Hey guys, new guy here with concerns

[funkola]

I just happened upon this site yesterday and have been reading a lot of posts. I got a huge red flag when I did a search on Anastasiaweb.com It seems some of you don't think highly of them. I would love to hear some more detailed info other than "they are a scam site" etc. Would some of you relate your experiences? I am worried because I have been using them for almost 2 years and would hate to think I have been suckered all of that time. I am about 3 months away from my first trip to Ukraine to meet a girl I have been writing who lives in Cherkasy. Anyone ever been to that city?

[BillyB]

Welcome Funkola,

I've been reading forums for over two years and I'll describe some men's experiences to you.

One guy visited a woman and she didn't remember hardly anything pertaining to the letters he wrote her. The person who wrote him was probably Igor, the employee of the month at the agency.

One guy listed a profile at a large dating site called freepersonals.ru and got one response in a week. He listed the same profile at AWeb and got 400 responses in a week. Somebody at the agency is pumping out those letters wholesale to see if he'll bite.

Lots of hookers, pro daters, and green card girls at AWeb's socials/tours.

One guy wrote to a woman for a month but decided to stop corresponding with her. A week later she writes him a letter introducing herself to him. He wrote back asking if she remembered him and she or the employee at the agency writing the letters on her behalf couldn't remember the correspondence they had with the man the previous week.

One agency owner came forth and said Aweb wouldn't list any more of his girls until they write more. Aweb won't do business with small agencies not up to their program in high letter output.

In my two+ years reading, no man has come forth and announced he's married to a girl he met through Aweb although one recently announced he's engaged after spending $600 a month corresponding with many women there. Still, the odds suck and there are much better places to achieve success for much less money.

Funkola, simply put, you got scammed for two years. Everytime you paid to open a letter from a woman or send a letter to a woman that is actually a man in an agency office, you got scammed.

Try to get full contact info out of these women including phone numbers and call often leaving the agency out of it. Do lots of reading here to educate yourself on the good, the bad, and the ugly. Not many women would write you for more than a few months. Women don't like keyboard romeos that write forever without visiting. But Aweb will cater to men who want to live a fantasy.

Aweb fooled you once, shame on them. Now you know the real deal, if they fool you twice, shame on you.

Since you are now committed to going to Ukraine to meet a girl, get on the phone with her even if you need to pay the expensive fees Aweb charges to be your middleman. If she has little idea who you are, what you written, or what she's written to you, then forget about her and Aweb and move on because you have grown attached to a woman based on what someone else has written her behalf and she would be very much a total stranger to you. No sense visiting a total stranger having to depend on luck for compatibility.

[funkola]

Thanks BillyB for your response. I gotta tell you it wasn't a good read! Like all men I have been very alert (I hope) to any suspicious behavior when writing women. I wrote the girl I am going to see for about 4 months and then stopped writing her because I became disinterested for no particular reason. Several months later I contacted her again and asked if she would consider communicating with me again. She said she would like that. So we have been writing off and on for over a year. One time she hinted at me helping her get Internet access but she never came right out with it and dropped the subject when I hedged. Other than that she has never asked me for anything. I have sent her gifts 5 times in the past and I always had a picture taken of the moment. I never used Anastasia service for the gifts and never used the same company twice. Other than a slight weight gain I have noticed over the many months (she has reached a massive 117 pounds ), she always looks the same. She has snail mailed me pictures of herself and her son. I have snailed her 3 different times with cards etc. I voluntarily wired her some money for Christmas and she was shocked. Today being Valentines Day I sent her a gift and will be getting a video of it by email. All told I have invested about $1000 with her in over a years time.

But, there have been some curious moments. She told me her father was in the Soviet Army (retired) but she had no idea what his job was. She is not estranged from her parents, she lives with them. How could she not know her fathers job he retired from. (she is 36, not some teenage bimbo)

Also, several times I have asked her questions, nothing really important, and she never responded. After I thought about this long and hard I realized that I myself do the same thing at times. So should I be so hard on her in that case?

And like you mentioned, I have wondered why she has been so patient with me. We have written a long time. Is she really a patient lady or is she making money for the agency? Do the girls get a percentage of that $6 I pay for a letter translation? Or am I just cynical? There are other minor events but none so important I can even remember them. And how many of those events are the fault of the translator I wonder? Some of the translations are funny they are so bad.

You have given me much to think about regarding Anastasia. Thanks man.

[rickjames]

 I'm using Anastasiaweb right now. I'm only $400 bucks in the hole, but I've been testing all of my correspondents in different ways. Some of them show up on other sites, possibly because their pictures or profiles were sold to others or affiliate sites. One girl told me that I wasn't realistic to drive a rental car from Donetsk to Kharkov. I then told her that I won a few amateur rally car club races, and I have driven across Canada twice, and she was out of her mind to think I couldn't take such a small drive. Well, the next letter from her was crazy. She gave me hell, called me haughty and ambitious and tried to spit in my virtual face. She also told me there was no such thing as car rentals in Ukraine.
 That was definitely a real woman, not an agency employee. But probably not a real Ukrainian.
I started a separate profile with them, with absolutely no information. Not even a picture. Then my "trustworthy" female friend sent it a letter one day, after claiming that it is I that she only wanted to talk to. I asked her about it, and she knew nothing about it. When I opened it, it was the exact same letter she sent me when she sent one to my real profile (It's cut-and-paste).
 Another girl claimed to translate her own letters, and I believed it, until I received a perfectly-written, lengthy, spelling mistake-free letter from her. It definitely wasn't her. I stopped writing her, and a few weeks later she sends me a letter, asking if I still remember her and that she misses me. A real girl talks to hundreds of men, and never looks back at someone that abandons them.
 I asked some of the girls about their experiences with the agency, and many say that when men visit,  they don't treat the girls very nice. One was a model, and said that a few guys came to visit her, but never called her. She took a train into Mariupol, and the guys never showed.
 This too must have been a real woman, as she was real emotional.
 I don't know about that site, as there is some things that make it believable, but it still has points that you will doubt. You will get real addresses if you ask the girls nicely.
 I am cutting the rope with them anyway. Too much is too much.

 I can't bash Anastasiaweb just yet, as I have not traveled to Ukraine yet to verify. They seemed like an upstanding company, and that's why I chose them. This forum here at RWD clouded my optimism, and I am sure that is a good thing.

 If you communicate through snail mail with your woman, she's obviously real. There is no profit involved from that form of communication, and she uses it.

 P.S. If you possess any sort of concern or doubt, you will be labeled as cynical by others anyway. but the girls will still write you regardless! they must be old fashioned, with family values!!!!! WOW!

[BillyB]

funkola,

Personally, I think you invested too much on a person you've never met but since she snail mailed you some pics, she's probably a real woman that's interested in you. You wrote to the woman for only 4 months and invested $1000 in communicating with her plus gifts. Of course she's not going to drop you.

You already have plans to see her so go see her but have some backup ladies in her city just in case things don't work out. Go to bride.ru and they sell contact info for a flat monthly fee without you having to write through an agency. If things work out between her and you, tell her to use an internet cafe to write you instead of an agency but rely on phone calls more than letters for communication. Tell her to get a free @mail.ru e-mail account. If she needs translation, there is a free electronic translator she could use on here e-mail account to translate your letters and her letters before sending them to you. A person working at the internet cafe could help her navigate and sign up at the mail.ru site.

The things I don't like is that she hasn't answered all your questions and hinted to help her with internet access. You seem like a generous guy, the last thing you need is a gold digger to exploit you. Make sure you find a woman deserving of your generosity. Use your big head and be smart about who you're dealing with. Some of these women will eat your heart out.

[Vaughn]

She has snail mailed me pictures of herself and her son.

The fact that she's taken the time to actually send you photos (and with them, written correspondence, I assume?) speaks positively about her sincerity. I'm curious if you two have spent any time on the telephone yet? BillyB brings up some good points in his assessment - as I've had zero experience with Anastasia, the consensus describes a letter factory. My advice is to keep your expectations reasonable, exercise a viable backup plan, and by all means get yourself over there and immerse in the culture.

Just for fun, I googled Cherkassy in Cyrillic (Черкассы) and found a few interesting sites, this one offers English language links to maps, weather, and real estate/rental deals...

http://www.apartment.2mcl.com/ENG/eng1.html

And a very comprehensive city photogallery, although the text is in Russian, check out the hundreds of photos at:

http://www.city.ck.ua/gallery/

Funkola, welcome to RWD.

Vaughn  

[funkola]

BillyB, I wrote the girl for 4 months initially. Over all we have been writing for over a year. Over 60 emails each way.

She did send me a hand written letter and photos of her and her son. She also included her son in one of the photos I had made of her with some flowers I sent her. She also likes to paint (seems they all do) and she sent me a print of a painting she made of herself from a picture when she was a little girl.

She has been unemployed most of the time I have known her. She is a substitute teacher at the moment. I am more worried about Anastasia scamming me then her as an individual doing it.

I really appreciate your thoughts and opinions guys!

Thanks for the links Vaughn.

[prince_alfie]

I suggest freepersonals.ru where you have more control over the process of finding a gal. Honestly, any organization which filters out a lot isn't a good sign ... A-web seems more like R roulette to me honestly.

Catering to well...

[jb]

Funkola,

Forgive me for saying so, but isn't 2 years and 3 months a long time to string out a Pen Pal romance?  Is there some reason you haven't made a trip before now?  And why are you waiting another 4 months?   Either this woman interests you, or she doesn't.  You seem satisfied she's real, and you seem to think she has genuine interest in you.  How many times have you called her on the phone?  How good is her English?  Where in the FSU does she live?  How hard is going to be to visit her?  Do you really know anything about her at all?

Personally I think you've contributed enough to the wealth of A-Web, it's time to get on your pony and ride.

[funkola]

Thanks for responding jb! I guess I am not being clear in my posts or something. I have not been writing her for 2 years 3 months. We have written each other for a little over a year with a period when we didn't write for a few months. So less than a year combined. I am going to see her in three months, not four. As I said she lives in Cherkasy. Her English is not good but her sons is understandable..... As for the amount of time I am taking.... I would rather be safe than sorry. No wife is more appealing than the wrong wife. Also there is more to my life than emailing women. I have other things I would like to get in order before I go to Ukraine. I am not one to rush into things and I told her that a long time ago. There are a lot of red flags that can pop up through email given enough time. To me that is better than having them pop up later in person. I use the long email period as a filtering device.

Bu then again maybe I have been talking to some hairy fairy sending me pictures of his sister!

[jb]

Funkola,

I guess what I don't understand is; why the two year delay?

For discussion purposes we will assume you are writing to a real woman.  I truly believe the only winner in a two year Pen-Pal romance is the agency which is getting paid by the letter.  Very rarely does the relationship work out to become something serious if the interest isn't there to hop on a plane within a 6 month period of time.  Most serious women, that is, women who are serious about finding a mate, would have dropped you like a bad habit and moved on to greener pastures a long time ago.  I don't know of any RWs who would enjoy being toyed with for over a year.  The fact that you were using A-Web makes the picture look even more less than ideal.

We would have to know a great deal more about you, i.e., your situation, how long divorced, how much savings and disposable income you can devote to this endeavor, how much free time you can spend in the FSU during the courtship, etc., before we can offer any advice to you.  At this point we don't even know if you own a passport. 

Please understand our dilemma, you could be as rich as Rockefeller, and have all the free time in the world, but are just lazy, or on the other hand, you could be recently divorced, paying a chunk of child support and alimony to a greedy ex-wife, living paycheck-to-paycheck in a rented one bedroom apartment, and have neither the money or time to make the necessary trips.
 
We have seen both extremes here over the years.

[KenC]

Thanks for responding jb! I guess I am not being clear in my posts or something. I have not been writing her for 2 years 3 months. We have written each other for a little over a year with a period when we didn't write for a few months. So less than a year combined. I am going to see her in three months, not four. As I said she lives in Cherkasy. Her English is not good but her sons is understandable..... As for the amount of time I am taking.... I would rather be safe than sorry. No wife is more appealing than the wrong wife. Also there is more to my life than emailing women. I have other things I would like to get in order before I go to Ukraine. I am not one to rush into things and I told her that a long time ago. There are a lot of red flags that can pop up through email given enough time. To me that is better than having them pop up later in person. I use the long email period as a filtering device.

Bu then again maybe I have been talking to some hairy fairy sending me pictures of his sister!

Funkola,
There is a limit to what you can learn via email and you have certainly passed that point months ago.  I know there is a certain amount of paranoia that you have had to deal with but I am questioning your interest in this woman.  I guess, I just don't understand how a man can be sincerely into a woman and not make more progress than you over the period of time you have been communicating.  Either you are the most patient man in the world, or the most cautious, or you're not very motivated to move past pen pal status.  Care to explain?

I talked to my now wife for a month and a half over the phone and got my butt over to meet her! I simply could not, not go to meet her. Our relationship was just at a stage where I had to take the next step.  What you will learn about each other in a few days together will dwarf what you have learned year+ correspondence.  Hell, you might learn more about your compatibility in the first few hours together.  I hope it all works out for you.
KenC

[Pike]

Regarding Cherkassy, Kuna was just recently there, although only for a short time.  Read his trip report.

As far as this gal not answering some of your questions, this is par for the course with respect to RW and UW.  It seems to be part of the culture there that is somewhat different than ours.

Unlike some of the others, I don't think you have waited too long for a visit, but I do think you are going to be in deep do do by going to visit only one woman.  These meetings have a way of blowing up in the first 10 minutes.  Cast a much, much wider net for your first visit.

[Shadow]

From your posts I have distilled the following profile.
- 36 year old mostly unemployed teacher with a son.
- she is writing to you for over one year, did not mind to pick up correspondence
- you have talked to her through her son (by phone ?)
- You have her home address, as the two of you exchanged snail mail.

first of all, realise that what you have got is a pen pal. Nothing more, nothing less. There is no way a woman can consider you a serious candidate for marriage until you have met face to face. Given her father being retired and she unemployed, the family income would be extremely low,
Regarding the job of her father, she probably does not want to say it. Do not worry about this. People in the FSU know that Americans can lood oddly to Soviet Army officers so will not reveal a lot.

If you are writing to other women (which you have not mentioned) be sure to keep their address as backup.
You seem a nice person, do not be surprised if a short time before the meeting she will cancel it.

[Turboguy]

I have to agree with Shadow.   Be prepaired for your meeting to be cancelled at the last minute.   Don't be disappointed if it happens, just chalk it up to a learing experience.   Have a back up plan with agencies or other women you have contacted just in case.  Perhaps you will get lucky and it will go exactly as you hope and you will come back with the woman of your dreams.   Just be mentally and strategically prepaired for something to go wrong.  We are saying this in a big part because of the agency you are using and things we have heard happening to others.    We all hope it goes well and we all are on your side.  Good luck.

[funkola]

Thanks guys. I have read every word you have posted three times. My main question was the reputation of anastasia and I can't find anyone hear with a positive remark about them. That is a bummer. I wish I had found this site sooner. It doesn't take much for my cynicism to turn to paranoia and I think that has happened.

So the big question is................. what if any agencies are reputable for the most part?

[prince_alfie]

Thanks guys. I have read every word you have posted three times. My main question was the reputation of anastasia and I can't find anyone hear with a positive remark about them. That is a bummer. I wish I had found this site sooner. It doesn't take much for my cynicism to turn to paranoia and I think that has happened.

So the big question is................. what if any agencies are reputable for the most part?

Ditch the agencies and post yourself on freepersonals.ru . You will not regret it.
Honestly it will save you much heartbreak and money by going the personals route.

[funkola]

I am going to take your advice prince.

[prince_alfie]

I am going to take your advice prince.

No problem. The most important thing is to take control of what you want to do. The less cooks, the best for the kitchen.

Freepersonals has been working out very well with me so far. I am happy with my result.

[groovlstk]

I am going to take your advice prince.

Just FYI: DIVERSIFY, guy. Don't put all your eggs in one basket, use a variety of ways to meet FSU women.

I used the freeps for awhile and found mostly scammers and women who were receiving so many letters from prospective guys that they couldn't keep up with the correspondence. So either they stopped writing to me because they were overwhelmed (or they were disgusted at the sheer number of perverts asking them for naked photos) or I got tired of their generic responses and ditched them. I did ultimately meet a few in person, with mixed results (which is par for the course no matter what method(s) you use).

And before you start taking advice from Prince Alfie, understand that despite his good intentions he has never met a Freepersonals woman in person OR been to the FSU.

[Nando]

I agree with Groovstlk completely.
The girls in Freepersonals just vanish without trace, so to find a good prospect you need to write to a lot of them.
I think going to concentrate in an agency or city to try meeting women is not the best way. I have tried this without great sucess.
You can also try brides.ru, as Billyb would say, it is not expensive and you get a ton of contacts. Them you can write them and just see the ones who fill your criteria. Talking with them a lot by phone would eliminate the ones who are very busy or have already a boyfriend.
A guy who is used to date women can easily spot the ones who are interested in communicating with you.
After selecting three or four go to their home time and visit them.
If one is in St. Pete and the other is in Odessa well you are going to travel a lot, but if you are serious about the process, just do it!

I'm a newbie dating FSU women I know, but the process is similar to dating women in any country.

[Turboguy]

As far as a few agencies that are the ones I would suggest as being as reputable as you can find, Elena's Models has been good for many including myself.   Kiev Connctions, First Dream, Cindy Agency,  IDI Bridge, Lifetime Parners, Kherson Girls, Tver Angels, Magic Date are a few.   There are many more.   I would follow the advice of using more than one approach.   I would write some gals though free personals, Elena's,  Merry Dating and others and use some agenices such as those I listed above when you are in a particular city.  Try ICU as well.  I have no experience with it but Groov found his gal there and it is free.

[Bruno]

Try ICU as well.

http://www.icq.com/people/?dating=1

[funkola]

I probed Elena's models for a while in the past but I thought it was low class to charge a guy to see additional pictures of the women. Just doesn't seem right to force a guy to join just to see if he is attracted to a women. I have seen pictures before where from one to the next the girl looks very different due to air brushing. One girl I saw on afa went from smooth neck skin in one photo to rough wrinkled skin in a candid photo. Caused by sun tanning I would guess.

[prince_alfie]

I probed Elena's models for a while in the past but I thought it was low class to charge a guy to see additional pictures of the women. Just doesn't seem right to force a guy to join just to see if he is attracted to a women. I have seen pictures before where from one to the next the girl looks very different due to air brushing. One girl I saw on afa went from smooth neck skin in one photo to rough wrinkled skin in a candid photo. Caused by sun tanning I would guess.

I can recommend to you Volga Girls and Kiev Connections websites for modest fees and good connections.