Divorce finally final after 3 years and 3 different lawyers for her.

[GregfromGa]

It was a battle in every sense of the word. Totally unreasonable in every facet of the process. She took every turn and violated every order the judge handed down in regards to our kids. She ended up pregnant by a loser on disability from his 3 month duty in the beloved Corp a year ago. Had the guy ever been deployed or actually made it through basic I would garner much more respect for the little prick. They were married 3 days after the divorce was final. I have zero doubts it not end well. Her mom is arriving for her 6 month stay when the baby arrives. I'm an idiot for actually feeling a bit sorry for her. She was absolutely poisoned by her frequent visits to Russian women talk forums. In her 10 years here she basically has no friends. She constant doubting,jealousy and drawing of comparisons to others made friendship impossible. I totally watched a sweet, innocent, funny girl slowly become her mother after our kids were born. Last night was my first night back in our old home. Luckily I spent it with my kids. She vacated this place and started to rent a place not nearly as nice. I guess her  latest atty told her the judge would frown on the whole preggers out of wedlock thing who knows. This is the only home my kids have ever known. I would be a fool to move as it is paid for. My kids are doing well throughout all this. Ii think my G7 has social issues, but I'm no doctor. My B4 is like me. He knows no strangers. Getting them involved in extra activities such as sports will be a battle with her.
Would I ever embark on this journey again. I doubt it. I thought I had it all figured out and there's no doubt in my years here that I gave out some great free advice. LOL, there is no doubt too that I rubbed some the wrong way. Divorce was very humbling. I have no regrets in the way I lived my life prior to our separation. She was never going to accept the fat that it wasn't normal to spend 6 months a year in the house with a wolverine mother-in-law and that I had some say in how our kids were going to be raised and that ice cream doesn't make kids sick because it's cold. I've dated some. Not Russian or Ukrainian. I'm not ruling it out. My kids are half that. They both speak Russian. Where is the forum for Russian women here that are divorced and have come to realize that maybe they might have needed to adapt a little?  I might could go for one that has been humbled a bit. LOL, maybe

[tfcrew]

  They were married 3 days after the divorce was final. I have zero doubts it not end well. 

Agreed.
Messes usually end up messy.

[ML]

Greg, thanks for reporting back.

Hope you life will improve and continue to improve.

[GQBlues]

Greg-
 
I hope the kids are taking your current situation well enough, man. I can't help but detect some lingering hurt in your post and understandably so. Tough deal, especially when kids are involved.
 
Anyway, just wanna remind you, if nothing else, she'll forever be the mother of your kids, she'll forever be the one that mothered your kids, and she's also going to forever be the one who gave & shared the best and prime time of her life to you. Things just didn't work out in the end.
 
So for everyone's sake, yours as well...forward and be happy.
 
 

[TS]

Back in 2005 you posted on how happy your MIL got a visa for the USA.  Life changes when moving to a foreign country.
Do you think the issue was more that you found your wife waiting at a train station and not pursuing someone ready for a life in a foreign country?
I lived all around the World and majority of women never want to move away from their friends and family.  The ones that think they do in many cases end up being miserable after moving. They end up comparing their men to other men.  Regarding the MIL she must not be married anymore if she visits 6 months a year?
You got two wonderful children so I wish you well in your future.  Sometimes in bad circumstances good comes from it.
 
 
Or was this the women who compares her man
 
 

[LiveFromUkraine]

Greg, glad to hear you got through it.


It will still take some time to get over everything.  Now that the divorce is final, you can start moving on.  My divorce should have been a quick one.  Even the judge said it should be.  Unfortunately, she dragged it out over a year and also broke rules along the way. 


Don't feel sorry for her, she is an adult and can make her own decisions.


I will shoot you a call when I get my butt down to Georgia and buy the first couple of rounds. 

[mendeleyev]

Greg, best wishes for you and for the kids. It is tougher when children are involved but you can make it.

I struggled with MIL issues for awhile at the beginning and eventually we became the best of friends but it took some adjustments on both our parts. The good news is now the other guy gets to experience your MIL. 

For you however, let it be and let it go. Concentrate on being a Dad the best as circumstances will allow. Life for you will return.
 

[TomT]

It's nice hearing from you, Greg. There certainly has been a lot of water over the dam since we first met in Independence Square.


I recall your writing, a few years back, that you don't know shit. The fact is that none of us do... except some of the newbies. I'm glad that you are socializing again; you were not a happy camper the last time that we spoke. One of the characteristics of FSU women that is absent from the hype is their talent for kicking the living crap out of a man.


Don't be a stranger.

[GregfromGa]

Back in 2005 you posted on how happy your MIL got a visa for the USA.  Life changes when moving to a foreign country.
Do you think the issue was more that you found your wife waiting at a train station and not pursuing someone ready for a life in a foreign country?
I lived all around the World and majority of women never want to move away from their friends and family.  The ones that think they do in many cases end up being miserable after moving. They end up comparing their men to other men.  Regarding the MIL she must not be married anymore if she visits 6 months a year?
You got two wonderful children so I wish you well in your future.  Sometimes in bad circumstances good comes from it.
 
 
Or was this the women who compares her man

I was very happy when she got her Visa to come visit. We made it a couple of days and the wheels came off. She spent half of our marriage living in our home barking all day every day. I absolutely loved my father-in-law. She removed his spine many years ago. He is a good humble man. I'm over this. I really really enjoy my kids these days. That's something that was impossible while I was married. I'm good. I really am.

[lordtiberius]

Divorce theft?

Yout situation seems very unjust morally and legally.  Why does the husband have to continue to pay after the divorce?  Not one state in the union has iy right.  What an oxymoron: "family law."  Sympathy and prayers

[pokerintherear]

One of the characteristics of FSU women that is absent from the hype is their talent for kicking the living crap out of a man.

Only in western countries where the divorce courts remove the balls from the man. I highly doubt the divorce would have been the same in her home country. She wouldn't kick the crap out of anything if not enabled.

[Ade]

Greg-
 
I hope the kids are taking your current situation well enough, man. I can't help but detect some lingering hurt in your post and understandably so. Tough deal, especially when kids are involved.
 
Anyway, just wanna remind you, if nothing else, she'll forever be the mother of your kids, she'll forever be the one that mothered your kids, and she's also going to forever be the one who gave & shared the best and prime time of her life to you. Things just didn't work out in the end.
 
So for everyone's sake, yours as well...forward and be happy.

I'd bet that she'll also forever be the one with her side of the story. And it's a rare divorce indeed where only one partner is to blame for the breakdown of the relationship. 

I hope your kids really are doing well Greg.
 

[Slumba]

Only in western countries where the divorce courts remove the balls from the man. I highly doubt the divorce would have been the same in her home country. She wouldn't kick the crap out of anything if not enabled.

There are plenty of real life anecdotes to go along with the statistics that show this. 

In countries where the woman does not gain anything materially from the divorce, women are far less likely to file for divorce.

In the USA about 65% to 75% (depends on whose stats you use) of the divorces are filed by the woman.

[lordtiberius]

I'd bet that she'll also forever be the one with her side of the story. And it's a rare divorce indeed where only one partner is to blame for the breakdown of the relationship. 

I hope your kids really are doing well Greg.

such Christian compassion . . . would that all of aped this postmodern enlightenment

[Ade]

such Christian compassion . . . would that all of aped this postmodern enlightenment

I'm no Christian but do you even understand how big a hypocrite you are?

[lordtiberius]

I'm no Christian but do you even understand how big a hypocrite you are?

I have never denied my hipocrisy.  But then again, I don't kick a man when he is down.  I guess even hipocrits have class.

[TomT]

I like hippos and agree that they have class, especially when they flatulate through their mouths. Although this has plenty to do with you, it has nothing to do with Greg so there is no need for you to stink up his thread.

[Chicagoguy]

Well, now your ex is free to get on the Russian chat sites with her side of the story and brag about her new found happiness.

[Gator]

HI Greg,
 
You have been unhappy for a long time.  Now that you have been returned to single life, you can progress past this episode.  This will become a distant memory as soon as you let go of your animosity.   
You have the gift of two beautiful kids,  Enjoy being their father as they grow up.  They need you, they want you.

[GregfromGa]

HI Greg,
 
You have been unhappy for a long time.  Now that you have been returned to single life, you can progress past this episode.  This will become a distant memory as soon as you let go of your animosity.   
You have the gift of two beautiful kids,  Enjoy being their father as they grow up.  They need you, they want you.

Gator my friend I am elated this is finally behind me. I'm back in my house. I have good visitation with my kids. My mom says I'm getting better looking the older I get so there's that. My bills get paid. My travel has been sidelined somewhat the past couple years but I have a ticket I won to anywhere in the world I want to go. Italy was so nice a couple of years ago. As a coordinator for my exchange student program my options are endless. I still tell friends about LaTerisita where you took us that night. I've been 3 times since we went there. LOL, great food. It was a good evening friend.

[BillyB]

I totally watched a sweet, innocent, funny girl slowly become her mother after our kids were born.

She may not have changed as much as you thought. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
 
 

She was absolutely poisoned by her frequent visits to Russian women talk forums.

 
Garbage in, garbage out. Don't blame those forums. Your ex chose to read crap. If a guy comes to this forum and read divorce stories and scams, he may get paranoid and turned off. If a guy reads happy stories, he may get motivated to proceed to find a RW.
 
 

She was never going to accept the fat that it wasn't normal to spend 6 months a year in the house with a wolverine mother-in-law and that I had some say in how our kids were going to be raised and that ice cream doesn't make kids sick because it's cold.

 
As soon as your wife was being influenced by forums and bad MIL, you should have taken action. My MIL is living in my house right now visiting for almost 6 months. I pay attention to her behavior. Is she standing out of the way, causing marital problems or encouraging a healthy relationship between me and my wife? So far she's encouraging a healthy relationship but if she didn't, she'd have to move out ASAP.
 
 
Whatever bad happened to cause the divorce didn't happen overnight. Unhealthy behavior, neglect and a lack of willingness to solve problems contributed to the divorce. All that built up over time. Think about what improvements you could make for the next lady you get involved with. If you are one to sit on the computer every night failing to give attention and family time to your wife, she will begin to neglect you in return. Once everybody starts neglecting each other the marriage deteriorates. You being the man must take the first step to corrective action. Get rid of the MIL, tell your wife get off the computer and go for a walk in the park after a nice dinner out. If you indeed married a sweet, innocent, funny girl as you believe, as her husband you are greatly responsible in keeping her the way she is.

[JayH]

BillyB--   I am guessing you live on the planet " they lived happily foreverafter" !!
The world changes,people change,relationships change -- the parameters of those changes may be acceptable  and in this case-it is clear they were not-it happens.
 The marriage in the first place may be in "the good idea at the time" category-- along with  ?% of American marriages . Life would be a lot easier if we were all clairvoyant!!

[GregfromGa]

BillyB, good luck with you and yours. You have little clue about mine. You might move your M-I-L out or you might not. It's been a while since I was here. I almost forgot you are the foremost authority on all things Russian Women. Again good luck with you and yours.

[lordtiberius]

I have a question.  Is there any truth to the saying, how you get her is how you keep her?  Thank you to all thoughtful responses in advance.

[BillyB]

 

people change,

 
I've been saying that on another forum before I joined this forum. With that knowledge people can solve problems before allowing them to grow. If a man starts to look at porn or hires prostitutes as a source to satisfy his lust and his wife catches him, she may sit down and talk with him that that behavior is harming the marriage. His reasoning for his change of behavior could be that the wife stopped trying to look good, being sexy, and horrible at sex. At that moment the wife can take corrective measures to help her husband alter his behavior or one or both parties can say "screw you", let the marriage deteriorate and eventually end.
 
 
Although people change, in the end after change is complete, when comparing mother-daughter, father-son, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree is still true in most cases.
 
 

BillyB, good luck with you and yours.

Thank you but I'm going try to do this without luck.