How much should the whole process cost?

[ECOCKS]

Bobb:

He is saying he wants to meet and marry quickly rather than spend time (and money) with an email relationship and occasional visits over a 2+ year period leading up to being sure she is "the one".

[remiel6]

I think he's saying he would rather marry a woman quickly and have one good year of marriage that ended in a divorce than spend six months writing and several years flying over to europe to find out if she's "the one". that might be a liberal interpretation, but I might say of all the things in my life i figured i should not rush into getting married is one of them. However, my parents knew each other for  I think a month before they got married and they have been married for 40 years. Still the plans sounds a bit to me like shopping for a wife a walmart

[Sculpto]

I think he wants more than just sex.  He wants arm candy to show off to his friends. 

I maintain this dude should just go and enjoy the party at Arcadia or if he is really smart go to Kazantip.  Somehow I don't think he will follow this advice though.

[BC]

I bought a DVD player for 49.99..

Don't ask me how much I spent since on DVD's.....

[Gator]

I bought a DVD player for 49.99..

Don't ask me how much I spent since on DVD's.....

 

[BrianW]

I think he's saying he would rather marry a woman quickly and have one good year of marriage that ended in a divorce than spend six months writing and several years flying over to europe to find out if she's "the one". that might be a liberal interpretation, but I might say of all the things in my life i figured i should not rush into getting married is one of them. However, my parents knew each other for  I think a month before they got married and they have been married for 40 years. Still the plans sounds a bit to me like shopping for a wife a walmart

Bingo. But first before I expound on that let me apologize for giving the wrong impression of my intentions. First, I wouldn't "dump" an RW after a year. I was saying IF everything failed and we had parted ways, then I had to be prepared for the "worst case scenario".

I recognize that many RW want to come to the U.S. because of the better life that awaits them, rather than staying in their home lands that were ravaged by Communism for eighty years. This makes complete sense to me. I live just outside of Washington D.C. in a VERY wealthy area and the excess here can repulse me at times, knowing that there are so many great people around the world with little or no material posessions. However, I realize it can be unrealistic to stay with the same person for fifty or more years in present times. (Does anyone have stats on 10 year divorce rates between AM and RW?)

I know that my comments earlier made many of you "put me in a box" so to speak, of the desperate, loser that just wants to get "laid" overseas. Well, I can tell you that I am anything but this type. I am the type of person that would rather "make it happen" than write letters, visit three times, etc. before making a decision. I'd also love to have a great life long marriage but realize it could not happen. Maybe this is an ignorant way to be in this process, but I am a newbie and that is why I am in this forum

I kind of feel like if I don't "see the world" then my life will be a waste. I gave up my teenage idealism of trying to "change the world" and using my life to make sweeping, dramatic changes in favor of a more practical and realistic life.

I'm sure many of you think the "one week wonders" are fools and I understand that completely. I'm 26 (actually I'm still 25, but my birthday is in ten days) and I would guess that most of you are much older than I am. I look forward to your advice and learning more about all of you in the next few years.

[Sculpto]

Brian, thanks for expanding on yoru comments.  You will find i this forum that we jump on BS and we will poke holes very quickly in thought patterns.  We aren't always right, but, there ar some very wise people here, even the ones I don't agree with a lot of the time.

I recognize that many RW want to come to the U.S. because of the better life that awaits them, rather than staying in their home lands that were ravaged by Communism for eighty years. This makes complete sense to me. I live just outside of Washington D.C. in a VERY wealthy area and the excess here can repulse me at times, knowing that there are so many great people around the world with little or no material posessions. However, I realize it can be unrealistic to stay with the same person for fifty or more years in present times. (Does anyone have stats on 10 year divorce rates between AM and RW?)

First of all I would get off the idea that women in the FSU are chomping at the bit to come to the USA.  Life isn't so terrible there.  Its not a rosy piece of cake either, but, a lot of families are very close and people do not seem to ascribe to the "disposable friends" syndrome as much as they do in the USA.  If you are from a very wealthy area and have money I would keep quiet about that when you correspond or meet women as it will automatically attract the wrong kind. 

I know that my comments earlier made many of you "put me in a box" so to speak, of the desperate, loser that just wants to get "laid" overseas. Well, I can tell you that I am anything but this type. I am the type of person that would rather "make it happen" than write letters, visit three times, etc. before making a decision. I'd also love to have a great life long marriage but realize it could not happen. Maybe this is an ignorant way to be in this process, but I am a newbie and that is why I am in this forum

It might be worth reconsidering your philosophy that life long marriages are not possible.  If you do not believe in the concept why even try?  It would seem to me that if you don't believe in it you will certainly not get it.  Self fullfilling prophecy kind of thing.

I kind of feel like if I don't "see the world" then my life will be a waste. I gave up my teenage idealism of trying to "change the world" and using my life to make sweeping, dramatic changes in favor of a more practical and realistic life.

I can completely understand your feelings about seeig the world.  But, as you will come to learn from my posts I am disappointed to know that you have lost your idealism.  Back in the day we used to call it selling out to the man.. not sure what it would be termed today.  Maybe you would be better served doing a peace corp stint before trying to find a wife?

I'm sure many of you think the "one week wonders" are fools and I understand that completely. I'm 26 (actually I'm still 25, but my birthday is in ten days) and I would guess that most of you are much older than I am. I look forward to your advice and learning more about all of you in the next few years.

To be honest at your age you are going to have amore difficult time convincing a young woman that you are serious about marriage, and, given yoru stated philosophical position it is going to make it even harder.  In your case trying for one week wonder status is sure to end in divorce, and probably a really nasty one at that.  I know in my own case I was running too fast with a woman younger than you and due to the advice and experience of a lot of guys here I slowed things down and am trying to let things evolve in a more normal fashion. 

There is real value to at least doing some correspondence in advance of going to meet ladies.  Some guys here will advocate for writing to many and visiting many and others writing many and visiting one and others yet writing one and visiting one.  To each his own on that debate, but, the bottom line is you will be taken more seriously if you have some sort of correspondence before you arrive in her city. 

I would advise extreme caution if you have been looking at agency web sites.  Most of them are scams and very few are the real deal.  I know a lot of guys have been giving good recomendations of a interpretor named Mila who is on this site.  I think there are some other people that can help you on the ground as well. 

[Vaughn]

..."ravaged" by Communism, LOL. That the system had its shortcomings is fact; that its
citizens existed as you imply is pretty much off the wall rubbish.

   Brian, I still fail to understand why you feel "make it happen" has its advantages over "take my time"  - and
actually that's where the crowd sensed an impatient horny young man willing to spin the wheel and take
whichever number comes up. Knowing the risks as you profess, it seems as though you're most willing to
approach this the silly way - with impatience, and rapid return on investment your agenda. With this type
of outlook, you're a prime candidate for mule school - and there are plenty of girls ready to take the ride.

I already see it coming.....

[BrianW]

Vaughn,


In polls of overall happiness of citizens of nations, the Ukraine and Russia are pretty low on the world totem poll. (no pun intended)

[Vaughn]

Can we assume you're prepared to cite your sources?

[BrianW]

Here is just one. If you use Google you can find many more.


http://www.le.ac.uk/users/aw57/world/sample.html

[bobb]

I'd rather have a good one year relationship then than write for six months and spend years visiting over and over again.

I see my error.  Who would think one single letter can make such a big difference.

... I wouldn't expect any marriage to fail, I would just plan for the worst case scenario.

My question to that:

I find it very difficult to understand this statement.  I believe if you reach a point you wish to marry another person your plans should not factor in 'worst case scenario'.  I really don't think a person can 'plan' ahead of time what the worst case scenario could be in a divorce.

I would be interested to hear anyone's answer to this.

[remiel6]

I agree with you. I mean I understand the concept of a prenup for certain people, but that being said isn't it a little fatalistic to plan the prenup before you even meet the girl?

[BrianW]

I wasn't planning a prenup, I was just asking as many questions as I could think of. I'm sure many more will come

[Sculpto]

I once had a GF who had a pre-prenup just to date her seriously.  She was heiress to a fortune.  Needless to say I dumped her.  She was a spoiled brat.

[JR]

Let's say someone flew from New York and stayed in Kharkov for two weeks. Found someone to marry, proposed, etc.

How much would it cost to bring her back to New York? Thanks.

Everything you have.....

[kievstar]

Hi BrianW,

I have lined up the first girl for you - she will spend 1 day with you.  Not a joke she is a friend of a friend I know.  She gets a lot of attention so bring your best game.  If you can successfully date her, you will do well in Ukraine.


http://www.loveme.com/women/extraphoto.php?103858&4&Aleksandra

[BrianW]

Kiev,


You're the man. I would give it a shot (although I think she probably isn't my type, but who knows) but I won't be in "town" for a long time Thanks.

[kievstar]

Hi BrianW,  I was just joking.  This is a very bad girl.  I do know her.

[Chicagoguy]

Kievstar

She must have a big heart if she if willing to date guys up to age 75 !!!!  ?

[GoodOlBoy]

Yeah...I haven't seen to many 75 year olds that are "lively" and "active" ? 

Maybe Turboguy could comment on this.  :evil:


GOB

[kievstar]

She is also willing to date girls under her age of 28.  AM love her.  She has a six figure income and a couple of cars as gifts. 

[diverboy70]

Kiev:

Is this the kind of girl that anybody is looking for? I am well aware of the "sponsor system" that works in the FSU. But come on, why not just buy a girl for a week if that is what you are after? And honestly, she is not THAT hot! (at least not in my eyes)

I perfectly understand the girls, if there really are such stupid men out there!!!

[ECOCKS]

Kiev:

Is this the kind of girl that anybody is looking for? I am well aware of the "sponsor system" that works in the FSU. But come on, why not just buy a girl for a week if that is what you are after? And honestly, she is not THAT hot! (at least not in my eyes)

I perfectly understand the girls, if there really are such stupid men out there!!!

Not that attractive to me either. I wouldn't bite on that bait.

[diverboy70]

Buying a car for a girl you do not love is either a sign of low self esteem or too much money Or probably both! 

But what do an avarage guy as me know? I rather use my charm, than buying them cars! If that dont work, they are not for me!