The Previous Research Project - Cyberbrides in America (Planet-Love)

[Michelangelo]

\Imagine if Ada didn't collect RWD members thoughts etc and she relied on people like Sm00thOperator???  I would be horrified for anyone to think he was the benchmark for men in this pursuit!

That's exactly why a true researcher would want to gather data in an open forum for betten content verification.  Outlandish statements need peer review and verification.  I question her research methodlogy.

[Globetrotter]

Bruno, nicely done.  You are soooo correct!

[Michelangelo]

I was trained as an ethnographer and mainly do qualitative methods.

Ada,  I'm puzzled by your research design.  Both of us know that group interaction yields much richer data than does individual interviews.  Individual interviews may be useful, but the richness of the data are contained in the more holistic setting.

I'd suggest to you that most of your research or dialogue should be done in the public forum, and only a small piece be from private communications.  That way, you'll have the group picture intstead of individual pieces that may be distorted.

Best wishes in your research.

[Kuna]

Am I going to guarantee that everyone is going to like my results? No. But one thing I can say is that what I learned so far deconstructs many stereotypes about men who are involved in international dating and marriage.

Ada,  through the past few posts you might have just learnt something else about men that are seeking International Marriage.  We know that there are people out there who disapprove of the path we're taking.

At times people slander the men and women who are seeking love this way.  Even though we know some "small people" will label us as sex-tourists or abusers, we continue to pursue what we want because we believe the positives outweigh the negatives.

I would love to see a live debate between those that oppose International Marriages and a few of the guys in here.  I think the outcome would be fairly clear.

Of course you could never get anyone from "that" side to enter a reasonable debate because there is no truth in the stereotype.

Cheers!

Kuna

[Bruno]

\Imagine if Ada didn't collect RWD members thoughts etc and she relied on people like Sm00thOperator???  I would be horrified for anyone to think he was the benchmark for men in this pursuit!

That's exactly why a true researcher would want to gather data in an open forum for betten content verification.  Outlandish statements need peer review and verification.  I question her research methodlogy.

Just curious... if she use the open forum and that someone post something who don't please the majority of members, it will turn in some type of fight... same with closed topic, some will start new one for say that they don't agree...

If the result of the study show that 50% of the guy are sex tourist... what is the problem, since i know that i am not one... you have idiot, sex tourist, dreamer, violent people everywhere, and i am sure that we have our share of so people on these forum...

Making the reply to question on the forum will only lead the more "weak" or "out of the norm" to make false reply who follow the majority or make not reply at all...

Why do you think that vote during election is secret and not make by rising hand... simply for keep out the influence of other... Ada seem to use similar method here... she don't wish the only norm, she will all the colors from the rainbow... and see the weight (%) of each color...

[Michelangelo]

Just curious... if she use the open forum and that someone post something who don't please the majority of members, it will turn in some type of fight... same with closed topic, some will start new one for say that they don't agree...

Bruno, in ethnographic research, the researcher tries to see the big picture first, and not individual parts.  It's important to see the diversity of opinion of members here, and the debates they carry on. 

Thought stimulates thought, so the data will be much richer because of the dialogue.  And more accurate, too.

[dwfunk]

I'd suggest to you that most of your research or dialogue should be done in the public forum, and only a small piece be from private communications.  That way, you'll have the group picture intstead of individual pieces that may be distorted.

I can't belive you just said that!

When one is looking for the "nuances" you DON'T use a 'group' setting.  Surely you know that??


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David & Natalia
Republic of Texas/Moscow , Russia
УЛ. КОНЕНКОВА
16th World Spacemodeling Championships

[dwfunk]

Well, you have more to lose.  If it's bad, and came from your board, with your permission . . . that's not going to look good, and will be damaging to the good you're trying to do here.

Running any Public Anything, runs the risk of being misconstrued, especially those things which are controversial or sensational. Goes with the territory.  It boils down to the heat in the kitchen, if you can't stand it, get out.  Pretty simple concept.


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David & Natalia
Republic of Texas/Moscow , Russia
УЛ. КОНЕНКОВА
16th World Spacemodeling Championships

[dwfunk]

and another comment and I'll shut-up for tonight.  People do NOT say the same things in Public as they do in Private.  Known fact.

Especially with the hot heads around here.


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David & Natalia
Republic of Texas/Moscow , Russia
УЛ. КОНЕНКОВА
16th World Spacemodeling Championships

[TexasBoar]

Running any Public Anything, runs the risk of being misconstrued, especially those things which are controversial or sensational. Goes with the territory.  It boils down to the heat in the kitchen, if you can't stand it, get out.  Pretty simple concept.

Yeah, I know.  I admin a religious (pre-xtian, polytheistic, non-mainstream) forum, so I certainly DO know, lol.  I was a little taken aback by Dan's tone, is all, until I put things into that perspective.  He works pretty hard on all this stuff.

Michaelangelo's reaction, I'm just gonna put down to snotfight la academe. I've seen those kinds of turf wars before as well.

~Boar

[Michelangelo]

I can't belive you just said that!

When one is looking for the "nuances" you DON'T use a 'group' setting.  Surely you know that??


----------
David & Natalia
Republic of Texas/Moscow , Russia
??. ?????????
16th World Spacemodeling Championships

I don't think you understand, dwfunk.  What I'm saying is that when a topic is discussed by a group, MUCH more information comes forth than in one-on-one discussions.  For example, you may say something that I did not think of, and I will comment and extend what you said.  That is why I used the "ladder" analogy.

If you really WANT to explore and flush out a topic, group think is superior.

[Photo Guy]

Group Think is superior when it comes to formulating valid generalizations, like, 'RW have qualities that we like better than AW.'  But individual stories show an extreme variety of personalities, strategies, and outcomes. One guy may use an agency and another may bump into his future wife at a train station. And both guys may end up with the same result- a happy marriage. By looking at the individual stories, I think it would be possible to see the common elements and reach valid conclusions, while seeing how various personality types cope with the task at hand. Looking at a bunch of guys preaching about do's and don'ts, or having hot disagreements probably won't result in a clear undrstanding of anything. The more individual stories digested, the more accurate the general conclusions should be, for the reader. Anyway, that's my take on it.   

[Bruno]

Bruno, in ethnographic research, the researcher tries to see the big picture first, and not individual parts.  It's important to see the diversity of opinion of members here, and the debates they carry on. 

Thought stimulates thought, so the data will be much richer because of the dialogue.  And more accurate, too.

Until now, data will not be more accurate with a public debat... but for know this, you need to see the question... the first range of question was already posted on these forum :

I. Age
II. Occupation
III. Education
IV. Married, Single, Divorced
V. Number of children
VI. What have your experiences of dating American women like?
VII. Why are you interested in the international dating through the introduction agency?

Do you see something who can be debated on a open forum... simple personal question... the second round have the following question :

XI. Why do foreign women appeal to you?
XII. Some scholars argue that feminism is the reason that many men turn to foreign women for marriage. Does feminism have anything to do with your use of international dating agency or interest in foreign women?
XIII. Are you currently involved with a woman? What is the relationship like? What attracts you to her? What do you look for in a woman?
XIV. What are the challenges in terms of international dating and marriage?
XV. People have used the term mail order bride to describe international dating. Do you agree with this term? If not, what term would you use?

Again personal question directed to a individual...

Why do you wish the possibility to debate over personal idea or fact... some of these data can be find in the introduction section of these forum but not everybody make a introduction, say who he is and tell his personal history... The result of these research will be more important that the method used... by asking question in a personal way, she will have all the piece of the puzzle, making the same on a open forum will lead to picture only these who have the more big mounth, and these are not specialy the majority of people involved in these process...

And since we have daily more non members that members who visit these forum, it will be good that Ada post a e-mail where non members can write her if they wish participate... the silent mass is the majority of people involved in these process, several read and learn but don't participate... and same so, the study will not be perfect since these forum make flee all the crazy one to other place... imagine the result if she have make the same on a other forum where guys ask where they can buy a RW !

Being a ex-agency owner, i can say that the membership here is not representatif of the full dating communauty... the communauty is far better and normal that the full whole... don't believe me ! Simply ask someone like Richard that several trust to tell about some of the "customer"... ok, he filter the sex maniac, the crazy one... but not all the agency make the same...

Hunting Ada and she will go to other place for his work... and lead to a final result who will represent the men dating foreign woman in a more bad way...

[jb]

As noted above, the first questions are:

I. Age
II. Occupation
III. Education
IV. Married, Single, Divorced
V. Number of children
VI. What have your experiences of dating American women (been) like?
VII. Why are you interested in the international dating through the introduction agency?

These first questions establish the length and width of the surveyed group, these are items that are easily graphed, weighted, and categorized.   The remaining two questions are somewhat subjective and call for opinion and speculation.  IMHO, these two question would not yeild valuable data, only fuel for the feminist detractor. 

The second half, as noted above:

XI. Why do foreign women appeal to you?
XII. Some scholars argue that feminism is the reason that many men turn to foreign women for marriage. Does feminism have anything to do with your use of international dating agency or interest in foreign women?
XIII. Are you currently involved with a woman? What is the relationship like? What attracts you to her? What do you look for in a woman?
XIV. What are the challenges in terms of international dating and marriage?
XV. People have used the term mail order bride to describe international dating. Do you agree with this term? If not, what term would you use?

These two bolded items bespeak a strong feminist agenda.

Item XIII is actually 4 questions, I have never seen a truly scientific study so sloppily constructed and so poorly thought out.  It makes me wonder about the author's real credentials.

Item XIV is another non-question which would yeild very little useful data to a social scientist, answers would be all over the page.

Item XV goes back to the feminist roots.  The deliberate use by an AW of a derogatory term, "mail order bride" here on this fourm should be viewed in the same light as a white man using the N word at a NAACP meeting.

I think those men who are arguing to allow this thing to continue have been baited into yet another feminist plot to present the subject of foreign brides and their respective husbands in, yet again, a less than flattering way.  As Dan noted, there has not ever been a truly unbiased survey done on the subject of the MOB business and why men are doing this.  I don't expect this study will be any different.  If you look at the spectrum of responders to these questions, the feminist will have a field day with guys like Turbo and his followers.  Older men (aged 64) chasing young women, vwrw (aged 27) is exactly the kind of datapoint they are hoping for to slather on the entirely subjective abuse by American men on the poor, mostly unattractive, mostly uneducated, ignored, and unappreciate AW in favor of a better looking and younger foreign woman.

I refuse to participate in nonsense such as this, IMHO, no good will come of it. 
 

[Michelangelo]

Group Think is superior when it comes to formulating valid generalizations, like, 'RW have qualities that we like better than AW.'  But individual stories show an extreme variety of personalities, strategies, and outcomes.

This is such an innacurate statement. Naive is the word.

Let me 'splain why...

Twenty individual stories = Twenty.

Twenty stories told in a group trigger more memories and experiences and scaffolding.  Now twenty = > twenty.

The whole is greater than the sum of the parts.

Researchers know this.

[Michelangelo]

I have never seen a truly scientific study so sloppily constructed and so poorly thought out.  It makes me wonder about the author's real credentials.

JB, in his usual manner, is more direct than me.  My posts have hinted at what he says directly.  He's right.

In my profession, I review graduate programs (Ph.D.) for accreditation.  A key component is the quantity and QUALITY of the faculty research. Generally, research published in the top tiered, peer reviewed journals is respected.  Such journals would not publish a study with a weak design.  And a weak design is what I see in this study.

The researcher is supposed to come to research with an unbiased view.  All people in reality have biases, so the research design must filter these out.  In terms of the little I have seen of this study, this design does not.

THAT'S WHY I ENCOURAGED THE AUTHOR OF THIS STUDY TO DISCUSS IT IN PUBLIC.  HAD SHE DONE THIS, the bias could have been pointed out and the design corrected.  By going private, she ignores the very tenants of collaboration.

I've also directed Ph.D. programs.  There we train newbies how to do research.  They present their design to a committee of five professors who are experts in research.  There the design is corrected.

A flawed design yields flawed data.

[jb]

Thank you, Michael, for the support.

I tend to be leery of any poll or questionnaire that isn't being done by respected researchers.  I have participated in such studies and noted there is never an open ended test item in the poll.  Each question has to be a complete thought with a specific answer, usually a "yes" or a "no".  So far this study ranks as very amateurish, in my very humble opinion.

Researchers, such as Gallup, Rand, the Hoover Institute, and a few others who specialize in gathering data points from the public are experts in designing questionnaires with bias filters built in.  The moment I saw the words "mail order bride" I thought to myself, "ut oh, something ain't quite kosher here".  I don't believe a quality researcher would introduce bias with the poll test items.

You guys can do what you want with Ada, but I'm guessing you are being set up by a troll.  The fact that a member has actually met the troll doesn't mean she isn't one.  Proceed with extreme caution if you decide to answer questions from this person.

Just my 2 cents,,, again.

[smsmsmsm]

I want to thank JB and Michael for your critical comments and critiques. I sincerely respect your opinions on my project. It is understandable why people would construe my intent as another feminist plot to represent members here negatively. With my study being seeen as a feminist plot, I am not sure if I should feel hurt or honored. As I have stated, having read all the studies about "mail order brides," I have set out to understand what this community is like. I did not bring preconceived conceptions into the processs with the attempt to gather data to prove the existing theories. Rather, I would like to know first hand if the picture that has been painted is true, or if it could be understood differently. Let me make this clear. I have no agenda. I have no plot. If I do, I could have just stayed invisible and did a textual analysis of the website. I could also do a comparative study of all the websites. I did not have to go through the process of introducing myself and requesting permission to stay. I introduced myself with the hope to have honest dialogue with the people here.     

Let me say this again. Pursuing private communication is only another strategy I use to gather data, not the only one. Both public dialogues and in-depth interviews allow me to gain a more accurate picture of the community. In fact, I do depend on the public forum for the majority of my data. Contacting members privately is not my intent to go clandestine or conceals my agenda. Maybe I should have made it clear in public that I also intended to do private interviews.

I posted my questions below. It is a bit different from the version that was being discussed since my questions have been evolving as I proceed with the research. It is important to point out that this research is different from others since this is not face to face interviews. It is strictly based on written communications. Therefore, it is difficult for me to be spontaneous about following up with questions. In some questions, I have 2-4 subquestions. That is because they serve as follow up questions. Instead of separating them into different questions, I decided to group them into one big question.

I will explain why I ask these questions and the reason I ask them. I have asked some of the questions in public. Some of the questions are best suitable for private discussion. Question 1 to  7 is for demographic purpose. That will give me a sense of the person's background in terms of education, occupation and class status. Do I intend to use them as part of the statistics? No. I don't have a huge number of interviews to produce meaningful statistical data. However, this information is important to contextualize the stories.

I. Age
II. Occupation
III. Education
IV. Married, Single, Divorced
V. Number of children
VI. Social status: middle class, upper class, etc
VII. Politics: conservative, liberal, etc?

I ask the following questions against the previous studies that have been done. For example, some studies claim that men pursue foreign women because they are not marketable locally, etc. For example, I ask question 8 and 9 because I would like to know what people's experiences are like and what leads them to pursue this particular path. Are the past claims true? This is not something that members would feel comfortable discussing in the public forum. The important thing is that I have received a wide range of responses that go way beyond the marketability issue and people pursue international relationship for different reasons. The question about feminism is also something that is repeatedly discussed in literature. I have asked question 11 and 12 in the public forum. I ask them in private communication for each individual. When I asked this question in the public forum, not everyone participated in the conversation. I would like to ask people's opinions in case they don't want to express them in public. 

VIII. What have your experiences of dating American women like?
XI. Why are you interested in the international dating through the introduction agency? How did you become interested?
X. What have your experiences been like with introduction agencies?
XI. Why do foreign women appeal to you?
XII. Some scholars argue that feminism is the reason that many men turn to foreign women for marriage. What do you think of feminism? Does feminism have anything to do with your use of international dating agency or interest in foreign women?

The following questions are personal questions that people would not want to reveal in public forums. Why is it important for me to know the stories? Question 13 allows me to show the nature of the relationships involving international dating and marriages. How is it similar to or different from the typical relationships? This is important information because it allows me to put some "realness" to the people involved and to the relationships discussed. It allows me to paint a human face to the community, so to speak.

XIII. Are you currently involved with a woman? What is the relationship like? What attracts you to her? What do you look for in a woman?
XIV. What are the challenges in terms of international dating and marriage?

Again, literature has been using the term mail order bride. I want to get a sense of people's views on this particular issue. I also want to get a sense of what reasons compel people to pursue a cross-border relationships. I have posed all these questions on board. Here is the thing, not everyone participated in the group discussion. However, for the private communication, people provided me with their private thoughts, thoughts they would not have shared otherwise. They provided me with their private experiences, experiences that would not have been shared otherwise.

XV. People have used the term mail order bride to describe international dating. Do you agree with this term? If not, what term would you use?
XVI. Based on your observations, what are the reasons that men are interested in international dating or international marriage?
XVII. Based on your observations, what are the reasons why foreign women are interested in the international dating or marriage?
XVIII. What do you think of the current immigration laws? People have argued that current immigration laws make subject women to abuse. What do you think of it? How would you revise the immigration law?
XIX: I am not sure if you have the statistics. Is there a higher divorce rate among couples who are involved in international dating and marriages? If higher, what makes it difficult? If lower, what do you think makes it easier to sustain an international marriage?

I am not sure what agenda I am bringing in here. I pose questions about issues that have been discussed in literature. I am simply curious about members' thoughts and reactions to those issues. I am not sure if they serve as baits to push my agenda. I guess any questions I ask can be seen as baits to push certain agenda. It is not about the questions. It is about me, isn't it?

Very humble moment.................

Ada

[Bruno]

If you look at the spectrum of responders to these questions, the feminist will have a field day with guys like Turbo and his followers.  Older men (aged 64) chasing young women, vwrw (aged 27) is exactly the kind of datapoint they are hoping for to slather on the entirely subjective abuse by American men on the poor, mostly unattractive, mostly uneducated, ignored, and unappreciate AW in favor of a better looking and younger foreign woman.

  and why she send her question to me... not a old guy, no American, my lady is older that vwrw, etc ... She is open on information coming from every side... and really, if you fair this, why you don't participate... can be interesting for her to know view from a old man who have marry a mature woman and who have never use marriage agency...

The moment I saw the words "mail order bride" I thought to myself, "ut oh, something ain't quite kosher here".  I don't believe a quality researcher would introduce bias with the poll test items.

MOB is the term used by almost everybody... that we don't like it change nothing... and remember previous post of Ada who ask what term can be better that MOB...

[Shadow]

Ada,

You state to be objective, so let me point out some things in your post that seem inconsistent.

As I have stated, having read all the studies about "mail order brides," I have set out to understand what this community is like. I did not bring preconceived conceptions into the processs with the attempt to gather data to prove the existing theories. Rather, I would like to know first hand if the picture that has been painted is true, or if it could be understood differently.

You bring no preconceived conceptions yet want to know if the picture that has been painted is true.
In my opinion that means you do have a concept in your mind from the studies. Perhaps you can tell us about this picture so that we understand your starting point.

XII. Some scholars argue that feminism is the reason that many men turn to foreign women for marriage. What do you think of feminism? Does feminism have anything to do with your use of international dating agency or interest in foreign women?
XV. People have used the term mail order bride to describe international dating. Do you agree with this term? If not, what term would you use?
XVI. Based on your observations, what are the reasons that men are interested in international dating or international marriage?
XVII. Based on your observations, what are the reasons why foreign women are interested in the international dating or marriage?
XVIII. What do you think of the current immigration laws? People have argued that current immigration laws make subject women to abuse. What do you think of it? How would you revise the immigration law?
XIX: I am not sure if you have the statistics. Is there a higher divorce rate among couples who are involved in international dating and marriages? If higher, what makes it difficult? If lower, what do you think makes it easier to sustain an international marriage?

The questions show that the literature you have been reading is of feminist nature. They point to feminism being cause of en looking for international dating. Also they hint at abuse issues. Finally you ask a question that you know most can only reply by guess.

From your link I learned that you are originating from Taiwan. There for I would like to ask you some questions.
1. Did you move to the US for study or as part of a family ?
2. Does the fact that you have international origin influence your view on international dating ?
3. Do you notice a difference in attitude of women in the US and Taiwan and how do you think this affects relationships.

I ask these to know more about your background and see fro which angle you are working.
If you do not wish to answer this in public you can find my e-mail

[Bruno]

In my profession, I review graduate programs (Ph.D.) for accreditation.  A key component is the quantity and QUALITY of the faculty research. Generally, research published in the top tiered, peer reviewed journals is respected.  Such journals would not publish a study with a weak design.  And a weak design is what I see in this study.

Maybe you are right Michael... but take a look at http://condor.depaul.edu/%7Esoc/cv/ChengCV2006.pdf

The .pdf is the CV of Ada... you can take a look at her numerous award/Grants/honors, and about her peer reviewed book or journal articles... and you can add a lot of conference... 

For these who wish, you can find a article written by Ada at http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qa3687/is_200401/ai_n9381303 ( 18 page long  )

[smsmsmsm]

Hi Shadow and all,

99% of the research on "MOB" is feminist in nature. The studies have mostly focused on the representation of women, the racial politics involving "MOB," the commodification of women, the unequal power dynamics between Western men and Third World women, et. Am I familiar with the arguments? Yes. Did I set out this study to prove their arguments? No. These studies provide a general depiction of the men involved in international dating and marriage. What is missing from the literature is their subjectivities, i.e., views, thoughts, ideas, and dreams uttered from their perspectives. Their voices, so to speak. That is what I set out to find out and am particularly interested in.   

Shadow, regarding your questions about my background, I don't mind discussing it here if it helps you understand me better. I came to this country mainly for study, i.e., to pursue an advanced degree. As an immigrant woman, I have affinity for immigrant women's experiences and perspectives. That sparkles my interest in international dating and marriage to a certain extent. I have difficulty with your third question. What attitude are you referring to? In what aspect? I need some clarification in order to answer the third question.

Ada

[Admin]

Hi Shadow and all,

99% of the research on "MOB" is feminist in nature. The studies have mostly focused on the representation of women, the racial politics involving "MOB," the commodification of women, the unequal power dynamics between Western men and Third World women, et. Am I familiar with the arguments? Yes. Did I set out this study to prove their arguments? No. These studies provide a general depiction of the men involved in international dating and marriage. What is missing from the literature is their subjectivities, i.e., views, thoughts, ideas, and dreams uttered from their perspectives. Their voices, so to speak. That is what I set out to find out and am particularly interested in.   

Shadow, regarding your questions about my background, I don't mind discussing it here if it helps you understand me better. I came to this country mainly for study, i.e., to pursue an advanced degree. As an immigrant woman, I have affinity for immigrant women's experiences and perspectives. That sparkles my interest in international dating and marriage to a certain extent. I have difficulty with your third question. What attitude are you referring to? In what aspect? I need some clarification in order to answer the third question.

Ada

Ada,

Having lived in Taipei for a time, I have seen first-hand the differences in culture, economies, and attitudes between Taiwan and Ukraine - and they are NOT insignificant.

Your experience as an immigrant from Taiwan may well predispose you to biases based on your own experience. How will you normalize those potential biases - or do you consider them moot for some reason?

Not meaning to sound confrontational - but curious.

- Dan

[Globetrotter]

Ada,

I can see you have been quite busy this weekend, defending yourself.  No need, as I see your intentions as genuine.  You probably have enough insight into this endeadour with those you have met in person or in print to formulate an opinion as to what you think.  Let's see:  JB won't participate, but KenC chooses to indulge you privately, your acedemic equal ridicules you as you won't play by the rules set forth in his world.  Who cares!  You have probably found/formulated an opinion with as little as a couple weeks access.  Dan, now questions your motives...because you "think outside the box" that our Michelangelo would have you stay in.    

Does one think KenC's input is not valuable?  Here's a guy who married a girl half his age 8 years ago, and others want to know how and why.  Maybe he chose well, and maybe he's lucky, or both.  You have our very own "turboguy" who's about to marry a girl young enough to be his grand-daughter.  Is he pissing up a rope?  You have those just starting out and looking for information, or a "formula" for success, where one doesn't exist.  Me, I'm involved with a girl 10 years younger...and wishes I was 5 years younger or she, 5 years older.  As you can see, we are all over the board.  If I knew how to tell you to access the "sex tourist" smoothoperator, I would tell you how, as he would also bring some different thinking into this process.

Anyway, as I told everyone here, you were genuine, delightful, worldly and introspective, fair minded, and cute too for a 3'6" girl with 10 earrings!!!  To Hell with all of them, just do your thing, which I'm sure will be fair as you again, have the ability to "think outside the box."

To answer some questions we may not have covered:

education:  bs in aeronautical engineering, ba in business admin.
                real world education:  traveling...everywhere...Tehran, Baghdad,
                Kabul, Karachi, Islamabad, Timbuktu, (Mali) Chittagong  
               (Bangladesh) and everyplace in between.

Why I'm attracted to foreign girls:  in my mid 50's, my choice of women is
               48-58 here.  Those I've met who carry more baggage than
               Samsonite has ever produced is astounding.  Those who are
               in counseling because of past relationships, or those in
               shrink counseling because they hate their mothers is also
               astounding.  (Gee..do you think anywhere else holds more
               promise?)

Middle Class...other:  I live well.

Occupation:  I own the store.

Ada, as you were not born here, you already carry a fresh perspective into this endeavour.  As you are highly educated and are able to think outside the box is also a plus.  As Bruno says...if you put us in the same box as everyone before...who cares.  

Me, I don't care what anyone thinks.  My family thought I was crazy...then they met my squeeze, and now they adore her.  My friends (whose opinion I don't seek) also adore her.  Age is appropriate for me, thus I'm happy within myself.

PS: now it's time to pick up the Balabushka and practice my straight pool game as I might need to support myself that way in the future.  And...
how bout dem Bears...they won again.

[Admin]

Globetrotter,

Please do not presume to state the 'why' of my questions. I believe I have been forthright about my questions - and the why. If others echo those - or I echo other's - does not negate them as MINE.

Further, just as Ada may feel a bit defensive given the questioning - no-one promised this was going to be easy - particularly in light of the enormous negative, and biased, 'press' received in the past.

If Ada chooses to push through the questioning and produces a result that is unbiased and factual, then she may well accomplish what many have not.

In any case - I do not feel the least bit bad about the questions posed so far - and neither should Ada. We have a right to address the questions, and to receive reasonable and believable answers before deciding to participate in what easily could be yet another sham effort to produce a report which has no relation to reality. So far, Ada is doing a laudable job of addressing the tough questions she has received - though I believe there are still some valid questions to be answered. I hope Ada answers those.

- Dan