Do most Russian/Ukrainian women expect to be home wifes?

[Viking456]

If I married a woman from Russia or Ukraine, I'd like her to learn the language and get a job as soon as possible, because the economy is much better if two are working.

Would that be a great problem for most of the girls you think? How big percentage of the women do you think expects to be home wives and don't want to work?

[Ade]

If I married a woman from Russia or Ukraine, I'd like her to learn the language and get a job as soon as possible, because the economy is much better if two are working.

Would that be a great problem for most of the girls you think? How big percentage of the women do you think expects to be home wives and don't want to work?

You'll find what you look for.

If you search for a 20 year old princess, she'll expect to be treated as such and not want to work.

On the other hand, if you look for an average Russian or Ukrainian woman, they will have their own career aspirations and want to work. However, you may find that they will not be able to work in their chosen careers immediately without recertification and extra diplomas. Are you prepared to help them get that? Or do you expect them to go out and do menial jobs such as cleaning offices to help pay the bills?

[Avis]

There are only few russian/ukranian women here, and it is not enough to answer your question - every girl has got her own priorities in life, the easiest way to know is to ask the one you're interested in

[Mila]

Hi. It depends whom you marry. If you are lucky and marry the right lady, then of course, she will want to work, as it is too boring to sit at home and be limited in communication and self developing. All the ladies I met and I know want to work, as they want to remain educated and interesting for the man, to my mind, it is not only about money, it is more of a personal development. 

[bhayes30]

Hi. It depends whom you marry. If you are lucky and marry the right lady, then of course, she will want to work, as it is too boring to sit at home and be limited in communication and self developing. All the ladies I met and I know want to work, as they want to remain educated and interesting for the man, to my mind, it is not only about money, it is more of a personal development.

good comments mila. i'm 29 myself. and i hope i can build my career in 10 years and be successful enough to be able to support a woman into a positive situation so that she can develop herself like you say.

[Misha]

good comments mila. i'm 29 myself. and i hope i can build my career in 10 years and be successful enough to be able to support a woman into a positive situation so that she can develop herself like you say.

All things being equal, I would recommend that you try to date locally first 

[Viking456]

You'll find what you look for.

If you search for a 20 year old princess, she'll expect to be treated as such and not want to work.

On the other hand, if you look for an average Russian or Ukrainian woman, they will have their own career aspirations and want to work. However, you may find that they will not be able to work in their chosen careers immediately without recertification and extra diplomas. Are you prepared to help them get that? Or do you expect them to go out and do menial jobs such as cleaning offices to help pay the bills?

If she had a realistic chance of getting recertification e.t.c. and a job in her field here, then I would of course help her with that. She could live on my salary for a couple of years, that's no problem.

But if she previously had an occupation that she couldn't get a job as here in Sweden, then I'd like her to take any job (like cleaning offfices) or reeducate herself to something that make her employable within a few years.

[Viking456]

Hi. It depends whom you marry. If you are lucky and marry the right lady, then of course, she will want to work, as it is too boring to sit at home and be limited in communication and self developing. All the ladies I met and I know want to work, as they want to remain educated and interesting for the man, to my mind, it is not only about money, it is more of a personal development.

Sounds good.. That suggests that at least 50% of the women wants to work. I.e. getting an Ukrainian woman would not necessarily mean that we'd have to live on one wage forever.

[Misha]

Are you prepared to help them get that? Or do you expect them to go out and do menial jobs such as cleaning offices to help pay the bills?

We have friends, immigrants from the FSU. She is now jumping through all the hoops to be certified as a nurse in Canada, and she is now working cleaning businesses in the evening. Sure, it would not be her first choice, but given that it pays $20/hour she is not complaining too much as it pays more than many entry office jobs. She sees it as a decent option as it allows her to work and take the required courses to eventually become a nurse.

[Misha]

Sounds good.. That suggests that at least 50% of the women wants to work. I.e. getting an Ukrainian woman would not necessarily mean that we'd have to live on one wage forever.

Personally, I would say that it is closer to 100% than 50% as I do not know of any women who would want to stay at home permanently and not work unless they had small children.

[Viking456]

Personally, I would say that it is closer to 100% than 50% as I do not know of any women who would want to stay at home permanently and not work unless they had small children.

Sounds great 

Guess it will take a minimum of 1-2 years to get a job if they need to learn a new language.

[Daveman]

Imagine a scenario where you transplant to a non-english speaking/writing country.  Most of us in the USA had a little French or Spanish in high school or college.  So perhaps pick one of those.  Now imagine, even with your prior study, that you want to pursue a career in your field yet suddenly your degree is virtually meaningless in your new environs and you must go back to school, but you must now study in, let's say, Spanish to complete your updated degree.


How long, realistically speaking, do you think it would take to complete your education not only "of" and "in" a second language but using that second language to do it?


That's "her" situation when she arrives...  even with those who have the ability to communicate well with you in English will be seriously challenged.  Of course she can do it, but it does take time (and, of course, her effort and dedication to the cause).

[Misha]

Sounds great 

Guess it will take a minimum of 1-2 years to get a job if they need to learn a new language.

I know one young couple, they met when he was teaching English in Russia, she got a job pretty much when she arrived in Canada. However, it was not in her profession. She studied English and is now in college. Finding a job is the easy part, establishing a new career will likely likely take closer to a decade IMHO. Some luck out and get jobs immediately or close to it in their chosen careers, but those are exceptions IMHO.

[Nat]

Sounds good.. That suggests that at least 50% of the women wants to work. I.e. getting an Ukrainian woman would not necessarily mean that we'd have to live on one wage forever.

It sounds as if you're choosing a new car or a dog, really.
Why do you want to marry a woman from Russian or Ukraine? Do you think it's easier than marry a local girl or that they demand less?

[Ade]

We have friends, immigrants from the FSU. She is now jumping through all the hoops to be certified as a nurse in Canada, and she is now working cleaning businesses in the evening. Sure, it would not be her first choice, but given that it pays $20/hour she is not complaining too much as it pays more than many entry office jobs. She sees it as a decent option as it allows her to work and take the required courses to eventually become a nurse.

But did she feel pressured into choosing that option because her husband expected her to clean offices to pay the bills?

[Misha]

But did she feel pressured into choosing that option because her husband expected her to clean offices to pay the bills?

Her husband is also an immigrant from the FSU (and was an immigrant from Africa to the Soviet Union). She was pressured to find a job in the sense that we are all pressured to find a job to pay the bills. They are a family in the real sense of the term: both do their part to ensure that they and their children will have the best future possible 

[Gator]

But if she previously had an occupation that she couldn't get a job as here in Sweden, then I'd like her to take any job (like cleaning offfices) or reeducate herself to something that make her employable within a few years.

Reeducating your wife.  Very noble.  This happens with many RW wives.
 
Cleaning offices?  You have an interesting brain to be noble on one hand and then state this.  Why not get her a job working as a nude dancer? The latter would surely pay more. 
 
There is another option. I don't see any reason for young people to marry other than to have children.  So why not a child?  If you do not know her well enough to want a child with her, why marry?  If you can not afford a child, I agree with Misha that you should date locally for now. 
 
Part of the motivation for marrying a foreign man is the opportunity for a "better" life.  Cleaning offices would be okay if your RW were presently employed as an apartment building custodian (those who sweep the stair well, pick up garbage, etc.).   
 

[Gator]

Her husband is also an immigrant from the FSU (and was an immigrant from Africa to the Soviet Union). She was pressured to find a job in the sense that we are all pressured to find a job to pay the bills. They are a family in the real sense of the term: both do their part to ensure that they and their children will have the best future possible 

It sounds as if your friends are in a unique situation.  I doubt that this was the plan when marrying, but someting that became necessary after marriage.
 
I have never met one RW who would consider cleaning offices.  Most RW were educated and employed in professional careers where they dressed up to go to work.  Life in Russia and Ukraine is not that bad!  Plus the RW I met had a lot of pride.  Maybe they were short on cash, yet they were long on pride. 

[Misha]

I have never met one RW who would consider cleaning offices.

I am sure it was not her first choice, but at $20 per hour, she earns more than many of my wife's relatives in Germany who are electricians and she grosses over 100,000 roubles per month which would be considered a very decent salary in Moscow let alone Belarus    She set aside pride for a better salary. Of course, once she is certified to work as a nurse, she will forego cleaning for her profession  Nonetheless, IMVHO she is more typical of the average RW than any you will find on an MOB site.

[Daveman]

It sounds as if your friends are in a unique situation.  I doubt that this was the plan when marrying, but someting that became necessary after marriage.
 
I have never met one RW who would consider cleaning offices.  Most RW were educated and employed in professional careers where they dressed up to go to work.  Life in Russia and Ukraine is not that bad!  Plus the RW I met had a lot of pride.  Maybe they were short on cash, yet they were long on pride.

I am sure it was not her first choice, but at $20 per hour, she earns more than many of my wife's relatives in Germany who are electricians and she grosses over 100,000 roubles per month which would be considered a very decent salary in Moscow let alone Belarus    She set aside pride for a better salary. Of course, once she is certified to work as a nurse, she will forego cleaning for her profession  Nonetheless, IMVHO she is more typical of the average RW than any you will find on an MOB site.

I'd have to agree with that statement.  There are a couple of ways of looking at it.. one common way is that it takes a certain personality type to consider seeking a marriage partner abroad.  The other is that those who do are the most likely candidates to have the "entitlement" attitude, who are absorbed with appearances, status, etc etc...


However one chooses to see the glass -- the FSUW who are on the international dating sites, and especially (raised exponentially) so the ones SOLELY on international dating sites,  are of a different mindset than your typical Russian "family gal". 


Of course, that's just an opinion from my own observations and I am sure the age of the individual woman also plays a determining role in the "Princess Factor"...  but overall, yeah, there is a difference and sometimes a vast one.

[Terran]

Every career has different requirements. For example my cousin married a man from the usa. In Ukraine she was a family doctor. Her english is really good and i believe she studied 1 or 2 extra courses when she arrived and then challenged the medical exam. Now she works in a doctors office.

I think it really depends on what career and the requirements are. Some people will find it harder to obtain their careers once they relocate, but you have to decide if you are willing to see it throught to the end. If you are not willing to help your future partner achieve his or her goals then you should look maybe locally.

I know many Ukrainians (family included) that are always studying to help improve their knowledge and better themselves. Ukrainian girls are not afraid of hard work from what i am seen.

[Ade]

I am sure it was not her first choice, but at $20 per hour, she earns more than many of my wife's relatives in Germany who are electricians and she grosses over 100,000 roubles per month which would be considered a very decent salary in Moscow let alone Belarus    She set aside pride for a better salary. Of course, once she is certified to work as a nurse, she will forego cleaning for her profession  Nonetheless, IMVHO she is more typical of the average RW than any you will find on an MOB site.

I'm sure you understand the difference here between a woman making her own choices based on circumstance, and a woman being expected by her husband to work wherever doing whatever to help pay the bills?

[Gator]

  Nonetheless, IMVHO she is more typical of the average RW than ANY you will find on an MOB site.

The term "any and all" is silly.  It suggests that you have no experience with corresponding with sincere RW who listed themselves with reputable agencies. 
 
Are you suggesting that I should have gone to mamba and written RW that I could get them a job cleaning offices?   
 
I will agree that virtually all RW are not shy about rolling up their sleeves and doing what is necessary to handle the cards that life has dealt them.  In fact, now that you mentioned it, I knew one attractive RW divorced from her AM who was cleaning homes of  her new boyfriend's family. Please note that she desperately wanted out of that situation.   
 
My point is that very few RW would leave the FSU knowing they would be cleaning offices until they reeducated themselves.  Cleaning offices in the day, going to classes at night..............Where is Aloe?   I will admit that I never asked the question.  I would feel bad if my wife were compelled to clean offices.  In fact,  I would never marry.
 
 

[Misha]

Gator, you are right, I should have used most I instead of all. Mea culpa. As for RW and whether they would immigrate if they knew they had to clean offices temporarily, I wager many if not most would. I know few RW in Russia who did not take on a less than prestigious job if necessary for the sake of their family.

[tfcrew]

All things being equal, I would recommend that you try to date locally first 

Even local dating can get tricky...

Frisco widow feels stung after signing $13,400 contract with matchmaking service

http://www.dallasnews.com/investigations/problem-solver/20111201-frisco-widow-feels-stung-after-signing-13400-contract-with-matchmaking-service.ece?action=reregister