How you met your wife or fiance part II

[Bruce]

WNVS=write none visit some (this includes a general letter of introduction and just showing up to an agency to meet girls).

WOVO - write one visit one

WSVS - write some visit some

WMVS - write many visit some

[Shadow]

Always there is a guy who has an option you did not put.
WSVO : Write Some Visit One.

Also, do we see a dating site as an agency, oras a separate option ?

[I/O]

None of the above. I had given up in some disgust after being told too many lies. She wrote to me and it went from there. Very very slowly.

I/O

[Gator]

Do I get to vote twice because of two engagements?  Or maybe not at all because I am taking too long?

I assume "agency" is an organization that provides on-ground support after you arrive in her country.

[Misha]

Always there is a guy who has an option you did not put.
WSVO : Write Some Visit One.

Also, do we see a dating site as an agency, oras a separate option ?

I would see it as a separate option.

[Simoni]

WMVS - write many visit some

I used an agency.

Wrote several brief letters to a number of girls.

Got there.  Met them one by one.  Four or five a day.   Since there is only time for one lunch and one dinner, it means the others have 30 minutes to one hour meetings over coffee.

Stopped my meetings when I clicked with one, and spent the rest of my trip getting to know her.

[BillyB]

I can't vote either. WMVO for me although I initially intended to do WMVM.

[Gator]

This is interesting.  Please vote for the closest example.

[Phil dAmore]

I didn't see an option for: Met her while delivering a package for her friends mom  while I was in-country to meet another girl who ultimately stood me up.

[ScottinCrimea]

I thought, being a WOVO without agency help, I would be in the minority, especially with so many vocal proponents of WMVM with agency help on this board.  It's early, but my fellow romantics and I seem to have jumped into the lead.

[BillyB]

Scott it seems based on 16 votes and a 9-6 ratio, most men choose to visit some/many women on their trip when they found their wife or fiancee. Some women have mentioned they will never date a man who visits more than one but guys who visit more than one is having great success regardless of the amount of RW out there that want a man to commit to her before the first date.

[timothe]

I never used an agency and never paid for an address.  In the early stages, I did have a membership at American Singles but I found my own ways to reach the untarnished women from the FSU.  My fiancee has never advertised herself with an agency...she's not that motivated to leave her country.

However, I don't think it's appropriate for me to discuss my methods of finding women on this forum because it comes with its own set of problems.  While I never had to worry about writing to scammers, I did have some unfruitful dates/relationships because I met women who were not yet committed to leave their country.  Believe me, it's more than frustrating to meet someone who knocks your socks off, who likes you, but she needs much more time and commitment before deciding to leave everything she knows and loves. 

When I was doing the deal before, I thought I was smarter than all of the people that used agencies and services like A-Web.  I thought I was saving money and eliminating the mistrust factor in my search...and I was.   But in the long run, I spent more money and time and aggravation by taking the circuitous (sp?) route.  Although I am happy in my decision and I met a real gem of a lady, I wouldn't recommend my route to others. 

[KenC]

Where does "saw her on an agency website and just called her on the phone" fit into this poll?  All of our contact was direct without agency involvment.
KenC

[Simoni]

Where does "saw her on an agency website and just called her on the phone" fit into this poll?  All of our contact was direct without agency involvment.
KenC

I'd sort of lump that with the agencies route. 

I count Marina that way because that is where I saw her.   She met me the night I flew in and since she speaks fluent English, we did not use the agency.  But if she had not signed up with the agency, I doubt if I would have ever met her.

[Bruce]

Well, looks like I made another C- of  a poll.  Sorry about that.  What is interesting is that the WOVO people are a way higher percentage then I have ever seen on any similar poll.  Interesting.

[BillyB]

What is interesting is that the WOVO people are a way higher percentage then I have ever seen on any similar poll.  Interesting.

The guys who visited more than one outnumber the guys 13-8 who did VO based on 24 votes. What were the percentages you've seen of other polls Bruce?

It's interesting to see that when using an agency, very few do a VO but when doing things on your own, more guys tend to VO.

[Serebro]

Some women have mentioned they will never date a man who visits more than one

I won't.
there's a border between doing "non-romantic" things and "romantic" things.
Recently I corresponded with a very nice guy.Everything was fine untill the moment when we decided to meet.
It was going to be his first visit to Russia and I don't live in Moscow. I offered him to meet him in Moscow so it would have been easier for him as I could have helped him to avoid many problems with the local people(I read trip reports from time to time), I was ready to pay for my tickets to Moscow and back myself.
but he refused.///
I met him through the datingwebsite in a chatroom, when I met him I deleted my profile so you should have seen the expression on my face when I saw him there again and it turned out that he went to the same website every day!At the same time he wrote letters to me once a week(blaming it on lack of time as he was very busy)....

so I had to say a good-bye to him.

I know that every person has his own standarts/criterias, but writing THAT type of letters (that wasn't a weather discussion, you know) and meeting more than one woman looked like a betray to me.
I assume that some men can write to many girls who don't speak English, but that wasn't my case.

I need some romantic in my life so I am not a big lover of the story I will probably have to tell to my grandchildren one day..."oh, when your grandfather came to Russia to meet me I was somewhere between his number 4 and his number 12"
I agree that many people have different points of view and I am ready to listen to the story like "do you know how much money people spend...blablabla" again.
PS:it seems to me that the main aim of the men who do WMVM/WMVS is to GET MARRIED/HAVE A SEXUAL TOUR but not to meet his woman(maybe they want to meet a woman but it's not their number one reason) It looks like "they are ready to get married so they are going to meet as many people as possible to find at least someone who will be able to meet their expectations. So they use this method to have a being married(having sex)result.

I am looking for the man whose aim is to MEET HIS LOVE, but not to have a marriage status by all possible methods as soon as possible and in achieving his aim he doesn't count money/time/trips.

So according to the age of the members of RWD it looks like they are afraid of losing much time so that's why these WMVM/WMVS methods are so popular.

[Jazzyclassy]

I agree with Serebro I would never date a guy who came to visit many women at once and I never did
That is personal choice and personal culture and depends on  what is important for you !
 Some people would say that WOVO is completely non successful , well for some category of people who  have different aims , of course this way of doing things wont help them...

People who want to create stable, serious relations likely always do WOVO trip and usually succeed, those who are always in search I suggest that marriage is not for them , as many people think that phsycology of a person changes when he is married and if he was happy- go -lucky and unfaithful person  he would be somebody else, do not expect him to change after marriage, it is likely he will stay the same moreover his lacks will be worsen and  he will continue his search when you are becoming old a little bit chubby middle aged woman...
Men they are very scared to get old, so they will switch their youth button and sail for a younger blood. Those guys who stick to this many women on one trip obviously  are not ready to get settled , I do not trust such men , it is like in the  University ,one boy is dating several girls at a time, Is he ready to be a husband or moreover a father? Of course not!
Unfortunately such boys from Uni may never grow up and after they are 50 they still think like that-Why not? why not to date several women I need my chemistry - What is chemistry to most of you? Sexual attraction, or you mean soul mate connection? Well that is a big question and each of us understands it how we need to and think is right.

Anyway am just speaking my mind, for the majority of guys here my opinion is wrong  in the first place so who ever cares .......

[Shadow]

In the never-ending argument of visit one or many, I was lucky to be able to make short trips as logistics allow it. For men from the US or Australia it can be a different story all together. Even if they have enough time, the duration of travel makes it impossible to make a visit of just two or three days. And when there is no click (meeting in person can be different from over the net or calls) it wastes a lot of time. In this way I can understand if a man plans to visit more than one woman on a first trip.

[deccie]

I am looking for the man whose aim is to MEET HIS LOVE, but not to have a marriage status by all possible methods as soon as possible and in achieving his aim he doesn't count money/time/trips.

Would not a man who did not keep account of the cost of the exercise not be considered financially reckless with money? What would be the point if a man blew his money to find his love and then not have enough to actually create a REAL family?

I think you underestimate the cost of this exercise from a man's perspective greatly. For those who don't own their own business and even for some who do time away from work is a severe limiting factor on it's own. You are basically asking a man to blow up to $3000-$5000 on a blind date.

[I/O]

You are basically asking a man to blow up to $3000-$5000 on a blind date.

Yep...!~!! That is exactly what they ask for and they don't mind doing it time and again, but there is very very few of these women who will apply the same standards in reverse. The ones who do are IMO the real gems, but they are rare. I looked for one, didn't find one, gave up and she found me. I dunno, how do ya work it out. :noidea: :noidea: :noidea:

A shrewd man once said, "Women are the queerest cattle you'll ever try to pen".

I/O

[William3rd]

You can always date locally and save the 5k.

Keeping track of what has been spent is one thing but to wail and scatter ashes in your hair over it is another.

[deccie]

You can always date locally and save the 5k.

Or you could find a woman who treats your money with the same respect she treats her own.
Since, if you do marry, it WILL be her own.

Keeping track of what has been spent is one thing but to wail and scatter ashes in your hair over it is another.

I don't think anyone is wailing or scattering any ashes Vilhelm. Was that your pickup tactic?

[William3rd]

uhhh no, dickie. It wasnt.

and uhhh dickie- uhhh, raising a family willl cost you a little more than 5K so you better do double duty out there on the highways picking up them coke cans.

Hint- you can get a really nice ring for your cost conscious lady by getting a ring offa one of them cans.

[deccie]

uhhh no, dickie. It wasnt.

and uhhh dickie- uhhh, raising a family willl cost you a little more than 5K so you better do double duty out there on the highways picking up them coke cans.

Hint- you can get a really nice ring for your cost conscious lady by getting a ring offa one of them cans.

No problem, she can always go work as a pro^H^H^H Lawyer.