Meeting in the Caribbean

[JayH]

No Visa required. Buying package in Ukraine makes it affordable!!

[chip]

Different people have different level of adventurism in 'em.       But I'd definitely ask that girl in advance if she'd like this kind of first meeting or not.   

I am not springing this trip on her after I get to Kiev. How would that even work? Wouldn't I have had to tell her to bring a bathing suit and some sundresses? Re-read my original post. It's not what I said.

[TomT]

I am not springing this trip on her after I get to Kiev.

That's good because the last time that you surprised someone it didn't work out very well. Travel plans ought to be made together. If you want to surprise her, buy some flowers.

[Donhollio]

I know the Maldives is a favorite destination for Ukrainians.  Any idea what the visa situation is for them?

Did you click on that link I gave here on the first page?  It covers every country, and what the visa requirement is for the country you are interested in.

[southernX]

I am not springing this trip on her after I get to Kiev. How would that even work? Wouldn't I have had to tell her to bring a bathing suit and some sundresses? Re-read my original post. It's not what I said.

chip

take this anyway you want ,    BUT IT IS MEANT IN GOOD TERMS

 as a suggestion how about being less sensitive and defensive in your responses , not all posters are having a go mate

your reading stuff into responses that arent  there quite often 

AND if it is there , your hitting the bait harder than any great white 

you have posted , the ''dont lecture me i know what im doing line ''

ok well if you did really have all the answers you would not be asking for info like you are

so having said that , how about taking a step back a bit and as mendy said ask with and read responses with a  more receptive attitude to the info your being given as a whole

GENERALLY people are happy to help , and offer their perspective from experience gained ,
you will continue to alienate many , while your defensive etc etc

1 take on board all that  is offered, it is a public forum &YOU ARE ASKING 
2 read it all , , gems might come from posters you dont possibly like 
3 consider it , does it have merit ? FOR YOU ?
4 keep/use what is valuable , FOR YOU !!!
5 discard what seems unsuitable or just ''not for you ''
6 consider not all info/responses  in a thread , even one you started is aimed at you !! often for example i try to aim my reply to the wider audience who may come along and read the thread

SX

[chip]

That's good because the last time that you surprised someone it didn't work out very well. Travel plans ought to be made together. If you want to surprise her, buy some flowers.

Hey Tom, I'm pretty sure you're not even in the same timezone as "civil" with your posts. Where I come from, making fun of a guy's misfortunes in love is pretty low. I'll just chalk it up to getting to know you.

[Ooooops]

Re-read my original post. It's not what I said.

All you said was "spare me a lecture".   Mine was a very short one, so it doesn't count.   

[2tallbill]

Hey Tom, I'm petty sure you're not even in the same timezone as "civil" with your posts. Where I come from, making fun of a guy's misfortunes in love is pretty low. I'll just chalk it up to getting to know you.

Chip, Tom and I have argued in the past. He has also given me some excellent
advice when I really needed it. Read all of Tom's posts because sometimes
(often in my case) he says something that is pure gold. 


My advice is to read everything that is posted. Use what advice you think fits
your situation, your personality and your situation and ignore the rest. Don't
take anything said here personally. Grow a little bit thicker skin and don't
worry so much about the small stuff.


Udachi !


Bill

[Daveman]

...  Sounds like Chip wants fun and sun. 

Ah HA! A likely story... don't buy into it... here's the REAL scoop:

.. Wouldn't I have had to tell her to bring a bathing suit and some sundresses?

It's the ole nefarious Plan A Warm Trip to See Her In a Bikini trick... I knew it all along.

[LAman]

I am going there in January and I will be renting a car. Its a modern city.  The airport is also getting better. Actually as long as you do not have a connecting flight....its pretty good.

As far as the winters go...to me it is no problem. Just  some snow and colder. Nothing to worry about.

I think last winter was pretty snowy!!!!! Just some snow and colder??? hmmmmm

[Patagonie]

He says that he knows what he's doing Pat, although he doesn't but who cares? He wants to spend money to fly a girl who he's never met to a foreign country for a honeymoon vacation and if the honeymoon goes well in his mind then he'll proceed to file paperwork to bring her to the USA without having to get his feet dirty in the FSU.

Now we learn that the gal doesn't know that the man she's never met it has told her they'll meet in Kyiv but on arrival he's ready (or so he thinks) to whisk her off to a foreign location of which neither she or her family is aware. Flippin' brilliant. NOT.

He knows what he's doing, or so he says so it begs the question as to whether he is aware that most FSU folk leave the foreign passport at home as it is rarely needed. The internal passport is what she'll use to purchase train tickets, etc, in her travel across Ukraine.


Well, she certainly isn't under the assumption that you are going to downgrade hers. However, Pat's point is that you should be able to observe her in her natural environment.


You don't want lectures, but since you asked the question, YES.

Kyiv one of the most beautiful FSU cities in winter. Unless you are a wuss from some warm weather place, yes you should go there in winter.


So you arrange for a Caribbean island first date. Do that for every gal you date or just the one's you've never met?

She'll learn a LOT about your ability to provide from that trip. The expectations you'll set are so high that the second date, the third date, and the short span of married life will never top the first date. You see that as romantic. She will see that as a bait and switch and when her divorce lawyers drain the remaining balance of your bank accounts you'll be on the scammer forums screaming about how you were the one who was misled.

Perfect post, very nicely written.

To the OP : not meeting her in her city and you let her playing also the local boyfriend if she has one.
Also, not knowing and not having a relationship with this woman and she would have no problem for any reason to walk away at any time, and let you with your tickets, your booking and your vacation like a jerk. It happens to me twice and i had met them, one was even really interested in me.

[Patagonie]

Kiev is still the primary option. I just have heard nothing but bad things about winters there. Thought it would be fun to explore other possibilities. And, if I'm going to spend a week somewhere in winter, I would personally enjoy a beach. I'm sure she would also. Trying to impress her is not the deal, but romantic surroundings will go a long way in setting the right mood.

I'm getting some great info and I appreciate it.

Excuse me to disturb a little.
But you need to know that tourism and finding a partner is two different activities, or you have two or three months free and you are retired like few guys who succeed on this forum.

[lonedrake]

Just some snow and colder??? hmmmmm

 You have a point. I grew up and live in Minnesota. Its 25 degrees and snowing out right now.

[TomT]

Hey Tom, I'm pretty sure you're not even in the same timezone as "civil" with your posts. Where I come from, making fun of a guy's misfortunes in love is pretty low. I'll just chalk it up to getting to know you.

Inviting the media can't compensate for a deficiency; neither can a vacation in an tropical location. If it turns out that there are no deficiencies and everything goes swimmingly, the exotic locations will still be there for your honeymoon. For now, K'yiv or Krim are reasonable options for a place to meet although, personally, I would have chosen her hometown.

[LAman]

 You have a point. I grew up and live in Minnesota. Its 25 degrees and snowing out right now.

I grew up in LA..... 80+ all week....if I'm not skiing with the bunnies, when would I torcher myself and freeze my 'gadonias' off. My Cali tanned skin does not take kindly to 'unmild' winters!!! 
 
I don't understand the 'advising' of where to meet a girl. It's okay to say what you would do/not do but to tell someone else what they should do???? Just sayin
 

[GQBlues]

Yeah, well, what I don't understand is why is everyone seem to be keeping up with all the 'lecturing' BS when that was CLEARLY stated in our hero's first post not to do. Maybe these silly lecturing posts need to be moderated too since we seem to be keenly observing certain sensitivities these days, no?

C'mon fellas, keep up with the program. Just give him what he wants from you and be done with the lecturing crappolas. He wants the gal to fly halfway around the world so she can romance him all in a week's time. Simple enough.

I realize certain folks had put up with hero's ways for 30 days, and while some of you have had it in less than a week, doesn't mean you can't follow simple instruction. So, to be clear (as Obama would always say), he wasn't asking you guys, he was TELLING you guys.

[chip]

Chip, you were the one who wrote:
"And she is not aware of this plan. She thinks we'll meet in Kiev."

The fact is that my statement does not convey the meaning you attributed to it. I gave you that information to let you know she is not a vacation whore. She thinks we're meeting in Kiev. That is the current plan. I am exploring alternatives in the meantime and if I come up with a good one, I will of course talk with her about it.

With regard to WHEN I was going to tell her, the statement is ambiguous. Frankly I never thought to spell that out as I thought that was obvious. You chose to interpret it in a way that made me look stupid and gave a condescending answer to my post, referring to me in the third person, yukking it up with your Heros about this ignorant newbie.

This is why I said, "assume I know what I'm doing." To head off those of you who just can't help yourself from ASSUMING naivite and writing a condescending comment. If you all could just stick to the subject, this thread will be very informative.

[GQBlues]

I agree with you hero! These guys just can't seem to grasp such a simple command. Sheeesh...

Then to make it worst, they try to make things so much more difficult for you to pacify your needs.

Don't worry good buddy....we're here for your support and entertainment, OK?

[TomT]

I agree with you hero! These guys just can't seem to grasp such a simple command. Sheeesh...

Then to make it worst, they try to make things so much more difficult for you to pacify your needs.

Don't worry good buddy....we're here for your support and entertainment, OK?

"Validation"

[Shadow]

The fact is that my statement does not convey the meaning you attributed to it. I gave you that information to let you know she is not a vacation whore. She thinks we're meeting in Kiev. That is the current plan. I am exploring alternatives in the meantime and if I come up with a good one, I will of course talk with her about it.

With regard to WHEN I was going to tell her, the statement is ambiguous. Frankly I never thought to spell that out as I thought that was obvious. You chose to interpret it in a way that made me look stupid and gave a condescending answer to my post, referring to me in the third person, yukking it up with your Heros about this ignorant newbie.

This is why I said, "assume I know what I'm doing." To head off those of you who just can't help yourself from ASSUMING naivite and writing a condescending comment. If you all could just stick to the subject, this thread will be very informative.

She is not from Kiev but decides it is better to meet you there as in her home town.
Does being a vacation whore start when you cross the border?

[ML]

She is not from Kiev but decides it is better to meet you there as in her home town.
Does being a vacation whore start when you cross the border?

Nothing to do with the attacks  on Chip, but . . .

Many people here attribute a lot of significance to the 'border' idea.

i.e.  If someone travels from Vladivostok to Moscow and happens to have sex; that is OK.

But if someone travels from Budapest to Kyiv and happens to have sex; then they are scum bag sex tourists.

And, I suppose, when China takes over everything up to Ural mountains, then the Vladivostok to Moscow excursions will also have a change of designation.

[flitabout62]

Went to Punta Cana, DR in beginning of May as the 5th - engagement trip. Beautiful water, all inclusive system, reasonable prices, just great.  You'll get a nice tan, but probably won't learn much about your friend during this trip... as you'll have nothing to compare things too.  In our case, we learned a lot about each other and overall it was beneficial. 
Good luck and enjoy where ever you go... 

Except, pass on the trip to Syria.   
-flit

[CanadaMan]

Nothing to do with the attacks  on Chip, but . . .

Many people here attribute a lot of significance to the 'border' idea.

i.e.  If someone travels from Vladivostok to Moscow and happens to have sex; that is OK.

But if someone travels from Budapest to Kyiv and happens to have sex; then they are scum bag sex tourists.

And, I suppose, when China takes over everything up to Ural mountains, then the Vladivostok to Moscow excursions will also have a change of designation.

I know what you are trying to say, but you are mixing up concepts here:
'border', sex tourist, man, woman.

"i.e.  If someone travels from Vladivostok to Moscow and happens to have sex; that is OK."

That would be a woman traveling that route 99.9% of the time.
By default she can't be considered a 'sex tourist'.

"But if someone travels from Budapest to Kyiv and happens to have sex; then they are scum bag sex tourists."

That would be a man traveling that route 99.9% of the time.
He may or may not be considered a 'sex tourist'.

"And, I suppose, when China takes over everything up to Ural mountains, then the Vladivostok to Moscow excursions will also have a change of designation."

That would be a woman traveling that route 99.9% of the time.
This time, moving across a border would enter into the picture.

Being a woman, she still wouldn't be considered a 'sex tourist'.

Now if we introduce a Kiev to DR trip or Moscow to DR trip, then we have a border situation for both the man and woman.

The woman, by default, would not be considered a sex tourist (should sex occur).
The man, may or may not be considered a sex tourist (should sex occur) depending on your personal bias.

[lonedrake]

I don't understand the 'advising' of where to meet a girl. It's okay to say what you would do/not do but to tell someone else what they should do???? Just sayin
 

 Its just my opinion. Others have said the same...and you may also be referring to them. I am just a redneck living in Minnesota....so take it for what it worth

 Trust me...on my first trip to the FSU I was very nervous....but the snow and cold were the least of my worries.

 

[LAman]

 Its just my opinion. Others have said the same...and you may also be referring to them. I am just a redneck living in Minnesota....so take it for what it worth

 Trust me...on my first trip to the FSU I was very nervous....but the snow and cold were the least of my worries.

Sorry LD.....it was just a general response...
I didn't know rednecks ventured that far north...mostly see them in da south...Ar-kansaw way