Tashkent.....Finally!

[I/O]

I have to ask, what is this  .....

A reference to this............... http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=11207.0

[Donhollio]

Hey Donhollio, how you doing?

On a different matter, but since this is your most recent post, the person you recommend in Odessa for flats, Matt, I have used your link and it's not working or there is some problem.   www.odessarentaflat.com    Maybe the site is down or agency oob.

Donhollio would you PM or email me?

 Can't do that PM thing Jack.  You can email me donhollio@hotmail

[Ranetka]

Just wanted to say I agree with I/O and BF in many respects....

[Ade]

Not to jump on the bandwagon JR but IO is right in a lot of things. I've been somewhat surprised for some time that you haven't been snatched up by a class act from SPB or Moscow. Maybe it's your sucky sense of humour that's prevented it?

If were you I'd take BF up on her offer of introducing you to a clever atheist chick. Seriously.

[Misha]

I agree with what others have said and notably the point made by Boethius. If she was really interested in you, I can't imagine that she could have found some way to take a day or two off to go see you or have you travel a few hundred kilometers to go see her in person. The question you might want to ask is whether you are repeating a pattern. I may be wrong, but seems to me that there might be similarities between "K" and your ex (based on what you have written): aloofness, putting her interests first, not really seeking compromises. I may be wrong, but you might be unwittingly seeking out a similar type of woman. IMHO, given your looks and age, it should not be that hard to date in the FSU. 

[JR]

Thanks to everyone for your replies. I won't be able to address everything written but I'll hit the ones that hit the most

I/O and BF: Thanks for the objective and constructive critiques. I have no Knight In Shining Armor Complex. I did have one (big time) my first time around, know it's trappings quite well and am confident I have eliminated that infectious disease from my person.

As far as for her motives and truthfullness I can only say that thus far the 'real' evidence I have seen with my own eyes (apartments, addresses, phone numbers, photos, people, etc.) tends to support her story. Her story about the travelling vet may or may not be true. I have no evidence one way or the other. I am trying to reserve judgement until I do. If I see that her passort has a stamp for Dubai during the period she was supposed to be in Tajikistan then I'll understand she was indeed taking care of two-legged stallions as I/O suggests.

I am confident I am not head over heels for this woman. I have not written to her since my return. I wrote a couple brief emails to her sister in law thanking them for the hospitality, shared a few photos I took of us while there and called maybe three times to inquire of K's status. I am still searching and consider that I have put her somewhere near the back burner. I am not ruling her out but I am putting more energy into other avenues at this moment. If the communication becomes regular and transparent upon her return I'd consider moving forward with another visit. I have settled on the belief that planning another trip now would be wasteful, instead I'm adopting a wait and see attitude. Too many times I have judged people quickly with thin or fabricated evidence and I am trying to eliminate that tendency from my life.

S/J: I have a keenly developed sense of humor. It should be obvious, after all, I can laugh at you......)))

I have steered clear of women from Moscow, perhaps because I married a Muscovite and there is still a bad taste in my mouth from it. For some reason I tend to view women from Moscow, Pi tr, Kiev and Odessa as insincere. Probably just my perceptions and bias.

Oh and BraveGirl, If I had met you in person, felt that you are sincere, believed you and you told me about your sick mother who is unable to pay her bills you'd probably get a check from me.

P.S. anyone who gets to be introduced to one or any of BF's friends is fortunate in my book. )))

[brave girl]

Oh and BraveGirl, If I had met you in person, felt that you are sincere, believed you and you told me about your sick mother who is unable to pay her bills you'd probably get a check from me.

Yes, but on the other side, you did not meet this girl.
Yet she is deep into your pockets!! :evil:
Understand??  brave girl

[I/O]

For some reason I tend to view women from Moscow, Pi tr, Kiev and Odessa as insincere.

A seriously flawed generalisation as is the thinking that searching chicken sheds insures sincerity. Reality is, I've seen about equal levels of desperation in both parts of the FSU. Once you dabble in desperates, you're playing with fire which only does two things, eventually dies or burns you and very often both.

[BillyB]

I have not written to her since my return. I wrote a couple brief emails to her sister in law thanking them for the hospitality, shared a few photos I took of us while there and called maybe three times to inquire of K's status

How long has it been since your return? Although you haven't written K, has K written you? Has her family responded to your emails expressing gratitude? Some people questioned the quality of the family. How they respond to your generosity and your emails will shed some more light on what type of people they are.

[JR]

I quite agree with you I/O. It is a generalisation and one that is of course unfounded. It is only that this is how I perceive things. I am quite open to the likelihood that I am wrong. However I still pass right by anyone from Kiev, what can I say, it is a strong impression.

I am not looking for desperate and as you say, most correctly I might add, desperate can be found anywhere and the destination is almost always Disasterville. In fact, until K came along in Tashkent I had not searched in any of the "Stans" nor would I respond to someone from them. The person she presented in her profile caught my eye and I decided to go with it and see where it lead.

Ha ha, touche BraveGirl...I should have said if I had met your family))) But I don't consider what I have given to her and or her family to be deep into my pockets. A few hundred dollars up front is nothing compared to the hundreds of thousands it will cost to untangle myself years down the road. If she starts asking for money in every contact she'll be gone in short order.

The main problem right now is one of patience. I don't have any and am feeling myself starting to move on.

As this tale unfolds, or unravels ))) I'll keep you all posted

[facetrock]

  Brave Girl. Is it possible for you to make a comment about anything else besides money?

[brave girl]

Ha ha, touche BraveGirl...I should have said if I had met your family)))

Sorry but I do not want to be rude. 
I would NEVER have the strange man met my Mum and colleagues.
It is impossible!!  brave girl

[Maniac999]

  Not only a warm ''meeting'' of a strange man approx. age of parents , but ''milking'' him for money.looks like a family business in there:-)))

[Jumper]

amoungst all the conjecture ,

 most fail to remember a pretty important thing..

"K"  told JR,plainly NOT to come at this time ..
and repeatedly ..
and asked him specifically to wait until ..may? or summer.

obvioulsy JR,,, pushed on anyway, takes responcibilties for his own actions in that,
 and of course gives her a bit more benefit of the doubt, afterall it's  a pretty poor plan ,by someone insincere ....


 I have more doubts around the fact that in the past he had  trouble staying in contact with her,(the *whys* behind that) than anything regarding this trip.

[brave girl]

  Brave Girl. Is it possible for you to make a comment about anything else besides money?

Do not be foolish.
It is ALWAYS about the money!!  brave girl

She has a 4yr. son who has never met his father. When she discussed with this man the possibility that she may move to the US, he talked about a "pay off" as a way of making things run smoothly, by not contesting it.

[Andrew]

Do not be foolish.
It is ALWAYS about the money!!  brave girl

Damn!! think I just fell in love 

[GQBlues]

Yeah...late chiming in here, but....

IMHO, I agree in what the others said in this thread. If you have to tuck your shirt in wearing jeans, make sure it's a low-rise jeans and the shirt need to be 'fitted'. Wide belt / big buckles. Crumped for coolness.

Otherwise, you'd look stiff and dweebish. Contrary to what many seem to believe, donning untucked shirt doesn't denote you're a double-double burger with extra cheese chaser.

But that's OK, even David Beckham struggles with such fashion faux pas now and then...

[Maniac999]

 

[JR]

I did give a lot of thought to trying to bribe my way into Tajikistan to find K but it was a moot point as my passport was stuck in the registration office, damn beaurocrats.

There are many things which I have chosen to not relate at this time as I simply don't have enough evidence to go beyond paranoia. When there is enough circumspectial or direct evidence I will not look the other way. There is enough evidence to keep me from jumping to conclusions about the meaning of what I experienced in Tashkent and I am giving a healthy dose of the benefit of the doubt.

[blablabla]

I see how really you are mistaken, I know the people about which you speak. You speak about veterinaries's family, not so it? The K's mum has cured my Dog (terrier) and K helped to her to make operation. JR, why you don't trust to the people? Why do you so strange write? It is so ridiculous, all that you have written!!! Yours comments about Tashkent are disgusting!!! I am a little glad, that you have not met K personally, as maybe you wanted to make love with her but for her family it is not good. As then you go in America and also you will forget about K and find the next girl, am I right? I lived in Tashkent many years back and I know this family and I know the traditions there. But I see and I understand. As far as you yourself mercenary as you mention about some hundreds of dollars. Tell me, how much K should you and personally you??? I will send back to you your dirty money! Also, I can suppose that you have left with presents, am I right? Write and relate about all, what presents have presented for you. I think, that this family has not remained in a duty to you, JR, Will be considerately in the next time, when you will write about the people which you never know!!! Good luck!!!

[BillyB]

blablabla, it's hard to understand your written English. Maybe it's possible you don't understand what JR wrote entirely. I don't see him writing anything bad about the family he visited and if anything he is more forgiving of the meeting that never happened compared to most people here.

[Maniac999]

Old trick.
JR, give this person your contact informaton to compensate that money, and she ( he) will disappear !

[Seeker]

blablabla, it's hard to understand your written English. Maybe it's possible you don't understand what JR wrote entirely. I don't see him writing anything bad about the family he visited and if anything he is more forgiving of the meeting that never happened compared to most people here.

I have to agree with BillyB on this one... JR took full responsibility for things not working out, it was his choice to take the chance.  And when it didn't work out, he knew it was because of his decision.  And as far as any money... he did not think it was a big problem, though others here did.  Of course we weren't there, he was.  And it seemed to me that he had a good time even if it wasn't what he had hoped for.

[Seeker]

Old trick.
JR, give this person your contact informaton to compensate that money, and she ( he) will disappear !

I am not sure what is happening here... this has been a very confusing story from the beginning.  But there is no reason to assume bad intent.  Maybe when JR shows up he can help make sense of it.  But for now, I think we should reserve judgment.

[Ade]

I have to agree with BillyB on this one... JR took full responsibility for things not working out, it was his choice to take the chance.  And when it didn't work out, he knew it was because of his decision.  And as far as any money... he did not think it was a big problem, though others here did.  Of course we weren't there, he was.  And it seemed to me that he had a good time even if it wasn't what he had hoped for.

But it just goes to show, no matter how anonymous people think their trip reports are, there is always a chance that someone will come along and know exactly who and what is being talked about and not necessarily like it. The world and the net is a very small place these days.