RED FLAG???

[FSUrookie]

I know there are common sense rules to follow when beginning a relationship with a FSU woman, and I also know there are exceptions to the rule. After reading this board and the experiences of others with FSU women, and having had a few experiences of my own with FSU women, It is obvious that the FSU Women POT-OF-GOLD is not what was once thought (Thanks in part to some corrupt marriage/dating agencies and scamming FSU women, and fantasy-unrealistic thinking on the part of American men). Yes, I can see there are many horror stories and some success stories. In most cases they all seem short term. It would be interesting to see how some of these AM-FSU marriages turn out in the long run.
Oh, one obvious myth: The age difference sell by agencies seems to be more hype than truth. Yes, age difference does exist, and more so than in the USA, however, it is not as great as many thought.
Anyway this is my question; Is the following always a RED FLAG, or does the following type of FSU woman really exist?
Profile Excerpt (from a legit agency): (By the way, she's pretty nice looking too, though not an obvious 10, but perhaps an 8 on the 1-10 scale.)
Age: 24
Occupation: classic vocal, theacher of music
Education: higher
Religion: Christianity
Marital Status: never been married
Kids: no kids
Languages spoken: basic English
My personality traits are: serious, honest, sensitive, gentle, romantic, responsible
I like these kinds of music: classical
I usually read: classics, poetry
I like to go out to/and: theater, exhibitions, museums, concerts
My favorite cuisine: French
I like these physical activities: swimming, figure-skating
More about me: I’m 24 y.o., Russian. I’m tenderness, sincere, beautiful and sensitive woman without bad habits. I’m a musician: graduated from Russian Academy of Music named Gnesin’s, play the piano and sing. I prefer classical music, especially Mozart, Verdi, Puccini, Tchaikovsky, Rachmaninoff. My whole life is music.
But I’m so lonely. I look for the romantic soul, such as me, who might change my life. 
Age group of a partner: His age and appearance is not very important for me.
My perception of an ideal relationship: I hope to meet warm-hearted, understanding, faithful and sincere man, who has serious intentions with me. His age and appearance is not very important for me. I hope to create a happy family with children.

I see this type of profile more often these days. To me, when a woman says that age and appearance does not matter, this seems like an obvious red flag? What do you guys think? Any feedback is appreciated. Thanks.

[BC]

Music is her life + age and appearance of partner not important = ???  If the age/appearance statement was more than just a tickbox on her application I'd worry.

OTOH

Are you a musician, or also deeply interested/knowledgeable in classical music FSU?

Have room for a Steinway in your living room and time for auditions all over the country?

Live near a big cultural center where she can express herself?

Just thoughts...

[jb]

LOL, BC,

Talk about nailing things down...

Rookie,

There's fantasy and then there's real life.  Do you feel you have the capability to make a woman like that happy?  I don't see so many red flags in the profile you pasted up, but I do see a woman who is going to be very hard to please over time.  As BC pointed out, do you have room in your house for the Steinway?  Are you totally into classical music yourself?  It's my experience that longhairs gets kinda boring over time if it's a steady diet and I'm in a different mood for some funky stuff.

If you feel that a 24 y.o. who is completely into classical music and desires to make it her life's career is a good match for you, then write to her.  OTOH, if you live in a not so cultural center of the country and are more into Charlie Daniels or *gasp*,,, rap, I suggest you give her a miss.  When you get comfortable with the idea that Goliath kicks Davids ass 99 times out 100 in real life, you will have approached something called wisdom, this certainly applies to picking out a woman.  Don't go around expecting miracles to happen.

[Turboguy]

I don't see it as a red flag.  If she was 24 and said she wanted to meet someone between 65-80 I would see it as a red flag. 

There really are a few gals who have had some bad experiences with fidelity with the younger guys and are more open on age.  Just remember, if you get rid of the big screen tv and don't mind watching the games on a portable tv in the basement to the background sound of Chopin on the piano you will have a great gal.

I shouln't talk.  On my TR I talked a lot about one of the two gals that are my top picks from the tour.  The one I called the nose.  The other top pick I did not talk about is a concert pianist, a little older than your gal actually.  It is amazing how much a good smile a a great personality can overcome a lifelong lack of appreciation for piano music but I do have room for a steinway or two in my LR.

[viking]

If I read this correctly, she is not saying that age and appearance does not matter but only it is not as important as other traits. It seems she is leaving herself some room for responses from men who are in different age brackets. I would not be suprised if she does have some kind of upper limit in age and only she will determine what that might be. Maybe if you are a concert pianist who plays in Lincoln center all the time, she might go a little older. I do not think this is a red flag.

[Sohkay]

Rookie,
There's only one way to know for sure.
Write to her. See if she even wants to communicate with you. If communication with her is good, then go visit her. You should then have a much better idea of how important age and appearance are to her.

Good luck.

[Gator]

Rookie,

I see no red flags.  The closest is her statement that she is "so lonely" - I do not think a 24-yo is lonely, especially one grading 8 out of 10.  This does not qualify as a pink or yellow flag.

A Red Flag usually applies to whether the woman has ulterior motives.  These come out in correspondence, telephone calls, and time together – not in profiles.

Another category of Red Flags is whether the two of you are compatible (personality, goals, values, interests).  BC, JB and others covered some of those.  

Thanks for all the information about yourself, how long the two of you have been corresponding, what was said, etc.  With so much information we confidently can make an assessment about your compatibility.  Obviously I am pulling your leg.  However, even with more information these are difficult calls.  

So what I say has little credence.  I say you are probably not compatible.  

-  She is a musician, and many musicians are driven by their emotions, making them as capricious as the winds.  

-  She proudly claims to be romantic (as expected with artists)

-  She is young, and a 24-yo will change (as women say, “she will continue to grow”).  What she says she wants today will change, perhaps more than once.

OTOH, I guess you are older and the “cautious type”.  I guess you are not fond of wild mood swings and life changes.  Nor is the "cautious type" a good fit with romantics.  

BOTTOM LINE.  Rookie, if you like this woman, write her and call her.  Do not talk about the weather and puppy dogs.  Discuss the issues raised in this thread.  Discuss them directly and early. Have fun!

[Darth Vader]

It's true that FSU girls will marry older men (up to a reasonable age difference).  So to me that's not a red flag.

Of more importance is her personality and interests and if you or she would be bored together.

So for now, you have a green flag to "explore" this girl 

[Shadow]

I second BC and jb here.

The profile is one big red flag.
- Religion: Christianity... beware of anyone in the FSU that is Christian (I do not mean Orthodox)
- 24 y.o. wants to change her life after studies ?

Speaks basic English and likes French cuisine.
Has expensive taste written all over her profile.

I would say handle with extreme care. Also it seems you have not really learned the lessons you talk about.

[Sohkay]

Shadow,

You wrote, "- Religion: Christianity... beware of anyone in the FSU that is Christian (I do not mean Orthodox)"

Could you elaborate please.

[jb]

I also wondered about Shadows remarks.

Orthodox Catholic is one of the oldest of all Christian religions.  Right up there with Roman Catholic.  In fact, they were the same church up until the 11th century, IIRC.

[Shadow]

My fiancee has first-hand knowledge of the Christian movement in the FSU, and those who choose to participate in it.

As such I do not mean the Orthodox, which is a long-lasting and genuine religious community that survived the Soviet-Union, but those who call themselves Christians by movements that came in to the FSU from the USA.

Usually religous FSU women will not name their religion as 'Christian', unless they have had the opportunity to compare religions in-depth.

[Sohkay]

Shadow,
What has your fiancee' observed about this imported American Christian movement in the FSU?
I think I understand what she's talking about, and perhaps would agree with her, if I'm reading into this correctly.
Thanks.
Sohkay

[Shadow]

Sokhay,
Discussions about religion are best left to other boards.
To give a small insight she has observed sect-like behavior, where people were robbed of all their possessions. Also she has observed that those who were converting to this did so for two major reasons.
One of them was preparing to leave the country.

[Gator]

Dear Me!

And shadow I thought initially that you were being facetious.  Hopefully you are.

Do not attach any significance to "Christianity."  One woman I know very well checked the box "Christian" on her profile.  She neither practices Orthodox Christianity (other than burn a candle twice a year) nor any sect of "holy rollers".

[Shadow]

Gator, as usual in profiles it is just one thing to ask about. And in case of religion it might be better to ask without explaining your view on that matter first. 

[jb]

Let me try to get back on point here...

The OP here speaks of red flags associated with a nice looking 24 y.o. musician, yet does not tell us of his age or profession or what commonality he may, or may not have, with the young woman.  Without that amplifying info how can we discuss a red flag?  Do we cheer on a carpenter or a plumber tradesman of 45 years of age in this case?  IMHO, we should not.  We should cheerlead if the Rookie is maybe a 40 y.o. arts teacher at a mid-sized university or better, but we know nothing of the sort so far.

Religion aside, (it's a small thing here), I believe it's better to concentrate on other, more important things.

I had a glance at FSURookie's profile here and he doesn't share much, not even the State he lives in.  Getting cozy with a concert quality musician is one thing if you live in New York or LA, but may not be a good thing if you live in Podunk, Iowa.

I just see another irrational debate in the making unless we have more info.

[Albert]

"His age and appearance is not very important for me."

This is not a red flag.  For a 24 y.o. woman, she is probably wanting someone 25-30 and thinks her statement covers it.  She just doesn't want readers to think she requires someone under age 26.

'Age not very important' is not a red flag because it means something entirely different to her than you might be thinking.

Red flags only occur when they state actual ages.

i.e. A red flag is when a 24 y.o. says she will accept a man up to age 60.

[FSUrookie]

Thanks for some good info guys. I am 41 years old, decent looking, in good shape, and have dated a few FSU women (in their 20's) previously. My tastes are wide open, so her musical background is not a major issue, however I posted most of her info to give you a rough idea. I am actually pursuing one other woman and this lady was to be my "Plan B". Seems as if most everyone on here has a Plan B, but to this day I have mixed emotions on that, because it is so hard to effectively do this. I realize that the guy who may go on a tour may laugh at that, but anyway....My comment is about the fact that she is not concerned with age and appearance. Ok, I am MOST concerned with the appearance part as a RED FLAG. I mean come on, I find the general rule is, If you can score a woman who is a 7 here, you can probably score a woman who is an 8 there (only an example). But really, how many men or women can HONESTLY say that appearance is NOT important? Especially a man or a woman who is in the 7 - 10 ranking category. I'm not trying to be shallow, because what is on the inside of a woman's heart is just =as important to me, though I know you could hollow out a woman's brains and most guys would still marry such a woman for her looks and body features. So, be honest guys...... I think the appearance issue is definitely a RED FLAG, but I do repsect the opinions of others on here too. As for age, I am finding that more than 7 years difference is the exception, not the rule, though yes, it does happen. I have also learned first hand that FSU women under 23 seem to change their minds often, so many times there is nothing wrong with the guy, but the lady can not make up her mind what she wants to do with her life or who or where (what country) she wants to do it with or in. Oh, by the way, I am an Ex-CC agency dater, so I have some war wounds too....

[Gator]

Rookie,

As I said earlier, women change, especially the younger ones.  You recognize that women "under 23" change, so why would a 24-yo differ?

About looks.  If a woman can not feel some physical attraction for a man, it is not love and the relationship will not endure.   Her attraction to you does not have to equal what you feel for her, but there needs to be some passion.  Her eyes and body language will reveal whether she feels some physical attraction.  Body language does not lie.

I strongly advise you not to visit only one.

[Leslie]

One thing really caught my eye on this -

"I’m a musician: graduated from Russian Academy of Music named Gnesin’s, play the piano and sing."

If this is true and she graduated from this place

http://www.gnesin-academy.ru/index-en.php

Then she is an EXCEPTIONALLY talented musician.  Think top 0.01% !!

I am married to a classical musician (Kiev Conservatory). 

Believe me - exceptionally talented musician and emotional gelignite are very common partners.

In FSU it is VERY common for a young professional musician to be a rich older guy's mistress.  A foreign boyfriend is but a small step from there.

Dating a girl like this is easy.  Spend your money!  Winning her heart and building a long term relationship is an entirely different matter.  A woman like this has a lot of choices - unlike a poverty stricken but pretty devushka (shop girl).  You have to ask yourself if you have what it takes.  Or are you going to be just a sponsor?

[Shadow]

Fsurookie,

1. Appearance is less important to women than it is to men. Better looking than a monkey is good enough. Although some prefer the monkey.

2. You say that more than 7 years is the exception. Yet you are 41 who having chased under 23 year old now is looking for the 'mature' 24 year old ? How about adding 10 years to your preferred age group ?

3. You are pursuing one other woman. Does that mean you have plans to visit both ? Did you call any of them ? Until you meet in person you have nothing more than a pen-pal.

[PeeWee]

I know there are common sense rules to follow when beginning a relationship with a FSU woman, and I also know there are exceptions to the rule. After reading this board and the experiences of others with FSU women, and having had a few experiences of my own with FSU women, It is obvious that the FSU Women POT-OF-GOLD is not what was once thought (Thanks in part to some corrupt marriage/dating agencies and scamming FSU women, and fantasy-unrealistic thinking on the part of American men). Yes, I can see there are many horror stories and some success stories. In most cases they all seem short term. It would be interesting to see how some of these AM-FSU marriages turn out in the long run.
Oh, one obvious myth: The age difference sell by agencies seems to be more hype than truth. Yes, age difference does exist, and more so than in the USA, however, it is not as great as many thought.
Anyway this is my question; Is the following always a RED FLAG, or does the following type of FSU woman really exist?
Profile Excerpt (from a legit agency): (By the way, she's pretty nice looking too, though not an obvious 10, but perhaps an 8 on the 1-10 scale.)
Age: 24
Occupation: classic vocal, theacher of music
Education: higher
Religion: Christianity
Marital Status: never been married
Kids: no kids
Languages spoken: basic English
My personality traits are: serious, honest, sensitive, gentle, romantic, responsible
I like these kinds of music: classical
I usually read: classics, poetry
I like to go out to/and: theater, exhibitions, museums, concerts
My favorite cuisine: French
I like these physical activities: swimming, figure-skating
More about me: I’m 24 y.o., Russian. I’m tenderness, sincere, beautiful and sensitive woman without bad habits. I’m a musician: graduated from Russian Academy of Music named Gnesin’s, play the piano and sing. I prefer classical music, especially Mozart, Verdi, Puccini, Tchaikovsky, Rachmaninoff. My whole life is music.
But I’m so lonely. I look for the romantic soul, such as me, who might change my life. 
Age group of a partner: His age and appearance is not very important for me.
My perception of an ideal relationship: I hope to meet warm-hearted, understanding, faithful and sincere man, who has serious intentions with me. His age and appearance is not very important for me. I hope to create a happy family with children.

I see this type of profile more often these days. To me, when a woman says that age and appearance does not matter, this seems like an obvious red flag? What do you guys think? Any feedback is appreciated. Thanks.

So as to remain unbiased in my thinking I went straight from your question to my response.

To me, the profile looks perfectly normal. One question that came to my mind is that since she does not speak English very well then someone did write her profile for her. No big deal, I suppose. Other than that her profile reads with the same optomism as to many profiles that I read, both on RW agency and the like of Match Doctor. Give it a go because those women are out there. The nuggets lurking within the piles of mud.

Peevee

[PeeWee]

Let me try to get back on point here...

The OP here speaks of red flags associated with a nice looking 24 y.o. musician, yet does not tell us of his age or profession or what commonality he may, or may not have, with the young woman.  Without that amplifying info how can we discuss a red flag?  Do we cheer on a carpenter or a plumber tradesman of 45 years of age in this case?  IMHO, we should not.  We should cheerlead if the Rookie is maybe a 40 y.o. arts teacher at a mid-sized university or better, but we know nothing of the sort so far.

Religion aside, (it's a small thing here), I believe it's better to concentrate on other, more important things.

I had a glance at FSURookie's profile here and he doesn't share much, not even the State he lives in.  Getting cozy with a concert quality musician is one thing if you live in New York or LA, but may not be a good thing if you live in Podunk, Iowa.

I just see another irrational debate in the making unless we have more info.

yep...good point.

Peevee

[FSUrookie]

Thanks again. Great replies. By the way, I am a computer teacher / technology specialist. For the record, the 25 - 35 age (preferred) category is very elusive, and pickings are VERY limited, since this is the age category that many of the good catches are married, or have been divorced and with children. So, I understand this and feel that the 23 - 25 age group offers the best choices. Also, I commonly date teachers in their 20's here, because I look younger and am in good shape, and can get away with it, ha! Seriously, I understand that the wider the age gap, the more potential issues, but as we have seen here, there are many exceptions to the rule. Anyway, I have not yet wrote this second woman. My whole point began asking for feedback on the age and appearance issues.
Oh, and back to my original post; Are there any examples on the successes and failures of marriages with FSU women (with age differences) over the long haul? Thanks again for all feedback.