Education matters. Or not?

[Julia G]

 This topic stems from another one here. there is a joke about it that uneducated girls were paid more for in ancient times. How`s it today? Did you have problems connected with girl`s education and attitudes about it? I learned that some men react with inner pain when it comes to education. Why does it happen?

[Gator]

Having an Ivy League graduate degree, education is important to me, yet I did not consider it a mandatory requirement when seeking a wife.  Mandatory to me were intelligence and intellectual curiosity, two qualities indicated by a high education from a prominent university. 

My wife has a Master's degree; however, that is not what attracted me to her.  When we first met, she had not yet completed her studies because of two children and divorce.  Yet, she was bubbling over with intelligence, intellectual curiosity, and something else that is very special:  street smarts.  It does not get better than that.

I had a year-long relationship with a woman lacking any university studies.  Instead, when she was 17 she worked as a circus performer, started a successful 16-year career as a fashion model in Europe, and even practiced for the Olympics.  Yes, she marched to a different drummer.  I thought her to be one of the most fascinating women I have ever known.  A university degree would have slowed her and added nothing to who she is.

Your use of the word "pain" confuses me.  The only pain I would feel is to have a wife who could not get a job equal to her education (e. g., a medical doctor working as a cosmetologist).

[BC]

Just guessing, but maybe some (not I) think that a young woman without education will be more malleable or will not complain much because she knows no different.

There are others that probably sit there at their keyboard dreaming of a doctor or dentist or lawyer that will resolve their financial woes and allow early retirement.

Both are in for big trouble IMHO.

[Ade]

There are others that probably sit there at their keyboard dreaming of a doctor or dentist or lawyer that will resolve their financial woes and allow early retirement.

My fiancée told me that there are a number of women on Russian International dating forums that are concerned about marrying WM with a lot of debt; the fear seems to stem from the idea that they will be forced to work only to help clear the debt. I wonder how many have actually been used that way...

[Simoni]

This topic stems from another one here. there is a joke about it that uneducated girls were paid more for in ancient times. How`s it today? Did you have problems connected with girl`s education and attitudes about it? I learned that some men react with inner pain when it comes to education. Why does it happen?

It mattered to me.  I purposely only searched for girls with a university degrees.  That left out the shop girls and hair stylists (no offense to them, but I wanted someone who was well read).

[Simoni]

My fiancée told me that there are a number of women on Russian International dating forums that are concerned about marrying WM with a lot of debt; the fear seems to stem from the idea that they will be forced to work only to help clear the debt. I wonder how many have actually been used that way...

What a naive statement!

If a guy wants to marry a girl to reduce debt, he will marry an American girl, not one from the FSU. 

FSU girls make much less if they take a job in the US because their training usually does not transfer.   My guess is that this holds true in other parts of the west as well.

[Julia G]

  When I was 19 and began dating I  responded to one man that I seek man with education higher than school one (in a polite manner explaining that`s my personal freak wish) he sent me a letter full of anger with  statements 1st - that all we want are big wallets.2. that he with his school earns more than some professors. There was not a word about money in my letter. Anyway for me money matters, I didn`t search for Rockafeller but enough for middle-class life (I belong to upper-middle class here), but there was not a single word there. There were many men with similar reaction so i had to put the education requirement into profile and tell there that I ingnore ones who don`t read it. Of course I made exception for ones who noticed it but still wrote but in general most were not interesting even for being friends.
 Education is not very tightly connected with intellect, but for me at least college is a must because it shows a person is able to learn, is a professional who can do something at good level and wasn`t lazy or afraid of taking loan. Though here higher education is available for any woman, so if there`s no college even it can tell a lot about the woman after 25-30yo In West it all is much more complicated. That`s why I started this topic

[BC]

It mattered to me.  I purposely only searched for girls with a university degrees.  That left out the shop girls and hair stylists (no offense to them, but I wanted someone who was well read).

There's probably a lot of crossover in that grouping.. No Phd but a LOT of books in her house did impress me.  I never got to War and Peace.. Our 13 year old is plugging her way through it.  My wife has read it several times (all four volumes or so).

Might be different with the younger crowd though - maybe those under 30 nowdays.

I'm an avid reader myself and can enjoy a lazy day in bed with wifey reading books (well not only).

We order books direct from RU and orders are at least 20 books per month, usually around 30.

[Simoni]

We order books direct from RU and orders are at least 20 books per month, usually around 30.

You might enjoy the Kindle reader from amazon.com

It is really cool and saves shipping books.  Hundreds of thousands of books are available, including classics and NY Times best sellers.

And at a much less expensive price.

[Misha]

My fiancée told me that there are a number of women on Russian International dating forums that are concerned about marrying WM with a lot of debt; the fear seems to stem from the idea that they will be forced to work only to help clear the debt. I wonder how many have actually been used that way...

I have a friend whose wife is now a dentist and she is raking in the dough and she bought a huge new house. It did however take her a decade to get certified and didn't work at any time before that. If a guy actually planned to get married to a woman from the FSU to pay off his debts I would advise him to be patient. It may take a decade or two before he achieves his aim  :evil: Simoni is right, if you want to marry someone who will be able to at least pay her equal share (rent, car, food, etc...), you are much better off marrying a local woman who already has a job.

[BC]

What a naive statement!

If a guy wants to marry a girl to reduce debt, he will marry an American girl, not one from the FSU. 

FSU girls make much less if they take a job in the US because their training usually does not transfer.   My guess is that this holds true in other parts of the west as well.

Must be my day to pick on you Simoni!  

What about the guys that have trouble getting even a date at home and think their best shot is a FSUW?

From your learned POV you are quite correct though..

I think if I were looking for a woman to help out with finances, I would probably go for a music teacher, gymnast, or ballet artist.. more along the lines of cash in hand type jobs.  Heck even karate would do just fine.

[BC]

You might enjoy the Kindle reader from amazon.com

It is really cool and saves shipping books.  Hundreds of thousands of books are available, including classics and NY Times best sellers.

And at a much less expensive price.

Yeah I tried one.. Just doesn't feel like a book..  when they come out with a Kindle with two screens, I'll bite again.

Guess I'm just to 'set' in my ways.  Besides, I can't count how many times a book has fallen to the floor when I doze off.. a book is the best sleeping pill there is.. well almost.

[BC]

Simoni is right, if you want to marry someone who will be able to at least pay her equal share (rent, car, food, etc...), you are much better off marrying a local woman who already has a job.

Bet you won't get more than that 'equal share' though.. LOL

Most of the time, she'll have her own car, go through that 'we gonna live at your place or mine' routine, and god forbid you marry a vegetarian.
 

[BC]

My fiancée told me that there are a number of women on Russian International dating forums that are concerned about marrying WM with a lot of debt; the fear seems to stem from the idea that they will be forced to work only to help clear the debt. I wonder how many have actually been used that way...

Guess it's time to offer FSUW credit background checks.. heck your landlord will does one and periodically reviews it.. or is that going too far?  What do they cost.. 19.99?

[Ade]

What a naive statement!

If a guy wants to marry a girl to reduce debt, he will marry an American girl, not one from the FSU. 

FSU girls make much less if they take a job in the US because their training usually does not transfer.   My guess is that this holds true in other parts of the west as well.

Uh, so wondering how many men are morally bankrupt and stupid enough to do this is naive?  Now, if I was saying it made sense then yes, I'd be naive at best, but I didn't now, did I?

I have to shake my head at some people here that seem to go out of their way to provoke a negative reaction.  

[kievstar]

Education of a college degree is important.  But I need a woman with street smarts not book smarts.  No offense to people from
Harvard but I always fire ivy league graduates within the first month I take a new job.  They make good lawyers, doctors, politicians, crooks, but terrible executives in business when it comes to managing cash flow.  Based on the Wall street issues seems I got good advice 15 years ago. 

But do guys really go to Russia for an egghead?  maybe. 

[Misha]

st of the time, she'll have her own car, go through that 'we gonna live at your place or mine' routine

Again, she has her car and she has her place. If you really want to pay off your debts you would jump at the offer to live at her place

[Misha]

Uh, so wondering how many men are morally bankrupt and stupid enough to do this is naive?

Well, true, you cite your gf saying "My fiancée told me that there are a number of women on Russian International dating forums that are concerned about marrying WM with a lot of debt." It not about men who have done it, but rather the fears of women who have yet to be married who have fears about this happening. The question would be where exactly do these fears come from?

[Simoni]

I have to shake my head at some people here that seem to go out of their way to provoke a negative reaction.  

Just being factual....

It is naive to think that an American guy would marry an fsu woman to use HER income to pay of debt...

... they will be forced to work only to help clear the debt. I wonder how many have actually been used that way...

[Simoni]

I have a friend whose wife is now a dentist and she is raking in the dough and she bought a huge new house. It did however take her a decade to get certified and didn't work at any time before that. If a guy actually planned to get married to a woman from the FSU to pay off his debts I would advise him to be patient. It may take a decade or two before he achieves his aim  :evil: Simoni is right, if you want to marry someone who will be able to at least pay her equal share (rent, car, food, etc...), you are much better off marrying a local woman who already has a job.

Same experience here.  I have a friend who married a dentist from Moscow.   She can't be a dentist here.  She just completed the training and passed the test to be a dental assistant in the US.  Big step downward.

So the point is twofold: 1)  girls will not qualify for the same job here that they had in the fsu, and 2) If a guy is marrying to get help paying off debt, he would be better off marrying the dentist or vet or business manager there in the USA.  They make a lot more money than what an fsu wife might make.

[Misha]

So the point is twofold: 1)  girls will not qualify for the same job here that they had in the fsu, and 2) If a guy is marrying to get help paying off debt, he would be better off marrying the dentist or vet or business manager there in the USA.  They make a lot more money than what an fsu wife might make.

And then there is the question of language: even though she may be fluent in English, will she know all the jargon for her profession? Will her English be fluent enough to work in a professional field?

Then, there is the issue of networking. Most jobs are found through contacts and you have to build up networks to get a job. This takes time, and it is much harder if you are from another country.

Most successful Russian immigrants that I know worked hard for years before finally breaking into their desired professions.

[Ade]

Just being factual....

It is naive to think that an American guy would marry an fsu woman to use HER income to pay of debt...

Actually no; there are stories circulating of guys doing just that, marrying women primarily for the extra income. Sure, these guys don't get much initially but they get some, and that's the point, not that they make a mint doing it but that they do it.

There are a lot of FSUW that do not understand the system of western debt, it scares them and certainly adds to their fears of enslavement to unscrupulous debt ridden WM.

[Misha]

Actually no; there are stories circulating of guys doing just that, marrying women primarily for the extra income. Sure, these guys don't get much initially but they get some, and that's the point, not that they make a mint doing it but that they do it.

There are thousands of urban legends in circulation that people thing are true, yet are false. What your are presenting are stories being circulated on forums based on a friend of a a friend of a second cousin twice removed  :evil: Hardly factual evidence.

[groovlstk]

Actually no; there are stories circulating of guys doing just that, marrying women primarily for the extra income. Sure, these guys don't get much initially but they get some, and that's the point, not that they make a mint doing it but that they do it.

There is no economic sense to this. A woman who works as a waitress or Walmart clerk may be able to help her debt-ridden husband make ends meet, but given the added expenses she brings to his life there is little likelyhood she can help chip away at his debt. Any scheming Einstein who hopes his wife will pay off his mortgage will have to lay out a big chunk of cash just to get her started on a career path, and it will take years before she's acquired some earnings power.

This sounds like a rumor straight from the babushka radio network.

[GoodOlBoy]

There is no economic sense to this..... This sounds like a rumor straight from the babushka radio network.

 

...marrying women primarily for the extra income....

This is the most ludicrous thing I have read on RWD. 

It costs a "small fortune" (not complaining) to bring a RW here to America. It would take my wife YEARS to payoff what I have spent on our marriage.

And I would do it all again for my Marina, in a New York minute! 


GOB