clever?

[fred_blogg]

hi new to here.basically feeling really stupid.i been scammed a coupled times luckily never parted with money.over the last 2 months i have been writing to a russian girl (28yrs old) i'm 60yrs age is of no consequence .her pictures were ordinary,taken on a back drop of the ocean .she wasnt a model type ,very pretty though,her hair wasnt dyed or tidy even,just very plain.her clothes were to say the least shabby giving impression of living down to earth she sounded different no love letters,no money asked for so i thought ..finally a girl who cares.but now she cant talk to me as often as her internet charges have risen.her parents are elderly and cant help her.she draws a minimum wage,goes to cinema very very rarely.Her virginity seems to be her pride she is proud to be a virgin and so she should.she just wants to be loved.
am i being a silly old man?

[BC]

Welcome Fred,

Yep... quite silly IMHO.

Did she find you or did you find her.. and how?

[jb]

Silliness is relative, in this case, other than the virginity question, less silly than T/G.

Welcome Fred,  may I ask why you'd choose to become involved with a 28 y.o.?  Why, for example, you wouldn't like a nice 45-50 y.o., a woman with whom you might share some commonality?  Unless you've been living in a cave for the past 30 years I doubt you'd have much to talk about with this virgin child.

but now she cant talk to me as often as her internet charges have risen.her parents are elderly and cant help her.she draws a minimum wage,goes to cinema very very rarely.

Frankly, I'd say you are about to be scammed again.

[BillyB]

In this business, when a woman says she's a virgin, most likely she's using that ploy to get the attention of and catch a lot of men.

[Stirlitz]

a russian girl (28yrs old)… Her virginity seems to be her pride she is proud to be a virgin

[Turboguy]

Hi Fred,

First off, I think I am not the only one who things a 28 year old virgin is not likely.  I am not saying impossible, just not likely.

Second the not having the money part is often something you will hear from a scammer. 

Third the down home nature of her photos and the fact she is not a beauty queen does not mean much.   The virgin claim and the age difference gives her enough desirability that if she is looking to scam someone she can find prospects.

Does the age difference alone mean she is a scammer.   No, there are lots of FSU women who will have an interest in older men and are not scammers.   Still unless you find something really special between the two of you the age difference can add some challenges to the relationship or so most say.  I have personally not found that to be true, but that is just my two cents worth and I don't want to start something by saying that.

My thoughts.   Go someplace that lists scammers such as www.russiantearoom.net and see if she is listed.  Google some of her phrases in her letters if you want.  If she comes up clean, write but don't send money.  If she does show up as a scammer, spend your time more productively.

If you met her through a site like Match.com or Yahoo, I would say she is a scammer.  They don't always ask for money quickly.  Some try to build a relationship then get you to pay to see the relationship continue.

[Bruno]

First off, I think I am not the only one who things a 28 year old virgin is not likely.  I am not saying impossible, just not likely.

By my past experience, i can certainly say that it is possible !

[jb]

Am I the only one who thinks this thread shouldn't be here.  Rather more properly, in the Ice Breaker Section?

[vwrw]

If I were 28y.o and were still virgin I would be ashamed of this. Due to my mind it could mean during 10 years none of men wanted me so strong to get me (why none wanted?) and I did not want any of men (perhaps, there is a psychological problem in her mind)   
I know one woman who is 30y.o and she still is virgin. She does not care of her hygiene and considers all men to be lascivious animals.
Fred, ask your woman how much she take care of her hygiene and what she thinks about men in general.

[Mir]

Maybe she was a lesbian till now and now decided to go straight.
Just a thoought
 

[groovlstk]

i have been writing to a russian girl (28yrs old) i'm 60yrs age is of no consequence .

Do you honestly believe age is no consequence?

her clothes were to say the least shabby giving impression of living down to earth

Down to earth? Try "dirt poor."

Her virginity seems to be her pride she is proud to be a virgin and so she should.she just wants to be loved.
am i being a silly old man?

I won't answer that question, but if she hasn't asked for $$ she's probably not a scammer. However, odds are that she's desperate to escape her living conditions, and you're her mule. Will she stay with you if you do a K1 for her and marry her? Only time will tell, but it's not a risk I'd take.

[jb]

I think the whole virgin thing is a smoke screen.  Usually the virginity question doesn't come up except when some oddball religious cults are involved.  Is Fred a member of a religion which places importance on that?    Is she a member of such a church?  As vwrw correctly points out, what is her general attitude towards men?  Being 28 y.o. and still a virgin is highly unusual.

There is a whole list of things we don't know regarding this 2 months long correspondence.  How did this pen pal relationship begin?  How did Fred find her, (or more probable, how did she find him?) I think it's more likely he placed a scam bait advertisement on the net?  How well does she speak and write English?  Are they communicating through a 3rd party?  If so, who's doing the translating?  There is just too much we don't know about this, but the early poll results don't look good.

i been scammed a coupled times luckily never parted with money.

This statement tells me Fred hasn't yet been to the FSU.

her pictures were ordinary,taken on a back drop of the ocean

This statement tells me she probably isn't a Russian, more likely Ukrainian, unless she's from Vladivostok.  But,,, isn't Lugansk landlocked?  I'm curious about the ocean backdrop in the photos.

Once again we are asked for opinions and advice without having enough information.  Maybe Fred will enlighten us.

Maybe she was a lesbian till now and now decided to go straight.
Just a thoought

TFF, but I'd submit to you that since Albert has been handing out dildos, even that seems unlikely. 

[Mir]

 

In the seventies when I was a pre-teen boy I discovered a stash of videos belonging to my parents. I was a series of soft porn movies ‘The Emmanuel series’ staring Sylvia Crystal. Very exciting at that time, and I remember her classification of a Virgin: ‘A woman who has known only one man’ so I guess by that definition even if she has been committed to only one dildo she should qualify.
I agree we need more info. Especially about the site where young FSU virgins are looking for older Western men!
I think there is no Ocean anywhere near Ukraine either. So it could have been the black sea in the back, or as you say she is from Vladivostok.

[Michelangelo]

With the backdrop of an ocean, with today's photography, it's quite possible the pic was made in a studio.

Fred- Two negatives here.

1 )  Being a virgin at her age is highly unlikely.

2)  Since she does not know you and since you have been writing such a short time, she should NOT be talking to you about money.

I'm virtually positive you have yourself a scammer.

p.s.  MOD- I'm with JB.  Can you move this thread to Icebreakers?

[jb]

As an after thought,,, how can you have a 2 month correspondence, with the object of marriage ultimately being the goal, and not have talked on the phone? 

Seems very strange to me.

[pete]

hi.
i have been talking to a girl very similar to Fred's.she came onto me in a dating site datingforsingleparents.co.uk .she introduced herself her profilesaid she was from america but she revealed it was Kirov in Russia.i have written to her for about 10 days now.her letters were all about herself,her home town,her salary was $178 a month she rarely goes to the cinema.,she is is 28 years old and still a virgin.i am in my mid 50's ,she has sent me pictures about 5 all in the same clothes but different poses.the background or back drop  is of an ocean its a picture on a wall as Fred put in his letter.she wrote daily until  two days ago.she always wears a light blue cardigan and jeans.the cardigan is worn at the cuffs not your normal model posing just very ordinary pictures.she told me she lived with her retired parents in a small apartment.she hasnt asked for money or anything but i've been scammed once before so trying to check this one out as i do think alot about her but dont want to be scammed again.i have written and asked her questions ,three times for address but avoided each time ,I dont even have a surname for her.i dont want to put her name but if that sounds like the same girl and you want to email me on pete_booth2001@yahoo.com i will be only happy to give you more details.I have done the normal checks of scammer pages but havent found her but it does sound very similar to Fred's.any help would be appreciated as i want to be fair to her and also be careful.thanks

[groovlstk]

Maybe I'm wrong, but any girl who advertises the fact that she's a virgin sets off major alarms in my mind. First and foremost, she's likely wanting you to believe she's extraordinarily moral and decent, so when she needs money for her mom's heart surgery and sings the Western Union siren song, you'll be more likely to give in.

Secondly, attitudes towards sex in Russia and Ukraine are much more liberal than in the stodgy West. If she's 28 and still hasn't been poked... something is seriously wrong with her.

[William3rd]

Oh, for Pete's sake. Just tell her you are coming to her home town to see her and see what she says.

The stench of a scammer is already all over this one. The first lie- about which continent she is on- sinks the boat. Doesnt matter whether she is on a scam list or not. The scammers have to evolve their technique as the scam detection improves.

Dont even give any of these women (under your facts) any credibility. Sounds like she is already asking for money-the hint is as good as the asking.

Hey- has she started having any of those dreams and feelings(unvirginlike) toward you yet?

[ScottinCrimea]

I have to agree.  Already too many red flags on this one.  Like many men, you are probably afraid to push things too far because you hate to rally find out that it is a scam.  Insist on her home address and phone number or say you will stop writing her and see what happens.  If she is sincere, she will appreciate your straightforwardness and sense of responsibility.

[Ste]

Secondly, attitudes towards sex in Russia and Ukraine are much more liberal than in the stodgy West. If she's 28 and still hasn't been poked... something is seriously wrong with her.

Stodgy US and A more like! We Brits are liberal shaggers and noted perverts, look at our Members of Parlaiment....

[Gator]

attitudes towards sex in Russia and Ukraine are much more liberal than in the stodgy West. If she's 28 and still hasn't been poked... something is seriously wrong with her.

Is the West any different?  I think not! 

[fred_blogg]

Pete
please forgive me for not giving my real name.I read your article in the forum.Even now I'm hoping its not the same girl.She seemed more genuine and sincere than all the others,how foolish can a lonely old man be?.I would have gladly helped her but after two months she would not reveal her details i put this down to be over cautious as she had been hurt in the past.
I looked forward to her letters and when they stopped i was sick to my stomach,love sick teenager at heart.i have sent an email with her picture.
she came to me via a dating site.The pictures are of her standing infront of a large picture of the ocean.
putting this down to stupidity

[Turboguy]

It is not being stupid Fred.   They are very well trained in their scams.   Most have spent a lot of time working out just the right words to appeal the their targets.  Most can be writing a few thousand men and send a letter each day.  Together they scam hundreds of millions of dollars off unsuspecting men. 

The only good part of it is that it often opens someones eyes to Russian women and many of the guys here developed their interest by being scammed by someone posing as an attractive young Russian women.

[ConnerVT]

The only good part of it is that it often opens someones eyes to Russian women and many of the guys here developed their interest by being scammed by someone posing as an attractive young Russian women.

** raises hand **

[BillyB]

The only good part of it is that it often opens someones eyes to Russian women and many of the guys here developed their interest by being scammed by someone posing as an attractive young Russian women.

The bad part is that a lot of men get turned off of RW forever and then stereotype and scammers have taken a lot of attention away from the women who do deserve attention, the sincere ladies.