Just Starting out -- How about that Age Difference

[Muzh]

Really great feedback and advice...thanks.  It sounds like there are many different approaches but no matter which course you choose it really is about time management...I also like the idea of spending more time in country and learning more about their customs and perhaps even enough of Russian to appear to be able to show you are trying...

That's an excellent idea. That will help you dismiss a lot of myths and misconceptions touted by the "service providers" and others, like this one beauty here...

village girls vs city girls is a hard one for me and since I haven't been it seems the first trip or two could be spent in a larger city to get a feel for how this works...I guess the biggest challenge I face and would assume most guys face is being able to determine is the girl playing you or not...but if she invites you to see her friends, or opens up more with her personal family life could be a great sign...I read where most of the posts here suggest you should talk with a girl on Skype which makes a lot of sense to me...do most of the girls even have a computer (especially from the smaller towns)...and of course google transalate makes it all the more easier to do...I guess if the girl really likes you that she will find a way...again, thanks for all the advice...I guess I have a ton of things to learn before I go....

A simple piece of advice. If you can pull the stunt of dating girls (notice the plural word) that are 20+ years younger than you in your town, then, by all means go for it.

However, if you try this stunt (again, at home) and they laugh at your face, then forget it and concentrate on ladies more age appropriate.

You can find a teenage dyev that will marry you. Problem is you were not trying to play the role of a mule.

Good luck and welcome.

[Anechka]

You can find a teenage dyev that will marry you. Problem is you were not trying to play the role of a mule.

Good luck and welcome.

Yeah, it all depends on the amount on your bank account and the girl's desire to move to the USA 

When I was 20, I thought 50-year-olds are really old (quite difficult to explain my ignorance)...
I'm 30 now, I wouldn't be able to marry a man who is 20 years older, but this is just my personal preference....

[Ranetka]

[quote author=Anechka link=topic=15648.msg323257#msg323257 date=136077384



When I was 20, I thought 50-year-olds are really old (quite difficult to explain my ignorance)...
I'm 30 now, I wouldn't be able to marry a man who is 20 years older, but this is just my personal preference....



When I was 20 I thought 30 yo were really old. 50 years olds for me just did not exist! 

[Anechka]

Ranetka,  I was too shy to spell that out... I thought there was no life after 30... So here we are 

All 50+ were babushkas and dedushkas to me, though there are young girls who prefer old guys (I would say, the older, the better) who have lots of money on their accounts (like a few billion dollars) ...

[Daveman]

Now now ladies, you know we all look young! So, the common wisdom and/or preferences don't apply! 

[Misha]

Ironically, if I look at my colleagues, most have 20+ gaps with their wives/partners/girlfriends, and they are all with fellow Canadians. I am the one with the reasonable 10-year age gap 

[Anechka]

Misha, the majority of my friends have 3-5 year gap, a few 10-year gap, but not more. However, all of us got married in 20's (early or late). But the majority of my friends are Russian, we graduated the university together (so called "faculty of brides", literature and linguistics department of the teachers' university)
 

[Misha]

Misha, the majority of my friends have 3-5 year gap, a few 10-year gap, but not more. However, all of us got married in 20's (early or late). But the majority of my friends are Russian, we graduated the university together (so called "faculty of brides", literature and linguistics department of the teachers' university)
 

Ah, there is the rub. Yes, if you marry while in university, you will invariably marry someone your age or close to it. However, if a woman or man does not manage to get married in their early twenties or get divorced, then other options will invariably be explored...

[cc3]

Lol, well, my husband calls the noise "women's logic", you don't have to understand it 

Hmm, were frying pans and plates really that close? I doubt  However, that's the only method we, women, know that helps us to prove our point to our stubborn men 

The point is still the same, try to learn some Russian, firstly, your women can be proud of you even if you haven't done much progress, but you still keep trying, secondly, your trip to FSU will be much easier if you know a few words in Russian...

Due to my interest in Ukrainian culture and history, I plan to study Ukrainian first. My Russian- speaking Ukrainian fiancee understands my motivation and totally supports my preference to learn some Ukrainian before Russian. She's, of course, completely fluent and extremely literate (studying Ukrainian at the university level) in Ukrainian.

[cc3]

Well, Russian is quite popular language, if you check here - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_language

It is one of the official UN language - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Official_languages_of_the_United_Nations

In addition, Russia is the biggest country at the moment 

Btw, it's always nice to speak 2 or 3 languages. So how many languages do you speak?

English, Italian (majored in the language in US Naval Academy), passing acquaintance with French.

[cc3]

Back to you, jetjockey...this thread was getting really off track...partly my fault. So, you are or were a military, corporate or airline professional? I am retired Continental/United (B-777, B-767, B-757, B-727, B-737, DC-10), former USMC fighter (F-4J, A-4F-SuperFox) jock, former Lockheed A-4S (Singapore Air Force) test pilot.

[CanadaMan]

The 1% in Russia, just as in the USA, are becoming more wealthy...does not mean that the whole world must become familiar with Russian, as it must with English.

If anyone should know, it would be you, Eduard, that the wealthiest 1% in Russia undoubtedly speak very good English.  Maria Sharapova speaks with absolutely no accent;  she sounds more American than most Americans. Should American tennis players learn Russian because some of the best players in the world are Russian?

As someone who is a huge tennis fan, fan of Sharapova, and not too shabby at English, I must say Sharapova is not exactly the best example of a Russian ambassador for the English language. 

Her English vocabulary is extremely limited (not the sharpest knife in the drawer) and there is a touch of a non-native accent to her speech.

But she's a great tennis player! 

[Anotherkiwi]

As someone who is a huge tennis fan, fan of Sharapova, and not too shabby at English, I must say Sharapova is not exactly the best example of a Russian ambassador for the English language. 

Her English vocabulary is extremely limited (not the sharpest knife in the drawer) and there is a touch of a non-native accent to her speech.

But she's a great tennis player! 

Side-bar, Your Honour:
 
I don't know whio is worse to watch - Sharapova or Azarenka     Put them together and you start wishing that you were a fan of cheese-rolling, nose hockey or some other weird (but quiet!) sport.  Thank goodness for players like Aga Radwanska.

[SANDRO43]

Thank goodness for players like Aga Radwanska.

Because she doesn't 'grunt' (shriek/scream) while playing?

This noisy habit was apparently started by Monica Seles and Jimmy Connors, and Maria Sharapova is officially credited with reaching 101 decibels (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grunting_(tennis)).

There are a number of explanations of why some tennis players use it. I think that this violent exhalation permits them a wider and more forceful racket swing by emptying their lungs.   

[Belvis]

As someone who is a huge tennis fan, fan of Sharapova, and not too shabby at English, I must say Sharapova is not exactly the best example of a Russian ambassador for the English language. 

Her English vocabulary is extremely limited (not the sharpest knife in the drawer) and there is a touch of a non-native accent to her speech.

I have no idea about her vocabulary in Russian, probably the same as in English. She's living in US since 8 y.o., so now she's got a slight accent when speaking Russian.

[CanadaMan]

I don't know whio is worse to watch - Sharapova or Azarenka     Put them together and you start wishing that you were a fan of cheese-rolling, nose hockey or some other weird (but quiet!) sport.  Thank goodness for players like Aga Radwanska.

Minus Maria's shrieking and her painfully slow service setup, I enjoy watching her play quite a bit. I must admit a lot of that has to do with the 'eye candy' effect. 

I agree, Radwanska is a joy to watch.

[CanadaMan]

There are a number of explanations of why some tennis players use it. I think that this violent exhalation permits them a wider and more forceful racket swing by emptying their lungs.   

That's one. Another is the deliberate use of it in an attempt to intimidate your opponent.
It's funny how quiet the shriekers and grunters become as soon as they fall to a losing position in a match.   

[CanadaMan]

This noisy habit was apparently started by Monica Seles and Jimmy Connors, and Maria Sharapova is officially credited with reaching 101 decibels (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grunting_(tennis)).

I found this a bit by accident just now.
These folks know a thing or two about the subject I must admit.

• Tennis world's top 10 grunters As world no 1 Caroline Wozniacki calls for the tennis world to cut out the grunters and accuses some of her rivals of shrieking on purpose in a bid to distract an opponent, Telegraph Sport looks at the top 10 loudest offenders on the women's tour. By Telegraph staff
  8:58AM BST 26 Oct 2011
  
  
  1. Maria Sharapova, 101 decibels Russian: undisputed queen of grunts; enjoys climactic shriek of the blue-movie variety. Apparently afflicted since the age of four, made all the more remarkable in that she doesn't emit a peep when practicing. Even known to grunt when utilising slice: some achievement. In decibels, is the equivalent of an aeroplane landing, and approaching the threshold of comfort. Some say exceeding it.
   
  2. Michelle Larcher De Brito, decibel level unconfirmed Portuguese: Sharapova's heir apparent. More of a screech; stands out for consistency and duration. Spectators are treated to an experience similar to one they might expect to receive standing in the crowd at a Formula One race. Opponents, notably Aravane Rezaï of France, have complained strenuously. Has forced tennis officials from the grand-slam tournament office to demand a meeting before Wimbledon.
   
  3. Monica Seles, 93.2 decibels American: one of the earliest exponents of the female grunt; inspiration behind the Centre Court "grunt-o-meter". Unusual in that she adopted a two tone scream, characterised by an anticipatory moan followed immediately by a louder, high pitched groan of exertion. Unique in that she toned down the grunt after being threatened with a fine at Wimbledon, although now claims that doing so is one of her biggest regrets.
   
  4. Serena Williams, 88.9 decibels American: possessed of an aggressive grunt of low pitch variety, which increases in timbre when excited or with particular physical exertion. Responded well when played recordings of her grunt on an episode of Friday Night with Jonathan Ross, but remains one of the worst offenders on tour. Equivalent in decibels to the noise made by a jackhammer when heard from across a single lane road.
   
  5. Venus Williams, 85 decibels American: quieter than her sister – just. Her higher pitched scream, complete with warble, conveys anxiety, and could plausibly be confused with a new-born foal sinking in quicksand. Featured in one of the most amusing matches in Wimbledon history, against Sharapova in 2007, which even had the commentators sniggering. Funny at first, soon becomes incredibly irritating.
   
   6. Victoria Azarenka, 83.5 decibels Belarusian: one of a more modern breed favouring the short, sharp cry. Consistent in volume and tone, and came to notice in the absence of Sharapova from the tour. In terms of decibels, her shriek produces results similar to those that would be expected to be recorded inside a train station.
   
  7. Elena Bovina, 81 decibels Russian: an established grunter on the women's tour. From the Seles school of double-syllable shrieks, but especially high-pitched. Sounds like a dying animal on every stroke, and is particularly distressing to witness. Impressive stature of 6'2" makes for excellent projection. Generates decibel levels similar to a pneumatic tool from 15 metres.
  8. Anna Kournikova, 78.5 decibels Russian: in truth only noisy when under strain. Favoured a classical grunt, evocative of authentic endeavour, rather than the more modern breed of tactical, sustained screeching. Certainly doesn't look like the back end of a bus, but as far as decibel levels are concerned, sounded like one.
  9. Kim Clijsters, 75 decibels Belgian: similar to Kournikova. Only audible when applying herself especially hard, typified by a low gutteral sound when striking the ball. Brought on by effort, not tactics.
   
  10. Elena Dementieva, 73 decibels Russian: boasts two different types of scream. The first, in evidence throughout average rallies and early points, is the relatively common-place high-pitched cry, found among many female players. The second, however, climbs to a shriek, most often heard on important points and towards the end of a long, strenuous rally. Definitely dictated by pressure.
   
   
   

[Muzh]

All this loud grunting from the female tennis players because there is a big age gap between them??

[Eduard]

The 1% in Russia, just as in the USA, are becoming more wealthy...does not mean that the whole world must become familiar with Russian, as it must with English.

If anyone should know, it would be you, Eduard, that the wealthiest 1% in Russia undoubtedly speak very good English.  Maria Sharapova speaks with absolutely no accent;  she sounds more American than most Americans. Should American tennis players learn Russian because some of the best players in the world are Russian?

I would be very surprised if Russian became a global language in a few years. Mainly because Russian is the language of a repressive and restrictive society. Russian arbiters of culture and language do not want to open up to the world, because they do not want any outside influences affecting their culture and language any more than they already have. When I see a Russian company develop a major global OS, competing with Windows and IOS for the world's computers, or an international web browser that is globally adopted, outside of the CIS countries, then, maybe, I will relent in my oppositional feelings... or, for something more dear to hearts here in the forum, when Russian speakers make a paradigm shift to value pleasant human relations more highly than they generally do now.

With the greatest respect, because I agree wholeheartedly with 99% of your posts, and because my fiancee is a native Russian speaker (who totally accepts and supports my desire to learn Ukrainian first).

We'll have to agree to disagree on this one )) By the way, Maria Sharapova lives about 45 minutes away from me. I actually have met her mom, Elena once here in Sarasota. There is a world famous Balleteri tennis academy here in Bradenton (which is the next town to Sarasota) so most tennis players from all over the world come here to go through a program there.

[Turboguy]

Did she say "Nice to meet you." or was she a grunter?

[Eduard]

Did she say "Nice to meet you." or was she a grunter?

LOL, neither )) But it was funny to be standing there with 3 Elenas!

[Manny]

JJ, as a person who has seen lots of translations done by electronic translators and who is fluent in both English and Russian I can tell you one thing: You will be playing the proverbial "Russian Roulette" most of the time and only really understand who you married after yo have been married for at least a year and she would have learned English to the point where you two can communicate without having to use any e-translation. This goes both ways by the way. Am FSU woman who marries a WM who she gets to know with the help of e-translator only will only start realising who she married after she learns English and has been married to the man for a year or so. I personally know women who married American men and once they learned English and got to know them got disillusioned and left.
I'm sorry but when I see people who use e-translators advising others to use e-translators to me it looks like "The blind leading the blind".


Now there is definitely a place for e-translators for part of the time- when you skype with your lady or on dates when you want to spend some one-on-one time. But you should try to spend as much time as possible communicating with a woman with no language barrier at all. Only then you have at least a decent chance of getting to know who she is before marriage.
Let's face it, women can be hard to figure out even when you and her come from the same culture and speak the same language. Trying to figure out each other using e-translators where only about 30% gets translated correctly, the other 30% sounds like some strange secret code, the other 30% is translated with the opposite meaning (completely wrong) of what was intended, and 10% will spell out Russian words without attempting to translate them. I haven't calculated the exact percentages off course, but you get the idea.

I'll agree with Ed on most of that.


e-translations can be handy for small day-to-day stuff. But when it matters, you want a person doing it.


You cant really build a relationship on e-translations.

[calmissile]

I'll agree with Ed on most of that.


e-translations can be handy for small day-to-day stuff. But when it matters, you want a person doing it.


You cant really build a relationship on e-translations.

Disagree on some and agree with part.

6 months ago I would have agreed that you can't build a relationship with either a human or e-translator.  Imagine trying to be romantic with a person in the middle translating.  Very awkward to say the least.

We used Skype with Google translate up until a few months ago.  It was so painfull for both us that we would be worn out in about 1/2 hour.  With the free  "Skype Translate" program, we are chatting on Skype for 1-2 hours a day with ease.  Other than occasional clarification of words that do not translate, it is the best thing I have found for real time translation on Skype.  Also, video Skype gives the visual feedback that is necessary to build a romantic relationship.  Surely it is not a substitute for being together in person, but it is the next best thing.   Imagine sending a letter to a human translator and then waiting for it to be translated.  Very time consuming and maybe expensive.

As far a translation for things that are important, I agree with the comments.  Using an interpreter is the best way to make sure the translations are accurate.   There is also another e-tanslator program that is very good at this although it is cumbersome and expensive.  It is called LEC translator.  It provides real time reverse translation and allows you to change the original text in order to get the correct meaning translated.

In any case, most people should be able to carry on a romance using Skype and 'Skype Translator" and only use a human translator for important or complicated matters.

Just my personal experience.

[Eduard]

Disagree on some and agree with part.

6 months ago I would have agreed that you can't build a relationship with either a human or e-translator.  Imagine trying to be romantic with a person in the middle translating.  Very awkward to say the least.

We used Skype with Google translate up until a few months ago.  It was so painfull for both us that we would be worn out in about 1/2 hour.  With the free  "Skype Translate" program, we are chatting on Skype for 1-2 hours a day with ease.  Other than occasional clarification of words that do not translate, it is the best thing I have found for real time translation on Skype.  Also, video Skype gives the visual feedback that is necessary to build a romantic relationship.  Surely it is not a substitute for being together in person, but it is the next best thing.   Imagine sending a letter to a human translator and then waiting for it to be translated.  Very time consuming and maybe expensive.

As far a translation for things that are important, I agree with the comments.  Using an interpreter is the best way to make sure the translations are accurate.   There is also another e-tanslator program that is very good at this although it is cumbersome and expensive.  It is called LEC translator.  It provides real time reverse translation and allows you to change the original text in order to get the correct meaning translated.

In any case, most people should be able to carry on a romance using Skype and 'Skype Translator" and only use a human translator for important or complicated matters.

Just my personal experience.

Doug, problem is that a lot of the time you don't even know when things are not translated correctly. You think you understand, but she might have intended a completely different meaning... But I hope that you have met a really womderful woman so even if the translation is bad your relationship will still work out. Sometimes people just get lucky.