The train came off the tracks

[DKMM]

Yeah you were doing a little "i told you so" there.  Reality is firmly in my face right now, its not like I don't see what happened.  To even suggest I dragged my relationship out to prove anything to RWD is just silly. 

Maybe you are just talking about the things people told me on this thread a month ago, in which case yes i have to agree that I was not paying attention.  I am a little displaced right now so I don't mean to come off as snappy.  I thought since I already backed things off that I had nothing to lose by coming to Turkey for a final round, but instead it was just a bad experience except for the closure. 

[catzenmouse]

Okay dude have it any way you want. It's pretty clear that lots of synapses are firing in your head, just not in any kind of sensible order.

"I" have told you very little in the past. You have been told the same advice from the start (and that was not just the past month, nice use of ignoring your history there) which you argued with, ignored, or twisted into something that helped you to justify the cluelessness with which you went on your merry way.

Perhaps this selective memory is your way of allowing you to continue to do the same thing again and again while expecting different results. Most people would equate that with insanity but hey, if if works for you then go for it.


 

[Shadow]

If a guy points a gun at someone and tells them 'do not move or I will kill you', most people will stand still. Some have the urge to start dancing to see if the guy is serious. Only in movies these people survive. In real life, they die.

[Son of Clyde]

I know we cannot change DKMM's mind but are there sites for meeting women from all countries not just RW? This would be the place to put up a profile. You can still love Russia but be corresponding with women from all over the globe.

[William3rd]

There are some folks that should stay a little closer to home and try matches through their local church, synagogue or co-dependency group. . . . .

[acrzybear]

Maybe you are just talking about the things people told me on this thread a month ago, in which case yes i have to agree that I was not paying attention.  I am a little displaced right now so I don't mean to come off as snappy.  I thought since I already backed things off that I had nothing to lose by coming to Turkey for a final round, but instead it was just a bad experience except for the closure. 

It wasn't a total loss, she recieved a $600.00 coat and a free vacation with her friend as a parting gift

[KenC]

It wasn't a total loss, she recieved a $600.00 coat and a free vacation with her friend as a parting gift

That's the way I see it too.  She needed to milk the cow one last time.  And why did she do it?  Because she could!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dumb, dumb, dumb

DKMM's saga should be posted somewhere in the Hall of Shame as a guide to all newbies on what not to do.  It is almost unbelievable that someone could be this stupid and inept.
KenC

[Jazzyclassy]

the fact that she has had  his money and all the presents from him that is just ridiculous,  he knew how she treated him and still gave her so much money as she wished for, that is just unbelievable

my hubby is asking darling DKMM could he pay his student loan sometimes .....

I want to wish DKMM to be more careful with his fortune and moreoever with his family's one

[KenC]

the fact that she has had  his money and all the presents from him that is just ridiculous,  he knew how she treated him and still gave her so much money as she wished for, that is just unbelievable

my hubby is asking darling DKMM could he pay his student loan sometimes .....

I want to wish DKMM to be more careful with his fortune and moreoever with his family's one

Jazzy,
We have a saying here:
A fool and his money shall soon be parted.

My guess is that it is family money so it is "easy come, easy go."
KenC

[acrzybear]

In my line of work DK would be classified as a professional victim.

 I see it all the time-the person gets taken for $$$ and they always complain "why me?" 

[Shadow]

E bought a fur coat and had me pull out the cash from my bank account to cover it (she had to use a specific bank for hers so it was a convenience thing).  $600 btw. 
-------betting episode------------

She got the money out of her account, literally draining it down to less than 1000 rubles and paid me back. 

Not to be a cheerleader for DKMM, but I noticed that the reading capacities of some people are near the dating capacities of others. 
Now DKMM might have saved himself the whole trip....but he did not pull out a $600 fur coat as parting gift.

[Son of Clyde]

I think it is a trap many of us fall into based on a misconception thet RW are poor and destitute. Maybe sometimes it is true, but RW are survivors and some of them will take from a well intended AM. I am thinking it is rare, because most of the RW I have met here in the states have been quite the opposite. These women have been honest, dependable and kind, but there is always that 2% who are not. If you like RW, look here in the states and save all those travel expenses.

[KenC]

Not to be a cheerleader for DKMM, but I noticed that the reading capacities of some people are near the dating capacities of others. 
Now DKMM might have saved himself the whole trip....but he did not pull out a $600 fur coat as parting gift.

Shadow,
The soap opera of DKMM and "E" has more flip flopping than Kerry ever did.  He paid for the coat, she was going to pay him back, she wasn't going to pay him back and finally she did.  It is difficult to understand where the bouncing ball ended up.  I, myself thought he paid for the coat too, but you are correct.

But it is a mute point because I am sure DKMM was out a lot more than the cost of the coat with all the travel expenses.  The mere fact that DKMM trusted such an untrustworthy woman to pay him back is further evidence of his naivety.  In the end this foolish action didn't cost him, but it easily could have.
KenC

[Son of Clyde]

Just think, if she would have lived in the states he could have saved the shipping charges. This world has givers and takers and I think the takers have become that way through the reinforcement of the givers. They have adopted methods to encourage this behavior to get anything they want.

[Serebro]

It's -15F where I am now so the fur coat's discussion attracted my attention:)
 
$600 fur coat is a bad fur coat.
All good ones here start at $1200 and above...

[BC]

Closure is what he wanted, closure is what he got per his last posts.. - albeit at a price.

I don't believe such stories are uncommon.  DKMM said he would report and he did for the benefit of those that might later stumble across - that in itself is uncommon as we see only the tip of the iceberg here.

Another proof for communal wisdom.. lets not argue with that.

[evaljean]

Dude, I am reading this on my lunch hour.  It's like watching two cars about to crash, it all goes in slow motion til impact.  Then BAM! it all speeds up again.  I'll read the whole thing later.

Couple of points:

1.  Failed Engagements: Happens to many people, but most don't talk about it.  If you have ever been there you can recognize the symptoms.  Take your time, lick your wounds, get back in the game.  Trust me, I've been there.

2.  Women:  (Pay attention, this may be the shortest and most powerful course on women you ever read.  Are you ready?  Here goes.)

Lesson #1: There are only two types of women in the world.  Those that are interested in you and those that are not.  Focus on women who are interested in you.

Lesson #2: Of those that are interested in you there are only two types of them.  Those that you are interested in, and those you are not.   Focus on women interested in you that you are also interested in.

Lesson #3:  If a woman is truly interested in you, she will let you know, and unless you screw it up, she is likely to remain interested.

Lesson #4:  If a woman is not interested in you and you have "work" or "prove" to her she should be interested, then you get what you deserve.  Life is too short, and there are too many women to work that hard.

Lesson #5: You are going to do what you want to do anyway, so good luck, I wish you well, and I hope it all works out for you.

PS: You can leave my dollar by the door.

Uncle Eric

[BC]

I think it is a trap many of us fall into based on a misconception thet RW are poor and destitute. Maybe sometimes it is true, but RW are survivors and some of them will take from a well intended AM. I am thinking it is rare, because most of the RW I have met here in the states have been quite the opposite. These women have been honest, dependable and kind, but there is always that 2% who are not. If you like RW, look here in the states and save all those travel expenses.

There are folks in every country, state or city that will not hesitate to empty filled pockets.

Lets face it.. part of the 'allure' of FSU and other economically disadvantaged countries is being able (in relative terms) to 'be king for a day' seeking more bang for buck.

When it takes so little effort, no capital investment and only minimal knowledge to give the kings of this earth a sponge bath, I have often wondered why I still toil at a relatively normal job instead of selling fantasy. 

[Shadow]

It's -15F where I am now so the fur coat's discussion attracted my attention:)
 
$600 fur coat is a bad fur coat.
All good ones here start at $1200 and above...

If you know where to go you can get good things at a cheap price in Turkey. On the other hand if you do not know what you are buying, you are likely to end up with a $600 rat coat. 

[KenC]

There are folks in every country, state or city that will not hesitate to empty filled pockets.

Lets face it.. part of the 'allure' of FSU and other economically disadvantaged countries is being able (in relative terms) to 'be king for a day' seeking more bang for buck.

When it takes so little effort, no capital investment and only minimal knowledge to give the kings of this earth a sponge bath, I have often wondered why I still toil at a relatively normal job instead of selling fantasy. 

BC,
I told a friend of mine (that was going to Ukraine on Jack's tour) that it would be the closest thing to being Hugh Heffner he will ever experience!   8)I meant that in a good and bad way too.  When he returned, he agreed.
KenC

[chivo]

I've read the story, and yes I found myself cringing more times than not.  Obviously he made a lot of mistakes, and as he mentioned, try to find "lightning in a bottle".

I'm sure a few months from now he'll be able to think of this more logically and realize things much better. I'm sure any of us who haven't been married the majority of our life, and have actually dated and romanced a good number of women have done some pretty foolish things at one time or another for whatever our motivations were. Especially in our 20's.

It's all part of "that" game if you chose to play. Albeit, the logistics of this affair make for a bigger spending opportunity, still, I'm sure they're plenty around who if they had the cash, would/have played the fool even closer to home.

We all learn our lessons at different times in our lives. Hopefully he learned one with this. But...

Why do I get the feeling some of you would throw an anvil to a man overboard if he disagreed with you. There are a lot of things that have been said throughout this thread, good and bad. A lot of useful information. I think some of you need to back away from yourselves. The guy is obviously an emotional mess right now (if you can't read between the lines - in between your I told you so's).

He went to Russia and got worked. Hardly the first, and surely not the last, this board notwithstanding. And yes he's a little cocky, brash, and has some growing up to do... so what, he's 29. Last time I checked he was alive, had his health, and is out some money. I can think of much worse situations.

Yeah, boy or boy he sure did take a dump there - hey I got an idea, why don't we all rub his nose in it some more...sheesh .

chivo

[timothe]

I just love how the "caring" and "concerned" people mercilessly pile on  when a newer member comes here and admits their mistakes.  It's as if the grand masters of this board have NEVER actually made relationship mistakes themselves.  (In spite of the fact that almost all of them have been divorced at least once.)  And I'm sure none of you ever ignored good relationship advice, right?  Of course not. 

I would have liked to have been in a position where I could have been making those mistakes at 29.  I didn't start my romantic adventures in foreign countries until I was 34.  At what age did you guys start?  Or were you too tied up in bad relationships to start until much later in life?

You can take your collective foot off DKMM's head anytime now. 

[LiveFromUkraine]

I happend to agree with Timothe and Chivo.  If you want people to come back and post their mistakes so others can learn than I suggest a more lighter tone than the laughing brigade.  Otherwise we will not hear stories that can help others.


Just some food for thought.




Thomas


P.S.  I understand why some people are making the comments that they are but it will still keep others from posting their mistakes as well as their successes.  We will learn far more from the mistakes IMO.

[Mod7]

OK gents, this thread has more than served its purpose, time to move on.