Back to Dating: Experience in USA

[I/O]

I am 41 years old.  I am really fat.  But it is not that hard to connect with Western Women who are 15 years younger or more for romantic purposes

Most 41 Y/O's who are 'really fat' are flat out getting their toes wet in the shower, much less 'connecting' with anyone romantically.....

[lordtiberius]

Its not hard if you have a personality. 

[lonedrake]

Summer is over here and I decided to get back into dating.  Thought I would describe my luck for the last week.

I met one girl online, met for a drink and some live music.  Wound up seeing her baby daddy while we were there.  Went to two different bars after with him tagging along.  She had 4 shots with him.  We ran into her ex boyfriend.  He got into a fight with her and with the girl he was with.  Wound up with police at the bar.  On the way back to the cars her ex boyfriend showed up again.  He threatened me, chased her fighting and arguing the entire way back to her car.  Evening ended with her getting a dui.

Second lady and I took my puppy for a nice long walk along a trail.  3 days later she disappeared for the weekend and comes back to say she needs to learn how to love herself better before she gets into a relationship.  Spent the weekend alone at a friends camp crying about how bad her life is. 

I so love dating in the area.  I love the people that keep telling me what wonderful ladies are available.  I especially love the ones that tell me to stop looking and one will show up.  Lets see I didn't look from late June into late August and surprisingly while I wasn't looking.... I did not go on a single date.

In the meantime I have kept in touch with a couple of online friends from Ukraine.  One lives in Donetsk, she is happy, goes to work, and posts pictures of the building next door with windows blown out from the fighting.  Another in Kaliningrad goes about her daily life, enjoying friends and family. 

Pretty sure I will be getting back online and looking for a woman in the FSU.

 Two years ago I had yet to go to the FSU.  After reading this thread I went on POF to look at the women who were in my area. I searched within 50 miles of my zip code. I did a range from 36-50. I saw quite a few of the same profiles…still looking for a "good" or "honest" man. 50% of the women I would consider obese. Another 25-30% overweight. I don't mind a woman who has a few extra pounds. I like them more than the rail thins ones. Anyways I looked at about 100 profiles. Many had 3-4 kids. One decent looking one had five. Some of the thinner ones were covered in tattoos and give me the sense that they are drugs users.

 I would have tried to contact 5-6 of them if I was still looking. It may have resulted in one date, based on my previous experience.

Anyways, my point is that I am so happy I decided to go to Ukraine. My wife has been here for over a month and I keep wondering…when does the difficult part start? As a complete package she is better than all of the women I saw today on POF….by a wide margin.At this point, it is the best decision I ever made.

 

 I say go for it. If you have 1,000.00 disposable income per month, that will be enough allow you to start making plans.

[AC]

 Two years ago I had yet to go to the FSU.  After reading this thread I went on POF to look at the women who were in my area. I searched within 50 miles of my zip code. I did a range from 36-50. I saw quite a few of the same profiles…still looking for a "good" or "honest" man. 50% of the women I would consider obese. Another 25-30% overweight. I don't mind a woman who has a few extra pounds. I like them more than the rail thins ones. Anyways I looked at about 100 profiles. Many had 3-4 kids. One decent looking one had five. Some of the thinner ones were covered in tattoos and give me the sense that they are drugs users.

Walking around the mall this evening in an affluent area I would say that approximately 75-90% of the American women were overweight and quite a few of those were obese.  And I'm not talking about older women, I'm talking about younger women.  Go to a poor area and you will see even more obesity.  That's the thing about the FSU, because of genetics many of the women are slender and more beautiful to begin with. 

More importantly the average poor young woman in the FSU or the ones with income, all walk all over the place.  They probably walk as much in one day as the average woman in America does in two weeks.  I see a lot of slender guys who settle for overweight girlfriends.  Pretty sad to me.  I just think they've never had the chance to see something better or different. 

Now somebody will come along and tell us more about "statistics".  You don't need to read about that.  Just walk around and observe with your own eyes.  I wonder, where do they keep this alleged equal number of slender beautiful women -- somewhere on a catwalk for Victoria's Secret?

[RoboCop]

 Two years ago I had yet to go to the FSU.  After reading this thread I went on POF to look at the women who were in my area. I searched within 50 miles of my zip code. I did a range from 36-50. I saw quite a few of the same profiles…still looking for a "good" or "honest" man. 50% of the women I would consider obese. Another 25-30% overweight. I don't mind a woman who has a few extra pounds. I like them more than the rail thins ones. Anyways I looked at about 100 profiles. Many had 3-4 kids. One decent looking one had five. Some of the thinner ones were covered in tattoos and give me the sense that they are drugs users.

 I would have tried to contact 5-6 of them if I was still looking. It may have resulted in one date, based on my previous experience.

Anyways, my point is that I am so happy I decided to go to Ukraine. My wife has been here for over a month and I keep wondering…when does the difficult part start? As a complete package she is better than all of the women I saw today on POF….by a wide margin.At this point, it is the best decision I ever made.

 

 I say go for it. If you have 1,000.00 disposable income per month, that will be enough allow you to start making plans.

Bravo! Bravo! And just in case I didn't stress it enough, BRAVO! Being a guy at a healthy weight, I also noticed the same issue amongst American girls, namely, them being predominantly overweight. The sad thing is that if I wanted a girl who isn't fat and with the same figure as my wife, I'd probably have to hit on girls at my local college volleyball team.

Bravo!

[pitbull]

Walking around the mall this evening in an affluent area I would say that approximately 75-90% of the American women were overweight and quite a few of those were obese.  And I'm not talking about older women, I'm talking about younger women.  Go to a poor area and you will see even more obesity.  That's the thing about the FSU, because of genetics many of the women are slender and more beautiful to begin with. 

More importantly the average poor young woman in the FSU or the ones with income, all walk all over the place.  They probably walk as much in one day as the average woman in America does in two weeks.  I see a lot of slender guys who settle for overweight girlfriends.  Pretty sad to me.  I just think they've never had the chance to see something better or different. 

Now somebody will come along and tell us more about "statistics".  You don't need to read about that.  Just walk around and observe with your own eyes.  I wonder, where do they keep this alleged equal number of slender beautiful women -- somewhere on a catwalk for Victoria's Secret?

Well, statistics don't lie. The proportions of overweight/obese women and men is the same in all age groups. You might consider any woman who weighs above 100 lbs overweight and/or obese, but it has nothing to do with  reality.
Where I live in the US, 90% of women are slim and attractive and of healthy weight, everyone runs and goes to the gym. Most couples are well matched in terms of attractiveness and age.
Truly, "everyone lives in their own USA"
 

[jone]

Where I live now, there are beautiful people, galore.  (Sometimes I think that having an attractive figure is obsessed over.)  I, of course, am the lone exception.  Don't know why people put up with me.  I expect to see an eviction notice any day.

But where I grew up, in Wisconsin, the amount of fried food and dairy products, in particular cheese, has a telling effect.  You may grow up a slim and attractive child.  But when you exit your 20s and hit your 30s, chances are you will  have a significant body makeover. 

I've noticed that people in Wisconsin carry 30 - 40 pounds more, on average, than they do California.  It should also be pointed out that I have seen a similar makeover in people from Eastern Europe.  The difference is that this makeover occurs, usually around the end of their 40s. 

I have a friend of mine from Suzdal, in Russia.  He claims that a Russian woman goes through three phases:  Childhood, adulthood and Babushka.  When she hits the babushka phase, she puts on around 40 or 50 pounds.  While this is not a universal truth, I have observed it personally with friends that I have known over 10-20 years in Russia.

[Pkeel1]

The only reason I think Pitbull is incorrect is not that there aren't fit women it is in the attitude.  I was on the bus with the lady in Lviv and she was very unkind about a large man on the bus.  The attitude here is very different.

Here in the USA we fight to have women be more accepted for being overweight.  Of course 2/3 of people in the USA are overweight, 1/3 are considered obese, but we are constantly told to be more accepting of large women.  One of the most popular of the songs this summer was a woman singing about how proud she was of her size.  "All about that bass".

On the dating sites in the USA, men outnumber women by a large number.  I think plenty of fish is 7 or 8 to 1, but they all have more men than women.  The more attractive women are simply inundated with messages.  So yes the women have a much greater number of men to choose from and it definitely gives them an attitude about what is acceptable.

[pitbull]

The only reason I think Pitbull is incorrect is not that there aren't fit women it is in the attitude. I was on the bus with the lady in Lviv and she was very unkind about a large man on the bus.  The attitude here is very different.

Yes, people in FSU are very unkind about overweight people, as well as disabled, gay, and people of other races, especially blacks. And generally about anyone considered "not normal"


The newcomers on the forums for FSU women abroad always comment on how many disabled people are there in the US and why don't they just sit at home or are locked up in special hospitals like in FSU, instead of insulting the "normal people's" aesthetic feelings in public.

[pitbull]

Here in the USA we fight to have women be more accepted for being overweight.  Of course 2/3 of people in the USA are overweight, 1/3 are considered obese, but we are constantly told to be more accepting of large women.  One of the most popular of the songs this summer was a woman singing about how proud she was of her size.  "All about that bass".

As I said, BOTH men and women are equally overweight/obese in the US. It simply won't work to accept obesity in men but not in women. Fit people find fit partners no problem - at least where I live.


I see that song as promoting normal, average as healthy, instead of stick thin "model" image. A very good one for young girls. The singer is not overweight, she is an attractive normal healthy woman.

[AC]

Well, statistics don't lie. The proportions of overweight/obese women and men is the same in all age groups. You might consider any woman who weighs above 100 lbs overweight and/or obese, but it has nothing to do with  reality.

No.  I look for HWP up to 140 lbs depending on height. 

[Pkeel1]

Keep in mind that  we also had Maria Kang post a photo of herself with three children and ask "what is your excuse" get banned from facebook for her insensitivity.

The USA is working hard to normalize being overweight and out of shape.

Meaghan Trainor is part of the problem not the solution.  It isn't that we should ostracize overweight people, but we certainly should not celebrate it.

[lordtiberius]

People love her music.  And men still have sex with obese women and likewise.

[ML]

I wonder, where do they keep this alleged equal number of slender beautiful women -- somewhere on a catwalk for Victoria's Secret?

Hi AC,

Here is where they are.  Go to central office area of any large city.  Go to the most expensive office buildings.  Seek out the corporate headquarters, law offices, investment banking offices, etc.

These places are filled with beautiful, educated, slender women.  They are every bit as fantastic looking as any you will find in FSU.  But they dress professionally rather than looking like prostitutes as the FSU gals do to catch your eye, so you have to take more than just a quick glance.

You won't see them on the street anywhere.  They drive into the underground parking lots.  They don't walk in the malls because they go directly to Neiman Marcus, etc.

At night they go to the most expensive restaurants and night clubs or to private parties.  They are not at public beaches, but rather at private, fenced off beaches.

With respect to me, they smile beautiful smiles when I am in the office and will gladly attend social functions with me in a strictly platonic relationship.  But the ones as young as I need for sex are not about to participate on a long term basis as they have their eyes on younger studs for marriage.  Yes, an occasional romp with me when emotions running high after a big deal is closed, etc., but nothing serious.

There are older ones of course also.  But most are in solid marriages, and they aren't good sex partners anyway as their desire is gone.

[notforone]

Its not hard if you have a personality.

Your pipe dreaming LOL you have to be fit to play and that's the minimum

Two years ago I had yet to go to the FSU.  After reading this thread I went on POF to look at the women who were in my area. I searched within 50 miles of my zip code. I did a range from 36-50. I saw quite a few of the same profiles…still looking for a "good" or "honest" man. 50% of the women I would consider obese. Another 25-30% overweight. I don't mind a woman who has a few extra pounds. I like them more than the rail thins ones. Anyways I looked at about 100 profiles. Many had 3-4 kids. One decent looking one had five. Some of the thinner ones were covered in tattoos and give me the sense that they are drugs users.

I would have tried to contact 5-6 of them if I was still looking. It may have resulted in one date, based on my previous experience.

Anyways, my point is that I am so happy I decided to go to Ukraine. My wife has been here for over a month and I keep wondering…when does the difficult part start? As a complete package she is better than all of the women I saw today on POF….by a wide margin.At this point, it is the best decision I ever made.

I say go for it. If you have 1,000.00 disposable income per month, that will be enough allow you to start making plans.

Same old story about the fat, ugly AWs with the many kids. So, what if she has kids? Divorced soccer moms are perfect! They require little to no effort on my part and they're busy with the kids during the week so they leave me alone to pursue my other interests. The question is not whether she has kids, the real question is: is she bangable?

Walking around the mall this evening in an affluent area I would say that approximately 75-90% of the American women were overweight and quite a few of those were obese.  And I'm not talking about older women, I'm talking about younger women.  Go to a poor area and you will see even more obesity.  That's the thing about the FSU, because of genetics many of the women are slender and more beautiful to begin with. 

More importantly the average poor young woman in the FSU or the ones with income, all walk all over the place.  They probably walk as much in one day as the average woman in America does in two weeks.  I see a lot of slender guys who settle for overweight girlfriends.  Pretty sad to me.  I just think they've never had the chance to see something better or different. 

Now somebody will come along and tell us more about "statistics".  You don't need to read about that.  Just walk around and observe with your own eyes.  I wonder, where do they keep this alleged equal number of slender beautiful women -- somewhere on a catwalk for Victoria's Secret?

The upscale places where I go are filled with gorgeous, classy, well-to-do women. FSU women don't age well as someone else pointed. One more reason to look for real young over there, then hope for the best./

[lordtiberius]

Its really not that hard.  My old roommate in Hollywood had movie star good looks but no personality.  I got laid more than he did by chics half my age.  But whatever, good luck in your search.

[jone]

Its really not that hard.  My old roommate in Hollywood had movie star good looks but no personality.  I got laid more than he did by chics half my age.  But whatever, good luck in your search.

Was this when you were thirty?  (Sorry, that just slipped out.)

[AC]

Keep in mind that  we also had Maria Kang post a photo of herself with three children and ask "what is your excuse" get banned from facebook for her insensitivity.

The USA is working hard to normalize being overweight and out of shape.

It's already pretty normal.  Maria Kang getting banned from facebook is your proof.

Popular shows like "The Biggest Loser" show what an epidemic obesity is in this country. 

I suspect "growth hormones" being used in our food supply for decades might be a factor. 

Most of the food over there is organic and the portions are smaller. 

[Muzh]

It's already pretty normal.  Maria Kang getting banned from facebook is your proof.

Popular shows like "The Biggest Loser" show what an epidemic obesity is in this country. 

I suspect "growth hormones" being used in our food supply for decades might be a factor. 

Most of the food over there is organic and the portions are smaller.

Ay ay ay


The main reasons are high fructose corn syrup, the car, and American exceptionalism.


As in "You want fries with that?" as our butts grow bigger and bigger waiting in the drive thru.


BTW AC, if you don't know biochemistry, please refrain from saying stuff like that.

[Muzh]

Hi AC,

Here is where they are.  Go to central office area of any large city.  Go to the most expensive office buildings.  Seek out the corporate headquarters, law offices, investment banking offices, etc.

These places are filled with beautiful, educated, slender women.  They are every bit as fantastic looking as any you will find in FSU.  But they dress professionally rather than looking like prostitutes as the FSU gals do to catch your eye, so you have to take more than just a quick glance.

You won't see them on the street anywhere.  They drive into the underground parking lots.  They don't walk in the malls because they go directly to Neiman Marcus, etc.

At night they go to the most expensive restaurants and night clubs or to private parties.  They are not at public beaches, but rather at private, fenced off beaches.

With respect to me, they smile beautiful smiles when I am in the office and will gladly attend social functions with me in a strictly platonic relationship.  But the ones as young as I need for sex are not about to participate on a long term basis as they have their eyes on younger studs for marriage.  Yes, an occasional romp with me when emotions running high after a big deal is closed, etc., but nothing serious.

There are older ones of course also.  But most are in solid marriages, and they aren't good sex partners anyway as their desire is gone.

You are asking the man to venture away from his comfort zone. 

[lordtiberius]

Was this when you were thirty?  (Sorry, that just slipped out.)

The mask is off.

[Gylden]

Its really not that hard.  My old roommate in Hollywood had movie star good looks but no personality.  I got laid more than he did by chics half my age.  But whatever, good luck in your search.

Now that is some upstanding christian behavior!
 

[AC]

Hi AC,

Here is where they are.  Go to central office area of any large city.  Go to the most expensive office buildings.  Seek out the corporate headquarters, law offices, investment banking offices, etc.

These places are filled with beautiful, educated, slender women.  They are every bit as fantastic looking as any you will find in FSU.  But they dress professionally rather than looking like prostitutes as the FSU gals do to catch your eye, so you have to take more than just a quick glance.

You won't see them on the street anywhere.  They drive into the underground parking lots.  They don't walk in the malls because they go directly to Neiman Marcus, etc.

Very good summary, thanks for sharing.  Over there not so many young women own cars so you see plenty of slender ones walking about. 

[AC]

Its really not that hard.  My old roommate in Hollywood had movie star good looks but no personality.  I got laid more than he did by chics half my age.  But whatever, good luck in your search.

Why didn't any of those adventures make you want to marry one of those gals?  What was different between them and the lady you married?  Something must have been drastically different to make you want to travel thousands of miles to a totally different country.

[lordtiberius]

Now that is some upstanding christian behavior!

Well, it takes one to know one.

He did have great abs though, but contrary to popular belief,  I find their unsolicited invitation for tactile and visual inspection makes for a poor conversation piece.

Have fun!