MIL and FIL make it to NY

[Bruce]

OK, figured I'd start a bit of a thread on MIL and FIL' first trip to the USA from Tver of course through my eyes.  I wrote the standard letter to help them get a visa and they paid about $100 to use a service to help them fill out the paperwork get an appointment with the embassy in Moscow etc.  FIL can only be here a bit more than two weeks due to his work schedule.  MIL gets to stay until the middle of February.  Where should I start................I have a small two family townhouse with the first floor having two bedrooms, one bathroom a driveway and one car garage and the upstairs having two bedrooms / two bathrooms.  I recently had the kitchen redone except for the oak cabinets which still can use a touch-up / restaining.  At one point I rented out the first floor but we decided we wanted more space, and it is good for our child and when relatives visit.  Even with property taxes more than doubling under Mayor Bloomberg our home serves a few benefits for us.  It enables us to be close to Brighton where there is a nice assortment of Russian entertainment and food from the FSU, it enables our child to play on a playground with FSU children, it is more comfortable for my wife, it is close to my work (though I still would prefer a house in the suburbs and a commute) and gives me more time not travelling in a car unless I want to.  Most importantly, I believe the Russian area of Brooklyn, NY is the closest a girl from a moderate to small city in Russia has to a seamless transition to life in the USA.  So far it has worked well.  We are happily married and have a beautiful fourteen month old daughter who is a joy, but a tremendous amount of work (which has us mutually agreeing to holding off on a second for a while certainly). 

I got them tickets on Delta direct and their flight together was supposed to arrive at 3:35 or so.  Instead it was at the gat at 4:15 along with a flight from the Dominican Republic as well as Aerosvit from Kiev.  By 5:15 pm they both came through, tired and exasperated.  They went from the foreigners line to a second assigned line behind a family from the DR with six children.  MIL and FIL were not impressed and this was the first time I heard FIL say the equivaltent of damn ------- having too many children and gumming up the works etc.  Still, they were glad to see me and I drove them home to a treat for my wife as well as them (my potatoes, liver and onions) as well as snacks, cakes and drinks etc. 

Unfortunately for me, unless what I am fixing is living I tend to have two thumbs.  We live a few blocks accross the belt parkway separating Sheepshed Bay from Brighton Beach.  The townhouse we have still goes for 600K plus with all the residence inflation so our area has either houses stuffed with immigrants.So, when they got to our house.  To be continued............

[Cold Warrior]

We are happily married and have a beautiful fourteen month old daughter who is a joy

Glad to hear, congrats Bruce.

[Bruce]

Thanks, CW.  Anyway, by the second day MIL as well as FIL were doing everything they possibly could with our daughter (walks, feeding, diapers / toilet training) that they could which was and is a big help to both of us.  MIL also took over the majority of the cooking activities which is a plus for my wife.  I happen to prefer my wife's cooking but my wife and everybody else prefers the MIL so, its fine with me.  By the second day MIL decided to move around furniture with my wife.  MIL was the director and FIL and I stood in as movers.  One breakfront from upstairs to downstairs.  One chest of drawers from upstairs to downstairs.  Chairs and couches moved accross the room etc.  It took half a day but I agree the moves are for the better.  MIL bought me a beautiful red rose painting I had wanted when I was in Tver last time as well as a small birch tree painting.  She is very adept at getting permission to take paintings out of Russia, which really makes my wife happy.  We get beautiful Russian nature or floral paintings which as I have mentioned previously are one of the best presents you can get from Russia if you can get the artwork out, which is work but not a problem if they are recent.  MIL also got me a bag of chocholate trufels that I like from Russia as well as a ton of candy sweets my wife likes, a few Charodeika cakes we love and lots of gifts for my relatives.  MIL and FIL love our house, our region and the food, both in the American supermarkets as well as the Russian area.  MIL also brought really nice caviar for the new year.  We had a lot of fun celebrating in New Year at our home.  We watched all the Russian programs (muscial programs) on cable and watched the NY times square ball comming down and quickly went to sleep.  They became a bit homesick there and were happier celebrating it earlier ie. its new year in Russia now etc.!  I actually have many champagnes and believe it or not Andre was the hit because it is a sweet sparkling wine, more like the typical Russian champagne.  Christmas is a hoe hummer to them, though FIL is more of a believer.  Old communist education dies hard in our family.  New Years is their holiday.  Oh, I almost forgot, my wife made a turkey.  First time they ate it and they absolutely loved it!  One night we went to Rockefeller Center to see the tree.  They enjoyed it.  We went on the trip by subway so it was a bit much of a culture shock to see all the weirdos plus people from all over the world you see in NY.   It was way too crowded which was a hassle as well.

     I think MIL and FIL are a bit too timid while taking care of our daughter.  I like to challenge her a bit more (playgorund etc.), but better safe than sorry, so no problem there.   

     FIL really is impressed with American roads (NYC roads suck compared with most of the rest of the country by the way), how clean, new and nice the cars are here.  He even likes my aging Honda Accord.   

     FIL got new sneakers here which he liked.  Mom liked going to Macy's and buying a nice new heavy blanket for back home.  We went to Kohl's one day and got some clothing for them both.  They really liked the quality and prices for clothing. 

They both are very upset there is no snow.  No snow for new year was disappointing to them.   They really liked the Christmas tree in my brother's house, his American wife and enjoyed seeing my brother's family and house.  He has a beautiful house in a nice area in the Jersey suburbs with a cute 2 1/2 year old son and 8 month old daughter.  They likened his house to a nice dacha then a real home, which they believe should be in the city.  They can not understand how Americans like a nice house in the woods and like to drive everywhere etc.  Collective mentality dies a hard death and you tend to like what you are used to, though they really enjoy the Brooklyn townhouse space as opposed to apartment life.  Manhattan (stacks upon stacks of ant cubicles to them) life is not appealing to them. 

They enjoyed the windows at Macy's which really are beautiful but hated the Macy's area ie. minorities are really starting to disgust them, but I suppose it is par for the course.  They liked the upper East side of Manhattan because it was newer, cleaner, had virtually no minorities acting like animals around ie. the minorities there were dressed well, not trying to beg for dollars, sucker people be an eyesore etc. Central park was great.  We really enjoyed ourselves there.  They hated NY pretzels.  I thought they would like them.

They absolutely hated Chinatown in Manhattan as well as the food.  Yes Chinatown smells and is rather tight so I figured they would not like that part, but I thought they would like Chinese food.  At least they did not get sick from the Chinese food. 

This past Sunday it took me 45 minutes to find a spot to park on the street for a second outing in Central park.  They realized now how I told them how much easier it is for me when we take the subway in.  Still, it did not take long to go into and out of Manhattan for us so the 45 minutes it took to get in to the city and back home was better than the 1:15 sitting on the train for them.  When we went by train we had no problems, though I suppose they must have encountered some culture shock.  FIL commented how ugly the women are in NY compared with Tver / Russia. 

They really enjoy interacting with all the Russian speaking grandma's and grandpa's in the park.  They really enjoy all the Russian language in and around Brighton.   FIL likes to wake up early and jog on the boardwalk completely around it.  They have been in the Atlantic as well with the polar bears (the people who like to swim in the winter).  FIL hails from the White sea so he thinks its summer here. 

This week they'll meet my folks.  MIL is already cooking..............I think they'll do their best to get along though I know they come from different worlds with different assumptions.  My mom is quite agreeable so it'll be ok. 

Sorry if I repeated some thoughts but the gist is, roads, foods, shopping are great in the USA.  Our place and area is fine.  Sights in and around NYC are great over all as well. 

[KenC]

Bruce,
Thanks for sharing.  It all sounds familiar to my In Law's visits (which I love).  I did the whole Thanksgiving feast thing for them on their last trip here and they loved it too.  Just FYI, with every new visit, your In Laws will feel more and more comfortable and there will be less shock and even more fun.  Mine now have developed a taste of San Diego and know what they want to do and what they do not want to do.  Having them here is always great for me.  My MIL cooks and cleans constantly and my FIL is always putzing in the yard or the garage and my home never looks as good as when they are here.  They try to make themselves useful, I guess.

I never thought of the dynamics of you having Brighton Beach so close either.  That is so cool for you.
KenC

[Bruce]

Ken C, you are so right.  FIL ended up doing all the work he could around the house.  He fixed a sliding door, took two other inside doors off the hinges so he could shave the bottom of them down by hand to optimize closing.  He was most impressed with cars, roads, the orderliness of the drivers, if you could believe it or not.  They just love the food.  They feel our daughter is eating like a real princess ie. fresh organic rasperies, strawberries, blueberries in the middle of winter.  They are just so impressed with the fruits, vegetables, meats, TURKEY etc.  All in all FIL had a really good trip - he even got to his gate in 25 minutes at JFK.  MIL will return later. 

[Michelangelo]

Bruce! I'm really enjoying your report....thanks so much for sharing.

I'm already dreading the day when her mother comes to visit....so I can see from your story what to expect    LOL

BTW- Vk agrees that our roads are the best thing America has to offer :-)