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Author Topic: hotel refunds  (Read 15449 times)

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Offline tfcrew

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #75 on: August 18, 2010, 06:15:21 PM »
I was wondering..why the refusal to send money Western Union?

One thing with  visiting and dealings over in Eastern Europe...anywhere for that matter- Don't get cheap on this ..it can cost too much.

As for this woman...she has two kids?

Does someone need an instant family this badly?

Best to scratch this and try again with greater fortitude.

And good luck there....
Karl

Facts do not cease to exist just because they are ignored.  -Aldous Huxley

Offline ML

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #76 on: August 18, 2010, 07:57:25 PM »
I only read the first page of responses, so this has probably been said.

1. One day of rental has always held apts for me, and that's over 20 apts in various FSU cities . . . business trips.

2. There aren't usually any receipts as we are used to in USA.  I always type up and print out a basic form before I leave USA.  Leave a few blanks here and there which are filled in when I hand over the money.  The FSU people usually think this is very strange, but they all go along with it; because it gets them their money..
Often, when a friend or associate is with me, I have them write out the same basic info in the local language.

3. I  doubt this woman was thinking scam from day 1.  But, when the opportunity arose she or someone she knows said:  "Hey, look.  Let's tell him you already paid and these generous AM always come through with a helping hand."

4. Since the rental was in a distant city, there is virtually no way she could have pulled it off from a distance . . . actually getting the money there.

5. She wouldn't have this much money to begin with.
Winston Churchill.  The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

Offline kievstar

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #77 on: August 18, 2010, 09:03:25 PM »
Boethius the problem I have with you quoting your husband is that you and hubby live in Alberta Calgary.  When is the last time he lived 4 months straight in Ukraine with you? 

western union is fine. 

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #78 on: August 19, 2010, 07:34:06 AM »
Hello again everyone.
I came here to ask a simple question.  I am a novice in the FSU dating/relationship arena.  This is why I posted my question in the "just starting out" category. Maybe, over time, I will gain the experience some of you have so I can attain the "expert" status some of you posters have achieved.  I can now see I did not provide "enough" information in my question.  Let me add more info...

1) I met this lady at ukrainedate.com

2) I offered to send this lady money so she could purchase a web cam.  she refused saying it would be silly because web cams in Ukraine cost $100.  I don't care if it cost $5 or $100, I would rather pay this little amount of money upfront rather than pay for a flight and hotel and treat someone to an all expense paid week of meals and gifts only to discover she is a "pro dater".

3) I live south of Nashville, TN.  I would have flown from Atlanta to Jfk to Kiev.  2 years ago I flew from Atlanta to Vienna to Dnepropetrovsk.  Evidently, Delta no longer flies to Dnepropetrovsk hence we were to meet in Kiev ( her choice ). 

Online Faux Pas

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #79 on: August 19, 2010, 07:39:27 AM »
Hello again everyone.
I came here to ask a simple question.  I am a novice in the FSU dating/relationship arena.  This is why I posted my question in the "just starting out" category. Maybe, over time, I will gain the experience some of you have so I can attain the "expert" status some of you posters have achieved.  I can now see I did not provide "enough" information in my question.  Let me add more info...

1) I met this lady at ukrainedate.com

2) I offered to send this lady money so she could purchase a web cam.  she refused saying it would be silly because web cams in Ukraine cost $100.  I don't care if it cost $5 or $100, I would rather pay this little amount of money upfront rather than pay for a flight and hotel and treat someone to an all expense paid week of meals and gifts only to discover she is a "pro dater".

3) I live south of Nashville, TN.  I would have flown from Atlanta to Jfk to Kiev.  2 years ago I flew from Atlanta to Vienna to Dnepropetrovsk.  Evidently, Delta no longer flies to Dnepropetrovsk hence we were to meet in Kiev ( her choice ). 


10bdub
With your prior experience one might think you would have secured some lodgings and bought your plane ticket in advance. Is there any particular why you wouldn't other than you do everything last minute or didn't really plan on going?

On your first trip, did you make any arrangements in advance?

FWIW, I think the old gal is trying to fleece you but, it seems she may have some degree of legitimacy for doing so.

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #80 on: August 19, 2010, 07:45:38 AM »
4) My sinus/allergy problem in a continuing battle.  I consider my one and only trip to Ukraine 2 years ago the most exciting event of my life.  Going to a foreign country ( for the first time ) not understanding the language, and relying and trusting my well being on "locals" was a life changing and learning experience.  I opened myself up to a world I new nothing about.  I would recommend to everyone who can afford to travel to ANY foreign country to do this.  For me, going alone was special.

5) Our conversation was always pleasant.  I don't care to share all the details of 6 months of communication but it was always pleasant.  Pleasant does not mean I was 100% honest with her or she was 100% honest with me.  Who can know for sure?


Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #81 on: August 19, 2010, 07:57:25 AM »
I feel I should apologize for a misspelled word in 4) above.  new=knew.

I post this additional info to please some of you here.  I did not write looking for support or bashing.  Only a question.

Should i post here in the future, I will make sure not to ask a second question in the same thread.  I suppose I should read, understand, and agree to all posting requirements.  I apologize the second question ( teaching in ukraine ) was too much for some to handle.  I simply thought this board exists for questions and answers.

To those of you with class I thank you.  For those of you without, maybe your children and grandchildren will develop it through their friends or society at large.

Offline CanadaMan

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #82 on: August 19, 2010, 08:59:45 AM »

...Should i post here in the future, I will make sure not to ask a second question in the same thread.  I suppose I should read, understand, and agree to all posting requirements.  I apologize the second question ( teaching in ukraine ) was too much for some to handle.  I simply thought this board exists for questions and answers.

To those of you with class I thank you.  For those of you without, maybe your children and grandchildren will develop it through their friends or society at large.

And so this officially ends the 'hotel refunds' post.
...or maybe not?

« Last Edit: August 19, 2010, 02:43:31 PM by CanadaMan »

Online Faux Pas

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #83 on: August 19, 2010, 09:12:07 AM »
I feel I should apologize for a misspelled word in 4) above.  new=knew.

I post this additional info to please some of you here.  I did not write looking for support or bashing.  Only a question.

Should i post here in the future, I will make sure not to ask a second question in the same thread.  I suppose I should read, understand, and agree to all posting requirements.  I apologize the second question ( teaching in ukraine ) was too much for some to handle.  I simply thought this board exists for questions and answers.

To those of you with class I thank you.  For those of you without, maybe your children and grandchildren will develop it through their friends or society at large.

You know maybe the next time you wish to ask a question perhaps you could just give us all some advance notice. That way, after you ask the question we could all just line up and give you nods of agreement to everything you say.
 :cluebat:

Offline Sculpto

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #84 on: August 19, 2010, 09:41:23 AM »
So.. at risk of kicking a dead horse...

As far as I can tell.. we still do not know if the OP had an advance ticket purchased.. either way.. that is not conclusive.. maybe he has miles and would have been flying first class at the last minute.. or maybe the exact opposite..

however...

If the lady took time off work.. made arrangements with a relative or friend to care for her children.. went out and bought a new dress.. maybe had her hair and nails done.. had lots of hopes about his arrival.. she may have taken his cancellation VERY hard.  In such a scenario.. is she a scammer?  Should she be reimbursed?  Would a gentleman simply ask if she had incurred any expenses and go out of his way to cover those expenses?  Also.. her story of not being able to reschedule is believable.. she had a job.. she may have had to jump through hoops to get time off.. maybe even bribing someone to cover for her or trade vacation slots or paying off an uncooperative boss.  Plenty of reasons for her to be very angry IF she was for real.

On the other hand..

ukrainedate.com has no system of verification available.  The fact that there was only one cam chat in all those months which supposedly came via an internet cafe is HIGHLY suspicious to me.. reason.. I understand I was in Russia and not Ukraine.. but.. I was in at least 9 different, LARGE internet cafes in St P.. usually 30 but up to 100 computers.. I did not see even one system with Skype loaded nor with a webcam.  Maybe its different in Ukraine.. but.. even remembering back to my Odessa trip and the two i-net cafes I used there.. and the one in Kherson.. again.. no skype.. no web cams.. I also find it odd that someone could afford a computer and i-net connection but would claim to not afford a webcam.. even if it cost $100.  There are TONS of women on social networks with webcams connected to laptops they over paid for connected to over priced high speed connections that they somehow manage to pay for.  (they don't eat, thus maintaining their slim figures)

In my paranoid way of thinking.. the OP dodged a bullet.. there are a number of very nasty scenarios that could have taken place had he actually arrived in Kiev. 

Offline ECOCKS

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #85 on: August 19, 2010, 11:10:28 AM »
Hang in there 10b, if you let some of the jerks here get to you too much you'll never survive in the FSUW long-term.

Hey Eric! Can you send me that picture of Sarah from your avatar? I have a shrine here in the foyer of my home where we say a little prayer for the country as we come and go everyday, it would be useful to place in the center of the shelf.
Pick and choose carefully among the advice offered and consider the source carefully. PM, Skype or email if you care to chat or discuss

Offline groovlstk

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #86 on: August 19, 2010, 11:15:55 AM »
To those of you with class I thank you.  For those of you without, maybe your children and grandchildren will develop it through their friends or society at large.

I take it those with "class" are those who told you what you wanted to hear - i.e., keep your $597 and tell her to flake off?

 :ROFL:


Offline Voyager36

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #87 on: August 19, 2010, 11:16:38 AM »
So.. at risk of kicking a dead horse...

however...

If the lady took time off work.. made arrangements with a relative or friend to care for her children.. went out and bought a new dress.. maybe had her hair and nails done.. had lots of hopes about his arrival.. she may have taken his cancellation VERY hard.  In such a scenario.. is she a scammer?  Should she be reimbursed?  Would a gentleman simply ask if she had incurred any expenses and go out of his way to cover those expenses?  Also.. her story of not being able to reschedule is believable.. she had a job.. she may have had to jump through hoops to get time off.. maybe even bribing someone to cover for her or trade vacation slots or paying off an uncooperative boss.  Plenty of reasons for her to be very angry IF she was for real.
no web cams.. I also find it odd that someone could afford a computer and i-net connection but would claim to not afford a webcam.. even if it cost $100.  There are TONS of women on social networks with webcams connected to laptops they over paid for connected to over priced high speed connections that they somehow manage to pay for.  (they don't eat, thus maintaining their slim figures)
 
I was thinking along the lines of that part.
It seems like she was arranging for the accomodation, she likely has some friend or relative book the apartment, probably with a deposit of a night's rental. (maybe 500 or 600 griven) She would have had to buy tickets to Kiev, and take time off from work. I know from experience, rail tickets are sometimes difficult to get in high summer, so she would buy those in advance. Accomodation is also more expensive in Kiev. She's also already booked time off work, and at this late date probably cannot get a tourist package somewhere else, so in all likelyhood has had her vacation ruined or at least disrupted.

If it were me I would probably send at least $250 or $300 as compensation for bailing out at the last minute.

It's possible that she was not totally on the up & up, but I would be horrified to think that I would be screwing someone over like that, especially after 6 months of communication.

On one hand - If she really was a scammer (doubtful, after 6 months), I would be losing about a day's pay. If she is telling the truth and has lost money for accomodation, train fare, disrupted holiday etc, she could be screwed for a month or two's wages. Are we really so callous as men  that we act like this?
« Last Edit: August 19, 2010, 11:21:42 AM by Voyager36 »

Offline OlgaH

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #88 on: August 19, 2010, 11:37:40 AM »


On one hand - If she really was a scammer (doubtful, after 6 months)...

Here is a situation that took place in our county.

A woman with a decent job, she is a teacher, paying for her goods put her wallet above other wallet left on the counter by a previous customer, after she simply grabbed two wallets. She was very surprised when police arrived right to her house. She forgot about the store's camera.

Most likely she was not planning it when she went shopping...  but she decided not to miss such opportunity.  

Offline Sculpto

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #89 on: August 19, 2010, 12:48:28 PM »
Perhaps the OP should ask someone like Anastasia Ash to intervene with a translated phone call.. or some other well seasoned interpretor with a perfect reputation..

Maybe there is a chance to get to the bottom of it all?

If, in the unlikely case she is real and did incur losses.. she would therefore be entitled to some kind of compensation.

Offline OlgaH

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #90 on: August 19, 2010, 01:06:10 PM »
Sculpto, it is more likely a question "Who's being naive?"

Western men who is thinking that a FSU woman with two children easily gets "a monthly salary or sometimes two monthly salaries" out of her pocket to pay for someone she never met? or FSU women who do such things?  :D

Offline Sculpto

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #91 on: August 19, 2010, 01:11:17 PM »
Sculpto, it is more likely a question "Who's being naive?"

Western men who is thinking that a FSU woman with two children easily gets "a monthly salary or sometimes two monthly salaries" out of her pocket to pay for someone she never met? or FSU women who do such things?  :D

I agree 100% Olga.. the only reason I suggest it is if it was me.. I would want my conscience to be 100% clear.

Offline OlgaH

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #92 on: August 19, 2010, 01:29:47 PM »
Sculpto, the first mistake is to think that women are very naive lambs, especially women with children.  ;)

Offline tim 360

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #93 on: August 19, 2010, 01:46:21 PM »
Sculpto, the first mistake is to think that women are very naive lambs, especially women with children.  ;)

So true. So true. So True.  Some of the truest words in this thread. :ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping:
"Never argue with a fool,  onlookers may not be able to tell the difference".  Mark Twain

Offline Voyager36

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #94 on: August 19, 2010, 01:54:29 PM »

Sculpto, it is more likely a question "Who's being naive?"

Western men who is thinking that a FSU woman with two children easily gets "a monthly salary or sometimes two monthly salaries" out of her pocket to pay for someone she never met? or FSU women who do such things?  :D

Olga, unless they were planning to sleep on a park bench, she must have made some arrangements for an apartment, as clearly the guy didn't. She would probably have had someone book the place, and probably had to pay for one night at least. Mrs. V was in Kiev last summer, and it was very difficult to find a place to stay as the hotels were mostly booked up.
Not to mention the lady had the hassle of having her vacation cancelled at the last minute.
Did she exaggerate the costs? - very likely
Is she out-of pocket for some expenses? Very likely.
Therefore I  would still send a couple hundred bucks as compensation for pulling the plug at the last minute.

I agree 100% Olga.. the only reason I suggest it is if it was me.. I would want my conscience to be 100% clear.

That was my thought too...

Offline Sculpto

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #95 on: August 19, 2010, 02:00:48 PM »
Sculpto, the first mistake is to think that women are very naive lambs, especially women with children.  ;)

I don't disagree Olga.. but.. Russians are in general the first to suspect other Russians of wrong doing.. am I right or not?  :)

Offline OlgaH

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #96 on: August 19, 2010, 02:18:22 PM »

Did she exaggerate the costs? - very likely


as everything else - very likely  ;) How much the OP knows about her after 6 months of skyping? I see not too much

"I have always been curious as to when she could sleep, work or take care of her 2 children and talk with me at such different times of the day and night."

She was told not to pay. Normally, a woman would discuss cost and method of payment with a man in advance especially if she would be asked by a man to arrange the place of meeting, and if she would be asked to pay in advance by an owner of apartment   she would contact the OP first because $579 is not so small sum of money.  Normally, a woman who has financial troubles to buy a simple web camera and spend some money for video chat in the internet cafe will not spend even $50 (that could be 1/4 of her salary) on a person she never met. Having two children a woman will not deal with a "dark horses" in the market who would threaten her with payments. A honest woman who honestly paid would not refuse to give information on who she paid to to help to resolve the problem.

Offline SMS60

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #97 on: August 19, 2010, 02:27:49 PM »
I don't know if this is relevent but it was taken from the RWD Glossary.


 :noidea:


Keyboard Romeo: a Western man who is content with corresponding/chatting with one or more FSUW for months and even years on end, not giving much consideration to the fact that actually jumping on a plane and visiting them could be much more constructive for both.

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #98 on: August 19, 2010, 02:31:29 PM »
For those of you without, maybe your children and grandchildren will develop it through their friends or society at large.

What croc of pshyth!! Coming from a guy absent of any sense of decency for leading someone on, have the audacity to leave her hanging, then if that wasn't enough, label her as a scammer...

Phew, you're a joke!...
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2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
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Offline OlgaH

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #99 on: August 19, 2010, 02:33:25 PM »
I don't disagree Olga.. but.. Russians are in general the first to suspect other Russians of wrong doing.. am I right or not?  :)

Sculpto, I doubt any reasonable Western men would pay $500 for something he never have chance to see and without any guaranties. The same in Russia. When people rent an apartment in Russia they usually check the apartment first at least to know what they pay for. Reasonable people in Russia renting an apartment usually have a civil contract with the apartment's owner and I also have never had a problem asking for a notice of receipt from an owner of apartment (exact sum of money and renting period, and owners passport number and signature) and I have never been refused of such notice.

 

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