Russian Cook/Cleaner/Housewife and anything else Western women don't like

[Boethius]

The simple reality is, that someone has to do it... so why NOT the woman?

I don't get it - if the guy washes the car, changes the oil, mows the lawn, cleans out the gutters in the autumn (when the leaves fall and they clog it up), is he supposed to now complain and ask the woman to climb up the ladder with him?

The reason things got segmented into "man's job" and "woman's job" is not due to chauvinism - it is due to specialization!  Steveboy, thought you were smarter than that ...

It is why a person who runs a bakery does not also run an auto mechanic's shop! 

It's an attitude about demand and expectation.

My former next door neighbour worked in a very high stress profession.  He worked on schedules, so his hours varied dramatically.  His crazy (literally, she ended up committed a number of years after their divorce) wife did not work.  She was also in a lot of ways, superwoman.  She painted the house indoors and out, did most of  the cooking and cleaning (he barbecued), mowed the lawn, shovelled the snow, designed their garden, cleaned the pool, and the gutters.   He did a lot with his kids, more than she did.  But, their division of labour did not make their marriage happier.

[Shadow]

Shadow, RW are not stay-at-home moms but they are used to work AND do most of house work. It is back in Russia.
Once they are here and understand how things are in this country- then forget it
Only few of us will stay at home for years without our own money and job. It is very insecure. So, RW will work and they will SHARE chores with their husbands.
Trust me, RW (FSUW) can be very determined to do it. By "determined" I actually mean "really stubborn".
AW will seem to be just little angels (contrasted to RW)

Don't forget that I have a speciment here.
And she just asked me to get her a new fying machine
Not the one with the jet engine but the type to clean the garden.

[Flashback]

And what makes you think that bringing Snow White to this squalor is going to make her happy? Ever thought about that?
 
Or are you planning on keeping her incomunicado?

You're right, but where I live isn't ugly, just the people.

Flashback - your profile says you live in Tucson. Is so, I am there on a regular basis and I don't see it that way.

If you don't live here, then no you wouldn't see it. The "old pueblo" is a gateway city for the illegals and drugs that populate the rest of the country. Its all in the shadows. But this place is horrible! And the people that populate it are the same.

[Konfushus]

Why do so many men think FSUW are 'more traditional'?

Simply because in general Russian men and women do follow 'traditional' roles. Men do most of the heavy lifting, mechanical tasks around the house and women do most of the cooking, cleaning and caring for children.

It has nothing to do with having a job or not. As noted above, most Russian women work. Excluding the 'stay at home' aspect, it's easy to meet Russian women that accustomed to, even insist on these more 'traditional roles'.

Why do so many men think FSUW 'have family values'?

In general - you have two, three, even four, generations of adults living under one roof more often than in the US. It gives the impression of closer families.

Why do so many men think FSUW 'like to raise family'?

Related to the above. Also consider the women actually looking for a husband overseas, not the ones pretending. Many are single or divorced mothers. Many are usually looking for a better situation for their child as a priority.

The real answer to all of the above?
It's what agencies sell. It's what women tell.

From my experience I can't disagree too much. Not all Russian women fit the 'traditional' 'family values' description, but enough do that they are easy to find. Just don't expect them all to want to 'sit home'.

[Ooooops]

  His crazy (literally, she ended up committed a number of years after their divorce) wife did not work.  She was also in a lot of ways, superwoman.

What did she do to be dragged away in a straight jacket after all of those achievements? 

[Boethius]

She was bipolar.   The better half thought she was mentally ill when we first met her, and he never changed that opinion. 

She was retraining in a profession, and attacked her mentor for no reason.  She was assessed in a mental institution at that time for a few days before being released to her parents' care.  Within a few weeks, she attacked her mother, injuring her mother quite badly.  She stole her mother's car, and then located her ex and attacked him.  He did not resist, but their kids witnessed it, and the oldest daughter, then in her twenties and living on her own, called the police.  She was locked up for years.  Sometimes, we see her driving on the freeway, so she must be out, if not permanently, then from time to time.  I am surprised she has a licence, as she looks fairly out of it when she is driving.

[Ooooops]

Oh, I see.   That's terrible.   But then again, none of the "geniuses" were exactly normal either.   

[Boethius]

Yes, that's true for many of them.

In retrospect, I suspect she was manic during a lot of the time she lived next door.  She never showed signs of depression.  That would explain her super energy, and ability to get so much done.  I don't know about her cooking, but everything that I saw, the yard work, the design, the home decorating, were impeccable.  She also used to run around in a bikini in the summer, and would invite another neighbour, whose wife is an alcoholic, over to "swim".  She and her husband socialized with them, so I don't know what her hubby knew.  We just assumed, at the time, that they must be swingers, but now, I don't think so. 

I do know that she instigated the divorce, he was just waiting for their youngest to be off in school before flying the coop.  I also know that she refused to take medication until she was hospitalized. 

He remarried once his kids were all in university.  He lived in the neighbourhood (roughly, it's a subdivision of about 30,000) and we would run into him at times in the grocery store.  When he retired, he moved to a warmer climate.

The next couple that moved in were newly married, in their twenties.  He was a great guy, used to play street hockey with the kids.  Her parents would visit from out of province, and when that happened, he was usually unhappy, out shovelling everyone's walks, or mowing lawns.  My better half used to tease him about his the in laws visiting, and he would grumble.  They had two girls under 2 when they separated for a while.  He moved to the next province (British Columbia), and she, being a Saskatchewan farm girl, would avoid us.  I think she was embarrassed.  She sold the house.

I ended up working on a file on which his new boss was on the other side.  The boss is known across the country.  I asked the boss, during a one on one call, how the neighbour was doing, and they apparently had reconciled, which is good news.

The couple living there now have been there more than 5 years.  They had the most adorable toddler, a chubby curly headed blonde boy, now about 7, and twins.  So far, so good, so the curse of the house next door hopefully has been broken.

[Ooooops]

In retrospect, I suspect she was manic during a lot of the time she lived next door.  She never showed signs of depression.  That would explain her super energy, and ability to get so much done.  I don't know about her cooking, but everything that I saw, the yard work, the design, the home decorating, were impeccable. 

Oh yeah, that is the definite sign of a nut case!   

[Ooooops]

[size=78%]So far, so good, so the curse of the house next door hopefully has been broken.[/size]

Have you seen this - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0410975/


I love it!   

[Boethius]

Oh yeah, that is the definite sign of a nut case!   

 

Honestly, had it not been for the eventual meltdown, I would have just assumed she was superwoman.  The better half always told me he could tell she was crazy from her eyes.  He said it the first time we met them.

No, I never watched Desperate Housewives.  I watch Mad Men and The Big Bang Theory, the latter if I can catch it, and I started watching The Mentalist and caught up to this season.  Hubby and I watch the last two together, he won't watch Mad Men.  I like it, plus, Jon Hamm is easy on the eyes (as is Simon Baker).

[Ooooops]

No, I never watched Desperate Housewives.

Try it, you won't regret (I think    ).   It is very twisted and disturbed in a white picket fence sense, as my better half puts it.   


Is Mentalist good?  Because I'm looking for some new series to get hooked on.       And I do love Big Bang!!!   

[Boethius]

OK, I'll try it online.  I usually only watch when something is on the telly.


Yes, The Mentalist is good, although it lost its way a bit last season.  They are finishing a major story arc next week, so if you can watch all of them before then, that would be good.


If you don't watch Mad Men, try it, too.  It is very good, and my mother says that it is accurate, from a time period perspective.


My kids watched Breaking Bad and Community, and said both are excellent, but they conflicted with my schedule.

[Ooooops]

If you don't watch Mad Men, try it, too.  It is very good, and my mother says that it is accurate, from a time period perspective.

Nah.  It has no connection with me.  I'd rather watch Golden Girls - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088526/   

[Елена]

I sometimes wonder what people think of Russian women. Those women who were born in Russia, they did not come from outer space. Yes, we do cook, clean, raise children. Someone does not it? All women do so to a greater or lesser extent. Someone has to do it? you can not live in filth and starve. But do not think that Russian women for domestic work is her dream. Domestic work is not the most interesting thing in life to do. Homework is just a necessity. And so it is necessary to treat this. If someone thinks that Russian woman free cook, cleaner and governess - you are wrong. Of course, there are women who do not want to work in a factory or office. Then these women want to develop their hobby. Russian women are often a good education - and they want to be implemented. But if a woman has no education, has no hobbies and sees his life as a cleaner and a cook - it can also be. You have to understand what kind of woman you want. I think that the main feature of Russian women is not what we are doing homework, and the fact that we are loyal and tolerant of our husbands. And much to forgive them. We suffer a lot and sacrifice. But this should not be seen as something that will never end. Should not be abused. About Russia say they are in no hurry harness, but go fast. And it's about women. There is one caveat. As a rule, work at home, that men do (hammer nails, wearing cement bags) may be delayed, if the man was very tired at work. Homework women (cooking, ironing shirts, laundry, feed the baby) can not be delayed, even if the woman came after work in the factory or in the hospital. Therefore, all women are counting on help from men. You ready for this.?

[mendeleyev]

Elena, for the most part I agree.

I travel frequently but when home I end up doing much of the cooking and some light housekeeping and laundry as Mrs. M works by contract and when she has a painting to complete, I don't see any need to expect her to drop her paint brushes and come fix my dinner and pour my beer (I rarely drink anyway). 

Mum lives in the same home so sometimes there are 3 of us in the kitchen, sometimes 2, sometimes just one of us. Mum does a lot of the cleaning but each of us pitch in. All 3 of us have work responsibilities and we just try to cover the bases for each other. That is a big change for Mother because when we were first married Mother would throw a fit if I even looked at a broom or tried to do some laundry. Later I introduced the concept of children doing chores around the house and that was new to her as well. I won, and she now sees the value in what it taught the children.

[BlondeSeeker]

Why do so many men seeking FSUW always think these women are "More traditional" "Like to raise the family" "Have family values" ?

Its all B***** really !! Maybe twenty years ago, but as the new generation grow up, who are more interested in a career and making money and don't want to sit at home all day. How will the next lot of FSUW wife hunters manage? It will defeat the object bringing back a women to your own country, only for her to want to get straight into some career and if she's smart and fluent in several languages , she may even land up earning more than you.

Its going to defeat the object for many guys??

Depends which rock you look under... They are there if you go to remote places. Some want to do it AND have a career... now that is 2 things the American girl that works at Starbucks doesn't understand...

[Daveman]

Depends which rock you look under... They are there if you go to remote places. Some want to do it AND have a career... now that is 2 things the American girl that works at Starbucks doesn't understand...

Hey now, I like the ladies at Starbucks.. 

[BlondeSeeker]

Hey now, I like the ladies at Starbucks.. 

I don't want spit in my coffee so I should retract that? ha ha... meant

USA: be smart, fit and good job but BTW I work at Starbucks, am overweight and no degree
Russia: treat me good and lets have a family but BTW I'm fit, have a degree and I have a decent job that I would leave for the right man

[steveboy]

I don't want spit in my coffee so I should retract that? ha ha... meant

USA: be smart, fit and good job but BTW I work at Starbucks, am overweight and no degree
Russia: treat me good and lets have a family but BTW I'm fit, have a degree and I have a decent job that I would leave for the right man

Another deluded person!

[mies]

The way I view it. I might as well go for broke. I live in a city where the women are ugly, and the ones that might be acceptable are usually criminals or with bad criminal histories. I make a living hiking mountains and I simply am not exposed to attractive, family valued women, etc etc etc. The fact is, for some like me, we don't really have options. I've just finished dating 4 AW's, and they are flunked my standards test. Between massive tattoos (unattractive) overweight, uneducated, lazy, dumb, and no family values, or simply having waaaay too many children for me to have to deal with, they're simply... a bunch of losers. Oh, and one of the biggest killers here is that they think they're extremely special and want to be treated like Donald Trump's girlfriend. Don't measure up to their expectations, and there's another 10 losers waiting in line to suck-up to them. So, if I make great money, can treat my woman as she deserves, am faithful, want children, and yes I think I'm a great guy, I think its a good trade for a FSUW

Make great money hiking mountains?  Define "great money."
Otherwise: you need to look for women in villages, ideally in Russia. Ukrainian village women traditionally have different relationship dynamics with men. Bring a Russian village woman to USA, make sure she eats healthy (or otherwise she'll gain weight soon), and you'll get yourself a keeper. Plus a village woman is often considered an old maid relatively early in her 20s, so you can make some girl very happy and get yourself a very sweet deal.

[mies]

Why do so many men seeking FSUW always think these women are "More traditional" "Like to raise the family" "Have family values" ?

Its all B***** really !! Maybe twenty years ago, but as the new generation grow up, who are more interested in a career and making money and don't want to sit at home all day. How will the next lot of FSUW wife hunters manage? It will defeat the object bringing back a women to your own country, only for her to want to get straight into some career and if she's smart and fluent in several languages , she may even land up earning more than you.

Its going to defeat the object for many guys??

In cities - yes.
In many villages both in Russia and Ukraine people still live in conditions where the toilet is a hole in the ground behind the house (with some wooden structure over it, for privacy), there is no running water (all water is brought from the water well (sometimes not even on their own property, so they have to walk with 2x3.5 gallons buckets of water for 0.5 mile or so), cooking is made on gas stove and gas is purchased in cylinders, coal and timber are used for heating the house during cold winters, women wake up at 4-5am to tend to cows and poultry and cook dinner for the family, before they will go to their main workplace (as a school teacher, or a doctor, or a nurse in local hospital) and go to bed at 10-11pm after the day of non-stop work, and so on. So for these women high-profile career is not necessarily on the top of their priorities list, and cooking and cleaning and raising children is their way of life. I'm sure they will see improvement in their lifestyle enjoying the benefits of civilization US and Flashback can offer them.

[mies]

You're right, but where I live isn't ugly, just the people.

If you don't live here, then no you wouldn't see it. The "old pueblo" is a gateway city for the illegals and drugs that populate the rest of the country. Its all in the shadows. But this place is horrible! And the people that populate it are the same.

I lived in Tucson for some time. I honestly have no idea what are you talking about when you say that women are ugly there. Huge lie and misrepresentation. There is a huge university, with PLENTY of women working there, studying there, and you have to look really hard to find an ugly face among them. It's like California or Cancun during a springbreak - everyone is beautiful and fit and healthy and with great tan and blonde.

[steveboy]

In cities - yes.
In many villages both in Russia and Ukraine people still live in conditions where the toilet is a hole in the ground behind the house (with some wooden structure over it, for privacy), there is no running water (all water is brought from the water well (sometimes not even on their own property, so they have to walk with 2x3.5 gallons buckets of water for 0.5 mile or so), cooking is made on gas stove and gas is purchased in cylinders, coal and timber are used for heating the house during cold winters, women wake up at 4-5am to tend to cows and poultry and cook dinner for the family, before they will go to their main workplace (as a school teacher, or a doctor, or a nurse in local hospital) and go to bed at 10-11pm after the day of non-stop work, and so on. So for these women high-profile career is not necessarily on the top of their priorities list, and cooking and cleaning and raising children is their way of life. I'm sure they will see improvement in their lifestyle enjoying the benefits of civilization US and Flashback can offer them.

You should try visiting some of the housing estates in the UK, not to much difference from many Ukrainian village houses! Come to think about it try looking at some of the villages down south in the US!

[mies]

Depends which rock you look under... They are there if you go to remote places. Some want to do it AND have a career... now that is 2 things the American girl that works at Starbucks doesn't understand...

Another one seeking a beautiful submissive slave.