

We finally found the boats, and the trip out there was spectacular.  The water however wasn't.  Dirty filthy brown muck.  We got to Peterhof for what turned out to be a gorgeous day.  Very nice place, it would be romantic with a girl.  But instead its just me and Larry.  Inside rivaled Versailles.

At 4pm we caught a boat back.  I was getting nervous about time and rushed through getting ready forgetting my camera.  Oh well not a big deal.  It was getting close to 6 pm while I was walking down Nevsky and I still wasn't there, the road is longer than I thought it would be.  Mass throngs of people and I couldn't get around them too well.  Oh well, the cell phone bailed me out again and finally I met up with her only 5 minutes late. 

Wow is all I can say, she looked very different than in her photos.  Fortunately for me, she looked better than in her pics.  The most beautiful eye-mouth combo I've probably ever seen, not joking.  The whole package really, she was a 10.  She didn't want to eat (this is also a common theme here) so we went to get tea.  Once there she actually got a little food.  It was a weird feeling to be sitting there talking to her after talking off and on the previous 4 months.  She seriously downshifted our communication 2 months prior so I thought she wasn't interested.  Maybe she just wanted to play it safe until she met me.

It was a splendid time, we stopped off and visited Larry and went back out.  He knew he'd be spending some evenings like this but he realized this girl was my best bet so he just relaxed with my promise to take him out later.  We talked about things that old friends would since we already knew the basics about each other.

We went to a park by the Russian Museum and sat down and talked about serious matters.  She explained how she had an American girl friend and how wild and crazy she was (strangely placed piercing and such) and how that is not her mentality.  I explained, yes that's exactly why I'm here, (most) American girls are not for me!  She seemed comforted by the fact that I preferred a conservative type girl over the wild type. 

She talked about her previous marriage, an 11 month loveless affair.  Sounds like she did it out of economic necessity but won't admit it.  but then why did she marry him?  who knows, she was 20 and wanted to get out of the house.  He spent everyday at his mothers and they grew apart and split.  She still stays in touch and he still lives in SPB.  She said next time she will make sure she is in love 1st before any marriage.  Its hard for me to imagine that, as it is much less often that an AW would marry without being in love.  I explain to her how important having my own family is someday and she seemed to like everything coming out of my mouth.

As I walked her back to her car she was already complaining that I was in town only 4 days and I need to come back for 2 weeks etc.  Well how was I supposed to know we would click?   Her correspondence dropped off to once or twice a week before... maybe she realized that she likes me afterall.  She talked about perhaps she can get a week off in December and we might even be able to meet up somewhere but that she also wants me to come back to SPB.  I liked the sound of that but she refused to allow me to help pay for her ticket so we would have to go somewhere nearby and less expensive.

After that I met up with Larry and we hit some bars.  All of them were fairly lame, some dump called Kostivinny Dvor being the worst.  Fidels was kind of cool because there was a Russian reggae guy going off in freestyle.  We celebrated the fact that I was finally clicking with this wonderful girl and headed back home to bed by 1am.

[PeeWee]

It sounds as if  your first trip is working out good for you and larry. I keep thinking that your adventure will parallel that of the two brothers who journey to St. Pete in search of a wife as told in the movie "A Foreign Affair".  I have seen it twice and did enjoy it both times, especially that demise of the fish. That was classic.

Peewee

[DKMM]

Well not for Larry, his evenings are spent waiting for me...

Day 7 SPB

We started the day well hitting up the Kazan and Spilt Blood Cathedrals.  The Kazan is so so, but the Spilt Blood was amazing!  I've never seen an interior that intricate in my life...

Next up was the Russian Museum.  This was pretty interesting and insightful into the Russian mindset.  The art was all by Russians.  Once it got into the Soviet times it took a strange turn to say the least.  Communism really affected people there badly and it is reflected in the art.

My phone ran out so I got a new charge at a phone shop, which was more difficult than I expected to figure out how it was done.  Finally I was able to call Ana again and she was excited to see me after work.  She said she had school that night and could only spend a couple hours with me, then go to school and also needed to get home to help prepare for the following evening in which I'd meet her parents.

We met up again, she looked beautiful.  She took me to her favorite sushi place and I have to admit it was better than I've had in the States.  Then we moved on to another place to get more tea as she was always worried that I was cold or would get sick from the cool weather (it was maybe 5 to 10 degree C in the evenings).

After that we strolled about for hours, she seemed to forget about school.  We made our way back to her car by 10pm.  On the way we walked through a dark area so it was my chance to grab her hand.  She responded by moving her bag to the other side and clasped mine.  She did not let go for the next half hour until we got to her car.  The whole way she was really opening up about her life and I could tell the bond was growing.  Although I've heard its no big deal for a RW to hold your hand(?) I still could tell something was going on.

At the car she had me wait inside it to warm up while she ran into work for a few minutes.  Once back I gave her the hug and kiss on the cheek thing and went on my way.

I met up with Larry nearby and we hit up some place called the Money Honey.  Hilarious "rockabilly" bar with 30-40 somethings straight out of a movie with Americana everywhere and dancing from the 60s (I presume).

Next up was Magrib as Larry was restless and wanted to hit up this supposedly amazing bar, the most expensive in the city, with hot women everywhere.  It was a bore, we stayed till 1 am with nobody ever touching the dance floor and the girls were only OK.  There were some hookers, which was disgusting to me at least.  AT this point I'm not even caring because of Ana.

On the way back we were prepositioned by girls on horseback in the middle of the street to give us rides home.  Uh no thanks.  I tried the car thing I read about by sticking out my hand on the street.  The 1st car stopped right away, I negotiated 100 rubles for the ride (maybe just a mile away) and we were off.  Pretty easy, although maybe not if you don't speak any Russian...

We also managed to see a road rage sideswipe incident, a scooter gang complete with sirens that would be illegal here and a motorcycle doing easily 150mph down Nevsky with a girl on the back.

[DKMM]

Day 8 SPB

This was a shortened day for sightseeing as Ana was getting off at 3 to take me and Larry over for dinner.  Today we went to the Peter & Paul Fortress.  It was pretty good, especially for the views.  Interesting museum of torture devices.

The traffic between there and the Admiralty embankment was insane.  They need to build another bridge or something.  I also saw a 5 year old boy drinking beer his dad gave him.

We went back and got ready by 2pm.  I put on my best clothing and got my gifts for the family ready to go, excited I get to use them (not knowing for sure before the trip if I was going to meet the parents).  We went to her work on time and she was still working a bit behind the counter.  All her coworkers saw me and I felt like I was on display for all to scrutinize.  Her boss came over and chatted with her a bit and she finally could leave.  She was really nervous, telling me how her boss said I was so handsome and etc.  I could tell she was almost shaking when we got into the car so I told her don't worry I'm as nervous as she is.  It was so nice to see that this upcoming event was obviously important to her.

Larry got to see how well we interacted joking with each other and such.  She was even using sarcasm which is daring given the language thing (she is about a 3.5 on the 1-5 scale).  We went to a supermarket so she could pick up some last minute items and I got the flowers.  When she met us with her stuff, i grabbed the bags out of her hands.  Nearby was her flat in these huge soviet apartment blocks.  It was like out of a post apocalyptic movie.

We went to her apartment and mom greeted us.  She was very dressed up and the smell of good food was in the air.  The table was set in the living room very nicely.  I felt like royalty immediately.  The apartment was fairly nice by their standards but still probably would cost 500 a month rent here.

We waited for her father to come home from work so we went into her room.  She was very concerned about keeping me entertained.  She bought me 3 Cd's and put some in her player and explained the music to me.  I asked to see some photos, she left and came back with 5 albums stuffed with pictures.  It would have taken hours to see them all.  I looked through some and could tell she had a very active and good childhood, obviously close to her parents.

At last father came home, we shook hands and went to the dinner table.  It was cute because Ana and her mom were both nervous, mom was shaking a little and Ana knocked over her (empty) glass.  Eventually we all calmed down and enjoyed our first toast.  I learned that Ana rarely drinks, which is a green flag for me. 

Dinner was huge, they were trying to give us so much food.  By the 2nd course after appetizers I couldn't move so she spared the 3rd course and gave us a break before dessert.  Dad turned on the TV and gave me the remote!  Ana was fussing over me, making sure I didn't want anything else.  Then we exchanged gifts, her parents giving each of my parents a thoughtful gift.  I in turn gave Ana tea from where I live, her dad roasted almonds from where I live (see a pattern here?) and her mom some local jams.  They seemed pleased with this.

Next up was picture time.  Me and Ana sat on a chair, arm around each other and her mom took probably 50 pictures of us.  Next we traded places with everybody getting a turn but always me and Ana being in the middle.  A 100 pictures later, we have dessert.  During this they mention their Dacha and mushroom picking.  I tell them I'd love to sometime.  So they converse a bit and invite us to go there that night, stay the night and pick mushrooms the next morning.  Our flight as at 7pm next day so it sounded OK to me, although a bit unexpected!

Dessert was great, my belly about to explode and we waited for them to pack up a bit (meaning take a ton of food) and we set off in her little car, mom in the back between me and Larry, Ana up front next to dad.

The 1st stop was to our flat to pack up our bags.  We packed and handed our bags over to our landlord for safe keeping (he lives nearby).  When we got back to the car I noticed she bought me more presents!!

[DKMM]

Day 7 cont'd

We went across the Neva and there were some fountains going off there like at the Bellagio.  we stopped the car and went to the park where they were playing music next to these fountains (she called them singing fountains).  Her and I walked hand in hand again.  This was about 11pm by now.  Her mom took another 50 pictures of us next to monuments and in all sorts of places around this park.  It was a very romantic place to say the least.

Ana kept fussing about me not having enough warm layers on so I just held her close to build some warmth.  Even still she kept rubbing my hands and back to make them warm ( and I did NOT try to stop her!).  The music got going again near midnight and we walked over to the wall to watch the show.  she suggested a better view for the two of us so we snuck off.  There we held each other for a while, it was really a great moment.  She would stand behind with both her arms around me, then we switched with mine around her which she held tightly.  All the while she kept offering to get her car so we could sit in it or find another sweater for me to put on.  Sure I was cold, it was windy and about 4 C but I didn't care I just wanted to hold her.  She leaned into me and we waited for the show to end.  It ended, people started moving away and she just stayed there in my arms not moving.  Finally the entourage found us and we set off for the dacha.

The whole way was about 1.5 hours.  Her dad instructed her every move driving and instead of being like an AW and telling him to stop she took all of it in stride.  Even better was her mom from the backseat doing it too.  Hard to describe without being there.  We finally stop at some place and she says you want ice cream?  sure why not!  1:30am great time to get ice cream in the middle of the forest.  We were getting close to Finland and finally got to the dacha.  Wonderful cute place in a village.  We were ushered inside and placed next to the fire.  She put a blanket on me and offered the ottoman.  Then the women got the place ready while dad strolled around outside.  He would help now and then but the women were doing most the work.  Any offers to help were not accepted.

She finally sat in a chair next to me and got her own blanket (it was near freezing outside and not much more inside yet).  Ana realized it was nicer than mine so she took mine off and switched so I would have the better blanket.  This was getting overwhelming!  As we basked in the fire glow she snuck some looks at me with - to quote a well known Patrick Swayze movie - hungry eyes.

I of course got the nice bed (I'm getting used to this now) Larry the smaller one and Ana and her parents shared the other bed.  She said this is normal for her as when she lived with her grandparents as a girl she shared a room with her parents.  No wonder she is an only child! 

We sat down for yet more food, a shot and I made some jokes in Russian and we were all laughing and having a good time.  Near 3am we finally went to sleep.  Her dad was the loudest snorer...   

[DKMM]

Last day SPB

I woke up early around 8 not wanting to waste any more of my trip sleeping.  I got some time to think in, realizing that this girl was starting to steal my heart away.  I tried to resist but it was not going to work, she was too good.

In the morning we putzed around the dacha, took more pictures.  She took almost a half hour to get ready while the rest of us were resigned to the no shower camping look.  She came out looking as gorgeous as ever.  I brushed with my own bottled water and they said no our water is clean here!  I said what about the polar bears doing their business in it.  After a minute of translation confusion they got it and were rolling laughing!

Finally with extra coats and bellies full of borscht we set off on our mushroom hunting adventure.  Cars were lining the roads all over the forest.  They finally found an empty (relatively) area and we set out in the woods after a quick lesson.

The first thing I noticed were trenches and foxholes left over from the war.  Even some equipment laying around!  Not what I'm used to but she just shrugged it off.  Everytime she found something she would call out my name in the forest and I just loved how it sounded.  She started taking pictures of me and I of her.  We found many spots to pose and mom took even more.  I enjoyed it because that meant holding each other more, always a treat.

Still we found enough mushrooms so we could run back and cook them before taking off.  She washed her car because mom said it was dirty and I helped despite her protests.  It was fun and more pictures were taken.  Finally we sat down and ate quickly, her laughing because she knows I don't like mushrooms but I ate them anyway.  Not bad really!

We departed for the city to pick up our bags and then the airport.  Ana asked her dad about him driving so she could sit in the back with me but he said it would be bad because she is such a back seat driver (later proven to be true).  Maybe after we drop off mom he said.

We hit traffic on the way back and I'm getting nervous.  We get close to Nevsky and its a standstill.  Dad decides to have mom walk with us so we can get our bags and still make the airport with a taxi in case they can't catch up.  Ana is not happy about this but what could we do about it?  So I say goodbye while she is behind the wheel and we take off walking quickly.  No way was I going to say goodbye like that!  We get to the place and right then I see her drive by so I know we are OK.  Couple phone calls and snagging the bags and we are set again.  phew!  mom says goodbye and Ana jumps in the back seat with me.  Larry says his suitcase has to go back there too "in the middle" but she puts it in the side, Larry gets the front seat.

Dad drove and Ana started telling her dad "look out!" and such.  She curls up next to me both arms around mine and, well hard to explain but it felt great!  She leaned her head in and we cuddled for a while.  Then she fell asleep.  It was so cute, she was out like a light probably feeling relaxed and safe finally.  I took some pictures, one woke her up.  She stayed up the rest of the way, holding me more tight as we neared the airport.  They had never been to SVO2 as she never took an international flight from there.  Finally found it with 1.5 hours before our flight took off.

I heard (falsely?) that we can't take rubles out of the country so I gave mine to her, about 1000.  She refuses even though I explain we can't take it with us.  I told her to charge her phone with it so I can call her more but she refused so finally I said save it for when I return.  They leave the car there and walk us in.  Dad shakes goodbye and Ana follows us through the 1st security.  We get to the point she can't go and she turns towards me and just looks at me with those eyes.  I hold her and she says to call her when I get back no matter the time.  I gave her a kiss on the lips, which she returned after being a bit shocked (she said something in Russian like "oh my!") I don't know what it was but it sounded sexy.  Then a couple kisses on the cheek and I send her off.  Her dad was watching otherwise I would have tried for more. 

And that was it, very very sad feeling after that as I'm sure some of you have felt.  We spent the evening in Germany talking things over.  Larry says she's great and obviously into me so its up to me.  Well I agree!

[DKMM]

Epilogue

I get home and the reverse culture shock hits me.  The warmth, cleanliness, the friendly airport workers, the courteous drivers.  I get home and call her, she misses me and I her.  She passed along a joke her father told and after some talking she says "I very much look forward to your next call."

And that was Sunday, here it is Wednesday morning and I haven't heard from her.  no response to my 3 emails, not picking up the phone when I call, although she is very busy with school and work (verrrry busy) still it seems odd that I haven't got a peep.  I called her at work yesterday, she acted like everything was fine but couldn't talk, which she never can at work anyways, and tells me to call her after work.  I tried and tried.  I called her home, mom said she was gone and didn't know where she was at 10:30pm  at midnight a tired sounding mom said Ana was asleep.  And today her phone doesn't ring, like its out of charge or turned off or something.

Maybe I'm just being irrational but after an experience like that it seems odd to get the cold shoulder.  She did everything possible to make me feel wanted, she asked me 10 times to come back this winter for 2 weeks.  She made a lot of comments about living here and etc.  It all felt like a natural progression.  She followed me through security to maximize our time remaining and didn't want to let go of me.  Again, having Larry there helped as he says I'm being stupid, she was totally into me and there is likely a good reason for no contact.  But 3 days on and nothing?  She has internet at home too.  I guess I have to just wait and see, eventually I should hear something... this is not an easy thing to do.  I didn't want to fall for someone so quick but she pulled all the right moves.    

I left my heart in SPB... we'll see what happens.  I guess I will post updates here or maybe another thread...

[happyguy]

DKMM

Great story.I really enjoyed reading it.I hope it works out with you and this girl.I think your friend is right.She was into you.So just relax and give her time.You will hear from her.I am sure there will be that happy ending your both are looking for

Good Luck.

[groovlstk]

Geez, I was about to congratulate you on a successful trip, it seems you managed your expectations very well and went into this with the right attitude.

However, her behavior since you arrived home is bizarre. I'm not going to blow sunshine up your butt, but if she was really into you and had so many options to communicate with you, she would have done so...

[Michelangelo]

Geez, I was about to congratulate you on a successful trip, it seems you managed your expectations very well and went into this with the right attitude.

However, her behavior since you arrived home is bizarre. I'm not going to blow sunshine up your butt, but if she was really into you and had so many options to communicate with you, she would have done so...

Nice trip report, DKMM.

I think you need to be very direct with her now.  Tell her how you feel. Ask her about her feelings for you.  In essence, your TR tells me you have a good basis for friendship with her.  But very little romance.

Russian girls will let you know if they like you. I'd like to have seen more affection from her toward you.  Yet, you are set up nicely for a second meeting if her answers to the questions above pan out.  But do have higher expectations for more affection from her next time.

And please, leave Larry behind    Good luck!

[SANDRO43]

DKMM, she's young, maybe she needs some time to digest her unusual experience with a foreigner, talk it over with friends & family, etc.

[DKMM]

Thank you all for the responses.  I'm going to hold off one more day then send another email (suggestions for what to say?).  My 1st 2 were normal not knowing anything was off.  The last one was me asking what was wrong and why no contact?

I guess I have a hard time with this because how do I know if a RW is into me if her behavior was of someone that wasn't?  Yul's behavior is what I expected from someone not interested, not Ana's.  The last 2 days with her she constantly fretted over me, held and caressed me and bugged me about coming back to see her.  We never had time alone so I can't say anything about more affection.  If that is just being polite I can't wait to find out how they act when they are genuine!

In any case I'm ruined as far as AW go, there is no comparison.  I feel bad for AW and the poor guys that marry them.

[PeeWee]

I have experienced with several RW that when they were focused on something whatever it was that they were focused on at that moment seemed much more important than anything else at the moment.

I have this happen now. I have known Lena for 8 months or so. Sometimes I will not hear from her for a day or two, even if she has said, "I will write to you tomorrow," and then she does not. In the end the reason for her lack of communication has to do with her working late at her farm planting and then coming home only to fall asleep, etc.

It may just be the four RW that I have come to know that do this but they all seem to be able to make a priority out of something and then focus on that one thing without seeming to regard anything else. For example, me. Or in this case maybe you. If she is right now focusing on her school and that is most important to her at the moment then perhaps you are an important priority but not as important as the school. When you do hear from her she will appologize for seeming to place you on the back burner because she had to do whatever it was that she had to do. I have had it happen enough to me with a number of different RW to thing to suggest this to you as a possible answer to your question.

Peevee

[catzenmouse]

DKMN,

 Might I suggest that you hold off for a couple more days. Give her some space now as this may have hit her in ways that she is only coming to realize. You will need to learn one heck of a lot of patience over the next few years if this works out so you might as well start now. Just a thought.

Ken