Why Russian women?

[chivo]

I hope I am not going to get into trouble for posting photos without
permission (again)

I took a little video of her (your last AW date)

That was one of my better dates.

It reminds of a scene from the movie Swingers with Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau. Jon's character had just moved to LA from the east coast to try to get into the movie business after breaking up with his g/f.

They were at some party in LA, when Jon sees a couple of women he's attracted to.

He goes over to start a conversation and says to one of the girls, "so, how are you doing?", to which the girl turns her head around to see who it is, and replies without hesitation, "what kind of car do you drive?".

Looking a little bewildered, Jon says, 'um, a Ford Escort, why?". At whch point, the women just walks away without saying another word. Classic.

[Lily]

Pacifica, I enjoy looking at your avatar so much

Please stay and post here. We RW are a bit underrepresented on this forum.  

[GQBlues]

I'm down, Chivo.

Yeah, OC coastal pen rocks! Seal Beach all the way to Capistrano. I made my crib for many years in the laid back city of Marina Del Rey, southside to Freak City USA they call Venice Beach. Grew up In Sta Monica. I'm a Viking by heart and association. My sand box extended from State St., Sta Barbara to Oceanside, CA. Mostly the westside, southbay, Woodyhood and HB.

Anyway, my experience differs, man. Now mind you, I'm short, dark and ugly. But I was born a Rock Star without the musicality and the rock band. I've done the tour way too many times. Just let me say I won't jig with you, there's nothing out there I haven't done. The last time I confided my stories with a board member it blew up in my face. An average RM have nothing on me.

To analogize, take someone like say...Bill Gates. Do you think at this point in his life he's still driven to innovate for the love of money? He's got so much of it he's likely killed every motivation in him to chase a buck. Kali native Joseph Francis started his silliness mostly in LA. But the point of that is something here in LA (OC) exist to make someone like him create the things that he did. Hefner would agree.  

It also begs the question that Pacifica asked; if your dating scene is so rich and full in LA, "why Russian women"? Seems like a lot of time and money wasted/spent on the same thing.

But like Gates, when you have too much of it, or when it comes so easy for you, it gets boring really fast. So much so that you start creating scenarios and combinations to spice things up. Trying so hard to relive and make the chase sweet again. The game became like a drug. I have no fear to join a table full of gorgeous women on a dinner table and can almost always guarantee I can close the deal with the top 2. I'll do it with 'all' just to prove a point. I can remember how many dozen long stem roses I had received at work in my lifetime. There was one day I had 3 delievered but one of them was actually a dozen long stem chocolate chip cookies. These are the AWs I dated. Their independence never really was a challenge or a threat to me.

I remember when AOL chat room became a trend. That silliness took me from Seattle to Naples, FL. My crib became almost like a hostel. Just to do something different, man. But eventually even that got stale.

As for Sculpto's example of smiling women on the streets...Forget the smiles I can get them to flash me their cell number while locked up on traffic on the 405.

Then I started hooking up with women from CE in the mid-90s. Mostly those during their work travel programs. Fun. I swore that I would be married to a Czech woman, so I did my tour there and Slovakia and Hungary. Spent time travelling to and fro and played host to a few. That eventually led me to Russia as I had the crazy idea of heading to places I've never been to before just to chase. I needed something to excite me as I was starting to feel I really need to settle down. I really wanted to fall in love. But I had a problem that in two weeks time I would be bored as hell with whomever I was with regardless how gorgeous she is. At the time it seemed uneventful to simply date for the sake of getting married. I thought I wanted to do something different - and so I did. The rest is history. Would I do it again if given the choice? Not in a heartbeat. Would I go to Russia to simply date? No way in hell..ridiculously far to do so. Luckily, I am blessed and elated that my wife did turn out to be a wonderful woman.

As for Moscow...a spoiled socialite, a lawyer working for the government, a young manager, a VP in a communication co (went to school in USA), one worked in a company located in the hotel I stayed in (Radisson), 3 others that I don't remember the profession any more. One gal would actually call me wice a week even before we met. She's been to Chicago/NY and was a spoiled pup. I remember one who made me believe she spoke English but turned out later she had someone from the US translating our letters and she was paying her. This woman was actually getting products for her dog she couldn't get in Moscow. She even had this woman get her a pair of soes and shirt from the US so she can wear it when I came to visit. Her reasoning is, so she won't feel out of fashion and that I would be more comfortable to see something familiar. A woman from Vladivostok was actually sending me gifts - these all happened BEFORE I even came.

LOL. Dude, what can I say? Women are women.

Enough for now, I'm good where were at..I do remember you a bit more now as the last time I think we exchanged thoughts we also left an open invite. It's still good with me as my brew will be as cold as yours.

Have fun out there, man! Do remember though...it will get old - that, you can trust me on.  

[pacifica]

Pacifica, I enjoy looking at your avatar so much

Please stay and post here. We RW are a bit underrepresented on this forum.  

Thank you, Lily! I am usually more of a reader, than a writer, so I can't promiss to post often. Hopefully, will move to the "Married" section next year 

[groovlstk]

I've never been one to criticize American women, but like Chivo and Misha I found huge differences in dating in the US vs. dating in Russia or Ukraine.

I'm completely open to the fact that my blue passport opened doors for me that would otherwise not be available, but then again I found dating RW living in the US nearly identical to dating overseas. It was just my experience, but I found RW a lot more adventurous and less caring about what their female friends thought of their dates than American women.

This is probably not the best example, but in the aftermath of the massacre at a health club a few months ago in LA, I read the unedited blog posts by the guy who murdered those poor women. It's easy to dismiss him as a lunatic, but what came through his words was how desperately lonely this guy was. I've known men like this - they are fairly handsome, have good jobs, yet when it comes to women they give off a wierd vibe. Maybe they're too eager or they maintain eye contact too long or not enough, or they have a strange laugh - regardless of the reason, they are treated like parihahs in the dating scene.

[Misha]

Hopefully, will move to the "Married" section next year 

I do wish you all the best. I hope you will share your experiences. It would be nice to hear more about a woman's perspective and the challenges she faces while dating. However, if you do not have a fiance, you have a lot to do these coming months if your plan is to be married next year 

[LEGAL]

Please stay and post here. We RW are a bit underrepresented on this forum.  

Gee I wonder why that is Lily 

[pacifica]

I do wish you all the best. I hope you will share your experiences. It would be nice to hear more about a woman's perspective and the challenges she faces while dating. However, if you do not have a fiance, you have a lot to do these coming months if your plan is to be married next year 

Thank you, Misha! I am not planning anything, just hoping And official marriage is not the goal (it's just a piece of paper), finding real love is more important...

[JR]

Hmm, I don't see this thing about "in FSU you can get a date everyday but not here in the west." I have no problems getting a date with a woman the same day I meet her here in the US.
To me the difference is that men become bolder in the FSU than they would ever be in their own back yard.

[RussianWind]

To me the difference is that men become bolder in the FSU than they would ever be in their own back yard.

Exactly. Spoiled with attention.

[Daveman]

Thank you, Misha! I am not planning anything, just hoping And official marriage is not the goal (it's just a piece of paper), finding real love is more important...

I still like the description put forth by our profundity laden Italian Philosopher... "Marriage is a container for a relationship..."

IMO, too many (men at least) in this pursuit seem to view this as 'finding a wife' (or husband) and seem to miss the important building blocks of natural relationship growth and maturity.  Perhaps a matter of semantics but with some of the approaches and stories we read, it seems too many put the horse before the cart.

Glad to see your focus is on finding real love...

good luck!
Dave

[Daveman]

Hmm, I don't see this thing about "in FSU you can get a date everyday but not here in the west." I have no problems getting a date with a woman the same day I meet her here in the US.
To me the difference is that men become bolder in the FSU than they would ever be in their own back yard.

I agree to a point... when meeting ladies at the local supermarket or at the mall here, I don't have much problem getting dates, however, when i decided to branch off into "Online Dating" to try to find a real match to my personality, etc., rather than only the chance encounter odds of a match, I did have tons of weird responses from ladies in the US, at least on the sites I used .. match, eHarmony, etc..  There does seem to be a significant difference between chance encounters and online matching.. at least there was for me. 

[Misha]

Hmm, I don't see this thing about "in FSU you can get a date everyday but not here in the west." I have no problems getting a date with a woman the same day I meet her here in the US.

Then, there is the question of what happens on the date you happen to get. I did meet one wonderful woman while dating locally, we had a first date, and then nothing. The impression that I got is that she enjoyed first dates way too much  :evil: As she was somewhat attractive, she had no problem getting many first dates and she had the pleasure of being very selective. In Russia, the tables were turned and I was the one who could have many dates and be picky  

So, JR, if you can get so many dates with AW, why are you still hanging around a RW discussion forum  :evil:

[GoodOlBoy]

To me the difference is that men become bolder in the FSU than they would ever be in their own back yard.

Exactly. Spoiled with attention.

Yes, exactly.

Welcome to the Russian Man's (RM) world!! :evil:

Men spoiled and surrounded by A LOT of beautiful FSU women. 


GOB

[Misha]

IMO, too many (men at least) in this pursuit seem to view this as 'finding a wife' (or husband) and seem to miss the important building blocks of natural relationship growth and maturity.

Seems we had this conversation before. All a matter of perspective. Others might say that some men enjoy dating a bit too much and are seemingly incapable of starting to lay any blocks as required to build any relationship  :evil:

[GoodOlBoy]

Others might say that some men enjoy dating a bit too much and are seemingly incapable of starting to lay any blocks as required to build any relationship  :evil:

I would be one of those "others".

It is very difficult for me to conceive of anybody making 20 or 30 lengthy trips to the FSU and having NO luck in his search (if he really is "searching" ).


GOB

[pacifica]

The impression that I got is that she enjoyed first dates way too much  :evil: As she was somewhat attractive, she had no problem getting many first dates and she had the pleasure of being very selective.

What's the fun of having many first dates?

[SANDRO43]

I still like the description put forth by our profundity laden Italian Philosopher... "Marriage is a container for a relationship..."

Took me a while to figure you were referring to me , but since I'm the only Italian around...

[Misha]

What's the fun of having many first dates?

Well, many men put more effort into impressing a woman on a first date. They will bring her to the fanciest restaurant they can afford. I presume it can be an ego boost when you have so many people trying to impress you  

[Faux Pas]

What's the fun of having many first dates?

So many men as well as women seem to constantly seek the BBD (bigger, better, deal). Years ago I caught myself doing the same thing and once I discovered that is exactly what I was doing, it infuriated me.

[JR]

So, JR, if you can get so many dates with AW, why are you still hanging around a RW discussion forum  :evil:

Uh....I work mon-fri in the evenings, I have my toddler daughter every weekend and have great difficulty pawning her off to some baby sitter (I cherish my time with her, even if it's just watching her sleep. You wouldn't believe how many photos I have of her sleeping , I luv that sexy Russian accent, I was married to a Russian woman for 10.5 years and last but not least "Once you go FSU you'll never go back!"

[Jooky]

I agree with GQ to the extent that dating isn't that hard or different in the US. I agree that 'women are women' in that there are all kinds of women everywhere, basic laws of attraction are the same, games can be played anywhere and the qualities that make a woman a better companion, lover or wife are no better or worse in general in Russia than anywhere else.

Dating in the US can't be too tough. Men find girlfriends and get married just like anywhere else (more than in most countries if you follow the statistics), even the men right here on this board. 

Still, I find dating in Russia easier and more enjoyable than in back in the US of A. It's hard to put my finger on exactly why. A friend of mine in Moscow once told me that Russian women grow up learning how to act towards a man so they can get what they want from him. Another told me that if a woman wants a good man, she needs to treat men in a way to please them. Maybe it's this attitude that makes a world of difference?

In reality I've met very different kinds of women in Russia, so I'll throw out some semi-connected thoughts and observations.

I can't remember a smile drawing a scowl in California. Women at least are friendly enough to smile back in my experience.

Internet dates in the US for me were typically a quick chat or email exchange, talk on the phone and meet that day or the next day. Lining up dates wasn't a problem. Lining up good dates was.

There are all kinds of women everywhere, but it's a numbers game and depending on what you're looking for you're better off looking in a specific place. If you're looking for a vegetarian, San Francisco is a good place to look. If you seek a devout Christian, look in the Bible Belt and avoid San Francisco. I've never met a sports fanatic woman in Russia, but I've met plenty back home (and I have no interest in sports).

I've found a few qualities more common in Russia than in California: A distinction between men and women's roles in a relationship or household. An emphasis on style, fashion and keeping fit and attractive. Following of specific customs and traditions.

Some basic laws of attraction work slightly different in different parts of the world. For example, I'd say many women anywhere are attracted to a man who is in style. In one place fashion dictates sporting a shaved head and a goatee. In another a leather jacket and pointy shoes is attractive. Some men are misfits within their own environment and fit better somewhere else.

I was watching a show on VH1 called the Pick Up Artist. The most interesting thing wasn't the fact that average Joes taught to be attractive and confident could learn to pick up on women. It's the process of picking up women itself that made me think. Even the slickest pick up student met resistance when when approaching women on the street. A woman's natural reaction reaction seemed to be to put up a barrier. The pick up artist's job was to break that barrier down, and quick. The game was not to win over women by chasing, but to make yourself the challenge so that the women chase you. It works, but in Russia the game is not the same. As I mentioned above, you often don't need to break down that initial door, it's already open.

An interesting note: In the introduction of the book "The Game", the master Pick-Up Artist of this show, famous for banging hot chicks and celebrities undergoes a serious breakdown after the inconceivable happened,  the master was dumped... by a Russian woman.

GQ mentioned the challenge, the fun of the chase and how it got to easy in the US. I can't believe he found meeting women in Russia to be a challenge at all. 

The least challenging dating experience of my life was meeting women on Elena's Models last summer. In Novosibirsk I picked the few profiles that interested me and met all but one woman that same week. I just can't do that in the US.

If I get on match.com, no matter how smooth I am, a good number of women are going to look at my height, age and photo and pass me up before reading a single word I've written. On a Russian dating site I get around a 50% response rate.

Go into a night club in the US and the male to female ratio is 50/50 at best, and you'll see plenty of fat chicks these days. I hadn't gone out on the town in a few years until this past month. I was shocked at the number of fat women on the dance floor, right here in Tahoe. It wasn't like this a few years ago. Maybe it was a special heifer's drink free night. Go to a night club in Russia and until past 2 or 3 in the morning, there are always many more women than men. Fat girls are nowhere in sight. It's a different scene.

In all my years of meeting women in the US and Europe, I met only one I considered marrying, and only a few I would have liked to know more seriously but they were taken. In five years of meeting women in Russia, I've met several I've considered marrying and many I would have liked to know deeper, but I was taken. If I had met some of these women 15 years ago, I would have tied the knot without hesitation. The exact reason for this, I don't know. It is what it is.

That's my ramble for the day. I'll end this with one final thought.

We're discussing dating, but most men aren't going to Russia to date, they're looking for a wife. In terms of finding a better wife, I haven't seen any evidence that Russia is any better than the US. Surely there are more open doors for the average guy, but what they find behind that door more often leads to disaster than it leads to bliss. So, be careful out there!

[Misha]

I agree with GQ to the extent that dating isn't that hard or different in the US.

Dating in the US can't be too tough. Men find girlfriends and get married just like anywhere else (more than in most countries if you follow the statistics), even the men right here on this board. 

Can't speak about the United States, but can share my observations about Canada.

In Canada, dating is easier when you are young. When you are in university or college and surrounded by young single women, it is easier to date. Once you hit your thirties, it is much harder. At that point, many women are of course no longer single. Also, your venues for finding eligible women are different: work can be problematic and that is where you may be spending most of your time.

There are also regional differences. If you live in one of Canada's very large cities, you will find many more women than smaller industrial cities.

It also depends on what you are looking for in a partner. If you are willing to date women older than you, aka cougars or divorced women in their forties, and are somewhat attractive, then you won't have any problem at all finding dates anywhere in Canada. If you want to date women your age or younger, in some cities that might be challenging as the number of men chasing the same women will be higher than the number of eligible women. Then, if you are interested in finding a woman that you find attractive, that is even more difficult.

So, to summarize, not all dating in Canada is equal. If you happen to be in one of those locations where dating is bad, you either have to make many compromises or look elsewhere.

[Gator]

It also depends on what you are looking for in a partner. If you are willing to date women older than you, aka cougars or divorced women in their forties, and are somewhat attractive, then you won't have any problem at all finding dates anywhere in Canada. If you want to date women your age or younger, in some cities that might be challenging as the number of men chasing the same women will be higher than the number of eligible women. Then, if you are interested in finding a woman that you find attractive, that is even more difficult.

A couple of questions based on my thinking that because of birth statistics and random selection from a large gene pool everything is balanced equally between males and females in our youth.  The number of "attractive" and "intelligent"  males is the same as  the number of "attractive" and "intelligent" females. 

1.  Why would the former stay in their small city and the latter move to a large city? 

2.  Why are divorced females not dating divorced males in the same age group?

I dated in my mid-30s and late-50s.  I never had a problem meeting attractive American women my age.  In my late-50s most AW bored me.   In contrast RW were far more interesting.  I admit that much of this was novelty at first.  Nevertheless, when the novelty wore off, an abundance of substance and spirit was there to excite and energize my emotions.

[RussianWind]

2.  Why are divorced females not dating divorced males in the same age group?

Hmm where do you take it from?
Are they looking for younger or older?