Where to find an American fiancee?

[Larry1]

Does anyone here like Match.com ? Would this work ?

Match.com certainly has a huge number of American guys, although it's possible that Katerina would encounter the same difficulty that she had on POF, of guys there not being interested because of the distance. A couple of years ago a friend of mine in Eastern Europe went on Match.com to set up a profile that would enable her to meet guys in the US.  If I recall correctly she told me that Match wouldn't allow her to set it up and she believed it was because of where she was located.

I don't know for sure if this was the correct reason, and if it was correct whether Match still has that policy.  Katerina could always try to set up a profile there.

[Chicagoguy]

Larry1
I now remember I have heard this same story myself.

[CanadaMan]

Hi Katerina and welcome to RWD!

Perhaps this is a time to pause, reflect and take stock of what you have?

A fellow compatriot, Vasilisa, recently posted 30+ reasons why she feels Russia is superior to the U.S.

She talks from experience, having been married and lived in the U.S.

If you click on  Quote from: Vasilisa on Today at 15:49:37 it will take you directly to her complete post.

[ML]

Katerina, here are the list of sites that are recommended to men who are looking for Former Soviet Union Women (FSUW).

So the same sites would be your best bet to find an American Man (AM) who was looking for a FSUW.

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=14615.0

[Lily]

I have an account on pof.com, but guys on there are not very happy with the fact that im Russian

Any advice, guys?))

What does it mean - not happy with the fact of you being Russian?    Do you declare it right away in your profile? If so, why?
 
My understanding is that you are in Northern America, and that you look for a local man. Please correct me if this is wrong.
 
Not sure that it would be a good thing to market yourself as a Russian. There is a great choice of men here, and not everyone is familiar with Russia at all. My suggestion for you Katerina would be to think about a type of man who you would like to find, and make a textual (profile) and visual (photos) communication on the chosen site which should portray you as an attractive wife/girlfriend material for your type of man. You could make a hint on your Slavic origin, but anything more than that would be an overkill, in my view.
 
Regarding the websites, in my opinion and from my experience with Northern American dating so far, nothing beats the PoF if you know what you are looking for. It is free, after all. A few paid features, in my view, do not add any significant advantage. It also has a forum to learn about the newly added technicalities, where one could get advice on almost any possible situation or question.
 
Match com is only good if you pay for membership, not sure whether you would want it.

[Misha]

What does it mean - not happy with the fact of you being Russian?    Do you declare it right away in your profile? If so, why?

I expect that 22 to 25 year old men who are on POF are looking for a local woman, not one where they will have to get a visa and fly to another country...

[Larry1]

My understanding is that you are in Northern America, and that you look for a local man. Please correct me if this is wrong.

I think there has been a miscommunication.  Katerina lived in the US for some time but is now back in Russia.

Ive been to America for 3 summers while I was a student - fall in love with the country but was too busy with work to actually look for someone to date. Since im about to graduate, i feel like its time to create a family, and I would like to have that family in the country I like.

Regarding applying for a US visa:

I did apply for one a month ago, but got rejected for no reason - guess i didnt prove that i have very strong ties to my country

[JohnDearGreen]

I have an account on pof.com, but guys on there are not very happy with the fact that im Russian
Any advice, guys?))

On the low-end, most guys in their 20's don't have the cash savings for international dating.  And they would rather spend it on a new sports car than 3 trips to Siberia.  That is one reason there are mostly older men on forums like this one.   But if you have what it takes to attract men on the high-end, then there are professional for-hire matchmakers in every major US city who might be willing to help you find someone.
Example: http://www.samanthastable.com/Redesign/content/whatisit.asp

[Misha]

That and the fact that attractive successful young men generally don't have to go overseas to find attractive young women to date Older men though they say otherwise go overseas to date and marry the women they can't find at home...

[TwoBitBandit]

 

Im 22 y.o., and looking for 20-30 y.o. guy. Im also very picky, so there has to be a choice

If you want to try some of the sites oriented toward western men looking for Russian girls, you can try elenasmodels.com, russian-dating.com or russiancupid.com (in addition to the sites some others have mentioned).
 
I think that your chance is almost zero in the age range you’re targeting.  The problems are:
1. An American guy under 30 has a huge choice among Russian girls.  Unless you’re model-level beautiful, you’re not going to stand out.
 
2.  Most guys under 30 don’t have their act together enough to travel to Ekaterinburg.  In fact, most Americans don’t even have a passport.  Your chance of meeting a guy on a western dating site (pof, etc) who is willing and able to go to the Urals is small.
 
3.  Most guys get involved in this endeavor because they are looking for younger women.   I wouldn’t consider anyone under 30 with you pushing the envelope.
 
4.  You’ve stated that you’re “very picky” in addition to wanting the guy no older than 30.  I’d be pretty surprised if any online relationship with a twentysomething guy led to him even showing up in Ekaterinburg, much less being attractive enough to meet your bar.
 
My recommendation is that you consider men up to 35.  Even then your competition will be fierce but at least you have a small chance instead of “practically zero” chance.
 

[BillyB]

  I think that your chance is almost zero in the age range you’re targeting. 

I agree to that and if Kokopelli wants to marry an American man 20-30 yo, she may be waiting a long time and it may never happen. If the ages of the men in this endeavor are represented by the men in this forum, then there are very few men between the ages of 20-30 looking for a foreign wife. When I was 20-30, I wouldn't never think about looking overseas for a wife. Most every American man are going to have their first marriage with an American woman or at least with a foreign woman living in America.

[Katerina07]

Maryland  only?
Largest city near you, Omsk?
To compare, New York is like Moscow.
Balitmore's population is 619,493.

Maybe this?
http://www.indeed.com/q-Russian-Linguist-jobs.html

Any U.S. companies in your area needing your skills? Russian teaching positions at some colleges?
Check for U.S. companies operating in Russia or doing business with Russia.
Did you keep in contact with the people you met in Maryland?

Ive been to New York too. Largest city near me is Yekaterinburg - thats where I live.
Ive tried looking for any possible jobs out there, belive me, sent millions of resumes, but they all require me to have a permanent residency.

[Katerina07]

What does it mean - not happy with the fact of you being Russian?    Do you declare it right away in your profile? If so, why?
 
My understanding is that you are in Northern America, and that you look for a local man. Please correct me if this is wrong.
 

I live in Russia at the moment, so I dont want to lie that I dont. When they would want to meet me, they find out anyway.

[Shadow]

I think the answer to look for interest groups regarding your hobbies is a very good one. We have one example here (Aloe and her husband) of a young marriage that started out that way.

IMHO a better solution as changing your requirements for the perfect husband.

[Lily]

IMHO a better solution as changing your requirements for the perfect husband.

IMHO a better solution would be to identify the target group, to make yourself as desirable to them as possible, and start working towards your goal. It would be great if you could find a way to move to the U.S., and start looking here.
 

I live in Russia at the moment, so I dont want to lie that I dont. When they would want to meet me, they find out anyway.

Oh, I see. Then my comments make little sense. Sorry!
 
Does PoF now accept members who are physically in Russia?
 

[Katerina07]

 
Oh, I see. Then my comments make little sense. Sorry!
 
Does PoF now accept members who are physically in Russia?

It doesnt but i made an account there two weeks before leaving the states last summer ))

[jazztropy]

Try OKCupid.  They accept profiles who are physically anywhere, including Russia.  Best of all, membership is free.  There are many more men than women.

Good luck in your search.

[Aloe]

Katerina, i don't know how experienced you are in online dating, but when you do register on all those sites, don't let your spirits drop when you get messages from 60 year olds   
It can't hurt to keep a profile up on all those sites, just have to take them with a dose of cynicism
And do inform yourself about keyboard romeos before you start. It's a real plague! So try not to commit to anyone you haven't met, cuz tons of men will write until the end of times about the wonderful marriage they see with you and keep promising to visit, and never actually do it. So don't let them get to you!!!

[Larry1]

And do inform yourself about keyboard romeos before you start. It's a real plague! So try not to commit to anyone you haven't met, cuz tons of men will write until the end of times and keep promising to visit, and never actually do.

Aloe gave excellent advice above.  Many people who keep track of the international dating world have arrived at a consensus that only about 5% of guys who post profiles on the sites and correspond with girls ever visit at all.  This search is seldom easy either for guys or girls. 

[Muzh]

Katerina, i don't know how experienced you are in online dating, but when you do register on all those sites, don't let your spirits drop when you get messages from 60 year olds  
It can't hurt to keep a profile up on all those sites, just have to take them with a dose of cynicism
And do inform yourself about keyboard romeos before you start. It's a real plague! So try not to commit to anyone you haven't met, cuz tons of men will write until the end of times about the wonderful marriage they see with you and keep promising to visit, and never actually do it. So don't let them get to you!!!

One way to reduce the occurrence of this by writing in bold letters that old goats and perverts will be totally ignored somewhere in your intro.

[BillyB]

Many people who keep track of the international dating world have arrived at a consensus that only about 5% of guys who post profiles on the sites and correspond with girls ever visit at all.

Let's lower those odds. Out of 5%, a few percent aren't marriage material. Out of marriage material guys, not all will be compatible with Katerina in personality or with their life goals.


Most men 20-25 yo don't have the finances for international romance, wisdom to do the paperwork, or desire to marry. Most men 25-30 are new to their careers, busy, may not have time for international romance and prefer to stay at home to look for a wife. Katerina's odds of finding a husband within her age range is reduced further.


Insincere women get visited by more men on average than sincere women. They are not as choosy as sincere women. These women are also experienced in the art of how to attract men so Katerina may lose out to her good and bad competition. Her odds of finding the ideal man becomes smaller due to her competition.


Many men who write her may not be serious and waste her time. Some men will be rude and write nasty letters. It's easy for a woman to change her attitude and tone with men. If Katerina stops being cheerful and positive in her communications with men because she views every man with suspicions, she may lose good men as they would rather look for a woman who has a positive attitude.


How can you improve your odds Katerina? Go to the link ML provided and sign up at as many international sites as possible. Increasing the amount of men writing to you increases your chances of finding what you're looking for. Always keep a positive attitude throughout this whole process. You many not find a guy you want to meet this year but you many have 5 good ones wanting to see you the next year.

[Muzh]

That and the fact that attractive successful young men generally don't have to go overseas to find attractive young women to date Some Older men though they say otherwise go overseas to date and marry the women they can't find at home...

I had to do a little fixing there.

You're 

[Vasilisa]

Would you mind reminding me any? 


Ive been to America for 3 summers while I was a student - fall in love with the country but was too busy with work to actually look for someone to date. Since im about to graduate, i feel like its time to create a family, and I would like to have that family in the country I like. 

Good luck, but remember that tourism and migration are different things, like in the old anecdote.

[Kokopelli]

I agree to that and if Kokopelli wants to marry an American man 20-30 yo, she may be waiting a long time and it may never happen. If the ages of the men in this endeavor are represented by the men in this forum, then there are very few men between the ages of 20-30 looking for a foreign wife. When I was 20-30, I wouldn't never think about looking overseas for a wife. Most every American man are going to have their first marriage with an American woman or at least with a foreign woman living in America.

Who? Me? 

[Kokopelli]

It doesnt but i made an account there two weeks before leaving the states last summer ))

That's why they are leaving skids marks. Post your location in your profile. If you say too quickly you want to live in America some may think you are willing to take the first ship (offer).