Need advice for an old friend

[Goombah]

I have a old friend, 67 years old to be specific, that is in good shape (looks more late 50ish), and whom has spent the last several years taking advantage of his ability to do business in eastern Europe to data a lot of ladies in Ukraine, Russia, and the surrounding countries.  He is reasonably wealthy, speaks fair Russian, and seems to do quite well. 

He has commonly (almost exclusively) dated ladies in their 20s and 30s.  Recently he sent me photos of his fiancee, a 28 year old beauty!

There is a 15 year difference between my wife and I, and I can honestly say that, at least so far, it hasn't made any difference.  But I have got to think 39 years is a different story.

Does anyone know of success stories in this range?  Any "watch outs" from somebody married to a lady 30+ years younger?

Thanks,

Kevin

[Rvrwind]

Money & flypaper attract the same type of pests...
It will work great till she can figure out how to separate the fool from his money & then its off to greener younger pastures. Can't say that for a fact but I'd put money on it...if I had any.
Just was does this old fart figure he has in common with a 28 year old??? Give me a break!!! One word -  :usdeyes:

[Goombah]

Love he claims.  Mutual understanding in all things that matter I hear.

Odd as I find it, I have to give him credit.  He has (2) more 20-30ish ladies waiting for him in Ukraine if this one doesn't work out, and he has been VERY successful in dating the same.

Kevin

[Rvrwind]

And I'll give you odd's every one of them knows he has money, otherwise they wouldn't give him the time of day.
Goombah you've been around here for a while, you really believe its love???
More like LUST for him & $$$ for her!!!
Sorry but thats the way I sees it...

[Goombah]

Well... lets just say I have my concerns (after all, he is a friend).  I've yet to meet the two of them together, although my wife has, and the report wasn't encouraging.

Of course he is in LUST, he considers that key to Love.  I think he acknowledges that they are attracted to his money as well (and he plans on a pre-nup), but is just hoping there is love as well. 

Think about it:  He has been VERY successful at finding young woman to give him attention, he WANTS a young wife to have kids wife, so justifies his target age range.  If he admitted they JUST want his money, he would have to choose between paying for his future kids, or giving that thought up and seeking older woman for companionship.  But he likes that young, smooth, perfect flesh... and he has been successful at getting it!  I think he is caught in his own vicious cycle caused by his own "success".

Actually, I don't see an easy way out for him that he would be happy with.

Kevin

[BC]

67 and wants to have kids....

His problem is his ego and desires to leave something behind to prove potency in advanced decrepitude, hence prenup.

Sure, many kids grow up without fathers.. If I grew up knowing my father lost his life as a policeman, soldier, firefighter etc I'd be proud.. as proof of virility I might not.

To the woman I say 'foolsgold'.

To the man and 'father' I say '@ssol'

I guess I'm in a pissy mood tonight.. -happens.. 

[Kuna]

Kevin,

Sorry...  I know this guy is a friend of your but WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE BLOKES?      

When will these guys realise it's not hard for anyone to attract scammers, opportunists or "business transactions"?

Oh yeah... he'll say "we love each other" but he just can't see the truth - or deal with reality.  Of course he'll end up saying crap like, "It's normal", "we're different" and my particular favourite "We are so well matched we were meant to be together".   

He wants a young wife to have his kids???  My a$$!  He wants fresh meat and proof of his virility!  It's an emotional problem...  medication could help this dude without turning him into the town clown!

But he likes that young, smooth, perfect flesh... and he has been successful at getting it!  I think he is caught in his own vicious cycle caused by his own "success".

Actually, I don't see an easy way out for him that he would be happy with.

He likes young smooth flesh???  It's probably a good thing (for him) he'll be dead and buried before the woman matures otherwise his ego might force him to dump her and "go git me another"...

Kevin,  I know I am being harsh here but if some old codger is emotionally depressed and can increase his feeling of wellness by salivating over fresh meat there's nothing you can do.  If you tell him THE TRUTH you will lose a friend but in my books that's not a bad thing.  Imagine having these two to your house for dinner parties or mixing with your broader group of friends...  It's a freak show!

I can accept wide age gaps to a point but I draw the line at someone dating a woman young enough to be his grandchild.  I chose that words carefully... GRANDCHILD.  What was he...  44 when this girls mother first packed her lunch and took her to her first day of school.  Hmmmm...  yeah... OF COURSE they were meant to be together! 

It's not natural and even though they'll both justify it any way they can I'd have more respect for them if they told the truth and say "It's a business relationship and the money she extracts from me is just "fee for service".


As a footnote:

While everyone here might like to complain about the feminists and their attitudes towards men involved in this pursuit I will ask you to look at the constant stream of completely inappropriate behaviour by a very small percentage of people (men and women).

It's vile and disgusting and he deserves everything he gets!

[jb]

Isn't that the same age spread as T/G and vwrw?   Everyone seems to think that one is a good match.

[BC]

When will these guys realise it's not hard for anyone to attract scammers, opportunists or "business transactions"?

Here I have to think 'who's scammin who...'

I'f he's looking for a nice ride into the next life, no objections.. - he pays for his wish.. they are both 'legal' so what the heck.  Thinking about it though, I'm 47 and certainly don't go round lusting after 9 year olds.. don't think that will change in 20 years or so.. but then again who knows -oh well..

The remarks about prenups and kids is what pisses me.. -sorta like he wants the cake, and icing too, all for free (in relative terms).

What's a watermelon with a dried up stump gonna do anyway..  If she's happy brushing up the dust dripping from his butt then ok.. lol

I think I'll apply for a job at the embassy... - there really oughta be a law..

[I/O]

Isn't that the same age spread as T/G and vwrw?   Everyone seems to think that one is a good match.

Wrong JB...!!! Not everyone..!!

Kevin, do what a good friend should do and just tell him he is an "Effing" idiot and to wake up to himself.  You can't do any more than that and if he is detirmined to go into "Auto Crash and Burn" mode, there is nothing you can do.  As my ol' dad says, there is no fool like and old fool.

I/O

[ScottinCrimea]

Isn't that the same age spread as T/G and vwrw?   Everyone seems to think that one is a good match.

jb - everyone?

My thoughts are that there are two people fooling this man - the woman and himself.  Does he honestly believe that these women are drawn to him by his looks and sparkling personality?  I'm guessing two years for the green card and then gone, in the meantime possibly sleeping around.  If she's really smart, she will give him what he's asking for and have a child.  No pre-nup is going to prevent child support payments, and then she's set for life.  I imagine in her mind two years of putting up with his dusty old a$$ is a small price to pay for a lifetime of security.  And heck, in two years she'll only be thirty, living in the US and free to have her pick of someone she is really attracted to.

[Lily]

I have a old friend, 67 years old to be specific, that is in good shape (looks more late 50ish), and whom has spent the last several years taking advantage of his ability to do business in eastern Europe to data a lot of ladies in Ukraine, Russia, and the surrounding countries.  He is reasonably wealthy, speaks fair Russian, and seems to do quite well. 

He has commonly (almost exclusively) dated ladies in their 20s and 30s.  Recently he sent me photos of his fiancee, a 28 year old beauty!

There is a 15 year difference between my wife and I, and I can honestly say that, at least so far, it hasn't made any difference.  But I have got to think 39 years is a different story.

Does anyone know of success stories in this range?  Any "watch outs" from somebody married to a lady 30+ years younger?

Thanks,

Kevin

Kevin,

do you really think that kind of advice would help your friend? You want to hear some success or failure stories? You could have either of them if someone here would take some time to remember.

Actually you just mentioned your friend's age and his sustainable reported success with women a lot younger than himself. Well, my personal opinion is that this man must be a really outstanding person if he managed to get that many girls who like him (let me presume they like him and not his wealth).

My opinion that age is not characterisctic of a person. Age can either be helpful in some things, or be a hurdle in the others. It may be the case that your friend, as I  said earlier, stands head and shoulders out of the male crowd. What else can I say..

I think the esteemed members would appreciate it if you could attach a couple of photos of your outstanding friend. And yes, swimmsuit shots preferred   

[CaptB]

There seems to be a trend in recent years of older (especially divorced and remarried) guys in their forties to mid fifties wanting to start new families. I have a half dozen friends from age 47 to 56......who are having (sometimes a second crop) children now. As far as being there for the kids as a Father.......not too far-fetched (speaking as a 55 y.o.). The 47 y.o. would be 65 at his childs high school graduation.......56 y.o. would be 74. None of us know when are time will be up. I believe someone contemplating raing children.....will reasonably be around......until adulthood. In the ages I described......it is a reasonable expextation. At 67 y.o...................85 y.o. at H.S. graduation..........is not so reasonable........considering the average life expectancy. I think he is thinking more of himself......than about the welfare of kids being brought into this world. Young, smooth bodies.......can't argue there But I have to tell..........8 trips to Russia.........and have seen many stunning women........late 30's into 50's..............some who made the 20 somethings......not so interesting. In her forties.....my wife is in better shape and more attractive than most women here......half her age.

To each his own on the age issue. As far as bringing kids into the world at age 67.........more ego than puting the welfare of such children.......first......when making such a decission.


Capt B

[acrzybear]

I have a old friend, 67 years old to be specific, that is in good shape (looks more late 50ish), and whom has spent the last several years taking advantage of his ability to do business in eastern Europe to data a lot of ladies in Ukraine, Russia, and the surrounding countries.  He is reasonably wealthy, speaks fair Russian, and seems to do quite well. 

He has commonly (almost exclusively) dated ladies in their 20s and 30s.  Recently he sent me photos of his fiancee, a 28 year old beauty!

There is a 15 year difference between my wife and I, and I can honestly say that, at least so far, it hasn't made any difference.  But I have got to think 39 years is a different story.

Does anyone know of success stories in this range?  Any "watch outs" from somebody married to a lady 30+ years younger?

Thanks,

Kevin

Kevin

I'm going to be a bit brutal here, so you might want to get the women and children out of the room before you go any further.


If this guy wants to date girls young enough to be his granddaughter and they are ok with the program, then whatever arrangements they have are between the two of them.  This thing that pi$$es me off  :seething: :burnedup: is that some horny old goat wants to get some woman pregnant to prove that he's still "got it" where he thinks it counts.  

 Now if this relationship was just affecting the two of them -no big deal, but let's say he does get her pregnant he'll be 67 or 68 by the time the child enters this world, what kind of father would he be when he's 80+ and the child is a mere 9 or 10?.  

  Any idiot can be a sperm donor, but takes a real man to be a father (and last I checked $$$ alone does not make a father)

Ok I'm done

It is now safe for the women and children to reenter the room.

[Rvrwind]

But he likes that young, smooth, perfect flesh...

Yeah, me too but I know my limits & am okay with that. He needs to learn his. By the way, I can get them too, but I'm not stupid enough to think that love has a damn thing to do with it.

Wrong JB...!!! Not everyone..!!
I/O

Ditto that, jb!! Not Everyone...

Kevin, he's going to do what he wants no matter what anybody says, including you. The most you can do for hm is give him a shoulder to cry on after the crash & burn, which take my word for it, will happen sooner or later...
You might want to tell him that a prenup in the event there are children, won't be worth the paper its written on.

[Serebro]

Hm, I have got the question .. mainly to myself.
Do all these young girls have relatives?! How do they introduce this man to them?!
My father would spank me...

[Blues Fairy]

Does he look like Sean Connery? 

Seriously I don't see what advice you could possibly give that would have any effect on the man and his desires.  Nothing's easier than dating young girls, even without the $$$ - just stroke their egos enough and they'll flock into your arms.  So this old guy has skills and charm enough, he'll play until he's (hopefully) bored, no matter how hard you try to dissuade him.   

[Jazzyclassy]

I think this guy does not know where to spend his money and we all discussed that so many times here, one in a millions can such union survive and well none can claim for sure that it was pure love and only love, come on even kids know it is no way near love when they are having grandpa and grand daughter union , it is all temporary for some period of time ...... it is not sincere and is based on material things or on other profitable reasons for both partners

that is how I feel about this matter

what can I say more it makes me sad that people do not do traditional couples anymore, why they can not be attracted to their age partners ? god knows, or maybe money and youth , grandpa is providing with money and grand daughter is providing with youth .... I really do not want to insult anyone  that is just how I think about this topic

[Lily]

Does he look like Sean Connery? 

   

Seriously, Blues Fairy, when I just placed my profile, I received a letter from an elder man who was looking very much like Sean Connery in his later years. I replied him and told that I don't think it is a good idea to send me photos of celebrities instead of his own ones. He wrote me back asserting that those are his actual recent photos.

[Shadow]

If your friend really believes it is love and not lust, let him do away with the pre-nups.  also he might go for a 18-20 year old. Lets face it, he has probably no more than 20 years left. When he is done, his wife should be young enough to find a life partner.
If he does not want to do away with the pre-nups then it means he is not really convinced of her love, and he knows what he gets in to very well. If that is the choice both make, we are not the ones that should be judging them.

[Jazzyclassy]

If your friend really believes it is love and not lust, let him do away with the pre-nups.  also he might go for a 18-20 year old. Lets face it, he has probably no more than 20 years left. When he is done, his wife should be young enough to find a life partner.
If he does not want to do away with the pre-nups then it means he is not really convinced of her love, and he knows what he gets in to very well. If that is the choice both make, we are not the ones that should be judging them.

I agree  with this

it is just he knows what he is doing, if he does not know and thinks it is love , well he needs to have brains operation done , if they do it nowadays , though  it probably will be in vain as you can not buy brains ..........

[I/O]

well he needs to have brains operation done , if they do it nowadays , though  it probably will be in vain as you can not buy brains ..........

Well, if the day comes I need a brain transplant, I would like to have the one from the guy in question, because it is..............................new.

I/O

[Turboguy]

Isn't that the same age spread as T/G and vwrw?   Everyone seems to think that one is a good match.

Thanks for the vote of confidence jb.  I always knew you were a true believer.   I am glad no one bumped your chin as you were writing that since I am sure your tongue was in the area of your cheek and it could have been painful.

The idea that he wants to have a child seems like a bit of a shocker for most of you.  It does not to me.  I have a few friends in similar age ranges (one ready to turn 66 and one 62 whose main goal is to have the child they never had and so they look for 20 something RW.  I suppose it is a little on the order of a 40 something career AW whose clock is running out and decides to have a child.   If my two friends or the one in question achieve their goal I have a feeling it may fit the category of "Be careful what you wish for.............." 

As far as the discussion about the pre nup.   A pre nup does not HAVE to be a bad thing for the RW.  If it is too lopsided the courts would probably throw it out anyway. 

If it is a bad choice no one is going to talk any sense into his head anyway and I see enough age gap marriages, even one with more gap than he has who seem to do fine.  I am sure none of the age gap marriages will ever have to plan for their golden wedding anniversary but I am sure there are some that will long outlast a few of those here who have high hopes and a small age gap. 

[I/O]

I am sure none of the age gap marriages will ever have to plan for their golden wedding anniversary

Quite so, but the odds are pretty good that a few of the extreme one's will have a "Golden Handshake" anniversary, year after year after year after year....................after the crash and burn and the subsequent smash and grab.

I/O

[Turboguy]

You have to look at the bright side for the guy though.  If the courts award alimony he may cop out and die and save some money. 

I have to admit having had some thoughts about doing my last post and chiming in with a "what an idiot he is, it has no chance of succeeding" theme just to see what kind of reaction that got.