New guy in need of direction

[BC]

I think it's fairly safe to say that no one that comes to this board profits by hearing what they want to hear..

[Aliya]

A lot of you think you have me all figured out. That's fine. I'm going to keep my cool and take all the useful information I can from this forum whilst ignoring the more negative stuff, helpful as it may supposedly be.

Its a right thing to do. I noticed that some of the veterans would try to make you feel uncomfortable even if they dont really know whats going on. Just stay out of arguing, let people talk as much as they want. All forums are alike. You know what you want, just stay on your way and collect all the useful information your can get, avoid arguing, there is no true in it:) I dont doubt your personality and most of the people in here dont doubt it too. I like the way you think a lot, im sure you're gonna find what you're looking for. Stay cool

[I/O]

im sure you're gonna find what you're looking for.

Frankly, I don't think he has a snowflakes chance in hell but that doesn't make him a bad guy.

[brad5959]

Frankly, I don't think he has a snowflakes chance in hell but that doesn't make him a bad guy.

why the negativity??  why are his chances so bad, when compared to your chances when you started your search?  please enlighten me and the OP and reveal what made your strategy so superior to his.

[I/O]

reveal what made your strategy so superior to his.

My strategy? LOL, what strategy? Never had one, didn't need one, wasn't searching, didn't have Skype, didn't have a webcam, didn't have a dream, didn't have a translator, didn't have a dictionary, didn't have forums, didn't have a wife vacancy and didn't have a flea up my bum.

What I did have by the time I became interested in one particular RW was some on the ground experience, quite a bit actually. I have and will continue to advocate a trip or two before chasing women there.

[brad5959]

so you didn't have a strategy, etc. etc. etc.  didn't have forums.  than why are you here, other than to be negative??  what is your purpose?  you also say you advocate a trip or two before chasing women.  were you there on business, and than met a woman you like??  if that's the case, why don't you mention that up front, instead of just being negative and beating down somebody else's dream?

[I/O]

why don't you mention that up front

A couple of thousand posts or more is pretty much "up front" I'd suggest. Am I required to write a detailed preamble to any comment so the retards of this world can put everything in some sort of personal context? Would you like me to leave?

[Aliya]

A couple of thousand posts or more is pretty much "up front" I'd suggest. Am I required to write a detailed preamble to any comment so the retards of this world can put everything in some sort of personal context? Would you like me to leave?

Posting more polite things will do. We're very glad that you're so proud of yourself for not having any strategy or using forums ect ect but dont you think that all people are different and every one has his own way?

[Kuna]

fabio,

People give advice here to help others achieve what they have achieved.  When receiving advice, you really need to filter it by what the person has achieved. 

If you can't understand that, you're in for a world of pain.

You will note I've not give you any advice since you objected early on because I suspected you weer the type who would enjoy warmth instead of reality.  I can't lie to you so I won't give you the warm and fuzzies based on what you've written so far.

If you have not considered how hard this really will be,  and you think it has been harsh advice in here so far,  you really are in for a hell of a tough time.

Those sending PM's instead of posting in the open forum are disingenuous, but they are telling you what you want to hear.  If their advice was any good they would test it in the open forum, instead they are serving an ulterior motive. 

I went through the same thing as you when I first joined RWD.  There were a couple of hard-asses who were obviously experienced, but damn they made it uncomfortable at times.  There were others who were nice guys with "good" advice.  It clicked for me just before leaving for my first trip and listened to the hard-asses, and I found my wife, married her and now have two beautiful children.  I note most of the nice guys have faded away without ever marrying.

The only real mistake I made on my first trip came from the advice of a "nice guy"...  not a big mistake,  but potentially costly.

I've said it before, and I'll say it to you now,  your probability of success depends on who you listen to,  those who make you feel good,  or those with proven outcomes.

Roll the dice and enjoy the outcomes!

Sincere best wishes.

Kuna

[Handycam72]

A couple of thousand posts or more is pretty much "up front" I'd suggest. Am I required to write a detailed preamble to any comment so the retards of this world can put everything in some sort of personal context? Would you like me to leave?

Whats up with you, get out the bed the wrong side today?

You maybe shocked to hear this, but not every member on this board knows your background, you ain't that important, except in your own mind of course 

[Kuna]

Quote from: Sculpto on 09 July 2010, 14:52:32
Ukraine has more people willing to leave for the wrong reasons.  IMO.  There would always be some lingering doubt in my mind.. "does she really love me or did she really want to get out of Ukraine?"  With Russia, that really isn't an issue.. people aren't lining up to leave like they used to. 

I have not seen this challenged by those who have dated/prospected in both countries.  I am not sure I would say Ukraine has women with more reason to leave than Russian Sculpto, but my volume of expertise in dating in both countries is less than others.  Perhaps you can expand (for those who worry about off topic in this response to comment, maybe worth another thread) I do agree with a friend who has a lot of exposure to both countries and different regions of both countries that each area has a different "vibe" which might influence why you would choose one area over another.

For example--Manhattan, Miami, Chicago, and San Francisco are all unique American cities, you might find the same for Moscow, Odessa, Kyiv, and St. Petersburg as having unique cultures from each other in FSU.

We tend not to question the more misguided posts in here. 

Look at the results of the posters and then measure the worthiness of their posts.

[I/O]

Whats up with you, get out the bed the wrong side today?

Why ask? I'm not important remember.............

you ain't that important

[I/O]

We're very glad that you're so proud

Pride doesn't come into it, reality does.

every one has his own way?

My comment which seems to concern you was that the OP has nothing right now and if his heat is rising so much over the possiblity of a Web cam / Skype conversation (oh the drama of it all), he hasn't a hope of going anywhere in this pursuit but hey, remember, it's my opinion and if you (or others) don't share it, I'M OK with that. Must I be not OK with your opinion because you are NOT OK with mine? Slight hypocricy here I suggest. 

[Shadow]

Fabiodriven, if you see old members telling you to watch out or other "negativity" then remember that the reason they tell you has nothing to do with who you are.
You noted that people have no idea of who and how you are in real life, and can only comment on what you write. From that you should take what is useful, not just what you agree with.

Old members can be harsh in their words, but that is mostly because they have seen many guys come in with the attitude you display, and end in a train wreck. It gets harder and harder with each case to tell the same thing politely knowing the chances of the guy actually listening are close to zero.

Don't become paranoid. Don''t use what people tell you here, on open forum or in PM, as the golden thing to do. But take everything in to consideration, regardless if you like it or not.

[Shadow]

so you didn't have a strategy, etc. etc. etc.  didn't have forums.  than why are you here, other than to be negative??  what is your purpose?  you also say you advocate a trip or two before chasing women.  were you there on business, and than met a woman you like??  if that's the case, why don't you mention that up front, instead of just being negative and beating down somebody else's dream?

If you or anyone else is interested in a members history, you can check their posts from their profile, or search on topics they started.
While some of the members are ancient, not many have reached the level where every point they wish to make is preceded by a historical account of their life and virtues.

[brad5959]

A couple of thousand posts or more is pretty much "up front" I'd suggest. Am I required to write a detailed preamble to any comment so the retards of this world can put everything in some sort of personal context? Would you like me to leave?

you can tell a big man by how he treats little people.  in light of that, you are not a big man, just a jerk who refers to new people as retards.  since you claim you did not need forums when you started out, than why do you so desperately need it now, other than to stroke your gigantic ego?  I don't care if you stay or go, I have no control over that.  I just care whether or not you might try using some diplomacy when responding to a new persons dreams of finding a foreign wife in Ukraine or Russia. 

[I/O]

you are not a big man, just a jerk who refers to new people as retards.

Are you new? Sorry I didn't notice, my bad.

I just care whether or not you might try using some diplomacy when responding to a new persons dreams of finding a foreign wife in Ukraine or Russia. 

Again, I'm OK with your opinion, don't agree with it for the most part but OK with it. Perhaps you might be "diplomatic" enough to learn to be OK with other opinions?

While some of the members are ancient

"Low Blow" Shadow, none of us look a day over 35, just read the 100's of posts attesting to that.

[Kuna]

you can tell a big man by how he treats little people. 

 

I really want to see this very noble motto put into action in FSU.



Please,  fabio,  do yourself a favour - find a thick skin.  This is not a journey for the faint hearted!

[BC]

My strategy? LOL, what strategy? Never had one, didn't need one, wasn't searching, didn't have Skype, didn't have a webcam, didn't have a dream, didn't have a translator, didn't have a dictionary, didn't have forums, didn't have a wife vacancy and didn't have a flea up my bum.

I/O,

What many do not understand is that relationships, even with RW can and do form under quite 'normal' circumstances without the aid of third parties or artificial means.  The number of such unions are not minuscule, nor rare and my overall impression is that over time they may fare better.  Their long term presence on these boards support my theories.  I visited my first board, RWG 8 years or so ago simply searching for immigration information.

I never dated with the intention of marriage and the more I hang around, the more I am convinced that marriage should be a natural result and not a goal.  Talking babies on the first date is a relationship killer for me.

Fabio,

Yes, this small group of men that includes I/O, jb and quite a few others who are often perceived to be 'hard asses' or 'pickle barrel' boys and there probably is a reason for that..  Most are very well travelled, have had long term interactions with 'foreigners' or even lived among them in foreign lands.  Although I can't speak for them all, the thought of some whippersnapper with a fresh off the press passport thinking he can pull this off easily, or worse RW hype believer seeking instant satisfaction, indeed makes us cringe a good bit.

Is it unfair to be a bit harsh with someone who is blindfolded but insists on crossing a busy 4 lane highway?

None of these guys and gal's are here just to piss you off.  They care about you and others a lot more than you think.
  

[I/O]

What many do not understand is that relationships, even with RW can and do form under quite 'normal' circumstances without the aid of third parties or artificial means.  The number of such unions are not minuscule, nor rare and my overall impression is that over time they may fare better.  Their long term presence on these boards support my theories.  I visited my first board, RWG 8 years or so ago simply searching for immigration information.

BC, you make an interesting and debatable point. I have no intention of debating it here because a part of me falls both sides of the thought line on that one. To clarify my position which is apparently a prerequisite for the visually challenged, I never went searching for a wife in the first instance. I went touring, did so 2 or 3 times per year for a few years, even worked in one country for a while, not that it was worth much in the bigger scheme of things. Mrs found me, I didn't find her, I wasn't that smart. Ironically, it was my now wife who introduced me to forums, after we spent time together.

[fabiodriven]

Please,  fabio,  do yourself a favour - find a thick skin.  This is not a journey for the faint hearted!

Why are you prodding me? Did you notice how long it's been since I posted. This isn't even my thread anymore.

[BC]

Why are you prodding me? Did you notice how long it's been since I posted. This isn't even my thread anymore.

Now that's a hoot..

[Kuna]

Why are you prodding me? Did you notice how long it's been since I posted. This isn't even my thread anymore.

...  But I'm glad you came back and are still reading though.

Let us know which cities you're interested in and hopefully we'll have plenty of guys with "on the ground" experience to help you out (other than palm you off to guide who'll scam you too).

Good luck!

[Vaughn]

With that said, the Russian consulate caused me some problems in the US, insisting that I have to apply in Houston as opposed to Washington which I had already received 3 prior visas.

I always applied directly to the Consulate in D.C. Secured the invitation myself, filled out the forms, etc...  To be honest, I found it
to be quite a chore. Still, in itself, it was hardly a valid reason to dismiss Russia as a destination. This time, though, I used gotorussia,
and it was very painless - and cost roughly the same as if I'd put the pieces together without assistance.

My visa just arrived - from San Francisco. I live in NC - go figure...

[Daveman]

Now that's a hoot..

Yeah it is, and the thread itself had turned kinda "hooty"

Relax everyone.. we've now learned the "new" guys are retards, and I/O (and other veteran married members) are "jerks" who get up on the wrong side of the bed (the side relegated to them by their Russian Wives, probably).

This pursuit isn't a dreamland fantasy come true.  Most new "retards" have their heads stuck so far up a fantasy's butt that reality rarely comes into play.  Most of the "jerks" have seen this so many times (usually followed by bad results) that the dose of "reality" they send is greeted with cries of "negativity".

Sure, we could all post more "politely"..  and if you go and read past posting histories you will generally find (with a few notable exceptions),  that the 'negativity' generally follows those who are caught up in a dream with little clue to reality.  Reality *is* often the negative aspect of dreamland. 

Granted, each has his/her own way.  That's life. 

If Fabio is so easily offended and put off by what has been written in this thread (rather mild actually), he'll not survive his first real argument with a Russian Woman.  "Rudeness" really doesn't exist in one of these relationships.