I met a girl under special circumstances

[Sculpto]

FWIW I never did one night stands.  I liked getting to know the ladies I dated and bedded.  I just didn't stick around for very long. 

[Faux Pas]

To the so called moralists.. back in my days of being a player.. the wildest and hottest experiences I had were with uptight people like all of you.  All that repression, once released, is animalistic and wild.  I actually learned to seek out and seduce the most "moral" women I could find.  They were easy because all that nastiness was titiliating.  Just a few strategic words and they were ripping their panties off.  It is alot easy to bang a fundamentalist Christian than an atheist, and, the Christians are a lot kinkier in bed.  FACT  sorry if you are offended by that, but, I see right through your smoke screen of morality.  Most prostitutes will also tell you their kinkiest and most perverted clients are the ones who claim to be the most religious.  FACT  The sweet forbidden fruit.. oh so tasty.

So in essence what you are saying is the more liberal and artistic the person is, the worse the lay? 

[BC]

Wow.. 14 pages and growing as I write.. 3 new replies and I haven't even got to the second sentence..

Sure goes to show that sex sells..

I have read a good part of the posts and think that one point is being missed..

The OP just met the girl and she sounds interesting to him as dating material.

So that's 14 pages worth, probably 15 or more by the time I finish this post?

I've seen guys come on board reporting having dated a good time girl for a few drinks, maybe a few bucks and a fur coat..  Was worth about 3 or 4 posts so what's the fuss..

As far as her bizzness goes, at least if she turns out to be a treat it's an honest treat and not a trick where the guy finds out later, much later, about her background.

She could probably easily pass as a keeper to any unknowing guy.  Contrary to popular belief there is no evidence that anything wears out or stains, albeit some emotional baggage is bound to result, mostly from societal woes. Those that believe they could tell the difference are probably either fooling themselves or packing low caliber weapons and cringe at public pee stalls.

In this guy's shoes I'd say go have fun and see where it leads.

[Faux Pas]

Wow.. 14 pages and growing as I write.. 3 new replies and I haven't even got to the second sentence..

Sure goes to show that sex sells..

I have read a good part of the posts and think that one point is being missed..

The OP just met the girl and she sounds interesting to him as dating material.

So that's 14 pages worth, probably 15 or more by the time I finish this post?

I've seen guys come on board reporting having dated a good time girl for a few drinks, maybe a few bucks and a fur coat..  Was worth about 3 or 4 posts so what's the fuss..

As far as her bizzness goes, at least if she turns out to be a treat it's an honest treat and not a trick where the guy finds out later, much later, about her background.

She could probably easily pass as a keeper to any unknowing guy.  Contrary to popular belief there is no evidence that anything wears out or stains, albeit some emotional baggage is bound to result, mostly from societal woes. Those that believe they could tell the difference are probably either fooling themselves or packing low caliber weapons and cringe at public pee stalls.

In this guy's shoes I'd say go have fun and see where it leads.

Whores and sex industry workers of whatever type can still turn into productive people and good relationship partners IMO. They are or can still be good people albeit a bit more worldly and likely with excess baggage. I couldn't see that happening if the whore remained in the business which is why I see the OP as trying to pee up a rope. I couldn't personally even fathom visualizing a relationship with a woman who was still "in the business". I have never been faced with such a situation to make any kind of reasonable assessment or formulate an opinion so I have refrained from doing so.

JMPO but, such discussions of what "could be" couldn't even be broached as long as she was still peddling her flesh. My only recommendation to the OP would be to enjoy himself with her but do not even consider a future of any kind under the current situation. If she was serious about him she would have already stopped.

[Misha]

albeit some emotional baggage is bound to result, mostly from societal woes

Depends on a number of factors. However, let's say hypothetically speaking that a woman has been a professional prostitute for a decade from the age of 19 to 29. This would mean that a third of her life would have been spent in the profession. I believe that after this length of time, her personality or outlook would have been irrevocably shaped. Our experiences make us who we are. Like it or not, the person she is will have been shaped by her past, and she just can't walk away from it.

[Sculpto]

So in essence what you are saying is the more liberal and artistic the person is, the worse the lay? 

On the contrary.. it takes a creative and LIBERATED person to know how to release the wild animal pent up on the inside of someone religiously or culturally repressed. 

[BillyB]

back in my days of being a player.   All that repression, once released, is animalistic and wild.  Just a few strategic words and they were ripping their panties off. I actually learned to seek out and seduce the most "moral" women I could find.  FACT  The sweet forbidden fruit.. oh so tasty.

While some men search the strip club for a loose woman or even wife, you, going against the grain, go to church to find your easy and loose women and only a player as yourself can bring out the animal in them. Smart. Sculpto, I bet ya half the women reading that has ripped off their panties. lol

Too many right women out there for me to consider a prostitute as a wife. One thing you got right Scupto is that good women, with normal hormones, like sex too. Don't need the bad girls to have good sex. Maybe the OP can handle it but I can't stand the thought of other men from the darkest, lowest places in society doing their business on my woman or in her mouth on a daily or hourly basis. How some of you can keep those thoughts out of your mind and continue to smile thinking of a future life with her is beyond me. :noidea:

If the OP just wanted to have fun with her, he wouldn't come here to ask for opinions, he'd just use her and lose her. He went to visit her and her family in Russia. He's invested time and money to learn if she's a sincere family woman he  could someday marry.

[Faux Pas]

On the contrary.. it takes a creative and LIBERATED person to know how to release the wild animal pent up on the inside of someone religiously or culturally repressed. 

Let me guess, only you and those "like you" are creative and liberated enough? I was about to agree with you. In my days as a player I found those creative, liberated,  morally bankrupt ladies to be sluts, uninteresting and generally unenthusiastic lovers. 

[Turboguy]

Personally if she wants to get out of the profession and lead a more quiet and normal life, more power to her.

If he can accept her past and it won't bother him then he should hook up with her.  If he can't he should just find a woman he is happy with.

There is a saying, practice makes perfect so the odds are he might end up with a sex life that many will be jealous of.  She definately would have had more practice at how to turn on and satisfy a man than most of our wifes.

Hookers come in a wide range of types.   Crack whores to me would be on the low end of the scale and I think women who are in an arrangement where a man supports them in turn for sex is also a whore.  I think women who work in a job and gives favors to her boss to get raises and a better position is also a whore.   Both those things are fairly common in the FSU so it is very likely that some or many of the members here married a woman who was in some form or another a whore but they just don't know it and some of these might be the same members who come down hard on the op's object of interest.  

Actaully I know one woman who posted here for a while a few years ago who in the later days of the FSU had a job as an Italian interpreter.   She got to travel to Italy often, her employer paid her well and helped fund nice clothes for her.  One of her duties as an interpeter was to "entertain" the clients.   She married a guy from the USA who never gave another thought to her past yet what her real profession was could be open to interpretation.

Personally as in age gaps it is what he will accept that is important and what anyone else thinks doesn't matter.

[Sculpto]

LOL Faux.. I was joking.  should have put a smiley..

though.. one of these days I will tell the Mexican bus story.. I will say just one thing about it now.. a lot of Mexicans are conceived on the bus on Sunday nights when returning home from short vacations or visits to parents.  A consequence of the lack of privacy in crowded homes.

[I/O]

I've seen guys come on board reporting having dated a good time girl for a few drinks, maybe a few bucks and a fur coat..  Was worth about 3 or 4 posts so what's the fuss..

The wannabe puritanicals (prolly me included) aways react to a trigger for preaching. GTG's and fur coats = "silly guy, you should have seen it coming" = no trigger. Hooker as a potential life partner = "dirty slut, how could you feel anything for such a low life" = trigger.

[JR]

I'm not sure if Aloe's point reaches to what I think she's leading to.

If prostitution is an act of despicable morality, then what is the difference between a person getting money for sex as opposed to a person paying money for sex. If the act in of itself (money for sex) is wrong then why would it seem only one of the participant is dirty. If it's so wrong, then why participate in the act? A case of chauvinism?

In the US soliciting sex for money is illegal and can land you in jail. Unless you're in certain parts of Nevada.

I don't see any real difference between the roles.

As to why: there are as many reasons as there are people.

[GoodOlBoy]

If she was serious about him she would have already stopped.

I completely agree with you on this Faux Pas.

.....and I think that is why the OP came here (because she hasn't/can't stop).

JMO, BUT....I don't think he really knows what to do.


GOB

[Sculpto]

While some men search the strip club for a loose woman or even wife, you, going against the grain, go to church to find your easy and loose women and only a player as yourself can bring out the animal in them. Smart. Sculpto, I bet ya half the women reading that has ripped off their panties. lol

Too many right women out there for me to consider a prostitute as a wife. One thing you got right Scupto is that good women, with normal hormones, like sex too. Don't need the bad girls to have good sex. Maybe the OP can handle it but I can't stand the thought of other men from the darkest, lowest places in society doing their business on my woman or in her mouth on a daily or hourly basis. How some of you can keep those thoughts out of your mind and continue to smile thinking of a future life with her is beyond me. :noidea:

If the OP just wanted to have fun with her, he wouldn't come here to ask for opinions, he'd just use her and lose her. He went to visit her and her family in Russia. He's invested time and money to learn if she's a sincere family woman he  could someday marry.

Billy.. I never searched churches for women.  College days in the midwest gave ample opportunity to meet very conservative women in lots of different circumstances.  The first time I encountered such a scenario I was really surprised.  I am not ashamed to admit I exploited the theory and found it to be fact later on.  Now, here is an interesting twist.. one of those ladies happened to be one that I stayed with a long time.. in fact, I often considered her "the one that got away".  About 5 years ago I looked her up and found her, recently divorced and living in Vegas.  I went for a visit.. she was just as conservative as ever.. and with just as much pent up.. umm.. energy.  

I can understand your feelings of disgust to try and marry a former sex worker.  I couldn't do it, but not for the same reasons as you.  For me, it comes down to trust, and, I just couldn't trust someone who had chosen that way of life.  However, I highly recommend reading Paulo Coelho's "11 Minutes".  It is a story of a prostitute and is an excellent read.

[Sculpto]

I completely agree with you on this Faux Pas.


GOB

Actually on the contrary.  According to what I have read on the monger forums, hookers usually don't stop until he man proves he is serious.  One thing about hookers.. they are independent.. they do not need ONE man when there are so many who are willing to pay for a little company.  Seems like it should be the other way around.. that they would be happy to find a decent man to help them get out.. but that just isn't the reality.

[Misha]

The wannabe puritanicals (prolly me included) aways react to a trigger for preaching. GTG's and fur coats = "silly guy, you should have seen it coming" = no trigger. Hooker as a potential life partner = "dirty slut, how could you feel anything for such a low life" = trigger.

Trigger? Sorry, don't quite get what you mean here.

[JR]

There are parts of our 'civilized' world where it's OK for men to disown, torture, stone, or even decapitate their daughters, wives or sisters for having committed adultery, promiscuity, or even pre-marital sex, let alone prostitution ~ but why do the men who partake in the act seem to get ignored. Or those who actually carries the punishment?

In the "civilized cultures" you are referring to none of the mentioned actions are what is key. The key is that in those societies women have little to no rights. They are property.

[Sculpto]

http://www.examiner.com/x-662-Strange-News-Examiner~y2009m6d18-Prostitution-legal-in-Rhode-Island-What-happens-in-Pawtucket-stays-in-Pawtucket

[Misha]

One thing about hookers.. they are independent..

And what role daresay do the pimps play in the lives of many prostitutes?

they do not need ONE man when there are so many who are willing to pay for a little company.  Seems like it should be the other way around.. that they would be happy to find a decent man to help them get out.. but that just isn't the reality.

Again, you are romanticizing the life of a prostitute. Here is a good description of their lives based on one psychologists work with patients who were prostitutes:

"Without exception, the girls felt worthless and insecure. Though they paraded in mink coats and made a point of being seen riding in Cadillacs from expensive apartments in the best parts of town, they were forever afraid that the world was ready to laugh at them. To dull their anxiety they sought relief in drink (though none was technically an alcoholic); 15 used marijuana, and six took to heroin. Said one: "Being a call girl helped me overcome my inferiority complex. I used to feel very unattractive to men, but since so many of them want to pay me ... I guess I can't be all that unattractive." Largely because of their uncertainty about father and mother. 15 of the 20 had homosexual relations. None of the girls had any capacity for solid friendships, sought out friends who were unstable because of similar emotional conflicts. Yet they desperately wanted to conform in some outward respects: one joined the D.A.R. and the United Daughters of the Confederacy."

Source: http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,893889,00.html

[Sculpto]

good points Misha..

The women I knew were independent and did not fit those stereotypes.  One of them has gone on to a a successful career as a choerographer which is why she worked int he strip club and took some vacations with men.  Another formed a successful travelling circus troupe and toured around the country.  And several other similar stories.

There was one train wreck also.. but.. I think in that case it had to do with drug use the predated her working in the sex industry.  Its really a sad story in fact.  She was a neighbor.. kind of cute but a bit plump.  Somewhere along the line she got a gig modelling for an artist who apparently messed with her mind regarding her body and she started to lose weight.. at the same time she was experiementing with a lot of acid.  then, she lost her job and tried to get work stripping.. but.. she was already a bit whacked out and couldn't get hired, so, the first trick led to the next and so on.  The process of self destruction took about a year and she ended up in LA County Psych ward after her family and friends staged an intervention. 

I do think the "mythical" pimp is an overplayed character in the sex industry.  Though, I did meet a pimp once.. outside of her business through a mutual friend.  This pimp was female and had a stable of girls that work the casinos in Vegas.  She was really harsh and could be brutal, but, it was weird, she would say it was for the girls own good.  She would say.. the girls were too stupid and irresponsible to take care of business themselves.. so.. if she didn't do it for them they would all end up broke and drug addicted.  She claimed to keep them clean and set up investment accounts for them.. for a percentage of course.  It was weird.. and she had a view of humanity that was exceptionally unpleasant, but, probably and unfortunately true.

[Misha]

good points Misha..

The women I knew were independent and did not fit those stereotypes.

The thing is, based on the article that I cited, the women want to APPEAR independent. They want to APPEAR as if they are happy and will exude pride. They are doing their best to hide their insecurities and inadequacies.

[Stix]

In general and I know there will always be exceptions, does remaining a virgin until marriage carry much significance for FSU women? Or do most most FSU men care much about a woman's sexual history?

[Sculpto]

The thing is, based on the article that I cited, the women want to APPEAR independent. They want to APPEAR as if they are happy and will exude pride. They are doing their best to hide their insecurities and inadequacies.

I understand the point you are trying to make.. but I can assure you it did not apply to the women I am talking about.  I mean, who knows what they told their shrinks, if they had them, but, in that crowd of performance artists, many of whom lived in the same spaces.. ate together every day, performed together over a period of years.. it would be pretty difficult to hide who you really are. 

[Sculpto]

this link is pretty interesting.. odd that Iran would be more liberal about prostitution than the USA.

http://www.sexwork.com/coalition/whatcountrieslegal.html

[Stix]

good points Misha..

The women I knew were independent and did not fit those stereotypes.  One of them has gone on to a a successful career as a choerographer which is why she worked int he strip club and took some vacations with men.  Another formed a successful travelling circus troupe and toured around the country.  And several other similar stories.

From what I've read, sexual favors were pretty much a rite of passage for actresses and actors in the days of the old studio system in Hollywood. Not that it doesn't happen today but in general, with the rise of feminism here, I think women are more resistant to that kind of pressure.