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Author Topic: Good books about understanding women and men  (Read 27927 times)

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Offline AnastassiaAsh

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Good books about understanding women and men
« on: April 26, 2007, 09:55:51 AM »
Hello dear ladies and gents!

After some threads i thought these books can be a big source both for women and men on this board and the whole endevour. These are American authors and they don't address Russian women, but these books are on my night table and helped me immensely to understand my husband, and him to understand me.

I have been at one of the seminars of Gary Smalley, exciting experience. He voiced and wrote in his books what I (and lots of women i am sure) couldn't quite express right, it is a very easy and short reading too.

Here are the links, check them out:

http://store.roadtoglory.us/gasmbo.html

http://www.cbc-select.com/cowiyohul.html Connecting with your husband by Gary Smalley

http://www.cbc-select.com/cowiyowilli.html Connecting with your wife by Barbara Rosberg


Offline SANDRO43

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #1 on: April 26, 2007, 11:25:00 AM »
Anastasia (using Italian spelling ;)), we also have a section for book reviews here (http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?ind=reviews&op=section_view&idev=7), in case you may want to expand on your recommended titles.
Milan's "Duomo"

Offline macman

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #2 on: June 09, 2007, 11:10:08 AM »
Hey Sandro,

Thanks for pointing this out. . .

mm

Offline dneid

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #3 on: November 13, 2007, 03:02:42 PM »
Hey, Anastassia,
I have read several of Gary Smalley's books and they are great.  I would encourage all couples to read his books.  He is an awesome Christian Counselor who shares some profound wisdoms on relationships.
Thanks for pointing these out.  Also, Brenda and Dennis have several great books... look at amazon for one in particular:
http://www.amazon.com/Rekindling-Romance-Loving-Love-Your/dp/B000H2N0DU/ref=pd_sim_b_img_3/104-1733707-2811910

is a great book.  Written for both husband and wife.  Try it!!
Later,
Dale
Thanks,
Dale N.
Matt 11:28-30
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They leave the west behind

Offline pk-uk

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #4 on: November 13, 2007, 03:35:44 PM »
Isn't "Mars & Venus" supposed to be one of the definitive classics?

http://www.amazon.com/Men-Mars-Women-Venus-Understanding/dp/0060574216/ref=sr_1_3/104-2040657-6559159?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1194992094&sr=1-3

As one of the reviews said: "Gray deals with language a lot in this book, because "Martians" and "Venusians" speak different languages, and each is only remotely connected to English."  Does that mean it should be ideal for Americans & Russians?   ;);D   

PK

Offline dneid

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #5 on: November 13, 2007, 04:00:06 PM »
Hey, pk-uk,
Yes,
Mars/Venus is a classic book.  Great read and some wonderful techniques to deal with conflict.  I like Smalley and Rainey as well for their Christian principles.  All in all, everything mentioned here is great.
Later,
Dale
Thanks,
Dale N.
Matt 11:28-30
Well the Ukraine girls really knock me out
They leave the west behind

Offline Yelena

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #6 on: November 20, 2007, 09:39:29 PM »
If your relationship is in trouble or you just want to keep it healthy, I would recommend "Fighting for Your Marriage" by Howard Markman, Scott Stanley, Susan L. Blumberg

Online BillyB

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #7 on: November 20, 2007, 10:57:28 PM »
Welcome Yelena,

I looked at your site and you are inexpensive. How can you make any money translating each word in a letter for 1 cent with no minimum charge? Is it true that if I wrote "Hello, I think you're hot." to a RW(Russian woman), you'd translate it for a nickel?

So you live in Denver? How do you like it in America and how did you arrive here? My fiancee was also born in Tashkent, Uzbekistan just like you.

I hope you stick around and participate, you may find lots of customers here. Certainly your prices are more than fair.
There are people that will pass info about you and your family. Do not share info about yourself or share photos as they can search for you on the internet and distribute what they found since they are allowed to participate here.

Offline Johwilliam

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #8 on: January 22, 2008, 04:00:30 AM »
hai folks,

Here are some good books about understanding men and women. have a look at those 8)


http://quick-help.net/browse/men-women-understanding

Online Gator

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #9 on: January 22, 2008, 09:09:39 AM »
Yelena,

"Fighting for Your Marriage" is indeed a good book.  It was recommended to me two years ago by an eminent psychologist as the "best couples book". 

beachcomber556

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #10 on: January 27, 2008, 07:51:03 PM »
My wife's sister sent her two of Mars/Venus books translated into Russian.  She thought they were stupid and completely irrelevant.  Perhaps someone can recommend works on this topic by a highly respected Russian author??  Please!!!

beachcomber556

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #11 on: January 27, 2008, 08:43:55 PM »
Let me add that I got a copy of Mars and Venus in the Bedroom --in English -- the author was spot-on in his description of me as a man approaching the whole relationship.  He wasn't even close in describing Vika.  Do you ladies here on the Forum feel that his description of women and their needs and wants fit you?  Or is there truly a difference in the way Russian women and American women view and approach relationships?

Offline AnastassiaAsh

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #12 on: January 28, 2008, 10:47:38 AM »
Mars and Venus is a good book but might be a little old, frankly i didn't read it.

Here are some more books that were excellent and everybody should read them. They opened up my eyes too.  ;)

“Finding the Love of Your Life” by Neil Clark Warren

“Called Together” by Steve and Mary Prokopchak

“The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman

“A Celebration of Sex” by Dr. Douglas E. Rosenau

I read all of these.

 beachcomber556, order and read "The Five Love Languages"


Offline Co6aka

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #13 on: February 15, 2009, 07:10:43 PM »
The best-ever book on human relationships, and it's free:

Real-Time Relationships: The Logic of Love
http://freedomainradio.com/free/#RTR

 8)
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you;  that is the principal difference between a dog and a human."  --  Mark Twain

Offline Tamara

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #14 on: February 15, 2009, 09:13:42 PM »
Thank you for sharing another resource.  I will be reading it shortly.  Free is always good, too.  :clapping:
http://www.PrimeLanguageServices.com
Live Online Russian Lessons and Certified Translations</b>

Offline elliott

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #15 on: February 18, 2009, 10:41:08 PM »
The best-ever book on human relationships, and it's free:

Real-Time Relationships: The Logic of Love
http://freedomainradio.com/free/#RTR

 8)


Thanks for the link.  I started reading this book but didn't get too far into it.  My first thoughts included "I hope this author gets some counseling for his very deeply rooted issues" and "Where's my coffeepot?  I'm gonna' need some help staying awake while reading this mumble-jumble."     So far (admittedly, I'm not too far into the book), I'm giving it a   :thumbsdown:      Maybe I'll try it again after I'm re-energized.  Philosophers tend to bore me; I'd rather hang around guys that try to burp the alphabet than guys that ramble on about.....uh, whatever it is that philosophers ramble on about.
Never take a laxative and a sleeping pill together.

Offline Whynot

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #16 on: April 26, 2009, 07:00:50 AM »
This is my vote - simply the most profound treatise i have read on the subject:

http://www.amazon.com/Way-Superior-Man-David-Deida/dp/1591792576/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1240750761&sr=8-1

It has changed my life! 

WN?

Offline Shostakovich

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #17 on: December 28, 2009, 01:05:48 PM »
Nah - skip the modern books; too circumstantial - they skirt the central issues, are afraid of them.  I say, read Arthur Schopenhauer's 'Metaphysics of love between the sexes' an application note to his famous philosophy of 'World as Will and Idea'.  Then read up on Carl Jung's Anima/Animus projection theory.  Want to know what women really want?  Carl Jung has the answer for you: (paraphrasing) The thing that men do not understand about women is the yin, the void.  The modern debate eschews this perspective and claims women are the same psychologically as men but this perspective confuses embodiment, which blends both feminine and masculine with notions of feminine and masculine as abstract entities.  To the extent that a woman is feminine, and many are not, they'll seek the partner to fill them in some way but will also contain that spark which paradoxically, is emotionally stronger than the masculine.

Personally, I find the ancients have figured this out a long time ago.  The modern books may cast the debate in common language and are therefore more understandable, but miss the essence.


Offline sretana

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #18 on: January 09, 2010, 07:39:46 PM »
Good book about a Russian woman's experience
www.svetlanarepina.com
A lot on background, culture and relationships.
Also great articles on
http://www.internertomance.webs.com

Offline womenthebest

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #19 on: January 26, 2010, 08:06:31 AM »
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Offline SANDRO43

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #20 on: January 26, 2010, 09:26:13 AM »
Offer Offer Offer! Now perfect sex manual is available at only 10 euros! ! 10 euros! 10 euros! 10 euro you anyway and you probably be off the painkillers and etc ... try and you! say stop boredom from the bedroom. Send mail to: casevanzari@yahoo.com that contain the text: command manually. And we will send all details to take possession of it. Stop Bordorm.
If your manual is written in the same English you're using here, how much extra to include a decent translator/interpreter in the Offer Offer Offer ;D?
Milan's "Duomo"

Offline Aphonia

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #21 on: February 26, 2010, 12:35:24 AM »
Mars and Venus is a good book but might be a little old, frankly i didn't read it.

Here are some more books that were excellent and everybody should read them. They opened up my eyes too.  ;)

“Finding the Love of Your Life” by Neil Clark Warren

“Called Together” by Steve and Mary Prokopchak

“The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman

“A Celebration of Sex” by Dr. Douglas E. Rosenau

I read all of these.

 beachcomber556, order and read "The Five Love Languages"



Hi, I would add my 2 kopeks by referring to a RFU woman post on the book "The Five Love Languages": http://happyinterfamily.com/2009/12/01/on-the-five-languages-of-love/
There should be The Statue of Responsibility erected beside the Statue of Liberty

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #22 on: June 26, 2012, 07:01:45 AM »
Learn to impress Russian Brides by Chris the Director of Russian Brides Romance Tour 8). Get tips and also guide to marry beautiful russian ladies..  :clapping: http://www.ukrainetx.com is the best place to find russian ladies
Contact Russian Brides @ http://www.ukrainetx.com

Offline alyosha

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #23 on: June 28, 2012, 05:35:32 PM »
http://www.amazon.com/Uncoupling-Turning-Points-Intimate-Relationships/dp/0679730028

I will relate this to the Russian poem "Жди меня и я вернусь - Wait for Me"
 from WWII at the end.  Stand by.

Diane Vaughan's "uncoupling" is the best book I read about divorce after I was divorced.
Diane had chosen to divorce her first husband and later was divorced by her second husband.
She saw divorce from both sides.  She was also a psychologist. 
Diane took out adds in newspapers to find other people who had been divorced and interviewed them.  The patterns she noted she reported in her book.
Some of the lessons you learn from this book are applicable to other forms of personal loss, not just to divorce.
Someone who has been divorced will usually take up and activity or possesion that relates to the person who was lost.
But also my Mother took up rose gardening after my father died.  Rose gardening was his hobby.
Another woman who had been disowned by her mother over a divorce situation bought a car just like her mothers.
One of the important things to learn from Diane's book is that someone who is considering divorcing their spouse is usually afraid to mention the subject to their spouse.
And they often don't get comfortable with talking about a possible divorce until they have already decided.   
This leaves the unfortunate spouse with little warning.  The one who is going to be left behind has not enough time to repair the marriage.
One warning sign is when the spouse takes up new hobbies, activities or even affairs outside the marriage.
Another is when they begin to change their appearance by buying new clothes and dying their hair, getting a new hair style etc.
There was even a very popular American song where the writer, Billy Joel, wrote about this changing of clothes and hair style by his then wife, Crysty Brinkely.
Billy Joel knew something was wrong but apparently didn't realize just what.
The lyrics go:  "Don't go trying some new fashion.  Don't change the color of your hair 
You always have my unspoken passion though I might not seem to care."

It's a beautiful song and became a big hit.  But I'm told Billy Joel now hates this song he wrote.  I'm sure because it reminds him of his painful divorce.




Wait for me, and I'll return - only wait very hard;
Wait until you are filled with sorrow as you watch the yellow rain;
Wait when the wind sweeps the snowdrifts;
Wait in the sweltering heat;
Wait when others have stopped waiting, forgetting their yesterdays;
Wait when even from afar no letters come to you;
Wait even when others are tired of waiting;
Wait even when my mother and son think I am no more;
And when friends sit around the fire drinking to my memory,
Wait, and do not hurry to drink to my memory too;
Wait, for I'll return, defying every death;
And let those who do not wait say I was lucky;
They will never understand that, in the midst of death,
You, with your waiting, saved me;
Only you and I will know how I survived -
It's because you waited as no one else did.

Konstantin Simonov, 1941


The famous Russian WWII poem "Wait For Me" memorized by millions of Russian wives and mothers, was also written by a young man who, in the end, like Billy Joel, was left by the wife he wrote it for.
It is likely that both Simonov and Joel, a generation apart, recognized there was something wrong in their marriages and wrote a poen and a song respectively to their troubled wives.
« Last Edit: June 28, 2012, 06:15:16 PM by alyosha »

Offline vaiano777

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Re: Good books about understanding women and men
« Reply #24 on: July 17, 2012, 11:44:27 PM »
Since other links and book were recommended, I will recommend one.

www.lovinginukraine.com

www.lovinginukraine.blogspot.com

This is the first book that deals directly with the thinking and the mentality of Russian speaking girls and how you, as a man, can address your girl's thoughts, feelings, and needs in a way that can enhance your possibility of success.

Good luck to you all.

You can get everything you want in life by helping enough other people get what they want - Zig Ziglar  - Ukrainian Girls

 

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