New thread about father and children

[docetae]

New thread about father and children...My girlfriend has a son who is 11. He see his father perhaps one day every 3 months. My girlfriend told me that by ukrainian law, a child in Ukraine can choose with who he wants to live after 12, can this apply if mother is going abroad ?

The second point is she wants me to be here when she will ask her ex to get paper signed to allow her son to leave Ukraine (her ex is a man who was controlling her for everything and she fears him)... What do you think of that ? Does someone get the same experience than me or has advise ?

ps : I am 6ft6, so I know that my presence will make everything very quiet... but I would like to have a plan B if he says no...

[BillyB]

The second point is she wants me to be here when she will ask her ex to get paper signed to allow her son to leave Ukraine (her ex is a man who was controlling her for everything and she fears him)... What do you think of that ?

If your RW asks you to go and you don't and she gets beat up, you are not going to look good. Do what it takes, within reason, to be with your RW.

Even if you discover Ukraine law will allow the child over 12 to make his/her own decision, check with Canadian law too since they may have requirements of their own.

[docetae]

In all cases, I will go, this is not even a question. I am looking more to get feedback from similar experiences, and to know what are children rights... information on the web about ukrainian children rights available in english is very rare...

Things will not have even the possibility to come to a point of physical confrontation between her and him.

[Rags II]

My wife had to go through this B.S. everytime she went back as they will not let children out of the country (at Borispol at least) without this affidavit. Apparently these documents expire in less than two years as she has had to spend 2-6 hours of "qualitiy time" with her Ex each time that she went back. Unfortunately Ukrainian divorces do not spell out who has custody of the children.

Luckily this summer my wife and daughter can show their new BLUE passports at the airport this summer and avoid the BS with her Ex...

Personally I think that you being there will not help the situation. Perhaps (if she agrees) a large male friend could go with her and would not escalate the situation into something worse. You could always go over for moral support but I would not think that you being at the meeting would be a positive influence on the outcome.

[wxman]

docetae,

Ukrainian law is very muddled. Getting sole custody of a child is very hard in Ukraine. Now only does the ex have rights, so do the grandparents and other close relatives. Once the child turns 16, he/she will no longer need the permission of the other parent.  Without sole custody, her ex will have an equal say, even if he has little or no contact with the child.

If you go to meet the ex, try to stay out of the debate, as the child is still HIS child. Do not offer him a bribe. He could actually use that against you (Kind of like buying the child). Of course if he asks for something instead, and he will sign all the neccessary documents, then you might wish to do that, if it is reasonable.