The causes of being Scammed

[Kuna]

I've been wondering what affects your chances of getting scammed???

- Pure bad luck;

- Lack of reality and understanding;

- Looking for the wrong things to start with.

When you think of it the scammers letters are SO OBVIOUS... some are well disguised... but when a man falls for one of these scams what made him think anything was real in the beginning.

I reckon many want to believe the agency hype about desperate women dying to marry an American man but that in itself should be a warning sign for any man considering marriage...

What do you think? What makes a man susceptible to being scammed?

[Wayne B]

Kuna, I guess that many men fall for the photos of a beautiful woman.....and as time goes by for many, their infatuation with these photos leads to blindness. Then when she/he pops the question of needing some money for one reason or another.....The man feels compelled to help these beautiful photos in their time of need.....and sends the money

[I/O]

I've been wondering what affects your chances of getting scammed???

IMO it comes down to one of two simple factors almost every time.  Guys thinking with the wrong head or not thinking at all.

I/O

[catzenmouse]

What do you think? What makes a man susceptible to being scammed?

Naivety

Lack of Initiative to Learn

Living in Fantasy

Stupidity

[Dan C.]

  Lack of knowledge or being naive are one reason.  I was scammed out of a couple of hundred dollars last year by one website/agency when I first started this.  I did not know there are scammers in the FSU, or companies that will scam you.  I wised up pretty quickly, did some research, and found RWD which certainly helped.  Now I am more aware and would be much harder to scam. 

[Kuna]

Yeah...  I've seen a few threads recently that focus on the scamming process and it made me think about those that get caught...

I think it's more than "falling in love with a photo" because something has to be going on in a guys head to do that... He knows it's not real but he is denying reality.

Some may be lonely and desperate...

Some deluded by the agency hype thinking that it MUST be real that this gorgeous FSUW would fall so madly an completely for him... ("They've poverty stricken and there are no good men... he has American citizenship so she MUST want him)

If they've contacted the scammer first (which may not happen often anyway) may be he is looking for the wrong thing to start with...

I guess it comes back to that thread a while ago where there was discussion on "Logic versus emotion"...  For some reason these men become emotionally engaged WAY too early...  and if the truth be known there's probably genuine women that become emotionally engaged too early too...

We know the scammers exist and I guess there will also always be men out there who are easy targets. let's hope the men find RWD first...


DanC...  I think being scammed by an agency is a whole different thing.  I reckon a guy could be genuine in his search BUT simply unaware of the unscrupulous operates in the business.  In these cases naivety is obviously the main factor.  Sorry to hear you got caught but Id suggest MANY men get caught by agencies...

[Rvrwind]

I've been wondering what affects your chances of getting scammed???

Summed up in one word - STUPIDITY!!!

[IAmZon]

Kuna had a great idea a couple of months back: starting a thread "Desperate or NOT Desperate enough".   The stupidity factor is in the balance of those two poles I AM SURE. 

And it is not a stationary thing. 

[KenC]

Nice first post JR!

Kuna,
My answer to:

What do you think? What makes a man susceptible to being scammed?

From what I have seen from many years on these forums I would say two factors: #1 Thinking he knows everything (or knows better than others much more experienced) #2 Thinking that his situation is "different."  These two traits usually go hand in hand with guys heading for a train wreck.
KenC

[Lily]

4.  I'd guess less than 1% of all the girls that are attractive on websites are looking for marriage with a Western man.

Do you think that the unattractive women on the websites mostly look for the Western men? 

[ScottinCrimea]

JR makes some interesting and very valid points about the idea of being clever in the FSU.  It's a unique way of thinking that is hard for the western mind to comprehend.  In the FSU, often it is necessary to be clever to survive.  It's a concept I have a hard time with, being that I am an AM.  They often differentiate being clever from being deceiptful, while we in the West perceive them as one and the same.  One of those cases where I understand but don't necessarily agree.

Men are scammed because the scammers play on their egos, giving them hope that they are attractive to some gorgeous woman for whatever reason.  It is a fantasy that they want to prolong, sometimes at all costs.  Their logical mind tells them that it can't be true but they want to believe it so much that it overrides their logic.  Most men who have been scammed, if you ask them, will tell you that they saw the red flags but didn't want to risk losing their fantasy on the very slight chance that it might be real.  When confronted by others about the illogical nature of their situation, want desperately to believe that they are unique.  They want to feel special and the scammers know how to make them feel this way.  The white knight effect also plays a significant role in this.

[Jazzyclassy]

   5.  "Cleaver" - to a FSU person can mean the ability to make money by "unique" means.  To most in the West, Cleaver would mean a con, lies, or illegal.  As one FSU girl told me most US men are dumb because they believe anything.  Why?   Western men are just too honest and wouldn't expect people to lie or con them.            

I agree with most things you said  JR , but it sounded a bit like all Russian women are liars, its not true , our culture does not support lies. Mostly Tricky girls lie , the ones who are hiding something, the ones who are not genuine, sweet lie is a different thing as well , and many girls would better tell the truth either than sweet lie, cos we know that eventually everything which is hidden becomes revealed

Plus men are very desperate to attract girls that is why they switch off their reasonable thinking, they are ready for everything to spend all the money in the wallet in order to be liked by her, they do not realise that they give  the opportunity to be scammed, they should always be careful with money , especially when they meet the girl for the first time, there is no need to rush for an expensive gifts and stuff, oh come on if you can attract her without money and gifts , that means you are a real man , you need nothing to be liked by her, that is the main thing

Guys should always be very careful and first of all try to gain her heart by different methods not money. I mean those guys who from the start count only on their wallet that with the help of it they can move mountains , then they should not even ever complain about being scammed as they  allowed it themselves

Yes many women are tricky and mean , but once again if one meets such women all the time, I guess there is something to think about for him..........

[DKMM]

I know a couple guys who were scammed.  One was just scammed basically because he thought people there were living in desperate poverty (its not 1998 anymore!).

Another had his wife come over, steal his identiy and she fled.  She got picked up in Chicago 2 weeks later and deported...

[Rvrwind]

"Cleaver"

Well JR  "Cleaver" to me means a big knife for cutting meat, (which probably is pretty close to accurate ), 'clever' however is totally different.
Okay, I'll back off of the STUPIDITY comment for the moment, however I think if you were in my shoes you would see it much more clearly. Lets call it "naive",  just to be gentle so we don't hurt anybodies itty bitty feelin's.
Westerners, for the most part, expect the world to be the same everywhere. That peoples moral compasses should all point to the truth & honesty. By jumping in without learning first they soon find that they are not in Kansas anymore. The whole world does not operate or think by western standards. Part of that is naivety, part of it is arrogance & yes, part of it is stupidity.
Ken C. also alluded to two big factors that contribute to a mans downfall.
I still get guys emailing me whining about this or that agency that burned them & you know what, I don't give a rats azz anymore. There is enough information out there on 98% of the agencies that you can pretty much find out anything you want to know about them with a simple Google search. Even when they do find it & do read it they do like our friend XD40 in the BH thread & they still use them, why??? :noidea: Sorry but in my book, that is stupidity.
So maybe I'm a little harsh, & maybe I calls a spade a spade. But nobody can ever say they were not treated fairly by my company, nobody can ever say they were cheated, nobody can ever say they received phony correspondence, nobody can ever say anything bad about my company. Yet I still struggle to keep the doors open, why is that??? When companies like AWeb, BH, CC to name a couple are making small fortunes.
I'll tell you why, because for most men a pretty face & a fantasy are far more important than the hard realities until they get burned however, then all of a sudden they turn to me. I'm dealing with one as I write this. Happens constantly when a little thought, a little smarts & little self control could have saved them a ton of money & a lot of heartache.
Go about it smart & you will never get taken. Think with your little head instead of you big head & you will be taken!!

[acrzybear]

Richard

Why don't you tell us how you really feel?  

[Simoni]

From what I have seen from many years on these forums I would say two factors: #1 Thinking he knows everything (or knows better than others much more experienced) #2 Thinking that his situation is "different."  These two traits usually go hand in hand with guys heading for a train wreck.
KenC

In a similar fashion, as Marina and I walked down karl marx ave yesterday, we were reflecting on some of the newbies at RWD and WHY they fall into scams. 

Or if not obvious scams, believing it when a girls tells them after three days they are in LOVE with the man.  A week later, they are engaged, and we have another one week wonder.

Marina, from the wisdom of the fsu woman, had the same conclusion that KenC did...she says men say

"I'm different.  I'm smarter. I know better that others before me. It won't happen to me..."   To ME...

And the cycle repeats again.

[Gator]

Is this limited to scams before meeting the woman?  Or feeling scammed after meeting the woman? 

IMO, the latter is much more complex.  In this latter case, some men are not good listeners or do not understand women.  The clues are there. 

Also, what  he may consider a scam is perhaps nothing more than the man spending some money on her and she later decides that she does not like him. Happens every day.  Does not make it a scam.  Yet, there are women who under false pretenses will spend/take your money and feel no remorse.  What is interesting, rarely is the amount any more than a trifling sum.

[IAmZon]

What would make a man become sooooo unglued to thing this way ....

Sim worte "Marina, from the wisdom of the fsu woman, had the same conclusion that KenC did...she says men say  "I'm different.  I'm smarter. I know better that others before me. It won't happen to me..."   

TOO DESPARATE!

This is not sober thinking!  This is not the kind of thought process we have in our normal life E-V-E-R.  Three days LOVE ... come on!!!  (Am I the only one who thinks you can't even BEGIN to REALLY know someone for months - many of them, not days?)

[KenC]

What would make a man become sooooo unglued to thing this way ....

Sim worte "Marina, from the wisdom of the fsu woman, had the same conclusion that KenC did...she says men say  "I'm different.  I'm smarter. I know better that others before me. It won't happen to me..."   

TOO DESPARATE!

This is not sober thinking!  This is not the kind of thought process we have in our normal life E-V-E-R.  Three days LOVE ... come on!!!  (Am I the only one who thinks you can't even BEGIN to REALLY know someone for months - many of them, not days?)

No, you're not the only one.

The only downside risk of taking your time is that your fantasy will be exposed as a non-reality.
KenC

[catzenmouse]

"I'm different.  I'm smarter. I know better that others before me. It won't happen to me..."

Added to them not wanting this to happen

The only downside risk of taking your time is that your fantasy will be exposed as a non-reality.

Equals lots of money for scammers, scam agencies, pro daters, GCG's, and gold diggers.

They take that fantasy and wrap you up in it so tight you think it is reality. If there were not so many who live like this then the scammers would not be doing so well.

Actually thinking and paying attention to what is going on around you is quite a bit less than common .

Ken

[Rvrwind]

Richard

Why don't you tell us how you really feel?

Thought I did Corbett, LOL.
I could go on but that would be  , don't see much point in it. Just gives me a headache!!