In Kharkov now, and feel like i am in the process of being scammed :(

[Eduard]

U407, please tell them who you are using in Harkov. This will prevent many others from getting hurt and taken for a ride.

[JohnDearGreen]

JohnDearGreen - Listen to your feeling.  My experience has been that no genuine, good and sincere RW, who are really into you, would want you to spend lots of money on her by taking her to expensive restaurants and buying her expensive things. On the contrary, she would be very protective of you and your money. She would know what her phone number is off the top of her head.... FWIW. Good luck to you. E.

The agency business model would not survive if the ladies refused all meetings that didn't sincerely interest them.  The better looking ladies probably spend 20 dates with men they have absolutely no interest in so that they might get the one date that really interests them.  Time is money and that is the price they must pay to utilize the agency's service. 

Would a good and sincere AM choose to meet 10 ladies who are all way out of his league?  If he wants to pay for it, that is fine.  That is the price he pays to utilize the agency's service.  But if he doesn't realize that these ladies are practically required to meet him whether they want to or not, that is his problem, not the agency's problem, not the lady's problem.  Let the buyer beware is the obvious rule here. 

If the agency pays the better looking ladies for the larger amount of their time they waste on dates with men they have no sincere interest in, I have no problem with that.  It keeps the good looking ladies in the agency.

[newjason]

Guys . . . Come on now.  Some of you are being overly  harsh on this fellow man.

Yes, he did some dumb things.  Some of you detailed out these dumb things in such a detailed manner that it is obvious that you fell into these same traps yourself.

We can give good advice without being so harsh.

LOL
I assume you are including myself in the too harsh category.
It's odd how other members view my comments as "girly" ) i forget the exact term but you get the point)

Yes, I can admit I was having the proverbial wool pulled over my eyes at one point also. However,  Like you ML I had been living with her here in the states for about a year before I was having me gold dug.
We were in love so I was already getting all the sex I could desire and it was not until she returned to the FSU did she flip and use me as a wallet. So, yes it is from experience that I am harsh to a man in his position, because  let's face it:
Now, he still has a chance to listen to reason and adjust his heads
If it were to progress, say for the whole trip and then he reports back that  he is totally in love and she is the greatest thing since sliced bread...bla bla bla ...
Do you honestly think anyone could get through to him at that time? No matter what approach was used?

On the other hand,  had I not had those experiences and lived through that joy, the love, the passion, the doubt, the anger, the betrayal, the hurt and loss. I would most likely be ignorant and not wiser and stronger and able to find happiness as i have grown and learned to know my limits and my boundaries and not compromise them just to get in the panties of a pretty young woman.

Spoiling women is bad. Bad for all of us, so It may seem harsh, but if guys can't take some slaps to the face now, and see that throwing money around is not a noble gesture. That it is in fact enabling this whole perceived scamming culture. So it needs to be understood and stopped so that some real human connection can begin to develop.

So, while you are right ML, 

I think padding the obvious is more damaging than just painting it with colors so it is more visible from up close. We are all thinking the same thing about this, and yes it's unfortunate, and sad, but  let's get him on the right track as soon as possible so he can find something worthwhile.


I may seem harsh u407, but It is for your own good. Besides, I did not tell you anything you did not already know.
If I were in the area, I would meet up with you and start having some fun, and relax a little.  If you are trying too hard, it's going to show and you can't force fate. Just do what you want, and what comes natural, that makes you smile. Happiness is contagious. When you come across a woman who wants you to have her number,  THEN you can be ready to put the moves on.

Good luck and have fun Dude.

[LAman]

BTW jason....how much time have you spent in FSU?? 
 
It's quite different to be in a strange land with people speaking a language you don't understand and you feel all alone. You don't know where anything is at....don't quite know the culture but there are many very attractive ladies dressed rather provocatively. You end up clinging onto whatever you think you know( girl/interpreter/agency).
 
The OP made some poor choices, big deal, put things back together as best as possible and maybe end up sightseeing or something. I don't know what the OP likes to do. I spent much time in Freedom Park area and hit a couple nice restaurants around sumskaya and hit the clubs at night......just my choice as to what I like to do. Everone is different.
Also, this is a WOVO trip(?), so does it really matter WMVM, WOVO, big/small agency, internet sites, ect....isn't it is all about the choices and decisions we make that determines the outcomes? If your an older man and want a much younger lady, then it is much higher risk than if you chose a lady close to your own age, it is not rocket science.

[Gator]

u4072498,
 
You did not do so bad.  You discovered her insincerity early in your trip.  And the money you spent was minimal.  As Turbo says, many a FSUW playing a man would ask for more.  And some men would pay and continue to see the woman even without any acts of affection. 
 
You are better prepared now to recognize Ms.  Right.
 
I caution you not to develop scammerphobia and consider every FSUW a possible scammer.  Enjoy their company.  The insincere women will reveal themselves without you having to interrogate them or question their every move.

[newjason]

My total time spent in the FSu is around 7 - 8 months.
Many trips to Moscow as that is where my in-laws and extended family still reside. My stepson and I are going there in November again for a few weeks to spend time with the family. I learned to speak Russian when I met my wife. It took many years of practice and I still am deficient.  After she passed away, I lost it, but then began learning again prior to meeting my next Ex. Showing a  willingness to learn and speak the native tongue was essential and even then it was still hard to communicate at times.
 I don't think travelling and trying to cultivate relationships without knowing how to read and write is even feasible.
 
So I can't understand it.

But hey, I travel around the world and Jump off of tall buildings, briddges, and sheer cliffs for fun and relaxation.  So what the hell do i know about being a stranger in a strange land.. 

I actually have more experience with crashing and burning.

[JayH]

 I caution you not to develop scammerphobia and consider every FSUW a possible scammer.  Enjoy their company.  The insincere women will reveal themselves without you having to interrogate them or question their every move.

+1   ---  very important advice

[Stirlitz]

Thanks for your reply Goombah. Will have a full trip report when I finish my trip.
A generic story so far is like: I met a lady from the introduction of an agency. On the first date, we had a dinner in a restaurant, together with an interpreter, where we spent several hours and it costs over 1000 grivna (not including the introduction fee and interpretation fee). I like this lady and we agreed to have a second date.

On the second date, we spent a few hours in a shopping mall (bowling), together with the interpreter. After bowling I ended up in buying the lady a lipstick of 500 grivna. Then the lady suggested to go to a very decent restaurent, where I spent almost 1000 grivna. On this date, I got the lady's mobile phone though she appeared to be a bit reluctant (When she was giving me her mobile number, she checked her mobile for the number and I accidentl saw that she read the number out of sim2 in her mobile screen, and so I guess the number is not her regular mobile number).

I tried to call her later. After several calls, she answered the phone, telling me that her job ask her to move to another city in Russia. But she said that she can be contacted via the interpreter.

I have a strong feeling of being scammed. Hope I am wrong.

You are right. This is classic. It is a professional dater who works with an interpreter mate together. She is not interested in you or other men (usually is married or has a boyfriend) but this is her job. She makes a living this way!
To avoid this, just avoid commercial agencies where you have to pay for correspondence. Communicate with women directly in free dating web sites for locals (however, you will have to find a good translator because if you use the Google tool your success rate will not be great, most women don’t take the mess that comes out of Google seriously; to communicate with good results you need good human translation). Have direct contact information of women in advance! Arrange your own intepreter. If the woman says that she has her own 'interpteter she is comfortable with' - RUN. Do it your way, not hers.
Sorry if it sounds like self-promotion as I am a translator and interpreter - but this is life. And you don't have to hire me.

[LAman]

.
 
I actually have more experience with crashing and burning
.

So you have something in common with newbies!!!!
Thanks for your info jason...I don't remember you ever writing here about your travels to moscow......

[u4072498]

Thanks to everybody!   I won't have scammerphobia.

Update:
Yesterday, Mila contacted me via pm here and she also kindly sent me the profiles of a number of ladies, all of who look gorgeous. I also followed a recommendation from people here to contact a local for some advice. I spent two hours with him and paid him 200 grivnas, which is worth of the money as he is quite helpful. He told me that there is an american guy who was robbed of $7000. This guy brought a lady he met here back to his apartment. Unfortunately this lady stole his $7000 when he was sleeping. Poor dude. I wish him well.

Later in the evening, I went to a cafe near my apartment for some food. It costed me 40 grivnas, very affordable. In the cafe, there were several teenage girls. I couldn't help admiring how young and how beautiful they are! 

After getting full, I registered at VK.com, and started searching for single ladies. I sent out a few messages and a lady, whose profile looks gorgeous and genuine, got back to me that she can meet me on Friday. I was really really happy  and excited. Actually I was so excited that I didn't sleep well last night. It is like standing in the middle of sumskaya street, asking each lady: "hi there, i am single and can you meet me". I have a feeling that Friday will be a good day for me  .

Today, I have no plan so far, and will probably hang around the city center.

[Olly]

After getting full, I registered at VK.com, and started searching for single ladies. I sent out a few messages and a lady, whose profile looks gorgeous and genuine, got back to me that she can meet me on Friday. I was really really happy

Be careful and don't get a new trap. Good luck! 

[newjason]

So you have something in common with newbies!!!!
Thanks for your info jason...I don't remember you ever writing here about your travels to moscow......

I did write a thread about my first wife who was from Moscow who I met while playing in LA.
That thread was not as popular as the Hi I'm Jason thread.  I am guessing because it had no crazy drama and sex , lies, and betrayal included there  lol.

Thanks to everybody!   I won't have scammerphobia.

Update:
Yesterday, Mila contacted me via pm here and she also kindly sent me the profiles of a number of ladies, all of who look gorgeous. I also followed a recommendation from people here to contact a local for some advice. I spent two hours with him and paid him 200 grivnas, which is worth of the money as he is quite helpful. He told me that there is an american guy who was robbed of $7000. This guy brought a lady he met here back to his apartment. Unfortunately this lady stole his $7000 when he was sleeping. Poor dude. I wish him well.

Later in the evening, I went to a cafe near my apartment for some food. It costed me 40 grivnas, very affordable. In the cafe, there were several teenage girls. I couldn't help admiring how young and how beautiful they are! 

After getting full, I registered at VK.com, and started searching for single ladies. I sent out a few messages and a lady, whose profile looks gorgeous and genuine, got back to me that she can meet me on Friday. I was really really happy  and excited. Actually I was so excited that I didn't sleep well last night. It is like standing in the middle of sumskaya street, asking each lady: "hi there, i am single and can you meet me". I have a feeling that Friday will be a good day for me  .

Today, I have no plan so far, and will probably hang around the city center.

u4072498  Good For You  man!
I congratulate you on your ability to evaluate the situation and get back on the horse
I hope to read more of your posts about your romantic adventures and how quickly a man can change lemons into Mike's Hard Lemonaide!   

I am pumped for you dude!  
I was a little nervous that we were too harsh on you as some of the other members had suggested. 

See what happens when you write your own script    you write yourself a happy one
Awesome job u4072498
Keep your smile on and  your eyes open and your thing in your pants. 


I meant wallet   lol

[Muzh]

u407, just meet her for coffee.

Let me recommend a very nice coffee place called Cafe Paris. It is off Pushkinska Metro Station. Maybe the lady knows about it, and if she does, she'll be impressed with you.

Good luck.

[GoodOlBoy]

I sent out a few messages and a lady, whose profile looks gorgeous and genuine, got back to me that she can meet me on Friday.

Way to go dude. 
 
I am pulling for you!
 
Good luck.
 
GOB

[GoodOlBoy]

Keep your smile on and  your eyes open and your thing in your pants.   

Yeah, and if you don't pay attention.... you might get this:
 

He told me that there is an american guy who was robbed of $7000. This guy brought a lady he met here back to his apartment. Unfortunately this lady stole his $7000 when he was sleeping.

An expensive lay. 
 
GOB

[CDW]

there is an american guy who was robbed of $7000. This guy brought a lady he met here back to his apartment. Unfortunately this lady stole his $7000 when he was sleeping. Poor dude. I wish him well.

I cannot understand why this American idiot carried $7,000 in the apartment !!!  Serve him right for being an idiot!!

[Muzh]

I cannot understand why this American idiot carried $7,000 in the apartment !!!  Serve him right for being an idiot!!

I think I answered that.
 
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=15075.msg308849;topicseen#msg308849

[Eduard]

I cannot understand why this American idiot carried $7,000 in the apartment !!!  Serve him right for being an idiot!!

I learned my lesson when I was about 15 and brought a girl home... she was really beautiful but once she was gone, so was my watch!    On the positive side she probably made a great wife to a man who shared her values! 

[u4072498]

Be careful and don't get a new trap. Good luck! 

Thanks Olly. Will be careful and in control 

[CDW]

I learned my lesson when I was about 15 and brought a girl home... she was really beautiful but once she was gone, so was my watch!    On the positive side she probably made a great wife to a man who shared her values! 

You were only 15 but this American idiot is an adult and $7,000  (probably prostitution fees). 

I was brought up not to trust strangers in the 1st night, regardless how beautiful the lady is!

[u4072498]

u407, just meet her for coffee.

Let me recommend a very nice coffee place called Cafe Paris. It is off Pushkinska Metro Station. Maybe the lady knows about it, and if she does, she'll be impressed with you.

Good luck.

Thanks for the recommendation Muzh. Cafe Paris is a perfect choice 

[u4072498]

You were only 15 but this American idiot is an adult and $7,000  (probably prostitution fees). 

I was brought up not to trust strangers in the 1st night, regardless how beautiful the lady is!

Honestly, it is indeed unwise to carry a large amount of cash.

[LAman]

Thanks to everybody!   I won't have scammerphobia.

Update:
Yesterday, Mila contacted me via pm here and she also kindly sent me the profiles of a number of ladies, all of who look gorgeous. I also followed a recommendation from people here to contact a local for some advice. I spent two hours with him and paid him 200 grivnas, which is worth of the money as he is quite helpful. He told me that there is an american guy who was robbed of $7000. This guy brought a lady he met here back to his apartment. Unfortunately this lady stole his $7000 when he was sleeping. Poor dude. I wish him well.

Later in the evening, I went to a cafe near my apartment for some food. It costed me 40 grivnas, very affordable. In the cafe, there were several teenage girls. I couldn't help admiring how young and how beautiful they are! 

After getting full, I registered at VK.com, and started searching for single ladies. I sent out a few messages and a lady, whose profile looks gorgeous and genuine, got back to me that she can meet me on Friday. I was really really happy  and excited. Actually I was so excited that I didn't sleep well last night. It is like standing in the middle of sumskaya street, asking each lady: "hi there, i am single and can you meet me". I have a feeling that Friday will be a good day for me  .

Today, I have no plan so far, and will probably hang around the city center.

I always wonder when someone tells me something that 'is in their best interests'........how true it really is. Maybe possible if a grand or two.....but maybe next year the amount will increase to 10 grand!!! A story is a story.
To the OP, I hope your expectations are low.......and it is just a meeting. Who knows what will happen. Good point about meeting at cafe paris from Muzh. Hopefully it will turn into a long stroll around centre area and you find common interests............... and not a girl shows up with friend/terp dressed as fashion model!!!!!

[BillyB]

This guy brought a lady he met here back to his apartment. Unfortunately this lady stole his $7000 when he was sleeping.

Sleeping was his story. She probably got him horny to the point he dropped his pants then told him to take a shower. Thinking of only one thing, he left his pants behind. A man has two heads but has only enough blood to make one work at a time.
 
Never bring that much cash. Never keep all your money in one spot. Hide it in multiple places. a good place may be in the pockets of folded clothes or in socks. May not be a girl you know that steals the money. There are more than one key to apartments.

[Misha]

Maybe possible if a grand or two.....but maybe next year the amount will increase to 10 grand!!! A story is a story.

Yes, it does sound like a bit of an urban legend. In this day and age, I don't see why anybody would need so much cash given that even towns with five thousand people in Russia have bank machines that accept foreign cards and withdrawals...