Is this a scammer?

[Faux Pas]

Can someone tell me more as to what I need to do or find out about the ex-husband.  If I wanted to bring them both over, do I need his consent?

Nothing. You haven't even met this lady. Your cart is currently well before a horse that doesn't even exist yet. You are stuck in a mindset that you've found your puppy and and ready to bring it home. She is not a puppy and you are not bringing her home. At least not at this juncture.

Go meet her. This is your first and only priority. Planning a life with her and bringing her child into your warped mindset shouldn't even be a consideration at this stage. Go meet her. Confirm that there is a mutual respect and genuine like of each other. Gauge the chemistry and determine if you feel the same way then that you do now.

Her child shouldn't even be a consideration for you right now. You have no real relationship with a text buddy to bring a child into. Skipping the courtship or attempting to will lead you down a path of doom. The choice is yours

[krimster2]

RWO,

have you considered what the effects are of squeezin an object the size of a large chicken
down a woman’s vaginal canal?
hint: it DOESN'T return to its original SIZE!! (unless you do vaginal reconstruction!!)

So, if you have a “pencil dick” (I ain't sayin you do, just sayin IF you do), then when “you stick it in”
you ain’t gonna be touchin nothin but air…
as opposed to being gripped by a strong farm girl’s contracting vaginal muscles
that feels like it wants to arm wrestle your willy

ok?

course none of the “experts” are gonna “clue you” about this
but imagine, the first time you have sex with her, and THIS is what you experience!!!

me, I’d have a “backup plan” for sex, also most likely birth control will be condoms over there!!
so, if I were you I’d get an HPV vaccine

I’d doubt very much that she’s had very many sex partners, other than ex-husband
so I would’t worry needlessly over the list of STDs

[ML]

hint: it DOESN'T return to its original SIZE!! (unless you do vaginal reconstruction!!)

Totally false.

Under your logic, our butt holes would not return to original size after a large poo poo session.

I have had sex with several women who had two children, and several women who had zero children.

No noticeable difference.

I am not pencil sized, but claim nothing more than average.

[BC]

Totally false.

I'll second this.

[krimster2]

well, you're BOTH what I like to call "wrong"

http://www.glamour.com/story/vagina-after-baby

...You'll have a (slightly) wider vagina.
VERY understated....

[ML]

OK, then you must have a hugely wide butt hole by now.

I don't.

[krimster2]

"butt hole" would ONLY be a problem if you "passed" something out of your rectum, the size of a large chicken
do that, and afterwards you can keep your wallet up there with plenty of room to spare!

In order to have proper input towards making your claim of “no difference”
you need to have had sex with the SAME WOMAN, before she had her first child, as well as after
and not comparing two separate women, one with no births, vrs another woman with one or more births

that’s some REALLY sloppy data gathering there….

But, dear gentle readers,
imagine, but for a moment, that this DOCUMENTED phenomena (just google it)
actually DOES HAPPEN to the OP!!!

imagine, the shock, the horror, and then when his willy retreats like a frightened baby turtle back to its shell…
the embarrassment!!!

Meester MBA,

your acquisition cost for your proposed merger
will have a very negative impact on “operating costs”
my estimation of the lowest level cost of raising a child is maybe $10,000-$20,000/yr
times 8 years
what about college, car, etc?

And what value does he add to the deal?
Do you know what your legal liability is in terms what’d it cost you each month in support
just her
vrs her and HER child
if she divorces you

what do you think this EXTRA cost and risk is buying YOU?
WHY, are you willing to agree to such a BAD DEAL

is THIS the only DEAL anyone has offered you?
And so you’re starting to freak out, that you ACTUALLY MIGHT get some pooty-tang??
and you don't wanna blow your ONE big chance at finally gettin some...??

cuz, that's what it's startin to look like to me...

[Trenchcoat]

Can someone tell me more as to what I need to do or find out about the ex-husband.  If I wanted to bring them both over, do I need his consent?

I don't know anymore than has been said on that one but there can be a big economic advantage in the Father suddenly emerging out of the woodwork. Other posters in the past here have said that the Father often wants 'paying off' in order to give his consent to allow the child out of the country - that means You! Lol. Yep, it means they'll all expect you to pay of the guy and nice big wad of money for him to sign the consent form to allow the child out of the country. That as you can imagine is one of the reasons a lot of western guys in the know on that just avoid FSW with kids altogether it can be time consuming, expensive, aggravation, stress and ordeal at its worst. Even if it seems all a smooth affair at outset it can change overnight. The odd few guys have had a smooth enough ride given the likelihood of it not likely being so but most I think suffer. On top of that there is no telling if it's all just a scam, you pay Father a load of money and later on it all falls apart and she was in league with husband all along.

So yeah I wouldn't get carried away at the moment, if you do meet her think of her as one woman to meet of many potential candidates as it's best to set aside sentiment with FSW I think.

[BC]

well, you're BOTH what I like to call "wrong"

http://www.glamour.com/story/vagina-after-baby

...You'll have a (slightly) wider vagina.
VERY understated....

Ahh caught by the headlines again..

Things can also feel looser down there post-childbirth, but it tends to gradually go back to normal. If, however, you have a very large baby (or have had many babies), it might not go back to exactly the way it was before. The telltale indicator is tampons: If you insert a regular tampon and it ends up sliding out over time, that can be a sign that your vagina is ever so slightly wider than it was prebirth.

So, if you have a “pencil dick” (I ain't sayin you do, just sayin IF you do), then when “you stick it in”
you ain’t gonna be touchin nothin but air.

The old phrase "takes one to know one" comes to mind.  Not having had any difficulties with this, I bow to your experience.

[krimster2]

Are you kiddin me?
My willy is SO BIG, that it graduated a year ahead of me in high school…

[Jumper1]

Nothing. You haven't even met this lady. Your cart is currently well before a horse that doesn't even exist yet. You are stuck in a mindset that you've found your puppy and and ready to bring it home. She is not a puppy and you are not bringing her home. At least not at this juncture.

Go meet her. This is your first and only priority. Planning a life with her and bringing her child into your warped mindset shouldn't even be a consideration at this stage. Go meet her. Confirm that there is a mutual respect and genuine like of each other. Gauge the chemistry and determine if you feel the same way then that you do now.

Her child shouldn't even be a consideration for you right now. You have no real relationship with a text buddy to bring a child into. Skipping the courtship or attempting to will lead you down a path of doom. The choice is yours

X1000

[2tallbill]

Can someone tell me more as to what I need to do or find out about the ex-husband.  If I wanted to bring them both over, do I need his consent?

There are 7,197 steps to this process that must happen for you to live happily ever
after with a FSUW and you are currently on step #8, but worrying about step #1102.
I wouldn't worry too much before you travel to the FSU and everything goes swimmingly
during your visit (step #27).

A child can't leave the FSU (or the USA) without consent of both parents.

[RussianWomenOnly]

How would I know or how can this woman proof to me that the husband consents?  What if they cannot find the husband? 

[Trenchcoat]

How would I know or how can this woman proof to me that the husband consents?  What if they cannot find the husband?

Once the smell of money is in the air it's unlikely you'll have trouble finding the Father likelihood he will find you. Some guys over there are such poor Father's that it's music to their ears that sone dude is going to pay thousands upon thousands of pounds/euros/dollars to them. He may even want to hold out for more if he thinks you're good for it. Others quite likely know more on this than me here but it's the gist of it all. All asking for a lot of trouble which I wouldn't want over someone else's kid. I would as Krim suggests see what else there is around and not get too attached to this woman. Meet if you must but keep sentiment to one side and don't get emotionally invested in her in my opinion, keep a level headband think with a practical mind.

[2tallbill]

How would I know or how can this woman proof to me that the husband consents?  What if they cannot find the husband?

She doesn't prove it to you. If you meet her and everything goes well, then you
start trusting her. She has to prove it at the airport, they won't let her on a plane
with a minor child without a notarized letter from her father.

What happens if the father is dead, disappeared or in hiding? Then she has
to go to court. It takes time, money and energy. There is nothing for you to do
at this time.

Get on a plane romance the girl, win her heart, and plan a second trip to see
her and then start guiding the relationship along to the next step. Don't start
setting up accounts for your Grandchildren's college education just yet.

[krimster2]

forget about her ex-husband....
he'll owe SO much back pay for child support that he'll wanna keep hiding
or she takes him to court and they take it from him...
so VERY unlikely he'll ever be in touch with her or the kid
that's how it works there

he ain't interested in her or the kid...
he can't EXTORT from you without taking his own hit over years of  back child support
you gotta hire an "advocat" who knows how to "walk your child travel documents" through the beaurocracy
and along the way, you/she have to hand out "presents" to the various officials
otherwise your docs stay in the bottom of the pile for a LONG time

been there, done it 100 times at least
for example, I had to donate the cash equivalent of 200 liters of gas to the local fire department, in exchange for signing off on each of my real estate deals
that they were properly inspected...

THIS IS the world you're stepping into
it has its own rules, its own logic

that you know NOTHING about...

[ML]

What if they cannot find the husband?

You hire the Pinkerton agency.

Or Rockford; or Magnum;  or Cagney and Lacey, etc., etc.

Maybe Miss Marple or Hercule Poirot .

Best of all; find some ex SEALS.

[ML]

Was talking with my Ukrainian wife about this at breakfast out this morning.

She has galfriends in Ukraine who had experience with missing ex-husbands.

She told that in Ukraine, when ex pays child support, it is entered into some official record each month.

So if ex hasn't been paying, then mother only needs to go to court to show this non-payment; and then asks to get order giving 100% custodial rights to her.

With this paper, she can then take children out of country without signature of ex.

- - - - - - -

Now a second situation would be if ex has been keeping up to date with child support and it has been recorded.

Then, his signature would be required.  That's when the issue of bribes to him would possibly occur.

But wife also knows of cases where the ex is happy to let the child leave for a better future in another country; and so signs without bribes.

[ML]

There are 7,197 steps to this process that must happen for you to live happily ever after with a FSUW and you are currently on step #8, but worrying about step #1102.
I wouldn't worry too much before you travel to the FSU and everything goes swimmingly during your visit (step #27).

Big Bill, you have written previous posts that my comments would better follow after; but since I am too lazy to find them, I will answer here.

I disagree with the idea of just going to FSU to meet the desired gal (or gals) without first worrying (considering) details about children, ex spouses, etc.

There is a great deal of vacation time, effort and money involved in 'just going.'

I wouldn't advise 'just going' and worrying about details and consequences later . . .

when a little investigation (in terms of gentle questions to the gal), could reveal . . .

** she has no intention of ever leaving her country;
** her ex (who is up to date with support payments) will never agree to
            let children leave;
**she is terminally ill with ???
**her father, who doesn't want her to leave, is honcho of a Mafia group.
**or perhaps she is even related to Putler.

[Trenchcoat]

I agree with you ML, it's better for a guy to have a bit of an idea as to the culture he'll find and a bit of knowledge of the society before going. Otherwise the guy is going to be totally in her hands and that's not going to look good. As we know the guy is expected to lead out there and so her having to walk him through it all probably isn't going to look great for him. Overall going over there and existing in a fog of not understanding anything isn't likely to help whatever the situation.

I already have great reservations over whether RWO might have already muffed it up too much with his prattling on about being friends to her then his emotional moment. Possibly it may be recoverable but is that because she is only leading him on?

I kind of fear RWO is already trapped in her spell and it might end up RWO facing a ruinous financial situation in the future with her running of with green card and child to enjoy a life in the US leaving him having shelled out a fortune and a severe case of embarrassment.

[krimster2]

I’ve only done K-1 visas for single individuals with no children
they each had to have in addition to medical exam with x-ray and blood test
background report from local police dept
legal document saying they can legally be married
(does this woman have an OFFICIAL divorce decree?)

if a kid is part of the equation, then you will also need this custodial rights document WHEN you submit your K-1 visa
if you are doing this on your own and not through an immigration attorney
you will have to have a professional translator and Notary make an English copy
instead of them doin EVERYTHING for you
and just kick back and take all the credit, like I do!!
you get an FSU person an American Visa and then Green Card and then Citizenship...
they FOREVER in your debt...
sheeeeettt man...

[Patagonie]

Dear fellas, may I express my humble opinion?
 
In fact, if I had had enough communication with the lady.
And that's the great, great advantage to communicating with an FSU woman, you can go very directly and ask
very upfront questions, while western women will run away in two seconds.
   
The second advantage I see is simply: 
1/ you show that you are serious
2/ not afraid to be engaged
3/ you potentially take care of her children
4/ you show some corones by potentially taking control of the immigration process
All of this is ++++     
 
Of course, she knows and you know that all of this is just a game and you need to meet first, like dogs, to sniff each other and more before stepping into such a process... Everybody know.   
 
Therefore, I would say something:
Irina, may I ask you an important question? 
DA
"I would to know, if in the future you relocate to the USA, if the father of your boy (girl) will be ok to let his child leave?What do you think about this?"
I would WRITE it to have a written answer because most of the time part of the communication is lost and it's damned important that
you retrieve the best possible answer and not lost a piece of it. 
 
I am, today, personally, not afraid to dig and dig into serious topics like children for example until I have a clear idea of what goes on.To give you an example last time on Tinder a woman wanted a man with serious family values and so on. She was 45 I think and she wanted me to play this stupid game. Why a stupid game, let me explain.
I asked her how many children she has, no answer, I asked if she wanted some children, no real answer. And finally, she faded away...She was in hurry to have a child and she wanted one but she was too old to advertise it explicitly but at the same time, she wanted to have some "guarantees" about ?????? about her secret project, but you don't really know it from the scratch (that's the surprise!) 

[Patagonie]

Depending on the answer, if I had the feeling that there are already big problems because of the child, I can guarantee you that I
will drop her and find another one. 100% 
One time I was on travel with a lady in Italy, we knew each other for already 10 days, and I got very important information about her child thatsimply showed me that we had no future.
That happened in the evening. The next morning I left her and caught a train for Roma to return to Ukraine ASAP.
I had to wait 24 hours to find a flight but finally succeed to return to Ukraine (I was in Ukraine 7 days before, this is where I met the first lady).

[krimster2]

I got very important information about her child thatsimply showed me that we had no future.

le garçon retardé?
a lot of these kids will have MAJOR behavioral problems, yet still have to make major behavioral adjustments
just think what changing schools mean!!!

my children went both to Russian and USA schools and had two separate transitions
but I was able to spend a LOT of time with them
particularly with daily reading exercises
which made them highly successful in school
but RWO won't have time for that
or any other type of fathering eaither

[Patagonie]

I got very important information about her child thatsimply showed me that we had no future.

le garçon retardé?
a lot of these kids will have MAJOR behavioral problems, yet still have to make major behavioral adjustments
just think what changing schools mean!!!

my children went both to Russian and USA schools and had two separate transitions
but I was able to spend a LOT of time with them
particularly with daily reading exercises
which made them highly successful in school
but RWO won't have time for that
or any other type of fathering eaither

 
You raise an interesting point garçon effronté which is:
   
Do FSU women monitor their children at school by:
- helping with lessons
- following marks
- uprising his cultural and intellectual perspective (going to the museum with his children, to the Sciences complex) 
i tak dale. 
 
Because my ex-wife didn't: NOL, zero despite having plenty of time.
 
Dear members, what have you witnessed?