On friday 17 november I will marry my girl.....

[smartcat]

Thor, congratulations from the bottom of my heart! You are a wonderful and warm man and you deserve the best family happiness and joy, I am so glad for you! 
Bruno gave you good ideas about how the wedding goes in Ukraine. All-day job. There are a lot of rituals.

My comments and adds to Bruno's article , may I?

1) "The bridegroom comes to his bride in a car decorated with flowers, ribbons and balloons. Sometimes, a doll dressed like a bride is placed on the car's hood. When the car (or cars) comes up to the house of the bride, they start to honk.

It means that the bridegroom and his relatives are ready to take the bride, her parents and friends to the church and city hall, to get married and register their marriage. When the bridegroom and bride walk out of the bride's house, the bride's mother throws seeds (symbol of wellbeing) onto their heads, as well as roseleaves (symbol of prosperity and health) and coins (symbol of financial stability in a family)."

When you come to the house where the bride lives often you can face to the neighbours or her siblings crossing the entrance with a rope or a ribbon. They will ask a "ransom" from you for a bride, smiling and congratulating you. Make sure that you or your bestman have enough to give to them. Traditionally they say " malo! " (not enough) and laugh. So better start with 20 hrivnas bill, then after "malo!" add 20 more and 20 or 50 bill more. They usually ask three times.

I must add that often it goes that a groom brings a wedding small bouket of white roses to a bride and handles it to her in her house. It's good to pre-order it in a flower store, they are often specially desined. Not bad idea is to bring a bigger ordinary rose boucket for her mom and maybe one more for grandmom, if she is present. It's not obligation although, some people do, some not.

When you leave the house and get to the cars, very likely the relatives will care that nobody would ever cross your way and that you hold hands until you get to the car. A ritual for "good luck".

2) "God's blessing is the most serious blessing for the new family. There are many prejudices connected with the ceremony in church. They say that if the bride's dress catches the fire from a candle, it means that the marriage is doomed. So it is quite understandable that the bride's mother is always very careful in church, and does her best to prevent any of such things."

Orthodoxes make a cross from right shoulder to left shoulder. About prejudices. As in church so in City Hall they believe that who was first to step on the towels set on the floor will be ruling a family. So girls try to jump on ASAP Very bad sign if the ring is dropped to the floor, keep it tight!

The part of tradition is while parents bless a new-married couple with a big bread and salt pot on. Usually it takes place in a restaurant where the couple goes after City Hall, church, and then takes a ride around the city taking photos in nice sites. You should take off a piece of bread, put it to the salt and feed your wife and she will feed you. Of course, say thanks to parents.

3) About the feast. The pair of boots to mom-in law said in the article is not obligation. Can be a local tradition, but it's funny. The bread taken apart- I have never seen it at any wedding. Must be a local wedding joke too.

4) More local national traditions taking place on the feast. Kept or not kept. Taking the veil off the bride and putting the scarf on. Usually is done by mom or mom-in-law. Symbolizes that maid life is over and a girl is turning into a woman. Quite touchy, women can cry. So it's questionable, often brides try to avoid the ceremony, agreeing with master of the ceremony not announce this tradition. But all depends.

5) In some places, usually countryside they announce the second day of wedding. The second feast next day. It's more relaxing, family style day time party for most of the closest friends and relatives. You are dressed more casual but still elegant.
Some of the people redress to "gypsies", actor-like make-up is put on their faces. Usually women redress into men and men into women, make fun dancing, can get out the street with bottle of vodka, asking passers-by to drink for newmarried couple, or doing something alike.

Uff, let you and Rena survive in, Thor!!! If I remember anything else, I 'll write more.

[docetae]

Congratulations ! And thank you to refer me Slava as translator in Karkhov ... I hope to post the same message than you next year ....

[Bruno]

My comments and adds to Bruno's article , may I?

Thank you... but the article is not from me... i have copy it from somewhere on internet long time ago... so, i have no merit and the article is not from me... i am only sory that i have not more the link to the source...

Ok, not more true, google have allow me to find the original source... now, it is not more the "Bruno's article" but the "Bruno's link"...
http://www.videobabylon.ca/ukrainian_wedding_traditions.html

PS : I don't know the agency who have post hese aritcle... in no way i recommend it or the reverse... simply the article was enough good and realistic for be posted...

[Jumper]

Thor -
best wishes to you and Ren!!


Bruno's posted link  and
especially smartcats elaboration on it -
cover what happened at our Ukrainian wedding very well..
the ransom at her fathers house was fun..
there was a virtual gauntlet to go thru ! 
 one person may ask for candy or what ever you have brought with you, another for something else. .
another may ask you to answer questions about the bride or your soon to be mother in law.. .. or ask you to dance or sing ..
as you get closer to the house or the room she is awaiting -
 the tasks or ransom goes up a bit.. but its all in good fun.

There is the  salt bread ..
and stepping on the wedding cloth - which we still have of course..
(who steps on it first is rumored to run the household)
 there were some other traditions as well..
going around the city to variuos parks for photos,,
walking around the perimeter of a fountain..
also leaving flowerrs at a memorial..
each city likely has a few of its own traditions!

It was great!

have fun! 

[Thor]

Hi guys.

Now I am in Kharkov again, so if any of you guys are here in Kharkov or need any help, please feel free to give me a call. My cell phone number are +380 9794 66408.

[Freebird]

Hi Thor -

I'm the guy who just got married in Kharkov in September.  Nothing special, just paperwork at the local zags - maybe a little party afterwards.  Before I left Ukraine, I started the DCF process and got my I-130 approved.  And just recently, I emailed my KEV-1 and DS-230 Part I to the consulate.  I'm waiting for an interview date and if all goes well, I'll have my bride back in Colorado in January.  Kharkov is Lilia's home town and she owns a condo there, so I'm sure I'll be spending much time there in the future.  I owe my success to Jack Bragg who showed me the ropes, and to Dan who gave me loads of personal advice.  Anyway, not sure what I can do for you, but I'm willing to share my process experiences with anyone.

Jim

[BillyB]

Congrats Freebird,

The DCF sounds encouraging since your wife might be with you in January!

[Thor]

Hi Thor -

I'm the guy who just got married in Kharkov in September.  Nothing special, just paperwork at the local zags - maybe a little party afterwards.  Before I left Ukraine, I started the DCF process and got my I-130 approved.  And just recently, I emailed my KEV-1 and DS-230 Part I to the consulate.  I'm waiting for an interview date and if all goes well, I'll have my bride back in Colorado in January.  Kharkov is Lilia's home town and she owns a condo there, so I'm sure I'll be spending much time there in the future.  I owe my success to Jack Bragg who showed me the ropes, and to Dan who gave me loads of personal advice.  Anyway, not sure what I can do for you, but I'm willing to share my process experiences with anyone.

Jim

Hi Jim and congratulations with your wedding!! I also used Jack Bragg and he was very helpfull and he was in many ways my teacher/master when it comes to dating Ukrainian girls. I went on his spring trip 2005 and I visited 3 citys, I did not meet my girl then, but I learned a lot.  Kharkov is by the way a very good city to find good women. This because many girls from Villages study in Kharkov. This girls are usualy not spoiled. They are mostly down to earth girls. Our wedding will be rather big. We will marry in marriage palace in Sumskaya. After this we will have party at a restaurang. There will be around 35 guests there. I asked my girl if we maybe should have a very littel wedding, only marriage palace. But she said NJET, she told me that she should marry only once in life and this should be a very special day for her...what could I say???In the last week we have done a lot of work. We have orded cake, bougth rings and many more!!!

[Freebird]

Congrats Freebird,

The DCF sounds encouraging since your wife might be with you in January!

Billy, the DCF process was the only way for me since I didn't want to waste a bunch of time getting Lilia to Colorado.  So far, the process hasn't been difficult.  The forms are easy to fill out; the difficult part is gathering the information - in English.

[Freebird]

Hi Jim and congratulations with your wedding!! I also used Jack Bragg and he was very helpfull and he was in many ways my teacher/master when it comes to dating Ukrainian girls. I went on his spring trip 2005 and I visited 3 citys, I did not meet my girl then, but I learned a lot.  Kharkov is by the way a very good city to find good women. This because many girls from Villages study in Kharkov. This girls are usualy not spoiled. They are mostly down to earth girls. Our wedding will be rather big. We will marry in marriage palace in Sumskaya. After this we will have party at a restaurang. There will be around 35 guests there. I asked my girl if we maybe should have a very littel wedding, only marriage palace. But she said NJET, she told me that she should marry only once in life and this should be a very special day for her...what could I say???In the last week we have done a lot of work. We have orded cake, bougth rings and many more!!!

Thor, your wedding is coming up in less than one week, so I know you're a busy man.  Congratulations!!  I agree with your comments about Kharkov women - a friend of mine is also marrying a Kharkov girl in a few weeks from now.  If you have a chance, you might want to try the Pushka resturant on Pushkinskaya (my spelling is probably wrong).  It's a European resturant - a little pricey but good.  I hope you have good weather for your wedding; I've been looking at the weather there and it's been a bit cold in the past couple of weeks.  I'm planning to spend New Years in either Kiev or Kharkov, so it will probably be very cold then.  Good luck with the wedding Thor, you have a beautiful fiancee and I wish both of you a big success.

[Thor]

Thank you very much Jim. Yes Kharkov is a great city to find sincere girls. Many student girls from small villages sourounding Kharkov comes to Kharkov to study. Some of these girls are very much looking for forreign man. The men in the small villages are sometimes lazy, drinks to much and also sometimes beats the women. There are a HUGE difference between a big city like Kharkov and a small Village. Thanks for your advise regarding restaurang Pushka, I will se if I have time to go to this restaurant this week, maybe with some of my guest from Norway. Next week will Ren and me go to Thailand for our honey moon:)). It is a present from Renas sister and her husband.

Yes it has been cold the last week, but I am Nordic man from Norway so for me this is normal and I like the cold weather:)). But new year in Kiev or Kharkov can be a very experience, but then you have your wife to keep you warm,:)).

[Gator]

Thor, 

Great story, beautiful fiancee.  You are proud and justifiably so.  Thanks for sharing.

I read that the UN has ranked Norway the best place to live for the 6th consecutive year.

Congratulations for both successes.

[Thor]

Hi Gator,

Thank you very much!! I am getting ready for my battler party here in Kharkov tonigth. It is a international battler party, 2 from Norway, 2 form England, 1 from Ukraine and 1 from Australia. I believe that it will be very funny.

Yes Norway has been rated number 1 by UN the last 6 years. I guess it is because of our social systems....

[wiz]

Thor

All my best wishes for Friday and wish you all the happiness in the world.

RGDS
Yannis