Hey! wheres Stevie???

[charlie2008]

I'll tell you. I like Stevie... He's one of the few who didn't bust my balls when I first arrived here.  I read the thread on what started the whole deal, and to the ones who offended him. I'll stand in his place. Attack me....   Stevie don't need my help, but I like the man.  Most of you people would never open your mouth in person, so jump on me.... I'm still here.

[OlgaH]

I like him too. Hope he is OK and we will see him soon 

[charlie2008]

I like him too. Hope he is OK and we will see him soon 

And I like you too Olga, you give good sound advice, and I have never forgotten you either. 

[Shadow]

Charlie, Stevie made two mistakes that probably made him rethink his presence.
First of all he wrote a trip report that was not completely truthful to be more 'conforming'.
Second he seemed to take discussions very personal.

While I like him, and hope he will return to post again, at the same time he seems to need people to like him, and if he does not get what he wants to give up on things. This is something that will not work on internet forums as there is always someone who will try to bust you.

[msmoby_ru]

Charlie, Stevie made two mistakes that probably made him rethink his presence.
First of all he wrote a trip report that was not completely truthful to be more 'conforming'.
Second he seemed to take discussions very personal.

While I like him, and hope he will return to post again, at the same time he seems to need people to like him, and if he does not get what he wants to give up on things. This is something that will not work on internet forums as there is always someone who will try to bust you.

Hey Charlie, if you check back I gave stevie an REAL hard time about how how met his wife, but it doesn't mean I don't miss him, or didn't like him..
No one can be his substitute

Shadow, I missed something - where was Steve less than candid about his trip report ?

[Gator]

Stevie is a very upbeat person.  I like such people if they write with substance, something Stevie did in spades.  I miss him and his departure is a loss to RWD.

I think what led to Stevie’s exit were responses to his advice to a married man attempting to break his wife’s year-long addiction to the computer.  Stevie said the man needs to get his wife tied in with some local activities, not virtual activities, and he suggested “…disconnect your internet.”  An insightful and respected RWD member responded that such was “controlling.”

Stevie’s response was credible, “He's the man of the family and needs to lead her to a solution. He's being too passive it seems. But being simply controlling won't help by itself. They need to find some way, together, to turn the thing off. But she'd obviously have to be part of it, and buy in to it.”

Another respected and insightful RWD member (a RW) then pointed to the large number of RWD posts Stevie had made in a short period  and said Stevie was spending too much time on the Internet at RWD, so maybe someone should cut off his Internet.

The latter response probably reminded Stevie that he had a fantastic wife and he should be spending more time with her and in making money for her, so he wrote:

Somehow I managed to live without this forum for the first 5 years of my marriage, so I think I'll just continue where I left off. Adios! Hope you all continue to enjoy the pleasure you seem to take in insulting each other here. 

He logged out a few minutes later, and has so far remained true to  his word.
 

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=8181.msg149942#msg149942

[Gator]

Shadow, I missed something - where was Steve less than candid about his trip report ?

Mark, this is rich and I assume you will relish it considering your philosophy about meeting only one.  Stevie wrote in trip report that although he had met two RW, he had remained focused on his future wife.

He later admitted without any prompting from RWD members that he met only one RW, his wife.  Evidently his conscience would not let him sleep at night (either that or his wife read the report and did not know he had met another woman :hairraising:).

Whatever, the embellishment was minor in my opinion.

[msmoby_ru]

Mark, this is rich and I assume you will relish it considering your philosophy about meeting only one.  Stevie wrote in trip report that although he had met two RW, he had remained focused on his future wife.

OMG here we go AGAIN, Gator *thinks* he knows what's going on in my head - infers some agenda, or whatever - you don't seem to have learned much from our last spat...

1/ What has how it worked for me - (I learnt long ago, now, Phil not to apply my morals to others..  )  got to do with a SIMPLE question ?

2/ As *I* remember, Stevie told us that he had met a lady - BEFORE his wife to be and had never told her. He was very concerned she would EVER find out.. 

He later admitted without any prompting from RWD members that he met only one RW, his wife.  Evidently his conscience would not let him sleep at night (either that or his wife read the report and did not know he had met another woman :hairraising:).

OK, that's all I needed to know.. Thank you

Whatever, the embellishment was minor in my opinion.

Hmm.. I just hope that his wife would see it that way.... it was clear Stevie adores her and I wish them both all the best !

[Admin]

OMG here we go AGAIN, Gator *thinks* he knows what's going on in my head - infers some agenda, or whatever - you don't seem to have learned much from our last spat...

1/ What has how it worked for me - (I learnt long ago, now, Phil not to apply my morals to others..  )  got to do with a SIMPLE question ?

2/ As *I* remember, Stevie told us that he had met a lady - BEFORE his wife to be and had never told her. He was very concerned she would EVER find out.. 

OK, that's all I needed to know.. Thank you


Hmm.. I just hope that his wife would see it that way.... it was clear Stevie adores her and I wish them both all the best !

Mark,

Nope - we are NOT going down that path. Gator's comments were not intended to incite. Relax and let it go.

As for Stevie - he was/is an optimistic enthusiastic intelligent guy, with limited experience in internet fora. We managed to drive him away, and that is truly unfortunate. It was exactly this sort of argumentative combative confrontational posts that pushed him over the edge.

Maybe (just maybe) we can ALL take a lesson from the loss.

- Dan

[msmoby_ru]

Mark,

Nope - we are NOT going down that path. Gator's comments were not intended to incite. Relax and let it go.

pm'd you

As for Stevie - he was/is an optimistic enthusiastic intelligent guy, with limited experience in internet fora.

Another asumption and Stevie isn't here to "defend" it..

We managed to drive him away, and that is truly unfortunate. It was exactly this sort of argumentative combative confrontational posts that pushed him over the edge.

You can explain this by pm or openly - are you addressing me ? !

Maybe (just maybe) we can ALL take a lesson from the loss.

- Dan

Dan you probably have access to his email - why don't YOU write to him - if you already didn't - Sure he might ignore you, but it might be worth trying..

[Admin]

pm'd you

Another asumption and Stevie isn't here to "defend" it..

You can explain this by pm or openly - are you addressing me ? !

Dan you probably have access to his email - why don't YOU write to him - if you already didn't - Sure he might ignore you, but it might be worth trying..

>>Another asumption and Stevie isn't here to "defend" it..<<

Why are you assuming I am making an assumption? Instead, you might give me the benefit of the doubt and expect that what I wrote is based on fact - which it is. I wrote nothing that Stevie has not evidenced, either in his posts on the forum (optimistic enthusiastic intelligent), or in PM's to me and others (limited experience in internet fora).

>>You can explain this by pm or openly - are you addressing me ? !<<

It was addressed to the collective "we" - and included you Mark, and me too. As a community, we ALL play a part in the loss of a valued member - whether by passivity or activity.

>>Dan you probably have access to his email - why don't YOU write to him - if you already didn't - Sure he might ignore you, but it might be worth trying..<<

I could - I did - Stevie may be back. He is certainly welcome.

- Dan

[charlie2008]

Clearly I'm not Stevies only friend, and is good.  Shadow you may be right, and a little input from admin never hurts either.  And I too hope he comes back rather I'm here or not.  I'm in and out of here.  But understand, if it was anyone of you, and I liked you, (at least I like all who posted so far)  I would stand up in a second for you.  Now if your dead wrong,and you got it comin, then deal with it.  Stevie is Stevie, and I like him for that.  So I'm just gonna let this die unless provoked.  Actually, this board is pretty mellow.  You should see the bb boards where testosterone is so strong you can smell it.  Gator, how the hell are ya? I always luv reading your stuff,lol.         

[KenC]

Steve was a great member here and made a lot of valuable posts in a short period of time.  He was a little PO'd by some guff he got, some from me, and left in a huff.  I spoke with him off board and he was OK.  I told him not to leave, but to take a break and come back when and if he felt like it.  I do think he was embarassed by his minor misleading story telling. More so than necessary.  I enjoyed his posts and hope he comes back.  He was a good guy.
KenC

[AnastassiaAsh]

Is it the same guy who posted "The real truth about my TR..."?

[KenC]

Is it the same guy who posted "The real truth about my TR..."?

yep

[charlie2008]

People dont get me wrong. I'm not a bully. Forget my pic and speak whats on your mind. It's not really fitting for the board and I may pull it anyway.  Im proud of my accomplishments, but its my words I want you to hear.  Muscle only looks good when you can carry it with some class, and I have none whatsoever.

[mark2353]

Charlie, I agree with you i do miss Steve he has a certain way of writing his message that is unique and never read anyone else who adores his wife more than this guy! I hope he does come back!
I also think that you are putting yourself a little down! I believe that you have quite of bit of class by simply opening up this Steve or story! You are correct at times the muscle requires class to make it shine! I believe that you have a lot of class! 
I hope you have a great trip,
have a great trip, Mark 

[charlie2008]

Charlie, I agree with you i do miss Steve he has a certain way of writing his message that is unique and never read anyone else who adores his wife more than this guy! I hope he does come back!
I also think that you are putting yourself a little down! I believe that you have quite of bit of class by simply opening up this Steve or story! You are correct at times the muscle requires class to make it shine! I believe that you have a lot of class! 
I hope you have a great trip,
have a great trip, Mark 

Mark, Iv'e been  so used to giving and protecting  in so many areas, I forgot what it feels like to get something in return. ( at least from another man)  Thank you for the compliment.  It feels good bro...

[msmoby_ru]

>>Another asumption and Stevie isn't here to "defend" it..<<

I DID say another asssumption - I notice you didn't refer to the first one. Your claiming Gator wasn't "inciting" with his a "bit rich" comment ( when he clearly was)  ...

Dan,you have a habit of asking members to accept what you say is "fact" (and getting upset if we don't) which is understandable!

So can you understand why this member is "upset" as your clearly seem allow "favourites" latitute with impunity..

OK, said, it .. IF anyone can persuade Stevie back, that would be great !

[Admin]

I DID say another asssumption - I notice you didn't refer to the first one. Your claiming Gator wasn't "inciting" with his a "bit rich" comment ( when he clearly was)  ...

Dan,you have a habit of asking members to accept what you say is "fact" (and getting upset if we don't) which is understandable!

So can you understand why this member is "upset" as your clearly seem allow "favourites" latitute with impunity..

OK, said, it .. IF anyone can persuade Stevie back, that would be great !

Mark,

>>Dan,you have a habit of asking members to accept what you say is "fact" (and getting upset if we don't) which is understandable!<<

I see it a bit differently. Firstly, what you claim is a "habit" is, in fact, only two topics. Maybe coincidentally, you have participated in both of those same topics. As for "asking members to accept what you {I} say is 'fact' " - sure, I think we ALL ought to give others the benefit of the doubt and to some extent, I expect it from others (though it doesn't surprise me when I don't receive that courtesy). The other thing I believe is important is to not make assumptions. Far better would be to make a simple request for clarification.

>>So can you understand why this member is "upset" as your clearly seem allow "favourites" latitute with impunity..<<

No Mark, no one has "impunity" - though I have a pretty good idea of some member's motives and behavior patterns just by having observed them in past exchanges.

>>OK, said, it .. IF anyone can persuade Stevie back, that would be great !<<

Agreed.

- Dan

[msmoby_ru]

Mark,

>>Dan,you have a habit of asking members to accept what you say is "fact" (and getting upset if we don't) which is understandable!<<

I see it a bit differently. Firstly, what you claim is a "habit" is, in fact, only two topics.

Dan, two RECENT topics .. it is a pattern - I ask YOU to accept my observations - "do you see how it "sounds" ?

Maybe coincidentally, you have participated in both of those same topics. As for "asking members to accept what you {I} say is 'fact' " - sure, I think we ALL ought to give others the benefit of the doubt and to some extent, I expect it from others (though it doesn't surprise me when I don't receive that courtesy). The other thing I believe is important is to not make assumptions.

Fine - so How would you explain your "knowing" Gator's comment "bit rich" wasn't inciting, when all I asked for was an explanation about Stevie - WITHOUT the "lecture".. ?!

Far better would be to make a simple request for clarification./quote]

Ah, OK... Gator - could you please explain what you meant  by this statement - as I was only asking about stevie changing his story....

>>So can you understand why this member is "upset" as your clearly seem allow "favourites" latitute with impunity..<<

No Mark, no one has "impunity" - though I have a pretty good idea of some member's motives and behavior patterns just by having observed them in past exchanges.

Could you clarify this statement, please?

>>OK, said, it .. IF anyone can persuade Stevie back, that would be great !<<

Agreed.

- Dan

I hope your emailing Stevie will produce some results.

[groovlstk]

I DID say another asssumption - I notice you didn't refer to the first one. Your claiming Gator wasn't "inciting" with his a "bit rich" comment ( when he clearly was)  ...

Maybe there's a word usage issue here, but I saw gator's comments as giving props to you, Mark. Not trying to incite you.

[Gator]

Maybe there's a word usage issue here, but I saw gator's comments as giving props to you, Mark. Not trying to incite you.

Exactly, thanks!  Somehow I would like to retrieve those props.  Maybe I can make it moot with this post.

Your claiming Gator wasn't "inciting" with his a "bit rich" comment ( when he clearly was)  ...

Mark,

I was not attempting to incite you.  In fact, I went out of my way to give you a thorough answer to your question.

Reading my whole post would reveal that I was not taking any position regarding an issue. 

Stevie has the same WOVO philosophy as you.  I was applauding Stevie.  So how could that spill negative stuff on you?  Maybe you should read Stevie's confession.

My use of the term "rich" was positive as showing a combination of high values and amusing sense of honesty.  Is the term "rich" ever used in a negative way to incite someone other than in a sarcastic tone which could be conveyed only in speaking and not in writing?

You wrote that I was lecturing you.  The following is how I lecture someone: 

Your accusation  "( when he clearly was)" is one of the following:

- a manifestation of your argumentative nature; not having an argument you attempted to start one and succeeded somewhat with Dan (so you must be having a good day while the rest of us are irritated),

- pure stupidity in your decision to go with the 1% probability that I was lecturing you rather than the 99% probability that I was answering your question,

- paranoia,

- or a reflection of some other psychological disorder of an unknown origin.

It is apparent that time away from RWD did not kill the bug up your ass.  You were a  waste of time in the past, a waste of time today, and will remain a waste of time in the future unless you change.

I have given you some answers in the past only to have you spit in my face.  Never expect me to answer your questions in the future.  In fact, I would be happy if you just went away.   Oddly, I have never expressed such at any time on any forum.  Congratulations!

[Admin]

Dan, two RECENT topics .. it is a pattern - I ask YOU to accept my observations - "do you see how it "sounds" ?

Fine - so How would you explain your "knowing" Gator's comment "bit rich" wasn't inciting, when all I asked for was an explanation about Stevie - WITHOUT the "lecture".. ?!

Could you clarify this statement, please?

I hope your emailing Stevie will produce some results.

>>Dan, two RECENT topics .. it is a pattern - I ask YOU to accept my observations - "do you see how it "sounds" ?<<

Sure, I accept how it sounds. Doesn't make it fact. Two data points, out of hundreds (thousands?) is hardly a trend line. If that is what it seems to you - OK. I am not feeling inspired to change your mind.

>>Fine - so How would you explain your "knowing" Gator's comment "bit rich" wasn't inciting, when all I asked for was an explanation about Stevie - WITHOUT the "lecture".. ?!<<

Like groov, I saw no malice whatsoever in Gator's comment to you. Perhaps there is some small language quirk that led you to interpret otherwise, but having seen Gator participate actively for many years, I know him to be one of the most positive and helpful members on the 'net.

>>Could you clarify this statement, please?<<

Sure - as I explained above about Gator's pattern of being optimistic and helpful - Mark, candidly, your posts are frequently very 'edgy'. You seem to take offense easily and are argumentative. Not always, but a very large proportion of the time.

Those patterns of behavior most certainly influence the 'filter' I apply when I see what someone writes. When that pattern is one of combative behavior, I quickly notice the hints and glimpses that foretell the next conflagration.

In the case of Gator's most recent response to you, I see him acting WAY out of character, in response to what he feels (and I concur, BTW) was an unnecessary provocation.

Does that help you to understand my comments Mark?

- Dan

[msmoby_ru]

Maybe there's a word usage issue here, but I saw gator's comments as giving props to you, Mark. Not trying to incite you.

Hi Groovlstk ..

Well, I have read this post of yours and Dans's and even Gator's that follows and I can only say that I am TOTALLY confused... It reads rather differently to me in MY form of English ...

It sounded to me like Gator was thinking that I would be glad to see a WMVM trip "fail" .. as it would "prove my case" .....




I find myself having to UNRESERVEDLY APOLOGISE to Gator for having misunderstood what he was saying ..