How to drink vodka~

[TexasBoar]

A member of a cigar forum I'm on (and the forum's expert on spirits of all kinds, but especially single malt Scotch) posted this from what he described simply as a "Russian Blog."

I was wondering if anyone here had seen this, heard of this, or tried this?

Russians are renowned for drinking a lot of vodka staying sober. That’s not something to do with biological inheritance but with the way we drink. Russians believe that foreigners don’t know how to drink. They don’t eat while drinking. They mix cocktails. They sip vodka instead of taking shots. They drink vodka with highly carbonated sodas. In short, they do everything to get drunk from the minimum amount of alcohol. May be it has something to do with innate Western avidity or expensiveness of alcohol.

Russians, on the other hand, do everything to stay sober while drinking as much alcohol as possible. How do we do it? We try to neutralize alcohol as long as possible. I try to outline the basic principles of vodka drinking for uninitiated.
One hour before the party

1. Eat a couple of boiled potatoes.

2. Drinks one or two raw eggs.

3. Drink one or two table-spoons of olive oil. Sunflower oil will also do.

Thus it’s guaranteed that at the Russian party you will stay sober for at least one bottle of vodka. I’m not kidding. Raw eggs are the most important part of Russian pre-party preparations.
At the party

1. If you start drinking vodka – drink only vodka. No beer or wine. No water or juice. Carbonated drinks are taboo.

2. Drink vodka only in shots. Never sip.

3. Eat immediately after taking a shot. Russian zakuskis are often translated as appetizers. That’s not quite correct. Zakuskis are something you ‘zakusyvayesh’ with after taking a shot of vodka. They are very important to neutralize alcohol. That’s why they all contain two most important alcohol neutralizers – acid and salt. I recommend taking the following sequence:

- immediately after taking a shot – two slices of lemon;

- then some salted cucumbers, pickles, marinated tomatoes or caviar.

- then something with a lot of oil: herring (traditionally with cold boiled potatoes and onion), sardines, or shproty (small smoked sprats in olive oil);

- then traditional Russian salads, like Oliviye or Herring with boiled beet and mayonnaise. Almost all Russian salads come under heavy mayonnaise dressing. Remember – acid, salt, eggs and oil. Ukrainians and Southern Russians prefer smoked lard with garlic but it’s a zakuska for professionals.

4. Only three first vodka shots at a Russian party are ‘obligatory’ so to say. That means you have to take them if you want to show you’re a friendly person but not an unsociable person. After that you can ‘miss’ one or two shots. Just say, “Ya propuskayu” (Literally, I make it slip) and cover your glass with your palm. That doesn’t mean you can abstain from drinking till the end of the party. It means (excusing yourself that you’re a foreigner) can take one shot out of two your Russian guests take.

I think, some Russian party traditions need to be explained here. In Russia we party around a big table with bottles and zakuskis. We drink only when someone makes a toast and we drink all together. The person who makes a toast usually pours vodka to all glasses. Taking a bottle yourself and drinking vodka without others is a faux pas. Actually you (and all others) are ordered to drink after a toast. Everyone at the party is supposed to make a toast – being a foreigner is not an excuse. So be prepared – buy yourself a book on party toasts (there are a lot of them on sale in Russia) and learn some by heart.

5. Zakuskis part of the party take about an hour – or something like 200 grams (4 shots) of vodka. Then comes “goryacheye” (hot dishes). Even though zakuskis could be very filling – you should eat goryacheye if you want not be become drunk.

6. Actively participate in intellectual talks around the table. Mental activity is probably the best method to keep you excited but sober. Try, for example, to drink two pints of beer while reading a philosophical book and see the result.

7. At the end of the party come tea and cakes. Don’t miss it too. This way you show your hosts that you’re survived the party without dire consequences.

Now in the course of 4 or 5 hours you drunk a bottle of vodka (500 grams) and you’re only slightly tight.
After the party.

1. Keep a small bottle of beer in refrigerator. Wake up at about 5 in the morning, drink your beer and go back to bed. It prevents hang-over in the morning.

2. If the early morning beer didn’t help (it usually does), drink a glass of brine from the jar you kept you pickles in.

Many Russians recommend taking a shot of vodka in the morning to fights hang-over. Don’t do it. It helps only alcoholics. If you’re not, it will make things worse.

The raw eggs part puts me in mind of snipe hunting and pine floats, but the guy who posted it says he's "been there, done that."

~Boar

[jb]

Everything the man wrote is spot on.  The only snack thing I saw he missed was the pickled cod livers, they are my favs. yum~!

[Jet]

I'm going to back jb up here! There were only one or two little items I hadn't heard of before (like: two slices of "lemon"). When drinking with your lady's friends you may well chase the shots with Pepsi, but you won't see this at family get togethers often, when the older generation is around. As far as the beer in the morning, this is generally ONLY needed when you're drinking the rot-gut variety (or as they call it - "jet fuel"). At Lil's grandmother's birthday we sat down for the afternoon and polished off 13 bottles of vodka into the evening. This photo was taken AFTER the vodka was gone:

Grandmother (lower rt) Mama (red dress) and Grandmother's friend (black dress) drank only wine that day, Niko obviously had apple juice, so the others and myself consumed that quantity without feeling "ripped" afterward, and devoid of hangovers the next morning.

If you go, stay away from vodkas cheaper than 125-150py (@ $5 per 500ml) as you may live to regret it. If you can afford Putinka or better yet Russian Standard platinum (@ 14.50) by all means go for it, they are excellent. *disclaimer: Moscow prices ARE higher, but not sure how much higher.

[ScottinCrimea]

     I have to second everything that was written.  It's a great summation.  If you are a man, don't even suggest mixing the vodka with juice.  As a woman you can get away with it though.  My wife will often do this to limit the amount that she drinks.  One rule is that the person who opens the bottle is responsible for that bottle and keeping the glasses filled.  One thing I learned to do is after the first 3-4 shots, I will only drink maybe half my glass each time.  Either way they will just fill it to the top again with no comment.  Once the bottle is empty, it is considered bad luck to leave it on the table, so put it on the floor under the table, even if you are in a restaurant or nightclub if the waiter doesn't remove it promptly.
     It fails to mention that there is a heirarchy of alcohol that should not be violated.  It goes roughly beer-wine-champaigne-vodka-cognac.  This means that once you have had a drink of vodka, you can't go back to beer or wine, and once you have drunk cognac, you're pretty much stuck with cognac for the evening.  You may get away with a beer chaser after a shot of vodka, but that's about it.  They believe that your hangover wil be much worse if you vary from this, for example if you alternate beer and vodka.
     Never offer a drink of vodka without something to eat after the shot, even if it's only a slice of bread.  Preferably something salty.  If you have to take 10 minutes to run to the market for something, do it.
     Where I got into trouble was when our friends from Istanbul brought some Raki for us to drink.  It's anise flavored similar to Sambuca but not as thick and is typically mixed 50/50 with water and ice.  It has a slow onset so it can fool you.  I was drinking it and feeling nothing so I just kept on drinking.  When it finally hit, it knocked me on my ass.  From what I hear, I missed a great time.

[Kuna]

OK...  dumb question coming up...

 

Aren't the girls turned off if you get drunk?  I understand the family and/or friends might want to get you drunk but I would have thought you'd get a big red mark from the girls if you do???

I imagine it'd be less of an issue once you're IN a relationship but I thought the "custom" of getting drunk should be avoided if at all possible.

OK,  now you can TELL I'm a newbie!   

Kuna

[KenC]

OK...  dumb question coming up...

 

Aren't the girls turned off if you get drunk?  I understand the family and/or friends might want to get you drunk but I would have thought you'd get a big red mark from the girls if you do???

I imagine it'd be less of an issue once you're IN a relationship but I thought the "custom" of getting drunk should be avoided if at all possible.

OK,  now you can TELL I'm a newbie!   

Kuna

The answer is yes, no and it depends.  I think RW are put off my total non-drinkers.  They don't understand it.  Even when a RW lists herself as a non-drinker she usually still will drink a cocktail or wine.  Drinking is part of their culture like it or not.  Russians like to party dude.  If you and she get caught up in the spirit of the night and get hammered, she probably will accept it.  You don't want to be a party pooper now, do you?  Now if you get toasted night after night, she probably will check you off her list because she can find a guy like that in her hometown.

I had the pleasure of sharing New Years dinner with Lena and her Mom on my first trip.  Shots of vodka flowed through out the dinner.  Russians believe that vodka helps digestion and it is the norm for a party type dinner.  They also think that vodka has some medicinal purposes like when the wifey and MIL wanted to rub it on my back to cure broncitus but that is another story!

On my second trip, Lena and I took her parents to a dinner at a nice restaurant.  Between the four of us we went through 5 or 6 of the small bottles of vodka.  Russians are not lightweights.  It wasn't a drunken event either.  Impress your girl and place the empty bottle on the floor as the Russian do.  (Some voodoo horsesh!t about an empty bottle on the table being bad luck)  It is like the original post says, eat a little, drink a little, more drink, more eats continue until finished. (And keep your girl's glass full at all times.  They would die of thirst rather than to fill their own glass)

I have more than a few tales to tell regarding drinking with the Russians.  But then of course I am Russian too.
KenC

[Jet]

I think RW are put off my total non-drinkers.  They don't understand it. 

Before meeting Liliya for the first time, I learned a little bit about her Ex and his problems with alcohol. While in London for 2 weeks we didn't drink at all, not a drop. Like Kuna, I was under the mistaken impression this would impress her, and she could see that I was nothing like her Ex the drunk. (As a rule, I can pretty much take or leave alcohol, doesn't really matter either way.)

Well it did leave an impression    - after being back at our respective homes for a week, she finally worked up the courage to ask which life threatening affliction I was trying to keep her from finding out about! Just like all the culture books say, only folks that have something seriously wrong with them, don't drink AT ALL. She was much happier to see that I drank responsibly on my second trip, than not at all on my first. Just as on the forums, in the absence of information they'll immediately immagine the worst case scenario 

And keep your girl's glass full at all times.  They would die of thirst rather than to fill their own glass

This has also been my experience... If they have to ask, you have already f**ked up.

[Bruce]

For the most part agree, but I do not like the raw eggs part, yuk  !

[Kuna]

Hmmm...  thanks for the info Ken and Jet.  I'm Australian...  Love a beer at a barbie, down at the Jazz Club on a Sunday arvo, etc etc...  still (unfortunately do the "club" thing from time to time, but am strictly opposed to illicit drugs)...  

Looking for less party and more family in future, but would be uncomfortable with a partner totally opposed to drink. 

I've talked to the girls about drinking but I guess with all the stories I've heard about the problems with booze in FSU it does give the impression that you should expect some radical ideas.  I guess the only radical ideas are the ones we dream up ourselves huh!

I suppose drinking was one of those inevitable questions to ask in here before before departure.

Kuna

[Shadow]

I do have to comment on the juice thing..
While not mixing it, instead of eating something you can also drink a sip of juice after a shot of vodka. This has equal effect.
Regarding drinking at the party, the first time Mila was very worried and intent on me not getting drunk. I countered this by drinking about half the amount of the Russian men. The next time she already understood that I can take a good amount even if I am not used to drink a lot. I managed to keep up with her friends and outdo her father (though brandy, not vodka). This with just a slight effect, like most would have after a couple of beers. And no hangover whatsoever.

The trick is to copy the habits of the Russians, as they are used to drink this. And when in doubt about your own capacity, there is no harm in drinking less than the hosts. They will exuse you for being foreigner and not used to Russian amounts of drinking.

[ConnerVT]

Shadow makes some valid points.  I believe it has to do with the differences in 'drinking culture' between Americans, Europeans, and Eastern Europeans.

In America, the primary purpose (for many) is to get intoxicated.  In European (and Eastern Europe), the primary purpose is much more social.

In the USA, just take a look at college campuses (and even before).  How many young adults (OK, teenagers) put down a few drinks before heading to the bars/nightclubs, in order to bet a "buzz" and avoid the high cost of drinks?  Drinking games.  Beer bongs, shooting beers, beer funnels, drinking games, all is a culture (or mindset) that associates drinking as a competition to see who can consume the most alcohol and still stay standing. 

It is known that it isn't acceptable behavior.  If you are underage, you know it is wrong to steal liqour from your folks, to ask strangers to buy beer at the local 7-Eleven store, to drag a keg to some remote place in the woods for a party, or to throw the drunken bash at your parents house while they are away on vacation.  But I'll wager most of the (Western) men here could share stories about these things from their (some distant) past.

Eastern Europe's culture (IRT alcohol) seems to be a bit different.  The lure is more social, not the drunken end result.  It is part of daily culture, as well as a part of celebration.  Alcohol is consumed primarily with meals, and a quality Russian celebration is measured by how much food is on the table, not by how many empty bottles of vodka are underneath it.  Even when you see young men hanging out in parks or beside a kiosk on the corner, they are usually sharing food along with the beer or vodka they are drinking.

I had an interesting opportunity to examine the difference in these two cultures.  I have attended large celebrations in Russia (weddings, anniversary, and birthday parties) with 30 or more people.  I also was best man at my good friend's wedding here in the US, where the bride (and many of the guests) were Russian, many attending their first US wedding reception.

The wedding reception was typical for the US -- Open bar for about 2 hours, then a cash bar.  A few announcements, a champagne toast, a buffet dinner, cake, and a band afterwards.  It was well run, but most of the Russian guests seemed a bit lost.  Too little food, too much hard drinking on the onset.  One toast?  That's it?  Most of the Russian guests made a polite exit before the band had taken their first break.  They just didn't understand the culture difference.  Or they did, and decided they didn't care to participate.

Shadow (and our other European members) -- It seems to me that Western Europe is moving more towards the American culture, IRT alcohol use.  That the culture used to be more similar to Russia, but now is feeling a stronger influence from American culture.  Just as Russia is feeling the cultural influence of Europe.  Is this your impressions as well?

[KenC]

Conner,
Very interesting and informative post!  Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

I had the pleasure of having a nice sit down dinner with my in laws and my adult children last summer at my home.  It was very nice to expose my kids to how a Russian family would enjoy a dinner celebration.   In the end everyone was so much closer and knowledgable about each other that it warmed my heart.

Len and I also had a great experience of "hosting" a dinner for my son and a few of his frat bros at the Red Square restaurant in Vegas.  We did it "Russian style" and Lena ordered an oversized bottle of vodka from the outset.  The boy's eyes got as big as saucer's when she started pouring the shots and making toasts.  It is a time I will never forget and I am sure they will not too.
KenC

[jb]

When a Russian tells you they are a non-drinker, they really just mean they don't get sh!tfaced everyday.  I've met no Russians who won't have a glass of wine with a meal or have a few drinks on special days.  As stated above, (Conner, I think, said it), it's a culture thing.

[Shadow]

Shadow (and our other European members) -- It seems to me that Western Europe is moving more towards the American culture, IRT alcohol use.  That the culture used to be more similar to Russia, but now is feeling a stronger influence from American culture.  Just as Russia is feeling the cultural influence of Europe.  Is this your impressions as well?

Unfortunately you are right. The young generation cares more about getting drunk than about the taste. ( Oh man I am getting old  ). The vodka you can buy in Holland is well... bad as it is used mostly to mix not to drink pure.
I was taught to taste even the strongest spirits and can tell the difference between vodka or other spirits of different brands. But I see that this art is getting lost in favour of getting drunk quickly.

[55North]

It is generally agreed that in Europe, there is a divide between the UK and the continent.  In the UK, the tradition is very similar to the US variant, as apart from the traditions of European 'cafe society', even though wine and vodka have become 'poisons' of choice and not consumed in the correct manner, thus ensuring drunkeness and a decline in civil society.
  
There are signs that the youth of the 'continent' and of the FSU are moving towards the beer-based vertical drinking culture of the UK (which is sad, I think) (even though it is my birthright).  
  
When in Kyiv,  I greatly enjoy their home-based drinking culture, which I find very civilised, but I also know that my contacts also enjoy a visit to an Irish bar for some serious beer-drinking (without going to extremes).

[ConnerVT]

I've met no Russians who won't have a glass of wine with a meal or have a few drinks on special days. 

Then you must meet my FIL.  Teetotaler, by personal choice.  Gave up drinking some years ago, but will gladly refill your glass and enjoy the camaraderie.

[Gator]

Shadow,

But you have genever!  My ex-wife had it one sip at a time for a long, long time on a cold evening in The Hague.  She fell out of her chair, one is really inebriated if they can not sit in a chair.   

[Stirlitz]

I do not drink vodka. If I am stronlgly suggested to drink, I can tell them to drop dead. But when people drink I always tell them about the simple rule: drink twice as much plain water with it and you would be okay.

[ConnerVT]

...She fell out of her chair, one is really inebriated if they can not sit in a chair.   

That's why I always stand at the bar.  Once you fall over, you know you have had enough.