Any suggestions on guiding this guy?

[BC]

Maxx

OK I will rephrase:
Men in US are not desperate for women,they are just desperate for good women.
Hope this satisfies

I think this applies to maybe 10% of men seeking RW.  90% are indeed desperate for ANY woman.

[mspanky]

It's really easy for an average woman to get guys in the U.S.  Probably why a lot of Foreign woman discover they can upgrade the second their plane lands here. I knew a 29 year old guy who worked in NJ as a stockbroker. Apparently one of the new secretaries was a Chinese girl off the boat from China who had married an old American guy . They had a small child. He was in love with the girl and she would tell him about things going on in the marriage. The guy was nice looking and could probably get many dates. But he wanted to be her knight in shinning armor.

   I don't know how things ended up as he left the company and moved away with her(before she even got a divorce). But I thought he was nuts . Just shows the desperation of some AM.

[Zhena]

Zhenna,
how do you know this guy is a millionaire?  I hear that term used a lot by RW that don't understand what it means.  Usually someone with that much money would never allow their credit to be screwed up by making their wife commit fraud.

DKMM,I know what is a millionaire. I know also he is cos she signed up a prenup and there it was said how much money does he have. Hes incredibly cheap.

[Zhena]

I still didn't get an answer from boys 
Just MHO
Of course living there now she could find a man in "normal" way, there are plenty of them in America ( I guess)  But.... in reality in vast majority cases people could pick up their "other half" only from their own circle - their friends, co-workers , friends of family. I don't see how a circle of single working mom ( new immigrant in addition) could be wide enough for  finding a husband
So... I don't know statistic but suspect MOB in Ukraine (excuse me for terming - no intention to offence somebody here, just a terming ) has more chances to get a husband 
 I think you did get FSu girl of course can work like a nurse but somehow people from FSU are not "famous" with such occupations where great patient with eternal smile at a face ( so to say)  are in demand  Some position of accounter would be better choice

I am not a guy for certain,but I live here for some time so I see the number of single men in comparing to Ukraine. If she will work in the hospital,she will have some circle of co-workers. And who told you the reople from FSU *not famous* with such occupations?

[Zhena]

Gwad poor men in America,so desprate for women

You wont believe how not spoilt men are here. They marry the women who wouldnt have any chance in FSU (american women),and she has the kids. And the guy is very decent. My husband said many good guys just dont have the time to hunt for the best women so they marry one near them who is far not the best.

[Zhena]

It's really easy for an average woman to get guys in the U.S.  Probably why a lot of Foreign woman discover they can upgrade the second their plane lands here. I knew a 29 year old guy who worked in NJ as a stockbroker. Apparently one of the new secretaries was a Chinese girl off the boat from China who had married an old American guy . They had a small child. He was in love with the girl and she would tell him about things going on in the marriage. The guy was nice looking and could probably get many dates. But he wanted to be her knight in shinning armor.

   I don't know how things ended up as he left the company and moved away with her(before she even got a divorce). But I thought he was nuts . Just shows the desperation of some AM.

I believe that absolutely. A man who never saw a really feminine woman can get crazy for the one he will meet finally. I dont want to say there are no beautifl women in america. Here is alot! But the character...

[mspanky]

You wont believe how not spoilt men are here. They marry the women who wouldnt have any chance in FSU (american women),and she has the kids. And the guy is very decent. My husband said many good guys just dont have the time to hunt for the best women so they marry one near them who is far not the best.

 Zhena,

 Your right about that. I know guys who are making well over 100 grand a year and in great shape here who are married to women no RM would look at. Then these guys spoil their wives are faithful and good fathers. Meanwhile women spends all of their money.

   There is a show called OC housewives or something where they have some 46 year old woman with 3 or 4 kids who is marrying some millionaire her age who just bought her a top of the line Mercedes that they only made 100 of. A 6 Carat Diamond ring and al sort of other stuff. Now how crazy is that?

 On the show, there is another so-so looking latin girl 26 ,living in a 6,000 Sqaure foot mansion, her millionaire 36 year old boyfriend does not want her to work,she drives a Mercedes and can spend an unlimited amout of money. He puppy dogs after her like a loser even though he is better looking than her.He's tall and pretty fit. If the guy dumped her tomorrow he could replace her with 100 women who are better looking and treat him 100x better. If she left him tomorrow, she would never pick up a guy close to this guy. But he gives her the upper hand. I watch this show and feel like choking the guys..

[Muj]

ms,
Keep in mind the typical viewer of that show is not watching hockey or TBS movies.  The show is for some unkempt couch bound women.  I call this the "Rosie effect."  If the show portrays any less then the viewership decreases.

[Voyageur]

mspanky,

We have recently seen this show also (it is on Bravo). I can unfortunately confirm that does not depict either Western man or Western women in a good light  . 

[mspanky]

Yep, The guys are wimpy and the women controlling and fake. It does depict many Americans badly. But it's true. How many guys will simply say "Yes dear","Whatever you want dear". Guys here have lost their balls. They let the women lead them like dogs.

   On the show Slade who is a millionaire ,tall and good looking lets his sub-par girlfriend do whatever she wants and lets her run the relationship. Why is he such a wimp? I'm sure he had to be pretty aggresive in life to get to where he's at. But she is allowed unlimited spending, just like the other ugly(but nice body) blond. Her fiance gives her a 6 carat canary diamond after knowing her 6 months along with a brand new Mercedes. The girl is 46 with 3 or 4 kids for crying out loud!!

[Muj]

Its a parody .

[Muj]

Well an update, not so rosy .  She called my wife after a large argument that results in a visit from the police.  She ended up with all the bruises of course .  She wrote in his name as her visa sponser at the hospital and he reacted.  We were away for a few days so dont know all the details.

[I/O]

Yeah........!!  Well I guess that was always going to happen.  Sad reflection on some of the men who go looking in the FSU.  You don't have to be there long to spot them. 

I/O

[DKMM]

You could probably have him whacked for about 2 grand...

[BillyB]

  We were away for a few days so dont know all the details.

I'd like to hear the details before taking sides. If there were bruises evident, the husband would be taken to jail for at least one night since the police were involved. During the argument, did she remain quiet as a timid woman does or did she do her fair share of screaming?

[Gator]

During the argument, did she remain quiet as a timid woman does or did she do her fair share of screaming?

Billy, this comes across in a strange way.  It suggests that if a man screams in an argument and a woman screams in return, the man has a license to strike her.   This is how many men go to jail and deservedly so.  ???

[William3rd]

She needs to go for the shelter and DV orders. Another VAWA poster child. Sooo predictable. . . .

[Muj]

Billy, this comes across in a strange way.  It suggests that if a man screams in an argument and a woman screams in return, the man has a license to strike her.   This is how many men go to jail and deservedly so.  ???

Gator,
You are right on.  Men and women can argue vocally but a physical argument usually results in the smallest with the most injuries, if you wish to consider this from a non gender point of view.  C'mon BB, who cares who started the disagreement or yelled loudest or even hit first?  She's 8.5 months pregnant and deserves the respect of her husband and any man or woman.  She's very vulnerable.
W3, he visited the police and paid a fine.  Later the police obliged in his removal for 5 days.

[ScottinCrimea]

It's another one of those cases where he loves his money more than his wife.  Did anyone NOT see this coming?

[BillyB]

Gator, Muj, I'm not defending the man or implying a man has a license to hit a screaming woman but I know many people are capable of provoking a fight to get the reaction they need. Have you ever seen a man in a fight, who has little money, dare another man, who has money, to hit him? His motive is to sue for money, not to settle a disagreement with the winner being the last man standing. As I mentioned earlier in this thread, I wonder what this woman's motive is? She never introduced her husband to her family or friends. That is much a red flag as if a man never tells his family and friends about his fiancee/wife. Anybody keeping a secret to others about one of the most important people their life, a spouse/fiancee, has issues or an agenda.

Muj, you don't seem surprised that her husband hit her. I know it was easy for people to tell this pregnant woman to go against her husband's wish in scamming for free medical. You know this situation better than me. If you suspected the man to be violent, I sincerely hope you didn't assist in putting a pregnant woman in harms way by escalating the situation with advice to tell the truth on the medical forms. That is a choice the pregnant woman has to make on her own if she fears her husband.

Muj, what do you mean when you said the husband visit the police to pay a fine. He's supposed to spend the night in jail, not visit the police voluntarily. Did he turn himself in or did she call the cops after the fight? Also why is she 8.5 months pregnant and now filling out hospital forms? Didn't she have any regular checkups throughout the pregnancy from the doctor that is to deliver the baby? If so, that should be the time when forms need to be filled out to figure out who's paying for medical bills.

Like William said, she needs to go to a shelter. If there were bruises inflicted on her from her husband, then she shouldn't be around him anymore. The marriage is over and I won't sympathize for the woman if she decides to continue the relationship with the man who beats her.  IMBRA will not stop a man like this from beating a woman again or marrying again. Just as the law states felons can't vote, Men convicted of REAL DV shouldn't be allowed to marry.

[Muj]

BillyB,
As mentioned earlier, we probably don't know all facts.  Actually, from the start, I knew that any contribution by me to improve the situation was to talk to him.   I never advised her in any way, so far. 
We are concerned with her welfare.  I also was open to talking to him and helping educate him rather than watch a situation grow worse.
He stayed in jail for the night.
I am guessing the hospital was continuing to pursue payment of bills.  His name was already on her visa as her sponsor.

[MaxxumUSA]

BillyB,
As mentioned earlier, we probably don't know all facts.  Actually, from the start, I knew that any contribution by me to improve the situation was to talk to him.   I never advised her in any way, so far. 
We are concerned with her welfare.  I also was open to talking to him and helping educate him rather than watch a situation grow worse.
He stayed in jail for the night.
I am guessing the hospital was continuing to pursue payment of bills.  His name was already on her visa as her sponsor.

Whoever this man is he needs a little lesson.  I've heard enough to judge him and I don't care what the hell he thinks his side of the story is.

I use the sister thing.  I think what would I do if this woman was my sister.  Well...  My answer is pretty simple.  We would have a man to man talk.  Talk only the first time.  And if there was a second time he would know the consequences, because they were spelled out to him VERY clearly.  And they ain't pretty.

For the record my sister is married.  Her husband pulled some crap like this ONE time about 4 years ago.  My sister called me.  Within a few hours her and the children were out of the house.  A few hours later her husband came home and I was waiting for him.  We had our discussion and I explained the consequences.  A few days later my sister returned home.  Since our conversation my sister has never had a problem with him.

Unfortunately this woman does not have a brother here to (try to) protect her.  Does she have someone else that can step in?  More importantly would she even WANT someone to step in and protect her.  Some people are gluttons for punishment and chaos.  While I can judge the man based on what I have heard, I cannot judge the sanity of this woman.

Just my thoughts.  I'm sitting here in Russia today and my GF is on the phone with some friend of hers.

OH...  By the way I proposed yesterday.    We had a great evening celebrating with friends!

[ScottinCrimea]

Congratulations Maxxum!  If you were celebrating, I'm assuming she said yes.  :kissing:

If you and youor friends had a true Russian celebration, I'm surprised you're even out of bed yet, yet alone able to write a clear post.

[MaxxumUSA]

Congratulations Maxxum!  If you were celebrating, I'm assuming she said yes.  :kissing:

If you and youor friends had a true Russian celebration, I'm surprised you're even out of bed yet, yet alone able to write a clear post.

We got out of bed after 12 noon I think.    Heads were both pounding until about 4 pm.  We are still a bit slow and it's almost 8 pm.  Thanks scott.

[Bruno]

Joe is a idiot who accuse his wife to make fault when he is responsible...

Joe even went so far as to express his disappointment that Elen produces a girl rather than a boy.

Any people with some basic college know that men have the chromosome XY and women have the chromosome XX... gamete ( sperm cell ) from male can be X or Y... the ovum from female are always X...

So, it is the man who is responsible for the sex of the child... Joe don't need to be disappointed that his wife produce a girl since he is the only responsible of this...

Sorry, i have not time to comment the bad behaviour of Joe but i advice these who hope the other side of story that in these case, it is not needed... He accuse his wife from "mistake" where he is responsible ( see example up )... He push is wife to lie to the hospital... once she choose to be honest, he hurt her, a pregnant woman... no excuses at all... it is individual like him who give the munition at the "femininazi" for shoot at the normal men ( several of us... i hope ).