All Good Things Come to an End

[I/O]

The Weekend............

[catzenmouse]

Absolutely Outstanding!

Congratulations to you both and here's to many, many more wonderful days, weeks, months, and years ahead!

Elena & Ken

[Simoni]

Beautiful pics.... what a great beginning!  Congratulations  & all good wishes for the future.

Simoni & Marina

[Jazzyclassy]

Congratulations my dearest I/O and his wife

warm wishes from me and my husband

all the best to you and live happily , I wish you great health , prosperity and harmony in your family

[Gator]

Beautiful couple.  Beautiful day.  Congratulations and best wishes.

[KenC]

Thanks for sharing your beautiful photos with us.  Congrats.
KenC

[Turboguy]

Great Photo's I/O.   Beautiful girl and nice looking couple.   Like everyone, VWRW and I wish you a lifetime of happiness.

[Blues Fairy]

Congratulations I/O!  The photos are breath-taking!

[2tallbill]

I/O

WOW!!!! (I have a way with words don't I)

Bill

[timothe]

Great pictures!! Congratulations to both of you!!

[ScottinCrimea]

Congrats, I?O1 It looks like you managed to snag the second best woman in the FSU! (Good thing I got there first!  )

[I/O]

Thanks to all from both of us for the various good wishes and a special thanks to those who have contacted us privately in one form or another.  Hope you have enjoyed the photos.

I/O

[BillyB]

Congrats I/O and Mrs. I/O on your marriage. Photos are great and I especially liked the one with your serious look when signing on the dotted line. With so many marriages lately, we should have some kind of honeymoon party at RWD. Nah, honeymoons are supposed to consist of two people, any more people and the honeymoon is over. 

[I/O]

MIL goes back home to Russia tomorrow morning and after 7 lovely weeks of having her here, I doubt there will be a dry eye in the group, including mine at the airport. I don't plan to allow this to be her last time here. One very special and discrete lady.

I/O

[KenC]

MIL goes back home to Russia tomorrow morning and after 7 lovely weeks of having her here, I doubt there will be a dry eye in the group, including mine at the airport. I don't plan to allow this to be her last time here. One very special and discrete lady.

I/O

I/O,
A sad day for sure!  Although there is something positive about having the in-laws more than a few thousand miles away too!   By having such a distance between us has allowed Lena to become even more independent than she was before.  She in essence has become her own woman devoid of her Mother's influences.  We both love her parents visits as they will be coming again in early January.  It isn't perfect, but Lena does speak with her parents almost every day still.
KenC

[I/O]

KenC: I vowed (Publically and somewhat in jest) some years back that if I ever married again, the parents either had to be dead or live in a distant country where I had control over whether or not they entered my country. There is a piece of me that smiles when I think of my comments, but I just cannot help but feel for my other half and her mum right now.

Just to add insult to injury, she is left to put up with me. More than any sane woman should be expected to endure.

I/O

[catzenmouse]

Just to add insult to injury, she is left to put up with me. More than any sane woman should be expected to endure.

LOL! I often think the craziest thing my wife ever did was to marry me. I'm sure she often has those same thoughts as well.

Ken

[jj]

I/O - congratulations!   great pictures, and beautiful bride and family.  Wishing you all the best of happiness !-jj

[AnastassiaAsh]

Well, so many days later but still Congrats from me too!  Wonderful pictures! And why is this thread called All Good Things Come to an End? ah, yeah, the time of being single came to an end.

What do you think  about it now I/O? Was being single better than now, being married? 

[I/O]

What do you think  about it now I/O? Was being single better than now, being married? 

Anastassia: There is benefits and drawbacks in all situations. Surfice to say, if I had really wanted to remain alone, I would never be here. You be the judge, but for me, no regrets about losing my single status.

I/O

[Jazzyclassy]

Anastassia: There is benefits and drawbacks in all situations. Surfice to say, if I had really wanted to remain alone, I would never be here. You be the judge, but for me, no regrets about losing my single status.

I/O

Hey of course no regrets your lost crazy lonely life , now you are happy and  in harmony with your family life and things , you are loved and cared of I think marriage life changes people mostly for the best, they stop being selfish and crazy self centred  , they fill their lives with new sense

[KenC]

I/O,
Why is it that some people think we were lonely before we met our wives?    :noidea: From our conversations I know you had about the same lifestyle as me as a single man and that wasn't a lonely existence any way you cut it.    In fact. marriage kind of settled things down for me.
KenC

[Gator]

The sun rose in the West today because I will defend Jazzy, or at least give her the benefit of the doubt.  This may be an issue of mistranslation. 

Some RW tend to consider that if you are not married, you are “one”.  From that possibly comes “alone” or “lonely”.  This is closer to our common use of the term “single” rather than the definition of “lonely” as being “destitute of female companionship”.   Just a thought, not a declaration, and I could be wrong.  Perhaps a translator can clarify.

KenC, you raise a more important point.  The best way to approach RW is to come from an active single life.  In that way, a man can compare two “positives”.

If a man is indeed “lonely” (destitute of female companionship), marrying a cross-cultural RW is not the cure.  The cure is to fix what prevents women from finding him interesting or lovable.   Otherwise, the same problems will emerge with the new RW wife, and perhaps sooner than later. 

[Simoni]

If a man is indeed “lonely” (destitute of female companionship), marrying a cross-cultural RW is not the cure.  The cure is to fix what prevents women from finding him interesting or lovable.   Otherwise, the same problems will emerge with the new RW wife, and perhaps sooner than later. 

Very true, Gator.  As you say, the fact is that it is much more difficult making a life together with an FSU woman than with an American woman.  There are many reasons for this, that include homesickness and culture shock.  But the positives are there, too.

But the fact is that only a balanced person who is happy in life before marriage to an fsu girl should consider it.

So I/0, I move you change the name of your thread to "All Good Things Continue, But Now Life is More Complicated :-) "

but for me, no regrets about losing my single status.

[jb]

This thread has taken an interesting tack, and while I haven’t posted much lately I thought Gator’s comment was worth a reply.  It is likewise interesting that Lily is curious about how marriage is affecting I/O.  I.e., is he better off married than he was when single?
 
Coming from a place that is somewhat different from the usual visitor to RWD, I have long thought that the various reasons men give for beginning the search for a RW mate are as screwy as they are misguided.   What we very often see from the newbie are indeed some emotionally “lonely” men.   Gator nailed it.  Men coming into this arena from a healthy single life are probably better equipped emotionally to deal with marriage than the socially inept. 

Many of our newbie’s are coming out of divorce disasters and haven’t a clue about dating since it’s been years since they’ve had to get out and actually intermingle with the opposite sex for the purpose of seeking out someone to couple up with.  These are the men who I call “those with a wife vacancy”, and they feel the need to fill this hole in their life in a hurry.   This, IMHO, is a receipt for failure.  May I suggest men consider some of the following; if you see yourself in any of this you may not be ready for a trip to the FSU.

Are you certain of your own inner-most fundamentally held values?  Do you really know yourself? Are you quite sure of what you want in a partner?  Understanding that those inner-most values are the things you grew up with and are not likely to change regardless of whom you marry.  If you grew up believing in God, you most likely will not find true compatibility with a non-believer.  Deep down inside of you there are patterns which define you as a person; these things will not change no matter what happens around you.  If you have already figured that part out, you are miles ahead of the rest of the pack.  OTOH, if you are looking for someone to “complete” you, as in the Tom Cruise movie, “Jerry McGuire”, you still have a great deal of work to do.  There isn’t a woman on this planet that can fulfill your emotional needs, only you can provide the emotional stability and fulfillment for yourself that will make you happy.   Only after a man has come to terms with who he is, and has done the necessary introspection to come to grips with his own emotional needs, will he have a chance at success.

When having a look at the MOB sites, one sees only the pretty faces and slender bodies, accompanied by a half a paragraph of myth designed to suck the poor smuck into the clutches of an often times, very shady industry.  There is, once again, IMHO, no way to examine the woman’s values, i.e., those things about her which reflect her inner-most, and fundamentally, held values based solely upon what you see listed on a marriage agency’s website.  Believe me when I tell you, it is that basic ground rule which will determine ultimate compatibility and marriage bliss.  This is the reason why I, and others who have been down this road, discourage the “One Week Wonder” syndrome.  Even when a trip is following up weeks and months of correspondence, a man doesn’t really know what, or who, he’s really dealing with until significant time is spent together.   That can only be revealed after several months of dating, not sleeping with, a potential partner.  However, I do believe that one of the beauties of long distance relationships is that for the most part the people are not sleeping together; they are spending countless hours in communications getting to know each other.  This very often plays a key role in the relationship building phase because if the interest remains high after the initial buzz, that physical attraction and lust most often referred to as “chemistry”, wears off, then there is a slight chance of success.  If, OTOH, after 90 days of trying to put it together without the physical presence and intimate sexual attraction, the image of her begins to fade from your memory, then a man needs to reevaluate his personal goals and reasons for being here in the first place.   This is not the place to get instant gratification.

I’ve read it somewhere, and I’m sure we have all heard the old adage that opposites attract, however if you look at the reality of relationships that have been around awhile and have withstood the test of time, it is usually those commonly held values that hold two people together, not the opposite poles of a magnet.   Marriage to someone from such a different culture is a total crapshoot when you think about it; perhaps that is why the success rate in these foreign relationships is so incredibly small.  We Americans, and I think westerners in general, like to think we can rise above any problem, when in fact we frequently have trouble succeeding in a marriage with one of our own kind.   It is, IMHO, total arrogance to think success will automatically come when you decide to mix cultures, races, religions, and completely different economic upbringings.  This is going to require a great deal of effort to succeed under the best of circumstances.

If I/O has done his homework, and I think he has, I would be quite comfortable in saying he is probably much happier being married than he was while single.  I know that I’m better off in almost every way being married to my wife.

Just some thoughts...