Another statistic

[Zhena]

Sure-still,you ll never know for sure untl she gets all her documents and until you ll get into the difficult financial situation.

[ScottinCrimea]

Zhena,  It wasn't a difficult financial situation, it just wasn't enough

[pitbull]

Scott,

You mentioned several times that your wife is in a woman's shelter now and that she does have a job.
I am not a big expert on how shelters operate, but I know that a woman can only be admitted to one as a result of a critical situation, particularly abuse by her husband. I cannot imagine why a shelter would admit a woman with a job who just decided to part ways with her husband. Shelters are the places of last resort, not free hotels for any divorcing woman, let alone those with jobs and a car.

Is there something you don't know? This just doesn't add up with the general story line...

[Doll]

Shelters do admit women with job- I know it for sure

[Daveman]

Scott,

You mentioned several times that your wife is in a woman's shelter now and that she does have a job.
I am not a big expert on how shelters operate, but I know that a woman can only be admitted to one as a result of a critical situation, particularly abuse by her husband. I cannot imagine why a shelter would admit a woman with a job who just decided to part ways with her husband. Shelters are the places of last resort, not free hotels for any divorcing woman, let alone those with jobs and a car.

Is there something you don't know? This just doesn't add up with the general story line...

This has been nagging at me a bit too..  She does have a child with her, so I *think* that makes a little difference but I know nothing for sure ... from what I understand, pitbull is correct in that there usually is some kind of 'critical situation' restriction (and my understanding is limited -- having never really been associated with shelters except for some volunteer work, but not specifically with women's shelters). 

[ECOCKS]

Kudos to Zhena's observations and points. They strike me as very realistic and "from the horse's mouth" in their perspective.

My wife and I have had several long talks about the "reality" Zhena describes as we begin our transition from Ukraine to the US. She seems to have a good grasp of the road ahead and indicates acceptance and agreement. Still, language, stores, transportation, people, laws, all of these changes will undoubtedly stress both her, the family and our relationship. Anyone who believes you can talk about these too much strikes me as sadly mistaken and far beyond overconfidence, well into arrogance.

Communicate and watch for the problems to begin emerging and then address them assertively. Don't be afraid to seek counseling at the first sign of trouble.

As a couple of others mention, this "shelter" would bother me as well. I suspect this is going to turn a lot more nasty.

As a few others are advising you Scott, this isn't about being a nice guy or taking the high road, this is about your survival, healing, reputation, legal situation and finances. Get a lawyer on this and let them handle all contact. Sign up for a 6 month stint with an NGO somewhere and get gone. Quickly.

Good luck.
 

[Misha]

Sure-still,you ll never know for sure untl she gets all her documents and until you ll get into the difficult financial situation.

Fortunately, in Canada, wives don't have to wait two years to get a permanent green card. Once she receives her permanent residence, there is no true waiting period. She can pretty much leave any time after that.

[Zhena]

Zhena,  It wasn't a difficult financial situation, it just wasn't enough

Scott,you are the doctor,right? If you are practicing,you are fine,I may suggest...I really dont know,what was your wifes problem,maybe she thought you re too stingy with her,but if thats the main reason-that is pretty stupid...I doubt she will do better,honestly.

[I/O]

Scott

I really did completely miss all of this until I picked up a hint of it somewhere else. I read through the thread yesterday and have been reflecting somewhat since.

Couple of comments for whatever they might be worth. You are in the early stages after breakup and that is a tough time. You need a place to talk it out and here might be as good as any. Do stop trying to understand where and what you missed in her along the way. You never will and it is simply the mind playing stressed tricks on you such that you are actually trying to excuse (to an extent) the situation and blame yourself. Get focused on Scott, what you need immediately, and then what you want in future. There is only one person who matters now on an emotional level. On a more academic level you can continue to "do the right thing" but don't obsess with that. Time to be quite selfish.

I/O

[ScottinCrimea]

Yeah, the shelter thing is a concern.  I don't know exactly what story she told them, but I'm sure it was their idea to have the police come with her when she took her stuff.  It's associated with the YWCA and specifically states that it is for women with a history of domestic violence.  I'm sure the picture of a "poor" Russian immigrant and her 17 year old daughter helped get her in the door.

They offer transitional housing for up to two years while they help the woman find affordable housing and get back on their feet.  They are required to have a job for this program as opposed to the emergency shelter part.

Is there a domestic violence claim looming?  Quite possibly, but she has absolutely nothing to support such a claim.  No police reports, no medical records, no bruises or other marks, etc.  The best she could claim would be verbal abuse.  From my interactions with her so far, I get no sense that she is planning to go this route, but I suspect that she will eventually try to go that route for her green card.  Her problem is that, in addition to no proof of anything, it has been over three weeks now since she left and she has not sought a restraining order.  It would be very difficult for her to do so at this point. She has met with me on two occasions since then, once at my apartment and then yesterday at a 7-11, so she can't really claim she is afraid of me.  I  have the name of one of the officers that came with her when she moved out, and he would testify that my behavior was completely appropriate.  She has no grounds to file criminal charges so I think the issue will be limited to the divorce and the visa.

We met yesterday so she could sign the title of the car over to me, which is really the last thing I needed from her.  I see no reason for any further contact and I won't initiate any.  Her attitude had gone progressively colder and yesterday when I saw her I wondered what I ever saw in her.  She still refuses to give me her alien registration number for my change of address forms, even though I showed her yesterday the form and where it required the number and also the paper with my infopass appointment to visit the immigration field office to get it.  I even mentioned that this will be the same group that would interview her for the removal of conditions, but to no avail.  So I won't worry about it, I'll just get what I need and if it becomes a problem for her there's nothing I can do about it.

I've pretty much gotten to that point where I no longer worry about the negative consequences to her of her poor decisions.  She has clearly been brainwashed by those at the shelter into believing that this has to be an adversarial thing and that she can't trust anything I say or do as it is surely a way to get back at her or cause her problems.  I think it will be a long time before she sees any of her problems as the result of her decisions rather than something I may have done to her.  I've offered my help and advice in total good faith, and she wants nothing to do with it.  Probably better for me as it gets me off the hook completely.

[Doll]

I think the issue will be limited to the divorce and the visa.

Visa?

[mark2353]

Scott,
you can only do so much... do you can not worry for the harm they cause themselves.  I tried the same with my AW to no avail. So you are big now go conquer.
I really believe that some of these ladies do not know how well they have it. So they are always under the impression that the grass is always greener in the other side. Well surprise it is a swamp!!

[MaxxumUSA]

Scott,

I really believe that some of these ladies do not know how well they have it. So they are always under the impression that the grass is always greener in the other side. Well surprise it is a swamp!!

Haha!!

It's funny...  My wife reads the horror stories on her russian woman forum...  I'll be sitting on the couch or something and she just stops and comes over and tells me how lucky she is to have me.  LMAO.  She knows most of the woman that post negative things there are 1/2 full of crap so she pities them.  The ones that she senses are posting the truth helps her realize how good she has it.

Scott -  Like I said - based on what you are writing I think this was the long term plan.  You actually should be grateful it ended this early and did not get worse then it is.

I remember my sister pulled some shelter crap on my brother in law and I was pissed.  He is a good hard working man and never violent at all to her or their children.  I told my sister she was crazy to even think about leaving him and get her ass home quick smart and work things out.  This was 5 years ago and they of course got back together and are extremely happy.

I'm not sure if your woman had a brother like me - if even that would help - but certainly like you said it does not help that her only influence is a bunch of women that ((believe)) they are all victims.  What a horrible influence - "It's ok - just leave and don't take responsibility for your own actions because it's HIS fault!"  Oh..  I can hear it loud and clear.  Wow - quite a jam you're woman is in.  Let her go.  LOL

Well...  I'm out of town playing poker for a few days.

Enjoy and best to you scott.  Sounds like you could use some old friends, a few stiff drinks, and some young strippers!

- David

[ScottinCrimea]

Doll,  Her conditional visa expires in five months and she can't petition for the 10 year green card on her own unless she has divorce papers in hand or can show domestic violence.

Maxxum, Right now I'm having to settle for teetotaling relatives and old women in winter coats, though I'm sure there will be plenty of time later for some celebratory debauchery.

I remember some times in the past when my wife would be talking to some women, come over and give me a hug and say how lucky she was to have me as a husband.  I'm sure she's hearing some horror stories in the shelter, but I imagine they are also putting ideas in her head to convince her that she had it just as bad. I'm sure it becomes something of a competition, just like women like to do with childbirth and trying to be the one who had it the worst.

Unfortunately, any notion that she really didn't have it so bad or that she made a stupid mistake would put her on the outs with everyone there, in addition to being at odds with her stubbornness, so I onhy see her attitude getting worse.

[Doll]

Doll,  Her conditional visa

her conditional GREEN CARD

[Vaughn]

Scott,

  While the majority of YWCA residents have been DV victims, DV is not the overriding qualification
for a woman to be housed there. Individual applications for residency are handled by appointed
caseworkers who rule on eligibility.

  Two things bother me, Scott. I take your claim of nonviolence as Gospel. So she has no grounds
in that arena - other than to fabricate. I'm no lawyer, but from reading other such distressing threads
it would be self-endangering for you to continue meeting her in 7-11 parking lots for whatever reason,
at least without the presence of a credible witness. Beware if she shows up with a girlfriend present.

  Secondly, assuming she has no chance of presenting divorce papers when Removal of Conditions comes
due, what option is she left with? I hate to even suggest that she'd stoop this low - but the fact is, she
and her daughter departed soon after the daughter arrived, and that card could be nastily played as one
of attempted infidelity. In short, making a pass at the daughter - which gives a YWCA caseworker every
reason to declare them eligible for housing.

 Either way - have you called an attorney yet? This could get very sordid.

Vaughn

[Misha]

In reading these threads, it seems to me that men can naively believe that if X amount of time has been spent with their spouses, that they no longer have anything to fear. However, I would caution that it is possible for a woman (and a man) to have a long term plan and they can spend years waiting for their plan to play out. Yes, it may take years for a man to be played, but that does not mean that he is taken for a "лох" by a woman, simply that she may be more patient in seeking to achieve her ultimate goals. The question is when her patience will run out IMHO, and whether she will have enough patience to hide her true intentions for as long as it takes.

[Maxx2]

OK a 100% certainty she filled an USCIS abuse petition against Scott. That is why she went to the shelter or the shelter insisted that she does upon arrival. It's their bread and butter. It's how they make money $$$$$ Did you notice MarkLTP's thread? The woman he took under his wing got a responce back from the Vermont Service Center in two weeks. What she got and Scott's wife got was something called a "Prima Facia Determination document". What this document does is allow their wives to collect welfare benefits both State and County that are reimbursed by Federal Vawa funds. The shelters love to get "abused" and abused foreign women cases because their is no quibbling about the shelter collecting on their services as the State/County is reimbursed by Federal VAWA funds.

Now all that Scott wrote about her not having any evidence. She has evidence. That is her proof that she lived in a shelter. The shelter has given her a letter stating such. Plus the shelter's letter that she and her daughter have been receiving counseling services as abused woman. All of this  "evidence" plus her statement and her daughter's that they have been abused is included in her I-360 abuse petition that was already sent out. Since her conditional green card has been granted all she needs is her divorce papers that show her divorce is final and the local service center will hand her her LPR card. 

In regard to the issue of needing police reports and restraining orders. Many people including some lawyers think this is so. It is not. Abuse petitions are granted without those all the time. What police reports and restraining orders along with hospital reports and photos of scratches, bruises etc do is make the granting of the abuse petition more certain. The reality is almost all abuse petitions are granted. The ones that are rejected are usually those that are sent back to the service center for further documentation, signature and the such. The three cases I know of a rejection are 1) A woman who had no proof she ever lived with her husband. 2) A woman who did not marry her K-1 fiancee but married another man 3) And a woman who had 14 arrests for prostition.

Now what Scott will face in the future is this.

1) His name is/will be in a Federal Data file as an "Abuser". He will be given no opportunity the clear his name. As an "abuser" he will find it difficult to ever sponsor another K-1. He might have more luck with a K-3.

2) He may have to pay back to the Fed all the VAWA money they spent on her her. Up to now the the Federal government has not been enforcing the Affidavit of Support but there is rumor that that will change. John Sampson retired INS/ICE agent told me that the talk in USCIS circles is this provision will be enforced soon.

3) Scott may have trouble renewing his passport. Here is letter I got.

I try to renew my passport. Guess what folks...

If your ex gets to stay on a VAWA visa you WILL NOT be able to get to renew your passport until you've been cleared by the State Department. A hold is now on your record. It will stay there.

I applied in October, was finally contacted by State in December. Sent info showing the restraining order was quashed, passport was granted.

Never received my passport card (lost in mail) so had to ask for reissuance. I'm now stuck waiting for State to act. Again.

My ex can come and go as she pleases. 

So what is the possible way out of all of this? Annulment. Vaugne in a post above gave a reason why this marriage might have been a sham. The only way IMO for an annulment to be granted is to present a very good case. He should talk with John Sampson. A consultation call is free.


Maxx


.       

[ScottinCrimea]

Well Maxx, it sounds like if she has sent in the I-360, there's not much I could have done to prevent it and not much I can do about it now.  If all she really needs is a letter from the shelter, then that's totally out of my control as she can tell them whatever she wants, they can say whatever they want and I would have no way to refute it.  I'm certainly not going to go to the shelter and plead my case.  From what you are suggesting, no matter how I choose to defend myself the abuse petition will be rubber stamped anyway.  In fact, from what I'm reading, I may not even be informed if the petition has been submitted or granted.

I have an appointment at the local field office this week.  Maybe I'll ask them about it and see if they can tell me anything.

[Maxx2]

Scott, below is something I got from John Sampson. You can read it and see the exact situation that you are in.

In regard what you said. You will not be informed that she filed an abuse petition on you. There are strict rules on that. The system the USCIS has is likened to a Star Chamber. Except for the issues I wrote about above you will never be bothered by the USCIS. My advice to you is if you can shrug this off and "move on" then so much the better for you. If you feel like fighting it you can go the route thousands of others have. That is trying to be heard, to present your side and so on. It will not do any good (see below) though. My advice is don't waste your energy. 

You might ask why I don't follow my own advice. Simply I have no time other than work and sitting by this computer to do anything else. I was asked by an attorney in Orlando to be an expert witness for his client ( @ $5,000 plus expenses ) and I just can't do it. I have a few others I suggested instead John Sampson being one of them. Count yourself lucky Scott at least you are not facing a 15 year sentence and a fortune in legal expenses.   



Dave,

Section 384 of the Immigration and Nationality Act (INA) specifically prohibits USCIS from considering any information provided by the "abusive spouse" or their family. . . without corroborating information from an independent source. However the regs that were implemented by USCIS addressing this issue dropped the phrase "without corroborating information from an independent source". So USCIS does not consider anything the 'abusive spouse' has to say, even if it's backed up with documents, etc. The reason is that the "VAWA Unit" considers such reporting as further acts of abuse against the victim

Also from John:


On Mar 8, 2009, at 5:41 PM, John N. Sampson wrote:

All,
 
I had a long talk with Ron last week regarding the proposed reform legislation he is working on. Since that time, I've had some time to digest all of this and I think I have a possible solution. I've discussed this with one attorney who practices immigration law and she is in agreement. I want to float this by another attorney I know who also practices immigration law to get his take. However, here it is in a nutshell.
 
The problem with the system as it exists today is that there is absolutely no impartiality in this process. USCIS in Vermont takes the side of the alien (alien in distress) 100% of the time. Nothing the US citizen says or does is considered. If the US citizen goes to anybody and complains, regardless of how impartial, how thorough an investigation is conducted, the fact that the initial complaint came from the "abusive" US citizen spouse taints the entire process as far as the VAWA unit at USCIS is concerned.
 
What's worse is that the burden of proof for the alien is absolutely minimal, if not non-existent. However, the Board of Immigration Appeals in a decision made many years ago, ruled that the alien has the burden of proof to show that they are entitled to the benefit being sought. It's not the other way around where the government must show the alien is ineligible. That case, Matter of Brantigan (circa 1966), is the mainstay of all immigration matters and has been around for years. See the following link for some amusing and informative reading: http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/cgi-bin/getcase.pl?court=2nd&navby=case&no=966280
 
 
It's as if Matter of Brantigan is not applied once an alien screams "abuse". No evidence is necessary, all they have to do is make the allegation. Due to the ease in which these I*360's and I-751's are approved (based upon an allegation of abuse, oftentimes lacking any form of substantiation other than a self serving affidavit from the alien involved or their friends/family), there is no semblance of logic or the application of existing case law to such allegations.
 
So here's the solution.

From Maxx: John then goes on to tell his proposed solution.

John concludes:
 
In short, it offers the US citizen a venue in which to plead THEIR case, provide THEIR evidence, tell THEIR side of the story. And, unlike a self petition where the alien doesn't have to provide much, if any, evidence of the abuse, in court, they would. It would, in my opinion, make the filing of fraudulent allegations of abuse much more difficult. Furthermore, if the alien loses, the judge orders them deported.
 
Thoughts?
 
John
 
 
John N. Sampson
CSI Consulting and Investigations
303-332-1020
www.csiinvestigations.vpweb.com

And more from John about the big picture:


Immigration Marriage Fraud and VAWA Fraud 101
 
It is estimated that of the 300,000+ immigrant visas issued on the basis of a marriage to a US citizen each year, nearly 30% of them are fraudulent.
 
As a result, there are thousands of American citizens who are viciously  victimized by foreign nationals who will stop at nothing to gain entry into this country. The sad part is that the United States government oftentimes is not willing to assist a victimized citizen in obtaining some semblance of justice, nor are they prepared to protect its citizens from the abuses heaped upon them by foreign nationals who abuse American citizens and the American immigration "system" to get what they want and what they believe they are entitled to as a matter of "right".
 
And thousands of American citizens are the victims of sham or fraudulent marriages perpetrated by cold and heartless foreign nationals seeking the American Dream which creates the American Nightmare for the unsuspecting American citizen.
 
A sham or fraudulent marriage under immigration law is a marriage contracted for the sole purpose of evading the numerical restrictions that otherwise limit immigration into the United States. In Lutwak v. United States the Supreme Court stated that "Congress did not intend to provide aliens with an easy means of circumventing the quota system by fake marriages in which neither of the parties ever intended to enter into the marital relationship . . . . "
 
Government statistics show that between 1978 and 1984 the number of immigrants acquiring status as spouses of United States citizens increased 43% as compared to a total immigration drop of 9.6%. The Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS) estimated that 30% of these spousal relationships were fraudulent.
 
Furthermore, Congress was made aware of the problem by the Immigration Service's discovery of numerous marriage fraud rings around the country and national media attention.
 
There are generally two types of sham marriages. One is the collusive or "contract"' marriage whereby a citizen agrees to marry an alien solely to enable the alien to achieve permanent resident status.
 
There is usually a fee involved for the citizen and an understanding that the marriage will be dissolved soon after the permanent resident status is obtained by the alien. The more blatant cases of this type of fraud have involved marriage "rings"' whereby citizen "spouses"' are supplied along with bogus documents.
 
The second type of sham marriage is a unilateral or "one-sided"' marriage whereby the alien deludes a citizen into the marriage, and upon receipt of derivative status the alien abandons the citizen spouse. It is these one sided marriage fraud schemes that cause the most damage to unsuspecting US citizens and their families. They are abused emotionally, financially, psychologically, and oftentimes, physically.
 
And no one seems to be interested in stopping this heinous crime. In my 27+ year career with USINS and its successor agency, US Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), I have seen hundreds of such victims, wondering what happened and why they were victimized. Many of them equated the abuse they suffered to that of a rape.
 
Enter The Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) of 1994
 
In 1994, Congress enacted the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) which was intended to help address the issue of domestic violence in this country. However, due to the manner in which the law was implemented, it has resulted in an avalanche of false allegations of domestic violence, assault, rape, and other crimes, made by foreign nationals against their US citizen spouses.
 
Since 1994, there have been two subsequent Violence Against Women Act additions. One in 2000 and another in 2005. There is more pending legislation intended to solidify the Violence Against Women Act and make it difficult, if not impossible, to overcome allegations of domestic violence, even if the allegations of domestic violence are fabricated and fraudulent.
 
The question that is often asked by a citizen victim of VAWA fraud is "Why is this happening to me?" The answer is not complicated nor difficult to understand once you look at it objectively.
 
In a cold and calculating move to expedite the process a foreign national goes through to get Permanent Residence (or a "green card"), and in an effort to avoid the possibility of being discovered of having defrauded an unsuspecting American citizen, they routinely and callously falsely accuse their American spouse of domestic violence based crimes such as assault, rape, violation of restraining orders, and other criminal acts.
 
Tying It All Together
 
The motivation to commit such a heinous crime such as falsely accusing someone of a crime of domestic violence they did not commit is simple. Under normal marriage based immigrant visa applications, the expectation is that the parties married for all of the right reasons. They love each other, are attracted to each other, and wish to share their lives. As such, any delay in obtaining a green card for the foreign national spouse is acceptable and is part of the process and is to be expected.
 
However, a foreign national who is using and duping an unsuspecting American citizen into marrying them simply to get their green card, has no intention of sharing their life with the American citizen, is not attracted to them, does not love the American citizen, and wants out of the "relationship" as quickly as possible.
 
The problem that faces such a con artist is that depending on where in the US they are living, it may take from three months to thirty six months to have the required interview with USCIS in which both the citizen and the foreign national must appear. The purpose of the USCIS interview is to determine if the marital relationship is bona fide or if it is a sham. That poses a risk for the foreign national that during the course of the interview, their true intentions may be discovered and they will have their application for their permanent residence denied and they will be placed in removal proceedings.
 
How to avoid the necessity of having that interview and having to live and interact with a person the foreign national does not love, does not want to be with, and oftentimes detests, is the problem facing the con artist. Anything that would alleviate the necessity of living with their US citizen spouse and also alleviate the necessity of having to submit to the required interview, would be welcomed by a deceitful foreign national.
 
The United States Congress obligingly delivered a simple and yet an extremely effective solution to this vexing problem. They enacted the Violence Against Women Act in 1994, and renewed it in 2000, and again in 2005.
 
Now, all the foreign national has to do, once they are married to their American "spouse" is to allege they are the victim of domestic violence or abuse. That allegation can come the day after the marriage, or even on the same day of marriage. It matters not.
 
They no longer have to reside with the US citizen, no longer have to pretend to love them, no longer have to interact with the US citizen, and, most importantly, they no longer have to appear for that inconvenient interview before USCIS. There is no conditional permanent residence status necessitating yet another interview in two years. They become a permanent resident alien in an instant.
 
Virtually all grounds of inadmissibility that would normally prevent a foreign national from getting their green card in a "conventional" marriage based visa scenario, are waived for foreign nationals claiming to have been abused because the foreign national is now a "victim".
 
Lastly, the VAWA unit of USCIS in Burlington, Vermont, issues a self petitioning foreign national who alleges abuse, a letter granting them "deferred action status" which means they cannot be deported or arrested by ICE. It's the mother of all "Get Out of Jail Free Cards".
 
At the same time the US citizen is sitting in jail or prohibited from going to his home because of a restraining order, the foreign national spouse cleans out the American citizen's bank account, takes his valuable possessions, and then has the audacity to claim that they, the foreign national, are the "victim".
 
Meanwhile, the American citizen is forced to hire attorneys to defend himself from the false criminal accusations, and to represent him in the divorce. He faces the bleak prospect of having to give 50% of his property to a con artist who has abused him, taken advantage of him, and has discarded him like yesterday's newspaper. And what is even more distressing is that the American citizen might have to pay her alimony or "spousal support", not to mention the very real possibility of being sentenced to jail or to prison for a crime he did not commit.
 
And if that wasn't enough, the foreign national "spouse" can go on welfare and the US Government, adding insult to injury, will send the American citizen the bill for this because he was so obliging by submitting an enforceable affidavit of support in connection with his foreign born spouse's immigrant visa application or application for adjustment of status. Isn't "love" grand?
 
Another "unintended consequence" of VAWA is that parties to pending divorce actions routinely falsely accuse the other party of domestic violence for no other reason than to gain an upper hand in negotiations regarding the "equitable distribution" of the marital assets, child custody, and child visitation orders and to prevent the other party from obtaining an equitable divorce settlement.

[Admin]

Scott, below is something I got from John Sampson. You can read it and see the exact situation that you are in.

In regard what you said. You will not be informed that she filed an abuse petition on you. There are strict rules on that. The system the USCIS has is likened to a Star Chamber. Except for the issues I wrote about above you will never be bothered by the USCIS. My advice to you is if you can shrug this off and "move on" then so much the better for you. If you feel like fighting it you can go the route thousands of others have. That is trying to be heard, to present your side and so on. It will not do any good (see below) though. My advice is don't waste your energy. 

You might ask why I don't follow my own advice. Simply I have no time other than work and sitting by this computer to do anything else. I was asked by an attorney in Orlando to be an expert witness for his client ( @ $5,000 plus expenses ) and I just can't do it. I have a few others I suggested instead John Sampson being one of them. Count yourself lucky Scott at least you are not facing a 15 year sentence and a fortune in legal expenses.   



Dave,

Section 384 of the Immigration and Nationality Act (INA) specifically prohibits USCIS from considering any information provided by the "abusive spouse" or their family. . . without corroborating information from an independent source. However the regs that were implemented by USCIS addressing this issue dropped the phrase "without corroborating information from an independent source". So USCIS does not consider anything the 'abusive spouse' has to say, even if it's backed up with documents, etc. The reason is that the "VAWA Unit" considers such reporting as further acts of abuse against the victim

Also from John:


On Mar 8, 2009, at 5:41 PM, John N. Sampson wrote:

All,
 
I had a long talk with Ron last week regarding the proposed reform legislation he is working on. Since that time, I've had some time to digest all of this and I think I have a possible solution. I've discussed this with one attorney who practices immigration law and she is in agreement. I want to float this by another attorney I know who also practices immigration law to get his take. However, here it is in a nutshell.
 
The problem with the system as it exists today is that there is absolutely no impartiality in this process. USCIS in Vermont takes the side of the alien (alien in distress) 100% of the time. Nothing the US citizen says or does is considered. If the US citizen goes to anybody and complains, regardless of how impartial, how thorough an investigation is conducted, the fact that the initial complaint came from the "abusive" US citizen spouse taints the entire process as far as the VAWA unit at USCIS is concerned.
 
What's worse is that the burden of proof for the alien is absolutely minimal, if not non-existent. However, the Board of Immigration Appeals in a decision made many years ago, ruled that the alien has the burden of proof to show that they are entitled to the benefit being sought. It's not the other way around where the government must show the alien is ineligible. That case, Matter of Brantigan (circa 1966), is the mainstay of all immigration matters and has been around for years. See the following link for some amusing and informative reading: http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/cgi-bin/getcase.pl?court=2nd&navby=case&no=966280
 
 
It's as if Matter of Brantigan is not applied once an alien screams "abuse". No evidence is necessary, all they have to do is make the allegation. Due to the ease in which these I*360's and I-751's are approved (based upon an allegation of abuse, oftentimes lacking any form of substantiation other than a self serving affidavit from the alien involved or their friends/family), there is no semblance of logic or the application of existing case law to such allegations.
 
So here's the solution.

From Maxx: John then goes on to tell his proposed solution.

John concludes:
 
In short, it offers the US citizen a venue in which to plead THEIR case, provide THEIR evidence, tell THEIR side of the story. And, unlike a self petition where the alien doesn't have to provide much, if any, evidence of the abuse, in court, they would. It would, in my opinion, make the filing of fraudulent allegations of abuse much more difficult. Furthermore, if the alien loses, the judge orders them deported.
 
Thoughts?
 
John
 
 
John N. Sampson
CSI Consulting and Investigations
303-332-1020
www.csiinvestigations.vpweb.com

And more from John about the big picture:


Immigration Marriage Fraud and VAWA Fraud 101
 
It is estimated that of the 300,000+ immigrant visas issued on the basis of a marriage to a US citizen each year, nearly 30% of them are fraudulent.
 
As a result, there are thousands of American citizens who are viciously  victimized by foreign nationals who will stop at nothing to gain entry into this country. The sad part is that the United States government oftentimes is not willing to assist a victimized citizen in obtaining some semblance of justice, nor are they prepared to protect its citizens from the abuses heaped upon them by foreign nationals who abuse American citizens and the American immigration "system" to get what they want and what they believe they are entitled to as a matter of "right".
 
And thousands of American citizens are the victims of sham or fraudulent marriages perpetrated by cold and heartless foreign nationals seeking the American Dream which creates the American Nightmare for the unsuspecting American citizen.
 
A sham or fraudulent marriage under immigration law is a marriage contracted for the sole purpose of evading the numerical restrictions that otherwise limit immigration into the United States. In Lutwak v. United States the Supreme Court stated that "Congress did not intend to provide aliens with an easy means of circumventing the quota system by fake marriages in which neither of the parties ever intended to enter into the marital relationship . . . . "
 
Government statistics show that between 1978 and 1984 the number of immigrants acquiring status as spouses of United States citizens increased 43% as compared to a total immigration drop of 9.6%. The Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS) estimated that 30% of these spousal relationships were fraudulent.
 
Furthermore, Congress was made aware of the problem by the Immigration Service's discovery of numerous marriage fraud rings around the country and national media attention.
 
There are generally two types of sham marriages. One is the collusive or "contract"' marriage whereby a citizen agrees to marry an alien solely to enable the alien to achieve permanent resident status.
 
There is usually a fee involved for the citizen and an understanding that the marriage will be dissolved soon after the permanent resident status is obtained by the alien. The more blatant cases of this type of fraud have involved marriage "rings"' whereby citizen "spouses"' are supplied along with bogus documents.
 
The second type of sham marriage is a unilateral or "one-sided"' marriage whereby the alien deludes a citizen into the marriage, and upon receipt of derivative status the alien abandons the citizen spouse. It is these one sided marriage fraud schemes that cause the most damage to unsuspecting US citizens and their families. They are abused emotionally, financially, psychologically, and oftentimes, physically.
 
And no one seems to be interested in stopping this heinous crime. In my 27+ year career with USINS and its successor agency, US Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), I have seen hundreds of such victims, wondering what happened and why they were victimized. Many of them equated the abuse they suffered to that of a rape.
 
Enter The Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) of 1994
 
In 1994, Congress enacted the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) which was intended to help address the issue of domestic violence in this country. However, due to the manner in which the law was implemented, it has resulted in an avalanche of false allegations of domestic violence, assault, rape, and other crimes, made by foreign nationals against their US citizen spouses.
 
Since 1994, there have been two subsequent Violence Against Women Act additions. One in 2000 and another in 2005. There is more pending legislation intended to solidify the Violence Against Women Act and make it difficult, if not impossible, to overcome allegations of domestic violence, even if the allegations of domestic violence are fabricated and fraudulent.
 
The question that is often asked by a citizen victim of VAWA fraud is "Why is this happening to me?" The answer is not complicated nor difficult to understand once you look at it objectively.
 
In a cold and calculating move to expedite the process a foreign national goes through to get Permanent Residence (or a "green card"), and in an effort to avoid the possibility of being discovered of having defrauded an unsuspecting American citizen, they routinely and callously falsely accuse their American spouse of domestic violence based crimes such as assault, rape, violation of restraining orders, and other criminal acts.
 
Tying It All Together
 
The motivation to commit such a heinous crime such as falsely accusing someone of a crime of domestic violence they did not commit is simple. Under normal marriage based immigrant visa applications, the expectation is that the parties married for all of the right reasons. They love each other, are attracted to each other, and wish to share their lives. As such, any delay in obtaining a green card for the foreign national spouse is acceptable and is part of the process and is to be expected.
 
However, a foreign national who is using and duping an unsuspecting American citizen into marrying them simply to get their green card, has no intention of sharing their life with the American citizen, is not attracted to them, does not love the American citizen, and wants out of the "relationship" as quickly as possible.
 
The problem that faces such a con artist is that depending on where in the US they are living, it may take from three months to thirty six months to have the required interview with USCIS in which both the citizen and the foreign national must appear. The purpose of the USCIS interview is to determine if the marital relationship is bona fide or if it is a sham. That poses a risk for the foreign national that during the course of the interview, their true intentions may be discovered and they will have their application for their permanent residence denied and they will be placed in removal proceedings.
 
How to avoid the necessity of having that interview and having to live and interact with a person the foreign national does not love, does not want to be with, and oftentimes detests, is the problem facing the con artist. Anything that would alleviate the necessity of living with their US citizen spouse and also alleviate the necessity of having to submit to the required interview, would be welcomed by a deceitful foreign national.
 
The United States Congress obligingly delivered a simple and yet an extremely effective solution to this vexing problem. They enacted the Violence Against Women Act in 1994, and renewed it in 2000, and again in 2005.
 
Now, all the foreign national has to do, once they are married to their American "spouse" is to allege they are the victim of domestic violence or abuse. That allegation can come the day after the marriage, or even on the same day of marriage. It matters not.
 
They no longer have to reside with the US citizen, no longer have to pretend to love them, no longer have to interact with the US citizen, and, most importantly, they no longer have to appear for that inconvenient interview before USCIS. There is no conditional permanent residence status necessitating yet another interview in two years. They become a permanent resident alien in an instant.
 
Virtually all grounds of inadmissibility that would normally prevent a foreign national from getting their green card in a "conventional" marriage based visa scenario, are waived for foreign nationals claiming to have been abused because the foreign national is now a "victim".
 
Lastly, the VAWA unit of USCIS in Burlington, Vermont, issues a self petitioning foreign national who alleges abuse, a letter granting them "deferred action status" which means they cannot be deported or arrested by ICE. It's the mother of all "Get Out of Jail Free Cards".
 
At the same time the US citizen is sitting in jail or prohibited from going to his home because of a restraining order, the foreign national spouse cleans out the American citizen's bank account, takes his valuable possessions, and then has the audacity to claim that they, the foreign national, are the "victim".
 
Meanwhile, the American citizen is forced to hire attorneys to defend himself from the false criminal accusations, and to represent him in the divorce. He faces the bleak prospect of having to give 50% of his property to a con artist who has abused him, taken advantage of him, and has discarded him like yesterday's newspaper. And what is even more distressing is that the American citizen might have to pay her alimony or "spousal support", not to mention the very real possibility of being sentenced to jail or to prison for a crime he did not commit.
 
And if that wasn't enough, the foreign national "spouse" can go on welfare and the US Government, adding insult to injury, will send the American citizen the bill for this because he was so obliging by submitting an enforceable affidavit of support in connection with his foreign born spouse's immigrant visa application or application for adjustment of status. Isn't "love" grand?
 
Another "unintended consequence" of VAWA is that parties to pending divorce actions routinely falsely accuse the other party of domestic violence for no other reason than to gain an upper hand in negotiations regarding the "equitable distribution" of the marital assets, child custody, and child visitation orders and to prevent the other party from obtaining an equitable divorce settlement.

Dave,

As you know, John has his own account here (JNSampson). Why are you acting as a proxy for John and re-posting his material?

- Dan

[tfcrew]

It's funny...  My wife reads the horror stories on her Russian woman forum... 

David...
I was wondering which forum that is.
Link?


Also, concerning the resident card expiration ..even if a marriage breaks up,        this can be legally circumvented.

http://foreignborn.com/visas_imm/immigrant_visas/green_cards/2faqs_expiring_green_cards.htm
 
If, however the I-90 is not completed..   travel will be thwarted.
After 5 years of residency, citizenship can be applied for without a spouse co-signing. 
All for now
Good Luck to all
Karl

[Zhena]

You know,she doesnt need to prove the abuse even to get her new GC. There is so called marriage with good intentions,which didnt work. She only has to prove that she stepped into the marriage with the good intentions. Yes,she will get her GC and you can do nothing about.
If you are still married, the petition should be filed jointly by you and the spouse through whom you obtained conditional status. However, you may apply for a waiver of this joint filing requirement if:
1. You entered the marriage in good faith, but your spouse subsequently died;
2. You entered the marriage in good faith, but the marriage was later terminated due to divorce or annulment;
3. You entered the marriage in good faith and have remained married, but have been battered or subjected to extreme cruelty by your U.S. citizen or permanent resident spouse; or
4. The termination of your status and removal would result in extreme hardship.
http://www.uscis.gov/files/form/I-751instr.pdf

[ScottinCrimea]

Also, concerning the resident card expiration ..even if a marriage breaks up,        this can be legally circumvented.

http://foreignborn.com/visas_imm/immigrant_visas/green_cards/2faqs_expiring_green_cards.htm

The information you posted relates to a 10 year green card, not the conditional two year one.

Zhena,  I'm well aware of the conditions by which she can get her 10 year green card.  By far the easiest for her is to claim abuse, get a letter from the shelter, and submit the I-360.  Apparently a letter from the shelter stating that she is there and getting counseling is all that is required in the form of proof.

The funny thing is that I am in full support of her getting her green card and have expressed my willingness to help her in any way.  I believe that the marriage was entered into in good faith but just didn't work out.  I really don't believe that there was some long term plan to use me for her visa.  Unfortunately, she is in the mode of thinking where she sees any help from me as a sign of weakness on her part, and I'm sure the hens at the shelter are convincing her that I would only use the removal of conditions process to control her in some way.

She has a RW friend who actually was a victim of abuse and used this same shelter to get her green card and get back on her feet, so I know that's where she got the idea for everything.

My only concern is what collateral damage she can cause me by claiming abuse.  There won't be criminal charges or any civil action, but it sounds like it will put me on a few lists that could cause problems for me later on.  Still, given the way the system works, there's not a darned thing I can do about it, so no need to thrash about trying to fight it.  It is what it is.

I am somewhat disappointed, though, in her willingness to compromise me to achieve her own goals when it really wasn't necessary.

[Gator]

...and yesterday when I saw her I wondered what I ever saw in her. 

One of those MOMENTS in life. 

I am pleased that you are only disappointed in her and not in yourself.  Things change, much of it beyond your control. 

With this realization that reconciliation is not what you want, you need to file for divorce.   It is a necessary step for moving forward and starting a new life.

Scott, somehow you have retained your composure through all of this and kept your head high.  Admirable.  Wishing all goes as well as can be expected.