Divorced RW experience of dating in the US.

[Vasilisa]

I think people just wanted to see you succeed and be happy.

They wanted it so badly that they started being offensive?!
Oh, yes, I've heard that expression: the road to hell is paved with noble intentions.

[LiveFromUkraine]

They wanted it so badly that they started being offensive?!
Oh, yes, I've heard that expression: the road to hell is paved with noble intentions.

[LiveFromUkraine]

Plz tell me, i am very curious My theory is he stayed with her for 4 years without knowing if she wanted more children cuz he was just taking it as it comes to him. and when he arrived at the thought that he wanted children, then he asked her. But i am very curious what you think. What is men's mentality?

I think guys just get complacent.  They get into a routine that is easy and don't want to detour from it.  The path of least resistance and maybe a beer seems to keep a lot of guys happy. 

It is one of the reasons I like to travel and get myself out of my comfort zone.  It is too easy to get into boring daily routines.

[Muzh]

I only remember one time in my 4 years on the forum when somebody managed to upset me (very recently), so i'd say i most likely will not blush or get offended

Ok, I'll be nice.
 
The vast majority of guys who are in this type of relationship are being properly "serviced" by the woman and the notion of marriage is, literally, miles away. Some will deny it, while others will boast about it. I've seen quite a few and I hate to admit that in my younger days I was one of them too. BUT, at least I would tell them up front that there was to be no commitment.
 
This is when they would say, "Ha, I'll change him."
 
And then I matured.
 
It was funny because when I became serious, the women didn't want to. Don't get me wrong, I still dated like there was no tomorrow but, the moment I mentioned or even hinted a commitment, she would literally disappear. I didn't think much of it because I was young and there were a TON OF THIN BEAUTIFUL AMERICAN WOMEN AVAILABE to me. (Hear that Ed?) What happened was a lack of coordination. Those I felt serious about didn't wanted to and those I was NOT serious about were always hinting, like "Wanna go to a wedding of my long lost cousin?"
 
Think about this, when I was in my mid-thirties I gave up hope of getting in an exclusive relationship that I actually told a friend I had no choice but to sacrifice myself and service all those willing unattachable women out there. It was a tough job but someone had to do it.
 
I remember once my mother (GRHS) came to visit me and she stayed in my slaughterhouse apartment. One day I came home from work and told me she was cleaning around. Then she came with this wad of papers and asked me what I was planning to do with them. Being oblivious I asked her what were they and she gave me this look and put them on the dining table. Phone numbers. My problem was that I would forget to write their names or it was so dark (Ha! Drunk as a skunk) I just garbled their names. So, to the garbage. (I have witnesses and can provide affidavits on request)
 
Is that good enough of an explanation? 

[Muzh]

They wanted it so badly that they started being offensive?!
Oh, yes, I've heard that expression: the road to hell is paved with noble intentions.

My goodness woman, you really have a very fragile ego. Apart from one guy who said "Russian Go Home" I haven't seen anyone here being offensive to you at all.
 
Boy.
 
Relax.

[SANDRO43]

if he fails the WWII, geographical and space  test

Vasilisa, here's a tough WWII test question for your next date :

"What Allied Navy first captured an Enigma cipher machine installed on a Nazi U-boat?"


Boarding party approaching U-boat

[Vasilisa]

Vasilisa, here's a tough WWII test question for your next date :

"What Allied Navy first captured an Enigma cipher machine installed on a Nazi U-boat?"


Boarding party approaching U-boat

I am trying to imagine the guy's eyes.

[vwrw]

I came here mainly to show the men dating  RW in the US their vision of average AM so this thread would be more informative....

The thread is closed, I am not going to post any more"date reports" so you'd better find another informator.

It would be unfortunate if you ceased reporting about your dates. Although I disagree that your vision of an average AM is representative  of other RW's vision who are dating here, I still find it interesting to learn about your experience.

[Vasilisa]

It would be unfortunate if you ceased reporting about your dates. Although I disagree that your vision of an average AM is representative  of other RW's vision who are dating here, I still find it interesting to learn about your experience.

I don't mind that, the thread was open for every other divorced woman in the US to post.

[Vasilisa]

My goodness woman, you really have a very fragile ego. Apart from one guy who said "Russian Go Home" I haven't seen anyone here being offensive to you at all.
 
Boy.
 
Relax.

RELAX?! ME?!
Excuse me, people here  made  fun  of my desire to present flowers to the veterans when  the easy-going drama free guy didn't have a clue what to present the flowers for and for my compliment to the lady dressed like Jacqueline Kennedy, and that made me a drama queen with high expectations  covering too serious topics on the first date and extremely serious approach testing men.

Also you put me into psycho's category because I was deeply touched by a tragical life story.

 
Then you told me to be smart like I am not.

Thanks,  but no, thanks.
Let's discuss vodka types and 6 flags.

[Ade]

Muzh, I am not looking for men, so I don't have any desire to understand men's psychology. I am not for everyone and I am not going to impress anyone pretending to be who and what I am not. I am being myself. I am looking for one and only whose psychology I'd love to be interested in and who will love me the way I am with all my ups and downs, tears and smiles.
Looking for a robot?! See the world black and white?! All cryng women are psychos , all smiling ones are nice ladies?! Thinking stereotypes?!  All Russians are commies, all Americans are bloody capitalists?! Move on! Check out!!! 

So you're only willing to be someone you're not when hubby has cheated on you?

Instead I'd ask myself what makes him spend time with her making all these presents to her and try to become this woman he wants to see and love.

If love is completely gone forever and he is in love with her there's nothing that can be done, no matter if you argue or not. The best scenario in this case is that he will support you and the children financially.

[Muzh]

Ade, lost cause.
 
One thing is for sure, she has a vivid imagination.
 
As I said before, if she doesn't control her imagination there will be a cheating husband.
 
Maybe then she cannot be herself. 

[Daveman]

They wanted it so badly that they started being offensive?!

Now this is incredibly interesting... What, exactly, did you take as being offensive?


And yes, I doubt that anyone here wishes you anything other than success and happiness.  People will give opinions, thoughts, make jokes with you, etc... 

I don't mind that, the thread was open for every other divorced woman in the US to post.

This and any thread, other than in that one sans response thread that Boethius mentioned, was and is open for every member to post.  That's how a discussion forum works.

[vwrw]

I do not know how many people here watched movie titled "the way we were". Here is its trailer.  http://www.amazon.com/The-Way-We-Were/dp/B000W453KQ


To my mind, the main female protagonist-Katie- reminds of  Vasilisa; whereas, the main male protagonist-Hubbell- well represents desires of an average AM in dating.

One of their problems was that " Katie is incensed by the cynical jokes Hubbell's friends make and is unable to understand his acceptance of their insensitivity and shallow dismissal of political engagement. At the same time, his serenity is disturbed by her lack of social graces and her polarizing postures." (Wikipidia)

 Vasilisa, if you have a chance, watch this movie. this is a good one.

[Vasilisa]

So you're only willing to be someone you're not when hubby has cheated on you?

Errr? did I say that?!

[Vasilisa]

Ade, lost cause.
 
One thing is for sure, she has a vivid imagination.
 
As I said before, if she doesn't control her imagination there will be a cheating husband.
 
Maybe then she cannot be herself. 

Now I really believe Muzh changed his phone number.

[Vasilisa]

Now this is incredibly interesting... What, exactly, did you take as being offensive?


And yes, I doubt that anyone here wishes you anything other than success and happiness.  People will give opinions, thoughts, make jokes with you, etc... 

This and any thread, other than in that one sans response thread that Boethius mentioned, was and is open for every member to post.  That's how a discussion forum works.

Well, when I am asking where I should date and what I should do I'd highly appreciate people's opinions, when people start making up some stories and funny dialogues making fun of me and tell me what to do when I am not asking for their advice  that's offensive.
I understand that you all wish me only good luck, but I repeated several times that I know what I am looking for, the advices I have go so are is quite enough, I am not asking for any other ones.


Why can't you just lock the thread as I asked. Or better remove it as it is of no value obviously as everyone knows it all better anyway and everything is a product of my imagination.

[Vasilisa]

If you wish me the best just do it.
I have no desire to be a source of entertainment for bored people. Neither I want my personal life to be a source of entertainment. I thought it was interesting to someone from an informative point of view, but it's of importance from the entertaining point of view so far.

[Daveman]

...
Why can't you just lock the thread as I asked. Or better remove it as it is of no value obviously as everyone knows it all better anyway and everything is a product of my imagination.

Vasilisa,


This is a discussion forum.  No rules have been broken.  There is no valid reason to close the thread, move the thread, or delete the thread.  Once a thread is posted, it cannot be unposted.  Sometimes we will remove a thread if there is the possibility of dire consequences to the poster if the thread remains.  This one does not qualify.


I'm sorry if you feel that some of the posts were offensive, especially so for mine as I certainly didn't mean them to either belittle you or to make you feel a negative rush of emotion. 


Even as thread starter, you do not get to choose how others either view or participate in the thread.  Some are here for information, others for entertainment, and a few only the Supreme Being could fathom why they are here... and this goes for the individual threads as well...  there is a combination of information and entertainment in virtually every thread.  Your posts *will* receive both praise and criticism whether you want it or like it. 


If you do not post further in the thread it will eventually fade into oblivion.  Since you wish to control how the thread is perceived, what people are allowed to post, etc, and you cannot... I would suggest that course -- to just allow the thread to fade away. 


That would be disappointing as your thread is a pretty decent combination of information and entertainment -- exactly what makes a thread stand out. 


Oh, and P.S. I wish you the best... 

[Anotherkiwi]

This thread's grown so fast that I still have several pages to read...but
 

Remembering how thick some of the accents were when I visited, I would have gladly hired someone to help translate.  The best I could do was to drink a few pints with them which seemed to work beautifully.  haha

A very good friend of mine is a "Geordie" (from Newcastle in north-east England), who moved here with his family more than 40 years ago.  It's pretty embarrassing after all this time when I have to ask him to repeat something because I don't have a clue what he said the first time! 

[Ade]

Errr? did I say that?!

Um, yes, you did.

[LiveFromUkraine]

 
A very good friend of mine is a "Geordie" (from Newcastle in north-east England), who moved here with his family more than 40 years ago.  It's pretty embarrassing after all this time when I have to ask him to repeat something because I don't have a clue what he said the first time! 

hah  I remember bringing a girlfriend over to Australia (I'm from the US) when I worked a contract and watched her try to understand some of my mates there.  It was priceless.  My one friend must have realized, from the blank look on her face, that she didn't understand.  He proceeded to pronunciate every letter (especially those r's)and that did it.  I just laughed and said I hope I don't sound like that. 

The Geordie accent was a killer for me as well.

[ghost of moon goddess]

Vasilisa! I am very confident that NONE of the posters on here would even dream of treating you without underlying respect, I'm so sorry that you seem to have hard feelings about some peaceful "fireworks" illuminated this great thread.
You have been a unique «reporter», with some sort of  date experiences under your belt!!!
I hope that ''lock the thread'' is not code for "I am likely to never get back to post on RWD»?
I will miss you. And the feeling of missing you will no doubt be echoed by many other  RWD members.
 

[Vasilisa]

Um, yes, you did.

All rightie then, as you say, that's exactly what I am looking for: I am looking for the hubby to pretend to be who I am not when he cheats on me. 
That was the major point of the thread, that's unbelieveble how understanding people in Norway can be, they can read your thoughts when you are across the ocean.

[Muzh]

Vasilisa! I am very confident that NONE of the posters on here would even dream of treating you without underlying respect, I'm so sorry that you seem to have hard feelings about some peaceful "fireworks" illuminated this great thread.
You have been a unique «reporter», with some sort of  date experiences under your belt!!!
I hope that ''lock the thread'' is not code for "I am likely to never get back to post on RWD»?
I will miss you. And the feeling of missing you will no doubt be echoed by many other  RWD members.
 

Count me in that group.