Interesting interview with Ukrainian wife in US

[GQBlues]

OLD MEN, COMBAT VETERAN, GOLF STORY

You seem to have little respect much less interest for us senior citizens, but you are a golfer and perhaps you will like this story from yesterday.   
 
 
My Tuesday-Thursday golf group is composed of mostly retired men plus a few working souls who manage to find time every now and then to get away from work and  "honey do" lists.    Our elder statesman is 76, a lovable and true gentleman.  Sabina thought him delightful, and thinking he may be interested in her friends, she asked, "Does the Colonel have any money?"
 
The Colonel did three tours in Vietnam as a helicopter pilot.  Shot down twice.  The second time his entire crew was killed, and he was barely alive when rescued.  While recuperating in a hospital for two months, he learned what was important in life.  And that enlightenment has been his guiding light ever since. 
 
He has many golfing friends, and one of his ex-Army buddies joined us yesterday.  The Colonel said little about him other than he is 82 yo.  I was in his foursome.   That old geezer had a silky swing and beat me on the front nine, shooting a 39.  I was struggling a bit, shooting an 85, and managed to barely beat the 82-yo at the end when he became tired.   When we collected team money from the other foursome, somebody jokingly called the Colonel's friend a "sandbagger."  I responded,  "You can bring any 82-yo you want as long as he hits from the blue tees."    Colonel disclosed after a couple of beers that his friend once won the statewide Senior Golfer Tournament for Washington, decades ago. 
 
Octogenarians can surprise you, not just in golf.

Before you go away, I wish to express my gratitude to you for working and helping to pay my Medicare and Social Security.

So your tombstone dash is about what you avoided in life rather than your joys and accomplishments.


 
If you were not ready for children, I commend you for not having kids.  Coming from a large family, I imagine you have mixed emotions about the decision.   I am not trying to stick my nose into your personal life, but your marriage shares some key similarities with KenC's marriage of 10 years.   Just file that away please; I neither solicit nor want a response (and certainly do not deserve one).


I admit I made a mistake, but your assumption and judgment are off base.  If anything, I am too contented.  But such is the way of older men who have loved much, accomplished much, given much, and still smell the roses every day. 


 
My, my!  You sure harbor much animosity, and towards a man who bought you a beer and tried to help you during your trip to Moscow.
 
Life is not a dress rehearsal. 

I advise you to learn how to focus on the joys of life and to ignore the little annoyances.

My! Got your writing fingers working, eh?
I'm elated my message actually hit home, Gator.     There's still time left to right that tired ol' ship before it fades over the horizon.  You can always rely on me to give you more life's direction in case you need it.

You should really take the time to let everyone know what happened with your ex-wife. Things like that is what's so important for these newbies to understand what can happen to folks like you when they search for happiness for the wrong reason$$.

[oldernotwiser]

What is your message GQ?  Are you trying to say that you are more noble and pure than others in your actions(and you are so happy about that you want to proclaim it loudly and often)?  That people should pursue happiness according to your plan?


While I might not agree with some others actions from time to time, that doesn't mean that I think I have all the answers.  And in my opinion, if someone is not deceitful and acting with good intent, obeying the law, they should be able to pursue happiness in the manner they choose. 

[Mod3]

My! Got your writing fingers working, eh?
I'm elated my message actually hit home, Gator.     There's still time left to right that tired ol' ship before it fades over the horizon.  You can always rely on me to give you more life's direction in case you need it.

You should really take the time to let everyone know what happened with your ex-wife. Things like that is what's so important for these newbies to understand what can happen to folks like you when they search for happiness for the wrong reason$$.

GQBlues.

Remember that everyone here has the right to disclose as little or much about their personal life and marriage as they wish to. Discussing a marriage and hinting at motives is off limits without the member requesting an opinion.

[pitbull]

 
If you were not ready for children, I commend you for not having kids.  Coming from a large family, I imagine you have mixed emotions about the decision.   I am not trying to stick my nose into your personal life, but your marriage shares some key similarities with KenC's marriage of 10 years.   Just file that away please; I neither solicit nor want a response (and certainly do not deserve one).

I am not aware of those two marriages' details, but from what I've read over the years on this forum, and from seeing GQ and his wife on a TV show shortly after she arrived, as well as knowing what she has achieved now... There is NOTHING similar about these two marriages, other than being between a man and a woman. Primarily because of the respective personalities, attitudes and capabilities (like drive and intellect) of the people involved. No matter how much GQ and myself differ on our views on politics - a marriage and attitude to marriage like his is what I would wish for any FSUW coming to the US.

[Ranetka]

I am not aware of those two marriages' details, but from what I've read over the years on this forum, and from seeing GQ and his wife on a TV show shortly after she arrived, as well as knowing what she has achieved now... There is NOTHING similar about these two marriages, other than being between a man and a woman. Primarily because of the respective personalities, attitudes and capabilities (like drive and intellect) of the people involved. No matter how much GQ and myself differ on our views on politics - a marriage and attitude to marriage like his is what I would wish for any FSUW coming to the US.

+1.


Plus the attitude to wife's parents/family is certainly to wish for.

[Slumba]

I am not aware of those two marriages' details, but from what I've read over the years on this forum, and from seeing GQ and his wife on a TV show shortly after she arrived, as well as knowing what she has achieved now... There is NOTHING similar about these two marriages, other than being between a man and a woman. Primarily because of the respective personalities, attitudes and capabilities (like drive and intellect) of the people involved. No matter how much GQ and myself differ on our views on politics - a marriage and attitude to marriage like his is what I would wish for any FSUW coming to the US.

Is there a place, where this video can be seen?  Was it part of a regular TV show of some kind?  Sorry, I don't know the history involved.

[jone]

I am not aware of those two marriages' details, but from what I've read over the years on this forum, and from seeing GQ and his wife on a TV show shortly after she arrived, as well as knowing what she has achieved now... There is NOTHING similar about these two marriages, other than being between a man and a woman. Primarily because of the respective personalities, attitudes and capabilities (like drive and intellect) of the people involved. No matter how much GQ and myself differ on our views on politics - a marriage and attitude to marriage like his is what I would wish for any FSUW coming to the US.

I thought you agreed with everyone on politics!   

[Daveman]

I thought you agreed with everyone on politics!   

Ahhh, so we've been through promotion, morality, ethics, age gaps, diaper pooping, agencies, sincerity, golf, and now politics...


Interesting thread.. let's go for the crescendo!


.. bunch o' religious zealots!   

[pitbull]

 1.


Plus the attitude to wife's parents/family is certainly to wish for.

Of course, this too!!
 
"Drumroll"
 
GQ is getting yet more brownie points to his brownie point list! 

[pitbull]

Is there a place, where this video can be seen?  Was it part of a regular TV show of some kind?  Sorry, I don't know the history involved.

 i don't remember - was a long time ago 

[pitbull]

I thought you agreed with everyone on politics!   

One thing you can be sure of - I do give credit where credit is due 

[Slumba]

 i don't remember - was a long time ago 

Anyone?  Bueller?

[anm8tr]

The age difference was a big issue for me in the beginning. And I didn't want to live in the U.S. It took us over 3 years to move forward and tie the knot. The truth is, Nobody ever made me feel better and happier than he did/does.
My point is, before anybody makes any judgements, you need to understand that there are cases when people just fall in love, and make a conscientious decision to live this life together.

I hope everyone here finds their peace and comfort in their lives!

I couldn't agree with you more! Well put!  Many here seem to think there is an official rule book on what constitutes a valid relationship including what they deem to be proper societal and acceptable behavior. Forget about the fact that two people simply want to be together.

[Ade]

Anyone?  Bueller?

Boethius could tell you if you asked nicely.

[Muzh]

I couldn't agree with you more! Well put!  Many here seem to think there is an official rule book on what constitutes a valid relationship including what they deem to be proper societal and acceptable behavior. Forget about the fact that two people simply want to be together.

I'm really glad you feel this way. Seriously. 

Now, what constitutes a real relationship? Is it one where either party has to communicate via interpreter?

AND, if they can communicate with a common language can the communicate about common wants? (i.e., the wants of a 50+ yo man vs. the wants of a 20 something woman)

I believe this is what the guys with the T-shirt are trying to postulate.

[Shadow]

I'm really glad you feel this way. Seriously. 

Now, what constitutes a real relationship? Is it one where either party has to communicate via interpreter?

AND, if they can communicate with a common language can the communicate about common wants? (i.e., the wants of a 50+ yo man vs. the wants of a 20 something woman)

I believe this is what the guys with the T-shirt are trying to postulate.

The "wants" of a 50-year old man are a nice body that he can exchange when it starts to deteriorate.

The "wants" of a young woman are large pockets and a mule to carry them.

Combine it and they may want to be together.

Added: I am very aware that there are many cases of genuine compatibility and love, and some can stand against time. However it takes a very bright man to search until he found a match that leaves him no doubt, as well as it takes a very strong character in a woman not to take the easy way out.

On the forums I have met a couple of exceptions to the cynical description I made. While it is not my habit to look in the bedroom and in general I keep contacts only on forum level, they do seem genuine.
But the deluded men are still a majority, and they are often the ones that fade out until posting a crash and burn a couple of years later.

[Muzh]

The "wants" of a 50-year old man are a nice body that he can exchange when it starts to deteriorate.

The "wants" of a young woman are large pockets and a mule to carry them.

Combine it and they may want to be together.

As long as it works for them.

[Faux Pas]

As long as it works for them.

But alas, the reality is that very few do. Even when entered by both parties usually during the euphoria stage with the very best of intentions. Eventually, the reality of the age disparity begins to take hold.

That said and without any judgment or prejudice, what is the best leg of advice for a newbie in his 50s-70s with ideas for a 20-30 year old woman? Sure guy go for it? Keep the wallet full and the viagra popping and your cardiologist on speed dial?

GQ came out with some pretty scathing words but there is a lot of wisdom there IMHO. Those offended by it maybe suffering just a tad of denial.

[Shadow]

A personal friend would never keep a woman over 30.
'He was married twice and then continued living together without marriage, to make it easier for him to get out.

As he was a charmer, he could pick up women between 20 and 25, have a good time with them until they turned 30, after which he would simply leave them or kick them to the curb while getting a newer model.

He even managef to live on their money, so no big wallets. The girls were often heart broken, and usually could compete with the best FSUW.

Its just a habit some men have, and somehow they get what they want.
For every clueless man there is an equally clueless woman.

[Daveman]

...

GQ came out with some pretty scathing words but there is a lot of wisdom there IMHO. Those offended by it maybe suffering just a tad of denial.

Indeed.  Yet, GQ is also in a large age gap relationship as are many others, myself included (11 years). Yes, men come here and elsewhere seeking justification and validation for what they're doing.  We will all face the "pampers" phase ahead of the lady.  What exactly creates the differences in what myself, or GQ does and someone who starts out "later"?  A larger age disparity?  Expecting or believing in the possibility of real love?  Unless the women are being kidnapped they are choosing such paths as well.


What makes *us* better than *them*?  That's the part that doesn't make sense to me.  I'll turn 50 in less than a month (of course I look younger, as do we all). 


So if we are going to get to the heart of the matter, then let's get to it.  What's the real issue(s) here?

[Muzh]

What is the real issue?

For example, my ex wife and my wife are of the same age. As a matter of fact, my wife is a couple of months 'older' than my ex. (Please don't tell her I said that.) 

Yet, according to you I have a 'large' age gap. Thirteen years.

So, what is the issue?

Is it a man who will never be able to pull a 20 year difference at home but goes to an impoverish country to find such a creature?

[Faux Pas]

Indeed.  Yet, GQ is also in a large age gap relationship as are many others, myself included (11 years). Yes, men come here and elsewhere seeking justification and validation for what they're doing.  We will all face the "pampers" phase ahead of the lady.  What exactly creates the differences in what myself, or GQ does and someone who starts out "later"?  A larger age disparity?  Expecting or believing in the possibility of real love?  Unless the women are being kidnapped they are choosing such paths as well.


What makes *us* better than *them*?  That's the part that doesn't make sense to me.  I'll turn 50 in less than a month (of course I look younger, as do we all). 


So if we are going to get to the heart of the matter, then let's get to it.  What's the real issue(s) here?

It's your average run-of-the-mill age gap thread ad nausea except this one is specifically directed at senior men or as GQ put it, stickybunz.  Just as a reminder it got here from calmissle starting this thread with info and then a contributor from Mark Davis's marketing tools.

The whole, FSUW don't mind big age gaps idea and marketing ploy is as most FSUW will tell you, bullshit. They are not much different from women the world over in that regard. "Most" 20s, 30s somethings+ women are not looking for a 60+ older man. That's not to say that some are not. I'd guess that is exactly what "some" are looking for, for various reasons. Even those, are not looking for the older yet "youthful appearance", fit body for a man in his 60's or his viagra fueled insatisable sexual prowess. "Most" of those likely have ulterior motive. To deny that would seem to be living in a large degree of denial IMHO

[Faux Pas]

What is the real issue?

For example, my ex wife and my wife are of the same age. As a matter of fact, my wife is a couple of months 'older' than my ex. (Please don't tell her I said that.) 

Yet, according to you I have a 'large' age gap. Thirteen years.

So, what is the issue?

Is it a man who will never be able to pull a 20 year difference at home but goes to an impoverish country to find such a creature?

Muzh, in my single years I pulled a number of 20 yr gaps with AW for fun and party. We even called them dates. While I never had this specific conversation with any of them, we both knew the score. They were not interested in me for a husband nor I them for a wife. That did not count when it came to certain experience and ability to finance the fun and party, if you know what I mean. That's IME the AW version and I'm pretty sure the FSUW's version isn't much different. 

[Muzh]

Muzh, in my single years I pulled a number of 20 yr gaps with AW for fun and party. We even called them dates. While I never had this specific conversation with any of them, we both knew the score. They were not interested in me for a husband nor I them for a wife. That did not count when it came to certain experience and ability to finance the fun and party, if you know what I mean. That's IME the AW version and I'm pretty sure the FSUW's version isn't much different. 

Somehow I knew you could pull that kind of stuff, pardner 

[southernX]

But alas, the reality is that very few do. Even when entered by both parties usually during the euphoria stage with the very best of intentions. Eventually, the reality of the age disparity begins to take hold.


GQ came out with some pretty scathing words but there is a lot of wisdom there IMHO. Those offended by it maybe suffering just a tad of denial.

id second this above,

the main reason this big age gap disparity is given the green light is cause a bunch of blokes really want to believe  it is possible for them , and yep most are in denial imho ,

in reality it is a rarity in their own countrys

the only person galyna needed to convince of her moral integrity & trustworthyness  was her husband , and she has
to the rest it is small bickies

SX