New member here,please help need some advice this is getting crazy!

[virginiajoe]

Hi there i'm Joseph a new member from Virgina Beach,VA.I do need some advice as this is getting crazy for me! Back in January I joined Yahoo personals for the first time and this scammer who I thought was legit then contacted me,with no profile of course,her name was Marina Smyrnvoa,even her last name is fake,it should be spelled Smirnova.I fell hard for her letters,she was from Biysk,Siberia,Altai Province,I was amazed at how a woman from such a far remote place could even dream up such a scam.We e-mailed each other every day,I just came out of a bad relationship a year ago with a woman here from Norway,she couldn't take being away from her family and I couldn't move to Oslo so she choose to go back there,maybe it was mistake,but I can't go back to change the past.I was vulnurable,that's what they prey on,now I know! 4 weeks later she said she needed the money for visa,airfare to come to the Washington DC airport,I started getting curious and did a search on google on Biysk,and sure enough there was a post about her on there.I posted a message on there and 3 different guys responed to me and even 1 of the sent her $400.I e-mailed here and told her to basically take a long walk off the Brooklyn Bridge!That was the last of Marina,but I do thank her for bringing me closer to a country which I knew little about.She told me truthfully man things about Russia that I would have not known.I almost felt sorry for her,living in such a cold,polluted place in Siberia as she put it,if she would have been honest,I probably would have helped her.Who knows maybe she's living it up in Sochi now at the beach with all the money she's made scamming.
After that as I always was I am hooked on Russian women.I am a romantic guy and most women around here think that is for teens,they just want to get drunk,screw here in Va Beach,if that is what you are looking for then fine,but I am a 32 year old mature man who wants more than just the wild fling.
I joined a few personals sites,even met a rich business woman from Moscow,she is kind of boring,never mentions love or stuff like that,yet she responds to my questions,and she has visited the US before,she sent me the pictures,she will be in NY in 2 weeks.Should I mention to her Irina,that I am looking for a partner woman to love,or would that offend her? As I said before,she never gets all mushy like the scammers do.Money does not seem to be a issue for her,I have heard about those rich Moscowites.She says she is visiting NY,Miami,I did invite her here to VA,she dosent'seem that excited though,who knows? Who wouldn't want a guide to visit Washington DC,she says she has not been there yet.There is another a girl a met on a kinky web site,she wants me to come to Moscow to visit and she promises to take me to all the crazy night clubs and show me a good time,she has also been here to America,she sent me pictures of her in Seattle,this is way to weird! She also plans to come back to America again.She is a college student in Moscow.And I also met another one,and she is even more so of a trip.I have known here since Feb right after my first scammer Marina asked me for money.This girl has said all the right things again,dosen't want the money,even knows about the scams.We have talked on the telephone 5 times,she called me to my cell phone,I am allowed calls from Russia on my cell.This girl is the best,very sweet,she is divorced,still lives with her parents 27,she is just amazing,her name is Anna Darianova in Vologod,I can send you her picture if you would like.I told her I am saving to visit Russia next spring and she is very excited about it.Most scammers do not like the idea of you coming to Russia,that defeats their whole puropose.She said she could only write to me once a week because of the costs of the internet,I sent her a small amount of money and she thanked me,I might have been a sucker who knows,but $50 can buy you some internet cafe time in Russia.She also mentions she has hot sex thoughts of me at night,is it right for a Russian woman to talk about sex in a e-mail? I told her when I was in New York City last week I thought about her also!
I don't know what to think about these women anymore to be honest with you,I noticed NYC is the place to meet Euro women here in the US if you are looking,even though most of them are tourists.Please give me some advice and don't be afraid to give me criticism if you think I am wrong for talking to more than just 1 Russian woman,it's just I don't know who to trust anymore.
               Thanks for listening.

[Maxx]

Get a hold of "Son of Clyde" on this board. He has attended a RW/AM gathering in Virgina/DC or Maryland (where he is from). He said besides the many couples, there were at least a dozen young attractive/beautiful Russian single women there. They were there on business or as tourists. It would save you allot of trouble and money to meet RW in your home State that go through the hassle of letters/visit procedure. Plus if you do meet a lady this way you may not have to experience the long separations and INS hassles as she can visit you between visits to her. Many, many pluses here. When I am ready to do this again I may give this a try.

Maxx

 

[Vaughn]

VirginiaJoe wrote:

This girl is the best,very sweet,she is divorced,still lives with her parents 27,she is just amazing,her name is Anna Darianova in Vologod,I can send you her picture if you would like.

Does her picture resemble this one?
http://agencyscams.com/Photos/Photos2314.jpg

Joe, slow down a bit, you're post sounds breathless. If you're a true romantic, stay away from NYC - the women there will eat you alive. Try Maxx's advice for beginners - contact Son of Clyde, chat a while. Be very wary of being contacted first - it's worked for some, but the odds are not in your favor. Quit sending money to anyone you haven't met yet. Listen to others here. You'll get some blunt yet valuable advice.

Vaughn

[virginiajoe]

I guess I can take that with a grain of salt,in this brutal military town I guess I can use this advice,I am not much of a bar kind of a guy.I guess NYC was a bit much since I am not used to be around that many beautiful Euro woman,thanks you guys for your advice,as I am a newbie.I do feel I have a lot to offer to a euro/russian woman,maybe should have moved to Oslo for my woman but that is old news that I can't do anything about anymore.I wish there was I can only blame myself for mistakes that maybe were made.
I would appreciate any advice for people in the VA.Thanks for your time.

[virginiajoe]

Actually,it dosen't,it is a picture from the world war II veterans celberation with her cousin and grandfather,it is great! I know,be careful of these agency model pictures,Marina's pictures'were like that,she was a beauty and I fell for her,but everyone has a first time! The good thing is I got a education about the great Russian Federation.Her other pictues are quite amatuer but I still still like them,she apologizes that she can't write more than what she does.Our phone calls were amazing,she speaks decent english,it really made me excited,maybe that was her point,I don't know.I will be careful before I send her anymore money though,she was very greatful though.How do you know if she is not a scammer and just deseprate,hell doctors make what $200 over there,a part time employee here makes more than that.
Thanks again for your advice,most of the people around here think I am out of my mind for talking to a Russian women,the weird thing is,there are 2 Russian men working at my firm and they think it is great that I talk to Russian woman,it is all too confusing to me!!!

[BC]

Well welcome VirginiaJoe!

Sure be careful but don't get overly paranoid or invest big in the emotional department until you get a chance to meet.  Letters n pics may be nice intro's but imho it all really starts face to face.

It's great that she can speak english and you can call from time to time. Big pluses.

A home phone number can help verify some basic details like address, who's living there etc in a very unobtrusive way if you have scam doubts. Isn't 100% proof but if discrepancies pop up you will at least be aware.

Next spring is a long way off though. This is not a cheap venture and takes a LOT of time away from work etc, so take a good look at cost/time related threads here and elsewhere to see if it's doable beforehand. Don't dive off the high board unless you are prepared and know how deep the waters are.

[anono]

hello joe, BC gave you a good start on good advice. read the board, read the trip reports. do NOT send money to a lady you have not met. i would not send them even $50 for the internet cafe. $50 here can be a 1/4 of a months salary. you'd be surprised at the work a R/UW will do for a $30 handbag. 

i have sent travel expenses to women but only after i verify things and they work through an agency and i have good communication. send only enough for travel expenses, only if you have to. sometimes i just tell them (if they can buy the ticket themselves), i will reimburse them when they arrive.

[chuckinwdc]

Hi Virginia Joe,

It sounds like you are REALLY excited about the Russian women, as you should be.   But, my suggestion is to take a breath and take it slow.

Don't start sending money to women you have never met. If you have a long-term relationship with a woman, it's okay to send a little money to pay her Internet costs. But otherwise, you're going to be wasting your hard-earned money. Be wary of any Russian woman who begins expressing love or sending you "hot" messages right away.

My suggestion is to try to find a half dozen ladies that you can have a correspondence with for a couple of months. After a while, narrow the field to two or three and visit them. Some men narrow the field to one, and then visit only this one (that's what I did).

Now, keep in mind that you can find a really wonderful woman in the former Soviet Union, but the process is going to be expensive. The search, depending on whether you use agencies and buy addresses, will be expensive. The courtship, if you make telephone calls on a regular basis, will be expensive. The trips to Russia (notice I used the plural -- I would certainly advise more than one trip) are going to be expensive. You have to take a hard look at your finances and decide whether a long-distance search and courtship is feasible for you.

There's a guy I know in Powhatan, Va., which I think is close to you, who recently married his Russian soulmate. I'm sure he will be happy to help guide you. I'll send you his email address privately.

Good luck, and feel free to ask lots of questions.

Chuck and Veronica in Reston, Va.

[Donna_Pedro]

My advice would be as following:

 

"1 lb. beefsteak, with
1 pt. bitter beer
every 6 hours.
1 ten-mile walk every morning.
1 bed at 11 sharp every night.
And don't stuff up your head with things you don't understand."

c  Jerome K. Jerome "three men in a boat".

 

[Leslie]

Donna,

RWLMAO  !!!

You must post here more often!

Joe,

Building a sucessful marriage with a RW is WAY more difficult than it would be with an AW.  I have done this but had I known how difficult it would be when I started out I would have taken Donna's advice...

 

 

 

[virginiajoe]

Thanks for the advice,Donna you live in Moscow? I will follow your recipe! Bitter beer,don't know about that though! I understand how difficult it can be to be in a relationship with a Russian woman.But my past relationships have been anything but easy,nothing really suprises me anymore to be honest.I can imagine,dealing with the embassys,visas,travel costs can be a bit stressful,but that's to be expected.
I am not the kind of guy who has given up on AW,it's just i'm looking for something different.To be honest with you I am attracted to Euro woman,I like their style,accent.I also wouldn't mind meeting woman from countries like Sweden,Holland,Czech,France,Belgium,Netherlands.
I will take it slow and talk with some of the other members from my home state Virginia.Thanks again for all the great advice.

[Jet]

I can imagine,dealing with the embassys,visas,travel costs can be a bit stressful,but that's to be expected.

And that's the EASIEST part

[Son of Clyde]

Hi Virginia Joe,

I think Chuck would be very helpful. He is a very nice guy and was at the picnic I attended 2 weeks ago.

From what I could see there were singles, families, middle aged people and Russian American couples. This would be a good choice to join one of the groups representated at the picnic.

Seems that the church group would be an ideal way to meet nice Russian people and it is where you might meet a few single women. 

I'm sure Chuck or I can lead you in the right direction.

I had a great time at the picnic and came home very excited i might have discovered a social network for my future wife and her son.

Don't trust Yahoo singles, if you want to meet someone decent contact Jack or I can suggest some legitimate agencies you can trust.

[jb]

Virginiajoe,

Just a small hint, the very first thing you need to do is remove all ads from those internet matchmakers, and trash every contact you've made thus far.  Those women all usually have an agenda with only your wallet as the outstanding player on the stage.  Besides, you need to be in control of whom, and where, you decide to meet and court. I think it is also a good idea have a good look at yourself before venturing into the MOB arena, figure out what you really want, how much you can afford, and proceed with a plan.  Going at this helter-skelter is a good way to waste time, money, and fail.

Regardless of what you will read, there's nothing wrong with Moscovichkas, there are many fine, beautiful, unspoiled women living in Moscow, just as there are in Kyiv, and or any other major city in the FSU.  I would advise against striking up an internet romance with any woman from Lugansk, which is a Ukrainian city that seems to  have made scamming dumb Americans a cottage industry.

Get cozy with the idea that you will probably need to rely upon an agency for a place to stay and 3rd party translation, as well as introductions to ladies while you are in country.  If you are smart you will prejudge your criteria, what qualities you want in a mate, and do not let a pretty face deter or sidetrack you.  

When starting out it's maybe a good idea to pick a place where to start.  Writing to women is difficult at best, but if you decide to go that route you don't want your prospects scattered over 10 time zones, which is possible in Russia if you had one g/f in Moscow and another in Vladivostok.  It's better to concentrate your attention to a single area.  Also a consideration is the ease with which you can travel to and from.  It's pretty much a straight shot into Moscow, St Pete, or Kyiv from most major European cities, other places may require an extra day or two of travel.  If limited vacation time is a factor this may be an important consideration.

Whatever you decide to do, welcome to the rollercoaster.

[Son of Clyde]

I fell in love with two very young Russian girls who never asked for money.

I thought at the time it was true love because I was lonely. It was an adventure going to meet them. I was shot down both times. I cannot tell you how much it hurts when the woman who once said she loved you with all her heart looks at you for 30 seconds and her face changes and she never wants to be alone with you. She would not stay with me and every day she had her girlfriend with her. Seems her girlfriend was her backup plan. It made me feel worthless, like I was nothing.

I was lucky not to be scammed and to find two decent 20 something women. They were just not interested in me. Neither saw it as a scam because they spent time with me, just not quality time. It was like spending time with my niece.

After coming home and feeling like a total loser I tried a different approach. To meet a woman with maturity and substance. If you do your homework and join a good agency or search locally you may be surprised to see there are very good ladies who will not take you for your money.

I'm being this honest because I have met the right person and I can see how an innocent person can get hurt.

It took me 2 years to get it right. 

[anono]

I would advise against striking up an internet romance with any woman from Lugansk, which is a Ukrainian city that seems to have made scamming dumb Americans a cottage industry.

this is absolutely true. on the other hand, it is a goldmine of untapped potential. when we rolled into town on the bus on the one tour i went on with jack, never before had we seen so many ladies, with so many short miniskirts almost showing asscheeks. there are so many women in lugansk  and they are fighting over each other for any available men worth dating.

jb is correct, but i think it is mainly limited to the internet. jack can tell you more about lugansk. there are so many ladies that he has to have two parties or at least another informal one so the ladies that did not make the first party can attend.

just stay away from those on the internet.

 

[GregfromGa]

I can imagine,dealing with the embassys,visas,travel costs can be a bit stressful,but that's to be expected.

And that's the EASIEST part [/quote]Not thats focking funny. Dealing with those guys is like a Sunday stroll in the park on a waem sunny day compared to actually sharing your living space with one of these people.

[chuckinwdc]

[user=130]Son of Clyde[/user] wrote:

I fell in love with two very young Russian girls who never asked for money.

I thought at the time it was true love because I was lonely. It was an adventure going to meet them. I was shot down both times. I cannot tell you how much it hurts when the woman who once said she loved you with all her heart looks at you for 30 seconds and her face changes and she never wants to be alone with you. She would not stay with me and every day she had her girlfriend with her. Seems her girlfriend was her backup plan. It made me feel worthless, like I was nothing.

I was lucky not to be scammed and to find two decent 20 something women. They were just not interested in me. Neither saw it as a scam because they spent time with me, just not quality time. It was like spending time with my niece.

After coming home and feeling like a total loser I tried a different approach. To meet a woman with maturity and substance. If you do your homework and join a good agency or search locally you may be surprised to see there are very good ladies who will not take you for your money.

I'm being this honest because I have met the right person and I can see how an innocent person can get hurt.

It took me 2 years to get it right. 

Son of Clyde alludes to two very good points that I'd like to emphasize:

1st, that chemistry is an essential element of a successful relationship, and you can't determine if there's chemistry until the two of you meet -- no matter how well the correspondence phase goes.

2nd, that one should pursue woman who you believe will make a good wife. It's easy to get over excited, having these hot 19- and 20-year olds answering your letters. I know it was for me. But after a while, I settled down and begin looking for someone who I felt would be more stable and mature.

A third point that I'd like to make is to try to have fun, even if it doesn't work out on the first trip. Remember, you're going to be traveling to a part of the world that is completely different from what you're most likely used to, and that you may not have a lot of opportunities to do that again. Look around, do some sightseeing, enjoy your trip as much as possible, even if you come back and have to try again.

Good luck!

Chuck

[Photo Guy]

Chuck,
My 7 days in Kyiv were kinda overwhelming. I was doing too much, while doing it in a sleep-walking, jet-lagged stupor. I was dating an amazing woman, playing the tourist, and trying to learn Russian, while being aware of possible muggers. My plate was full. I had the time of a lifetime. My interpreter was initially interested in my schedule for the week. She was also our tour guide. I told her I had no schedule, but would like to do some specific sightseeing, like Lavra monastery.
So I went with the flow and enjoyed the sights and sounds. I have many digital photos that I still need to process. I was playing 'the tourist' and investigating this fine creature named Larisa. Looking back, I wished I had made it to the Opera or the Ballet, which I've heard are of very high quality. I enjoyed my trip as much as possible.
I liked it enough - enough to consider buying real estate there. I was lucky to have some variety: Larisa-no English, Tanya, some English, Natalie- Interpreter,  Tanya's friend Viktor- little English, his Russian friend Archueng- some English.  It was a good look at Larisa's circle, although I have not met her parents yet - not this trip.  

[MandM]

[user=134]Photo Guy[/user] wrote:

his Russian friend Archueng

Doug,

Are you sure he was Russian? I've never heard this name before.  Sounds Chinese to me!

[chuckinwdc]

[user=134]Photo Guy[/user] wrote:

Chuck,
My 7 days in Kyiv were kinda overwhelming. I was doing too much, while doing it in a sleep-walking, jet-lagged stupor. I was dating an amazing woman, playing the tourist, and trying to learn Russian, while being aware of possible muggers. My plate was full. I had the time of a lifetime. My interpreter was initially interested in my schedule for the week. She was also our tour guide. I told her I had no schedule, but would like to do some specific sightseeing, like Lavra monastery.
So I went with the flow and enjoyed the sights and sounds. I have many digital photos that I still need to process. I was playing 'the tourist' and investigating this fine creature named Larisa. Looking back, I wished I had made it to the Opera or the Ballet, which I've heard are of very high quality. I enjoyed my trip as much as possible.
[snip]

That's the way to do it, Photoguy! You've just had the experience of a lifetime -- congratulations! You'll remember this trip for the rest of your life, and maybe found the woman of your dreams as well. Is that a good deal, or what?!

Kyiv is a beautiful city. I loved it, and have many happy memories from my two trips there. I visited the monastery too. Incredible sights! Took a boat ride on the river too. Unfortunately, I didn't see the opera or ballet.

When I visited Ukraine for the first time, I was hoping for the best but if things didn't work out between my lady and me, I was prepared to turn from suitor to tourist. Thankfully, it did work out, so I got to be both a successful suitor and a happy tourist.


Congratulations on a great trip, and good luck with your lady.

Here's a picture of me standing in Independence Square, in front of the Indepencence Monument, which has at its top a gilded sculpture of "Mother Ukraine":

[anono]

 while being aware of possible muggers.

i don't know why or how this myth of muggers got started. i felt in more danger at o'hare airport.

in either december or january there was an attack on american for the first time anyone including the newspapers can remember. some guy was walking with his UW and a couple other people and he was jumped by some skinheads out of nowhere on andrewsky. it was racially motivated. they didn't take a dime.

in the more than a year i have spent here, i have not witnessed one act of violence.

when i was in moscow, the lady was showing me the locks on the bank vault door to the flat. i asked her why she was so concerned about making me feel safe. she told me the last american was so afraid he never left the flat!!   i'm sure the RW if he met any, were thinking "what an alpha"!   i told her i am not afraid of anything. what is there to fear? i walk the streets at 3 am. doesn't bother me in the least. i keep my eyes open and use common sense. which, of course, isn't very common.

i wish americans would stop acting so 'fraidy cat when they come over here.  it's less dangerous than most places anywhere in the usa.

just keep your eyes open like you would anywhere. walk with purpose, do not look like a target. keep a liitle money in one pocket and a little in the other. in the highly unlikely event you are the first american mugged here in who knows how long, give them the small money out of one pocket. i usually never carry more than $300 total both pockets at any given time and i only carry that much if i anticipate changing some money. there are money exchanges and ATM's everywhere. people are making transactions all the time, i see no fear in these people nor do i feel it.

relax and enjoy this wonderful city.

[virginiajoe]

Wow that was a good picture.Kyiv is also spelled Kiev right? That tower reminds me of the one in St.Petersburg,very beautiful and it looks like the weather was fantastic.Most people here it seems don't realize how beautfiul the cities over there are.Some of my relatives,say you should go to France or Italk,England,and yes those are nice countries,but for my first visit to Europe,I am going to Russia and Germany.I think it will be a great experience and hopefully I can meet the right one.
Thanks again for the advice,don't worry I want send anyone money again.

[chuckinwdc]

Wow that was a good picture.Kyiv is also spelled Kiev right? That tower reminds me of the one in St.Petersburg,very beautiful and it looks like the weather was fantastic.Most people here it seems don't realize how beautfiul the cities over there are.

Kyiv is the Ukrainian version of the name, while Kiev is the Russian version.  If you search out a lady in Ukraine to marry, you'll eventually find how confusing all the name variations can be. My wife, for example, had three different spellings of her last name: Russian tranlated to English; Ukrainian translated to English; and Russian tranlated to Ukrainian translated to English. Yikes!

Kyiv is an extraordinarily beautiful city, IMO. Odessa is also very beautiful, but not quite as well maintained as the capital city. Frankly, Odessa is my favorite for a lot of reasons (not the least of which that's where my wife was born, and I visited the city five times).

Here's a picture of my then fiancee and me in front of Odessa's Opera and Ballet Theatre, which was modeled after the one in Vienna, Austria:

[Bruno]

I am not the kind of guy who has given up on AW,it's just i'm looking for something different.To be honest with you I am attracted to Euro woman,I like their style,accent.I also wouldn't mind meeting woman from countries like Sweden,Holland,Czech,France,Belgium,Netherlands.

Maybe you can search a russian woman who is already living in Europa... if you take a look at http://freepersonals.ru/index.php , you can find some living in Germany, France, Belgium, holland... and same in US... it is a free site... of maybe at http://www.holostyak.com/ ( Russian/America ) with several ads from US.

But usually, they are "second hand" woman, who have a misluck marriage with foreigner in the baggage... but this not mean that these woman are bad...

And of course, on these site, you have a lot of russian woman living in Russia but be beware that free site have more scammer... but they are low level and enough easy to detect...

Choice a RW already living in europe of US have some advantage, they can easily have a visum and visit you... of you can visit her... but they are more difficult to impress and charm because they are already living in Western contry for sometime...