Interesting situation

[Elen]

No I would not call a girl a back up plan. Those are the words of others around here. But I would not have a problem telling a lady that I had visited someone else before and we weren't compatible. I mean really, aren't these girls doing the same thing? Looking for a husband. I am sure they have dated other men or written other men in their life. It's not a big deal unless you make it one.

No . I didn't mean using exactly "back up plan" term but only a confession to a girl that you did meet her only after other plan didn't work ( from which she would get that she IS a "back up plan" ) Believe me or not but it would cause you troubles as well  and never mind what girl herself is doing at dating through interent scene We all have our double standarts for judging our own action and action of others , don't we 

PS BTW can you help with some advices what should girl to do if N "fiances" she wrote to in interent decided to meet her at the same time period ? Would you take it easy if you made a trip for thousands kms to be told that she can't spend the whole time with you because she should meet one more guy? 

PSS "You" is not some "personal"l but "in general"

[I/O]

So typical on internet forums where someone gets there feathers ruffled because someone disagrees with them. You gave your opinion, I gave mine. There was no need whatsoever for you to make it personal and tell me my idea was phuct.

Funkola If I was going to make it personal, I would have told you that YOU were phuct.  You are so right about people getting their feathers all fluffed up and that is exactly what YOU did when I disagreed with you.  So typical of people with no experience in this pursuit. Think about it.

BTW, I never said MY way was THE way, in fact I put forward the idea of the longest married to an FSU lady on this board right now.  Prior to listening to his thoughts, I would never have considered using an agent and I imagine I never will need to, but if I was starting this process, knowing what I know now, I would be just smart enough to see the sense in HIS idea and just smart enough to learn there is a better way to do it. 

The idea I attacked and will always do so is that a woman prepared to meet many or meet one who is meeting many is MORE mature.  It is a nonsense argument and there is no supporting evidence.  She might very well be less mature in the important areas, who knows? Thus I am not stupid enough to suggest she is more or less mature.  Go get a clue dude before getting your feathers all ruffled in future. And.......learn to read, it's a very good start when involving oneself in this process.

I/O

[funkola]

I/O what a great demonstration of maturity. Your snide remarks reveal much more about you than me. Think about it man.

Regardless, this is not even a FSU issue, and how many times you have been there are of no use in this question. It is about people and nothing more. If mir wants to see both women then he should show his integrity and shoot straight with them. If either of the ladies can't handle that info they are unrealistic and immature. All of your trips to Europe won't change that. So ditch the pompous attitude. 

[funkola]

How many trips has Funkola ever made to wherever? And were there any women involved?

I don't need to be a tourist to give my opinion on how to approach two girls in the same building.

[Mir]

Hey Fun do you know that the B-25 was the only US aircraft name after a person and was in service as late as 1979!

[Zhena]

I'm sorry I just reread your post and I see you have never been to the FSU. That explains your mindset on some of this. You have much to learn if you continue down this road.

Why? I think funkolas opinion has some sense.

[Zhena]

No . I didn't mean using exactly "back up plan" term but only a confession to a girl that you did meet her only after other plan didn't work ( from which she would get that she IS a "back up plan" ) Believe me or not but it would cause you troubles as well  and never mind what girl herself is doing at dating through interent scene We all have our double standarts for judging our own action and action of others , don't we 

PS BTW can you help with some advices what should girl to do if N "fiances" she wrote to in interent decided to meet her at the same time period ? Would you take it easy if you made a trip for thousands kms to be told that she can't spend the whole time with you because she should meet one more guy? 

PSS "You" is not some "personal"l but "in general"

Well,Elena,you re right,many women wouldnt like to hear shes not only one and forever...but not all of them. If a woman has a little brains,she understands that she might be not only one and a honesty is better here. To me better to hear this strightly than catch a man on the street with someone else. Other business that not every woman can accept shes not only one at this stage...well. You know,I heard alot of the men who are oversuspicious and jelaous on the stage of writing already-not even meeting-and blame a woman that she writes to many. Personally I would never deal with a such man.

[Voyageur]

I remember when I was head strong newbie. I thought that "people-are-people-the-world-over. How jaded are these forum old-timers are, every case is different.  Thanks for the advise but I'll try and do it my way."
 ??? - 

Now I am not a newbie and I learned many things the hard way, unnecessarily. There is much that can be learned by listening to those who have been there, have done it and have brought home the tee-shirt.

But that is just one man's opinion.

[I/O]

But that is just one man's opinion.

And.......that one man, is part of one group, mostly successful, who share the very same opinion.

Someone mentioned some threads ago that almost everything can be fixed apart from Daybreak and Stupid.  Personally, I suspect fixing Daybreak would be the easier of those two.  Stupid has to fix itself and usually doesn't.

"None trip dumbers" dispensing "How to in the FSU" advice are more stupid than they realise but of course ignorance is bliss as they say.

I/O

[Makkin]

Hello,

  I suppose all advice can help a person here if that person decides to believe what he reads. Some people choose to not believe what they read and hear and that's the option they have.
  I agree with I/O on many issues as he stands up to a lot of tests in regards to experience and actual time in country from my readings. He is good enough to relay his experiences here.

  Funkola,

  Hope you visit soon and have a wonderful time. Hope you find what you seek. I know that special person is waiting for you and you will be glad you went.

Makkin

[Kuna]

Funkola,

After my trip I see myself as having gone from "Newbie" to "Novice" and I still thnink there's much to learn from members here...

I think the most important thing is to have an open mind and use these forums to absorb as much info as possible BUT make few decisions before arriving.

While on my trip I remembered and referred to so many things I'd read on the board, but if my mind was fixed on a particular path my trip may have been very different.

I'm not saying there is only one way to do things... but we should be open to all possibilities and the Oldies here are obviously the best ones to learn from. (Sorry for calling you an "Oldie" I/O)...  heheheh   

Kuna

[funkola]

Hey Fun do you know that the B-25 was the only US aircraft name after a person and was in service as late as 1979!

I know about Billy Mitchell and the tough row he had to hoe. I was not aware it was in service until 1979.    May I  ask what it was being used for?

My dad was a B25 pilot and later a flight instructor. He did not see combat, thank god.

[Mir]

It was in service with Indonesian Air Force till 1979 presumably as a bomber.

[funkola]

Kuna I have no doubt I can learn much from many people here including I/O. But in this thread he is just being a pompous @ss and offering no evidence to support his phuct (i learned to like that word)    response other than to say he has been to FSU. Whippee! I/O went to FSU so therefore he is an expert on talking to two women in the same building. I am so unimpressed. 

When he displays some manners I will respond in kind. Until than he is just another keyboard commando like we all run into on Internet forums.

You will never see me initiate criticism of another mans opinions. But will I tolerate rudeness.

[funkola]

Why? I think funkolas opinion has some sense.

Thanks. I will make an assumption that you are more qualified to judge in this matter than any of us. I think mir will do what is best and only he knows what that really is since he has all of the info and we do not.

[funkola]

It was in service with Indonesian Air Force till 1979 presumably as a bomber.

Holy smoke. Talk about a sitting duck!!

[Elen]

Well,Elena,you re right,many women wouldn't like to hear shes not only one and forever...but not all of them. If a woman has a little brains,she understands that she might be not only one and a honesty is better here. To me better to hear this strightly than catch a man on the street with someone else. Other business that not every woman can accept shes not only one at this stage...well. You know,I heard alot of the men who are oversuspicious and jelaous on the stage of writing already-not even meeting-and blame a woman that she writes to many. Personally I would never deal with a such man.

 We were speaking about "back up  plans" () just a reminding)
  And I didn't say that ALL women would refuse to be those back up plans  There are  enough who would accept such a chance to meet foreigner fiance for sure.( because of various reasons) 
 
I would not want to give appraisal neither to their brains nor to their self- respect. That's a matter of personal choice. For me personally this game, where "write many visit many"- "dating many in the same time in order to make right choice", "back up plans" and all such things which would be rather "dishonest" for dating in reality  are acceptable and reasonable things is just  not an option  in principle matter.
 And not because it would be hard for me to accept such behaviour of a man ( though it would be hard) but first of all because I myself could not behave in such a way. And such a "lack of brains" would make me outsider in this game for sure 

[funkola]

Elen do you still consider it dishonest if the man/woman is open about what they are doing. (seeing many people)

[Mod2]

Kuna I have no doubt I can learn much from many people here including I/O. But in this thread he is just being a pompous @ss and offering no evidence to support his phuct (i learned to like that word)    response other than to say he has been to FSU. Whippee! I/O went to FSU so therefore he is an expert on talking to two women in the same building. I am so unimpressed. 

When he displays some manners I will respond in kind. Until than he is just another keyboard commando like we all run into on Internet forums.

You will never see me initiate criticism of another mans opinions. But will I tolerate rudeness.

Gentlemen,

Let's keep oral arguments above the belt line.

Thanks

[funkola]

Gentlemen,

Let's keep oral arguments above the belt line.

Thanks

Roger that.

[GregfromGa]

I don't need to be a tourist to give my opinion on how to approach two girls in the same building.

   Well do this big boy. The first thing you need to do is buy a ticket to somewhere and actually get your passport stamped before you think you have all the answers because as of right now you dont know jack. After you actually meet some girl over there,then and only then will your opinion be credible. And whats with all the name calling? Who are you trying to impress? Theres a concept call read more and post less. I suggest you adhere to that adage.

[Zhena]

We were speaking about "back up  plans" () just a reminding)
  And I didn't say that ALL women would refuse to be those back up plans  There are  enough who would accept such a chance to meet foreigner fiance for sure.( because of various reasons) 
 
I would not want to give appraisal neither to their brains nor to their self- respect. That's a matter of personal choice. For me personally this game, where "write many visit many"- "dating many in the same time in order to make right choice", "back up plans" and all such things which would be rather "dishonest" for dating in reality  are acceptable and reasonable things is just  not an option  in principle matter.
 And not because it would be hard for me to accept such behaviour of a man ( though it would be hard) but first of all because I myself could not behave in such a way. And such a "lack of brains" would make me outsider in this game for sure 

Elen,I never intended to say you have less brains I said that in general-not about you. I like your posts despite of you say negatively about many things-but I feel you have a level. Your negativiness may be a result of less experience with the foreigner men(for example,I dont know really) and the opinions of the people who surrounding you. That you could not behave yourself in this way,characterises you only from a good side. But you know,the love from the first sight happens very rare and mostly people have to see many to make a choice. We always comparing to get to know is that what we have is really right for us. Once a choice made,you concentrate on one person only. I dont see any crime there.

[Zhena]

About the advices and opinions on this forum...Noone from the guys is a real expert because their experience is somewhat limited by some girls. All girls are different(or you wanna argue about that?). So the general questions about FSU as the agencies,food,etc. are pretty useful....What towards the personal questions and the girls,here each will have his own opinion which is not the last true.

[Elen]

Elen do you still consider it dishonest if the man/woman is open about what they are doing. (seeing many people)

  Well ther are such rules in this game For this game it's "honest"  and "resonable" But I personaly ( as you ask me) could not play in this game Because I neigther would be finr with idea to be number N in a line who man was going to visit , nor I myself could "see" many men in the same time period "for purpose" keeping in mind to pick up the best from them ( never was able to do that. Just such a defect in brains  yes it's rather a defect which prevents to act in rational way at dating scene)

 But I do prefer to hear from man honest story about what he is doing ( though no , not in all cases In some cases I prefer not to know )

Ps

Elen,I never intended to say you have less brains I said that in general-not about you. I

I didn' take that like "personal message" I just applied "general speaking" to my person. 

[I/O]

(Sorry for calling you an "Oldie" I/O)...  heheheh   "Kuna

Kuna: You pulled off something which many of us thought virtually impossible because of the stress and time line.  I give you credit for your energy, which I suspect many of us could never have maintianed that schedule.  Whether or not it ultimately produces the result you hope for remains to be seen, but you seem to have found someone nice and I sincerely hope over time the two of you develop something special. Your comment summed up my thinking, yes it's possible, but not without stress.

Well my pedigree is improving in your eyes, last time it was a "Cantankerous old bastage", now it is simply oldie.  That'll work as I see that sad reality in the mirror every morning.  

I just smile at the way the newest "Font of all knowledge" considers experience worth nothing.  I doubt he will learn, because I doubt he has what it takes to get over there and get something done. You on the other hand have been enthusiastic beyond compare from the start, but at least have taken notice of those who have the experience.  Now novice? Of course, most of us are, but novice with some experience I suggest.  I understand you intend returning to the FSU in the near future to learn more and that to me speaks volumes.  I wondered for a while to be honest, but I tend to think now you might just be one who makes this thing work.

The contention I have made through out this thread is the presumtion that a woman who is prepared to be part of a mans meeting many is more mature, is total nonsense.  A more experienced dater maybe, but that has little or no bearing on her level of maturity.  Some of the serial daters are the most immature people I have seen anywhere.

As for meeting several, I suspect using the agent process makes this a lot simpler, but as for being straight up and telling them when you are arranging your own meetings that you will be meeting others, you will quite often get a reserved ok but very often you will get the "Heave Ho" pretty quick.  FWIW JB's wife has been lauded as one of the most respectable and worldly women known here on RWD and apparently she remarked to him that if she had been part of a multiple meeting list, they would not be married today. 

As for Joe Smuck rocking up to an apartment building in the FSU to meet someone/s again, ignorance is bliss.  He probably wouldn't find the building much less get in the ground floor door and even less anywhere near the apartment.  I think Mir well recognises the potential problems and as such came looking for some advice. Credit for that.

Highest among my many weaknesses, is "I don't suffer fools gladly" and none trip dumbers dispensing "How to in the FSU" advice are just that, fools.

I/O