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Poll

How did you meet your wife or fiance?

WNVS w/ agency help
WMVS w/ agency help
WOVO w/ agency help
WSVS w/ agency help
Really on business
ICQ or other chat line
While teaching English
Met her in the USA
While on a "tour"
WNVS w/o agency help
WMVS w/o agency help
WOVO w/o agency help
WSVS w/o agency help

Author Topic: How you met your wife or fiance part II  (Read 13060 times)

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Offline Mir

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #50 on: November 08, 2007, 02:46:15 PM »
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My fiancee knew I wrote to many women and she feels honored that I chose her over many others. The fact I had other opportunities in my life made me more valuable as a man. Women tend to think if a man doesn't have many choices in women, there's something wrong with him.


You see Billie some women are like your fiancee who needs a guy to be wanted by many women , only then they value him , well why not that is their own phylosophy ,that is how they are  many women are like that

So that means when they start their wonderful life in the Land of the free and home of the brave she will need constant reminding that Billy is in high demand by other women. Cause if she finds out that he has lost his magnetic pull for the XX-species and no longer has many choices she will tend to lose interest in him. Interesting :)

Offline groovlstk

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #51 on: November 08, 2007, 02:47:58 PM »
I don't really support any single method of meeting women, although in the past I've recommended WMVM to guys fresh to this venture.

Like Jazzy & Serebro, my wife would have dumped me like a used metro card if I had made plans to meet other women during our initial meeting.

I could have reasoned with her until I was blue in the face - like you guys are attempting with Jazzy & Serebro - about finances, limited vacation time, my need to be sure she was the right one for me, etc. She would have simply never accepted my case, no matter how logical or reasonable I presented it. In this instance I "walked the line" despite my misgivings, and it was one of the best decisions of my life.

The lesson in all this is that there simply is no ideal or single path to success.
 
« Last Edit: November 08, 2007, 02:50:08 PM by groovlstk »

Offline Mir

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #52 on: November 08, 2007, 02:52:53 PM »
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The lesson in all this is that there simply is no ideal or single path to success

And if you do go on a VM trip them each one you meet should believe that you came just to meet her :)

Offline pk-uk

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #53 on: November 08, 2007, 03:43:56 PM »
I agree with Serebro I would never date a guy who came to visit many women at once and I never did :)
That is personal choice and personal culture and depends on  what is important for you !
 Some people would say that WOVO is completely non successful , well for some category of people who  have different aims , of course this way of doing things wont help them...

People who want to create stable, serious relations likely always do WOVO trip and usually succeed, those who are always in search I suggest that marriage is not for them , as many people think that phsycology of a person changes when he is married and if he was happy- go -lucky and unfaithful person  he would be somebody else, do not expect him to change after marriage, it is likely he will stay the same moreover his lacks will be worsen and  he will continue his search when you are becoming old a little bit chubby middle aged woman...
Men they are very scared to get old, so they will switch their youth button and sail for a younger blood. Those guys who stick to this many women on one trip obviously  are not ready to get settled , I do not trust such men , it is like in the  University ,one boy is dating several girls at a time, Is he ready to be a husband or moreover a father? Of course not!
Unfortunately such boys from Uni may never grow up and after they are 50 they still think like that-Why not? why not to date several women I need my chemistry - What is chemistry to most of you? Sexual attraction, or you mean soul mate connection? Well that is a big question and each of us understands it how we need to and think is right.

Anyway am just speaking my mind, for the majority of guys here my opinion is wrong  in the first place so who ever cares .......

Jazzy,

I don't say your opinion is wrong, but it does seem to be based on a particular mindset with a certain amount of stereotyping.

Believe me, I was serious in wanting a stable, loving relationship, but I'm not sure the WOVO would necessarily have worked for me.  For example:

- We meet.  She does not look like her picture.  It is her younger sister.
- We meet.  She is engaged, but does not think the K11 (or whatever it is) will be successful.
- I arrive.  I phone the flat where she has told me she lives alone.  A man answers.  It's her boyfriend, but she is trying to leave him....

I did do one VO.  She wrote to me six months after I'd written to her.  She lived in St Petersburg, a place I'd always wanted to visit, so I went.  Even though we'd got on very well on the phone, within two hours her body language was already indicating what the likely outcome of the 10-day trip was going to be.

Despite that, I didn't give up but I wasn't wrong. Had a good holiday though - St P is a fantastic place and I'd love to return there again during the 'white nights'.  Two days after I left she flew off on an all-expenses paid trip to the West Indes.  She enjoyed her holiday, too  :)

But onto the mindset.  It is obvious you see this WMVM as multiple-dating as you liken it to somebody at University dating many.  But surely this is different?  In the Univerity scenario you have met the people, probably got to know them face-to-face a little and then embarked on a relationship.

With WMVM you haven't even met, so surely this cannot be seen as unfaithful, as you seem to imply.  Unless, maybe, the guy has promised undying love and devotion before even meeting  ::)

Yes, I agree that some people do not change, even as they age.  Yes, I agree that some (men) probably see WMVM as a trip into the 'chemistry department'.  But hey, we're all different and just because someone goes on a WMVM doesn't mean that all he is interested in is putting a few more notches on the dipstick.

So no, your opinion is not wrong, Jazzy and you are right, it depends on your personal culture (and  maybe, experiences) and what is right for you.  Luckily for me, not all Russian women agree with you.

Best Wishes,

Paul

By the way, re the 'dead horse thread' - don't believe everything you read about the UK, there is life beyond hotels and it was only opinion, not fact as it was portrayed to be.  My wife's opinion would differ, for example.

I wish you all the best with your Englishman.

Offline Gator

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #54 on: November 08, 2007, 04:31:46 PM »
Serebro,

I did not read this entire thread.  Did you answer  the following somewhere:  If a man decides to come to Russia to meet you and only you, do you at that time terminate correspondence with every other man in your pipeline?  Saying to the others that you have found a man and you hope everything works out favorably.

If not, why not?

Everyone Else,

My Moscow woman preferred when men that she really liked would come to see her, just her.  Happened a few times.  However, she did not mind the WMVM because she felt that she had the freedom to walk away after 30 minutes, with no obligation to entertain him.  Happened a few times (I think so - she's asleep now and I will not awaken her to hear that I am an idiot).

Personally, I took about 30-35 WOVO trips and 3 WMVM trips.  The WOVO trips followed WMVM trips.  In each of my WMVM trips, I found someone whom I really liked and wanted to know more about, just her, no one else, and I gave her 100% of my attention.  Is that not a WOVO?

Interesting fact:  In two cases where I started doing WOVO after my WMVM (i. e., becoming exclusive in my mind), she was still writing if not seeing others.  I never raised the topic of exclusivity, but let it happen naturally in her heart without discussing it.


Offline I/O

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #55 on: November 08, 2007, 04:59:15 PM »
I/O,
The key (as I see it) to being successful in meeting many women without being deceptive or misleading is not to get romanically involved beforehand.KenC
Absolutely, but in reality the vast majority do get emotionally involved to a more or less extent. (I deliberately choose to differ between emotionally and romantically as IMO the is a clear distinction even in this pursuit)

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but others may view it as being introduced to women interested in meeting men from your home country.
As well they may. Perception gradually becomes reality in an individuals own mind after time, whether correct or not. (I am not exempting myself from this either BTW)

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What is wrong with a single man being introduced to single women?
Absolutely nothing wrong with this. As such I have started to shift my view of some agencies over time. This is IMO where they can have a useful and somewhat clinical role to play. If one arrives at an agency and is simply introduced to a number of unknown women, then I think if the people involved can handle it, that is just great. My concern is that this almost never happens. Very often the guy has gotten himself set on one or more particular girls prior and this is where the deception and temptation to drift to a more exclusive seeming level of communications can occur.

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I have long advocated that men use marriage agencies as introduction agencies.
Yep, I would go along with this thought. Nevertheless, with the proliferation of so called dating sites around, very many guys go another way and do get involved far more personally than perhaps they should prior to meeting.

If I was to give advice on this subject, and I shouldn't because I don't have the experience to back it up, it would be, if one is using the internet introduction sites, to narrow it down to one lady to visit, build something of an association with her and get aligned with an agency to use as a back up. This way, they don't waste a trip if the lady of choice doesn't work out, they have the opportunity to meet as many as they choose, they need tell no stories to anyone and it takes the pressure off all concerned. Of course this is given that a guy can handle the clinical situation of meeting ladies cold in an agency environment.

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After the introductions, keep them (the agency) out of the loop as much as possible and let nature take it's course.
Agreed...!! Agents may consider they have a role to play at a later stage and perhaps they do, however I simply cannot understand how two people can build a relationship whilst a third person, be it agent, terp or other is closely involved.

My situation is a total abberation as my wife first wrote to me seeking opinion on almost unrelated subjects. We developed a very old fashioned "Pen Friend" association and somewhere along the line "The Penny Dropped" for both of us that we might be developing something more. There is no question in either of our minds that by the time we met, we were looking to see if there was some reason we should not be together, rather than the usual routine of seeing if clicked together. The ironic result of that was that our early times together were about as unromantic as they come and frankly we are not a whole lot different now. Both of us may have romantic notions from time to time, but we would be the worst in the world at articulating them to each other in what others might say is recognisable form.

I have come to understand over the last six to twelve months how absolutely hopeless my wife is at writing letters and this has driven home to me the point of just how much effort she did put in to letters over the first year or more. They were excellent. Age old story, she tosses the bait, he chases until she catches him. Go figure.

I/O
 

Offline Serebro

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #56 on: November 08, 2007, 08:01:16 PM »
deccie, I have never tried to learn English because "that comes down to my self-respect". I have always had a great self-respect.That's the way my parents upbrought me.
Yes the things that I offer should have impressed you in a great way as a given. If not correspond with other girls, send money to them in order to be able to understand what they are really saying to you, not WHAT THEY ARE SHOWING to you.
Thank you,Christian!:)

Simoni, hahahahaha!!!!!!!You're funny!
But there's a small problem :I am corresponding with a guy now and he may come to meet me and I am not into SM(see many).

BillyB, it depends on the"spark" or intuition, whenever you call it.
AS for feeling honored that I was chosen over many others, I am not into competitions when it comes to people's feelings.This is the man who is supposed to attract my attention.


HiTech, I am sorry about your current financial position.Stop sending your money to scammers  and you will not have to ask us for money to cover the cost of your travelling to Ukraine.

Gator,
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Serebro,

I did not read this entire thread.  Did you answer  the following somewhere: If a man decides to come to Russia to meet you and only you, do you at that time terminate correspondence with every other man in your pipeline?  Saying to the others that you have found a man and you hope everything works out favorably.

If not, why not?
Yes,!!!But I am sure that by the time he comes I will correspond with 1 man only. :D

The problem is that I am a very sensitive and very naive girl at the same time.Every time I correspond with someone I write my real feelings and intentions. I give analysis to my actions and many things that happen/have happened in my life. That was what I wrote about in my post concerning the man I corresponded with and that spoke with the others at the same time. I couldn't understand why I opened my heart and my real feelings to him and he ... sent those type of letters to me and to someone else!!!!!!!!!!!!That's something beyond my understanding.That was why I refused to meet though he seemed to be a very nice guy and I hope that he has found his girl.



Let me finish with the best thing I have ever heard in this thread:
I don't really support any single method of meeting women, although in the past I've recommended WMVM to guys fresh to this venture.

Like Jazzy & Serebro, my wife would have dumped me like a used metro card if I had made plans to meet other women during our initial meeting.

I could have reasoned with her until I was blue in the face - like you guys are attempting with Jazzy & Serebro - about finances, limited vacation time, my need to be sure she was the right one for me, etc. She would have simply never accepted my case, no matter how logical or reasonable I presented it. In this instance I "walked the line" despite my misgivings, and it was one of the best decisions of my life.

The lesson in all this is that there simply is no ideal or single path to success.
 
there's nothing to add...

Offline Simoni

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #57 on: November 08, 2007, 08:35:13 PM »

Simoni, hahahahaha!!!!!!!You're funny!
But there's a small problem :I am corresponding with a guy now and he may come to meet me and I am not into SM (see many).

That's great, Serebro.  But be careful. Most men who write FSU women never make the trip across the ocean.  That's why most russian girls push the man to come to see her quickly.  They have learned that long letter writing experiences do not usually produce a man knocking at their door in their home city.

You ought to give Christian an opportunity :-)

« Last Edit: November 08, 2007, 08:37:02 PM by Simoni »

Offline Serebro

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #58 on: November 08, 2007, 08:43:44 PM »
That's great, Serebro.  But be careful. Most men who write FSU women never make the trip across the ocean.  That's why most russian girls push the man to come to see her quickly.  They have learned that long letter writing experiences do not usually produce a man knocking at their door in their home city.

You ought to give Christian an opportunity :-)


Thank you for being optimistic, Simoni!
But I am not " most Russian girls" :D

Offline Jazzyclassy

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #59 on: November 08, 2007, 10:42:17 PM »
Pk-Uk  thank you  for expressing your opinion in a  nice gentleman way  I appreciate it very much, as you noticed I told that for me write one and visit one is the best thing, call  it a stereotype or anything
Of course my opinion is based on my own experience and on my personal culture , I never told that write many visit many is bad as well , just those men who practise such things are of no interest for me , that's it :)
Plus if you observe the phsycology of many (not all ) women you can say that they will agree with me, each woman wants to be special , unique and individual and wants the man to focus all his attention on her and not to be chosen like horse from the flock cos she has nice white solid teeth, finally we are talking about people here and not about animals or goods

Well you were pointing out on the fact if you did not like each other when you met in person for example , of course such unfortunate things happen, as the ones where you find out that she has a boyfriend and so on , but then again these are indecent women, if she lied to you in the first place about being engaged, you could somehow understand it by her behaviour in the chat or something. I can assure you if that is a decent girl and you write and chat to her and all is goin  great , it is unlikely you wont like her in person really, even if she is not that stunning in appearance she will conquer you with her spirit and wonderful soul , well of course many things can happen but if your relations are genuine and sincere from the start it should be all good in the end :)

I am  russian woman my opinion will be probably more understood among girls not among foreign rather grown up men that's for sure. I understand the erratic nature of many men though  who will be always for "write many and visit many" so it is all natural , I   was lucky to find the man who is matching me and would never be with me if I was like -Write many and meet many men , so we found each other :) :kissing:

Paul, thank you for the good wishes , let them return to you as well :)
« Last Edit: November 08, 2007, 10:48:36 PM by Jazzyclassy »

Offline Jazzyclassy

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #60 on: November 08, 2007, 10:59:14 PM »
Btw can not you see the results of the poll, you non believers  of "write one visit one" method !!!!  :tongueout: :tongueout: :mooning: :mooning:
« Last Edit: November 08, 2007, 11:01:16 PM by Jazzyclassy »

Offline Kuna

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #61 on: November 08, 2007, 11:18:18 PM »
Has anyone noticed I didn't bother posting in ANOTHER WMVM/WOVO thread???  It's a pointless exercise I tell ya!   ;)

It's a little ironic this thread is running at about the same time as the "Introspective" thread though...  at the end of the day, doesn't it just come down to what's best for each individual?

We can all take sides one way or another...  but many ladies won't even meet someone on a WMVM trip... 

Personally, I planned a WMVM - but in hindsight I wish it was WOVO.   ;D

Offline Jazzyclassy

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #62 on: November 08, 2007, 11:32:23 PM »
Yeah I find it pointless as well , but I posted here for the other reason :non of these men on the forum can change my opinion the same as I have no intentions to change theirs and I want them to understand that!

Offline Misha

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #63 on: November 08, 2007, 11:36:43 PM »
Btw can not you see the results of the poll, you non believers  of "write one visit one" method !!!!  :tongueout: :tongueout: :mooning: :mooning:

The question is not whether it is possible, rather whether it is probable. The principle of the WOVO is very romantic, but the odds are not very good for the man (and the woman): the chances are that the woman will not fall for him or he won't fall for her. There is maybe what a 1 in 10 or 1 in 20 chance that they will hit it off and both will fall in love? Maybe even less.

I would not take the poll as proof that WOVO leads to greater success. I would hypothesize that many failed WOVO likely gave up after their first trip and won't be participating in such forums :) As a consequence, the poll is biased in favor of the "success stories" and the results here may not be an accurate reflection of reality.

Offline deccie

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #64 on: November 09, 2007, 12:01:32 AM »
deccie, I have never tried to learn English because "that comes down to my self-respect". I have always had a great self-respect.That's the way my parents upbrought me.
You don't understand me again. I'm saying that if you are not in a relationship with someone then the paying for one's expenses on your own is a matter of self respect. I did not mean to imply that the learning of English was a matter of self respect.


« Last Edit: November 09, 2007, 12:42:59 AM by deccie »

Offline Serebro

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #65 on: November 09, 2007, 01:23:59 AM »
You don't understand me again. I'm saying that if you are not in a relationship with someone then the paying for one's expenses on your own is a matter of self respect. I did not mean to imply that the learning of English was a matter of self respect.



You don't understand me, too and to be honest I can see no reason in explaining something to you.As it will change nothing.Mean things will be mean no matter how many excuses and explanations you find for them...

Offline deccie

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #66 on: November 09, 2007, 01:28:15 AM »
Mean things will be mean no matter how many excuses and explanations you find for them...

As they will for you too.
Does the world (or men?) owe you a living?

Offline Bruce

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #67 on: November 09, 2007, 03:30:50 AM »
WOVO is clearly higher than I have ever seen it before.  Why?  I offer three explanations.  1.  Once you go on a WNVS or WSVS and then correspond with only one you are not the product of a WOVO.  Therefore, my first theory is that people do not know what a WOVO is.  A WOVO is a guy who looks all over the internet, finds one woman, corresponds with her solely and then flys over to meet her after a correspondence that hopefully includes phone calls.  A guy who WMVO is pretty much a WOVO for visiting one, but in reality he wrote many / corresponded with many before visiting one.  2.  The poll is influenced by people with an agenda who are not a fiance or married and decided to gum up the works by increasing the WOVO numbers.  3.  Since it is a married or fiance poll the numbers may be higher.  The reality is that the married only poll shows way lower numbers for WOVO.  Last time we did it on this board there was only a few out of roughly 40 that were married with the WOVO method.  Still, my intuition tells me that if a guy found one girl, wrote her and corresponded with her and then visited only her and it clicked once and then again to the point of marriage - you'd think they would have a greater chance of remaining married.

Serebro, I hope for the best for you, but suggest that the more single guys you communicate with on this board the better off you are.  Remember the advice from Simoni ie. most guys do not make the trip.  If I were you I would not place all your eggs in one basket or give the guy a definite deadline to get on the plane and meet you. 

KenC, the way I interpret your situation is that you went to an agency with a number one girl in mind.  You actually clicked with that number one girl after meeting a few others just to be sure and the rest is history.  I do not remember if you had a correspondence with your wife or not prior to meeting.  I call that WNVS or WSVS with the help of an agency.  I would have expected a few more to have met while really on business, but it is tough to get everyone to fit themselves into a definition for the purposes of a poll which could have been constructed better.   Still, it was an inference and the bottom line to me is that WOVO very well could be alive and well.........
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline Misha

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #68 on: November 09, 2007, 07:34:12 AM »
WOVO is clearly higher than I have ever seen it before.  Why?  I offer three explanations.  1.  Once you go on a WNVS or WSVS and then correspond with only one you are not the product of a WOVO.  Therefore, my first theory is that people do not know what a WOVO is.  A WOVO is a guy who looks all over the internet, finds one woman, corresponds with her solely and then flys over to meet her after a correspondence that hopefully includes phone calls.  A guy who WMVO is pretty much a WOVO for visiting one, but in reality he wrote many / corresponded with many before visiting one.  2.  The poll is influenced by people with an agenda who are not a fiance or married and decided to gum up the works by increasing the WOVO numbers.  3.  Since it is a married or fiance poll the numbers may be higher.  The reality is that the married only poll shows way lower numbers for WOVO.  Last time we did it on this board there was only a few out of roughly 40 that were married with the WOVO method.  Still, my intuition tells me that if a guy found one girl, wrote her and corresponded with her and then visited only her and it clicked once and then again to the point of marriage - you'd think they would have a greater chance of remaining married.

And then there would also be the serial WOVO: i.e. write one, visit one, things don't work out, then write another one and visit another one, and continue until successful. The end result is still the same: he wrote many and visited many, but all in different trips.

You are right about your first point. Most people won't only write the one woman. If the odds are not good that you will meet and click with someone the first time you meet, what are the odds that you will find the right woman immediately, that she will still be available, that she won't find someone else that interests her more, that she will put in the time and energy to write or talk to you on the phone, that she will meet you and that she will fall in love with you on the first real date and you will fall for her on the first meeting face-to-face with and that everything will be perfect until the altar? 100 to 1 against you? 1000 to 1?

Offline KenC

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #69 on: November 09, 2007, 07:44:14 AM »
Bruce,
I guess I would be WOVS.  My first trip was to visit Lena and check out women at LTP.  Lena and I had talked on the phone for almost 2 months before meeting.  Our first meeting was magical, but I still went ahead and met some others.
KenC
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Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies-Thomas Jefferson

Offline Serebro

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #70 on: November 09, 2007, 07:48:09 AM »
And then there would also be the serial WOVO: i.e. write one, visit one, things don't work out, then write another one and visit another one, and continue until successful. The end result is still the same: he wrote many and visited many, but all in different trips.
It is not the same.
When you are going to meet one you think about it all the time, you prepare for the meeting.. but if you are going to visit many you don't pay attention to one woman as an unique person, she is only one of many and at the end of meeting you are curious what the next one will be like...

Offline Misha

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #71 on: November 09, 2007, 07:59:21 AM »
It is not the same.
When you are going to meet one you think about it all the time, you prepare for the meeting.. but if you are going to visit many you don't pay attention to one woman as an unique person, she is only one of many and at the end of meeting you are curious what the next one will be like...

You can pay attention to one woman as a unique person, but still realize on the first date that you are not into one another. The reality of the matter is that most women will decide whether or not they are interested in you in the first minute you meet. If there is no "chemistry" in that first minute, then it is pretty much a hopeless cause when it comes to romance and a potential relationship. You may become great friends, but that is pretty much it. Likewise, the man may not fall for her either.

As for being curious as what to the next one will be like, I would say that you will be curious if things do not click with the woman that you are with. If there is no chemistry, if you realize that you share anything in common, if you discover on your date that she is still in love with someone else, if you discover that she is not interested in you, and so forth. Yes you will be interested in meeting ANYBODY else at that point.

Serebro, I am curious. What is your philosophy when it comes to dating Russian men? Would you expect the same thing? Would you expect that a man in Russia would already be interested in you and only you before the first date or would you see the first date as simply a way of getting to know someone and if things don't work out both of you will look for someone else?
« Last Edit: November 09, 2007, 08:20:30 AM by gabaub »

Offline Bluebell

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #72 on: November 09, 2007, 08:03:13 AM »
I think you underestimate the cost of my exercise, too.
I took private English lessons 3-5 times a week after lessons/work for more than 3 years' time.
I used my own money for that. I have 2 higher educations.I didn't ask anyone to pay for me.
I didn't ask foreign men to send money to me.

So why should I count his money he spends on his trip?!Does he count mine when he comes to me after a few months of every day letters and phone calls(DO YOU CALL THIS a BLIND DATE) without paying for interpretors or translations and meets 10 more girls who went to night clubs after lessons and have sex when they were students instead of learning something else like I did?! I don't offer him a child from the previous marriage he will have to pay for. Though I am ready to date/marry a man with a child.
?!
All I want is to be the only one. Ain't I worth it?!!!!

Serebro, have you learnt English only for the sole purpose of meeting and possibly marrying a foreign man? Did you get your education only for the purpose of attracting more quality foreign men and so having better chances to marry one of them? One would think that you did all this only and only for yourself. Even if you did it for increasing your chances for a better marriage, I still don't see how this compares to the considerable expenses of a man (who, by the way, might have spent his youth and money also with getting degrees,  going to gyms to have a nicer body, in one word with perfecting himself) who travels half of the world for a blind date?

You see, when I was learning foreign languages (among them Russian too) and I was studying to get a higher education, it never accrossed my mind that for all this one day somebody owes me something. I did everything for myself and I am happy that I did it because this way now I am the person who I am (a happy one, needless to say).  :)

Offline Simoni

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance part II
« Reply #73 on: November 09, 2007, 08:11:35 AM »
WOVO is clearly higher than I have ever seen it before.  Why?  I offer three explanations.  1.  Once you go on a WNVS or WSVS and then correspond with only one you are not the product of a WOVO.  Therefore, my first theory is that people do not know what a WOVO is.  A WOVO is a guy who looks all over the internet, finds one woman, corresponds with her solely and then flys over to meet her after a correspondence that hopefully includes phone calls.  A guy who WMVO is pretty much a WOVO for visiting one, but in reality he wrote many / corresponded with many before visiting one.  2.  The poll is influenced by people with an agenda who are not a fiance or married and decided to gum up the works by increasing the WOVO numbers.  3.  Since it is a married or fiance poll the numbers may be higher.  The reality is that the married only poll shows way lower numbers for WOVO.  Last time we did it on this board there was only a few out of roughly 40 that were married with the WOVO method.  Still, my intuition tells me that if a guy found one girl, wrote her and corresponded with her and then visited only her and it clicked once and then again to the point of marriage - you'd think they would have a greater chance of remaining married.

Serebro, I hope for the best for you, but suggest that the more single guys you communicate with on this board the better off you are.  Remember the advice from Simoni ie. most guys do not make the trip.  If I were you I would not place all your eggs in one basket or give the guy a definite deadline to get on the plane and meet you. 

KenC, the way I interpret your situation is that you went to an agency with a number one girl in mind.  You actually clicked with that number one girl after meeting a few others just to be sure and the rest is history.  I do not remember if you had a correspondence with your wife or not prior to meeting.  I call that WNVS or WSVS with the help of an agency.  I would have expected a few more to have met while really on business, but it is tough to get everyone to fit themselves into a definition for the purposes of a poll which could have been constructed better.   Still, it was an inference and the bottom line to me is that WOVO very well could be alive and well.........

Good post, Bruce. Very insightful.

On the trip I met Marina, I had written half a dozen girls, including her.  I ranked them according to the way I liked them. Marina was number one.   And the first girl I met there.  But it was not instantly great, so I went ahead and met the other girls.  Out of those six, two were possible good matches.   Marina kind of messed it up-- she kept calling me during my dates; I think she knew the drill.  Finally, I dumped my schedule and spent the last few days with her.

It was a wise move.

And I feel much better about it even today, because having met other girls, I know I'm with the best girl.  Comparison is a good thing.



Offline Simoni

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Re: How you met your wife or fiance (data discussion)
« Reply #74 on: November 09, 2007, 12:05:08 PM »
Don't know where some of you guys took stat, but your conclusions that the poll suggests WOVO is the winner does not agree with the data.

Here is the current data as of this post:

Question:    How did you meet your wife or fiance?
WNVS w/ agency help    3 (8.6%)
WMVS w/ agency help    4 (11.4%)
WOVO w/ agency help    1 (2.9%)
WSVS w/ agency help    1 (2.9%)
Really on business    2 (5.7%)
ICQ or other chat line    3 (8.6%)
While teaching English    1 (2.9%)
Met her in the USA    1 (2.9%)
WMVS w/o agency help    5 (14.3%)
WOVO w/o agency help    12 (34.3%)
WSVS w/o agency help    2 (5.7%)
Total Voters: 35

Let's combine into two categories; 1) Going to see one girl 2) Exploring or visiting many or just living life in the fsu.

We see the following for number one, the romantics who went to see one girl and only one girl:

WOVO w/ agency help    1
WOVO w/o agency help    12
Total Voters: 13

Now consider number two:

WNVS w/ agency help    3
WMVS w/ agency help    4
WSVS w/ agency help    1
Really on business    2
ICQ or other chat line    3
While teaching English    1
WMVS w/o agency help    5
WSVS w/o agency help    2
Total Voters: 21

Looks like Number Two wins, 21 to 13.  A landslide for not trying to choose only one girl in advance.   
Even if you drop out business and teaching English and chat, you still have a 15 to 14 trend toward not going at it one girl at a time.

That's how I see the data.

Only 13 WOVO. 

The majority took another approach.




« Last Edit: November 09, 2007, 12:11:38 PM by Simoni »

 

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