Russia in Winter

[bobb]

PRELUDE

It was maybe 15 years ago, when I was 45, the first inkling of finding a Russian woman to marry entered my mind.  This was back in the Cambrian era when the only communication was by snail mail.  I decided upon one woman, not having any idea to consider more than one out of ignorance, wrote a letter and included a few photos.  Three months later I received a reply.  Hmmm...This isn't going to cut it for me I realized. 

In February 2003 the modern age had been around for a few years and I decided to try again.  I soon found out this was to my liking.  Two to three emails a week and phone calls.  I did a lot of research and also found the first incarnation of this board back then. 

I went to Belarus once and Ukraine five times between May 2003 and April 2005.  My style was WOVO with a backup plan.  I only ask during my tale this thread does not get hijacked into a discussion of the merits of this approach.  Different strokes for different folks. 

I met three women during these past visits - all very different.  All three were as their photos suggested.  All were between 6-8 years younger than me.  None of these ended up going anywhere.  I was cautiously optimistic with two and the other was a mistake to have even gone to see her.  Looking back I think I met a very sincere woman who loved me greatly before I even arrived, the other wanted me to spend and spend some more on her, while the final woman was more interested in joining her daughter, who had won the green card lottery a few years earlier.  They were all nice women but they just weren't the right one for me.  I didn't start learning some basic Russian until halfway through my quest.  In hindsight I wish I would have started learning earlier.   

At this point I questioned if I was really capable of doing this some more.  I decided no and didn't think I would ever attempt this again.

In July of last year, before taking a short golf trip up into Canada, on a whim, I went back to the very first site I used where I'd met Olga in 2003 - EM.  To my amazement I still had two credits to begin correspondence with.  I looked around and began and ended three (I thought you said two credits.  I know, I know, I was hooked again.  I paid more to continue) conversations in the space of four weeks; all for different reasons.  After returning from Canada I took some photos of the current me and added a photo from April 2008.  I added text in the photos with the dates of the photos so the women would understand they were current.  I have always looked much younger than my age.

Then on September 2nd I received an email from L.  I was stunned.  It instantly grabbed my attention.  Here was a woman who was speaking, in general terms, to my heart.  I have never at any time in my life heard a woman express their desires and thoughts so clearly and in such simple terms.  I replied with a similar type of letter, from my heart, which I had translated, so she would ‘hear’ accurately what I was saying.

I have never forgotten a line in a song from the Eagles, ‘Love without passion, is like no love at all’.  I have never willing to ‘settle’.  After my earlier trips and contemplation since those trips I felt I understood what is necessary in this process, increased my understanding of who I am, what I truly want, and what I am capable of providing.

In our continuing correspondence I have never in my life heard a woman express her thoughts and feelings so completely, honestly, and so poetically.  She inspired me to reply in kind.  I never knew I had the ability to so richly describe my growing thoughts and feelings.  It is as if we are on the same wavelength.  I dusted off my Russian from the past and began studying again.  I was overwhelmed.  Everything I did caused me to think o her.  It is the same with her.  We both have commented we have to hold our happiness in at work, or our coworkers will think we are losing it.

We decided to meet in St Petersburg in October 2008.  If you wish to read something about that trip in a post I made when returning to this board you can... 
Click here! (
While still in St Petersburg I made my air reservations to visit L in her home town in the middle of January 2009.

If anyone knows how to insert an image in places inside the body of a post I would appreciate instructions.  I think this can only be done if you reference a URL.  I can attach the photos, I will be inserting at the bottom of each post, as I have done with this post.  But, it would be nicer if I could insert just below where I mention something.  I don't like posting them to my Picasa web albums because I usually delete those after a period of time.  Ah well, I will see what suggestions are offered.

I tried to attach two two photos with the additional options but every time I tried and then clicked on Post it just kept hanging and hanging and never posting.  Maybe I'll try the photos in a separate post.

TO BE CONTINUED...

[bobb]

On Wednesday January 14th after work I drive 3 hours to some friends in San Francisco.  I awake at 5:30 and Dave takes me to SFO arriving around 7:30 for my 9:40 flight on American to Chicago.  I have put my large piece of luggage inside a bigger piece of luggage I would be leaving with L.  I had read many years ago this was a good way to get a big piece of luggage to Russia for L to use when she comes here.  Around the holidays I made a killing on some two big pieces of luggage.  I will do the same when I go back this summer to bring her to her new home.
Photo

On international flights you are allowed, no cost, two pieces of luggage weighing up to 50 lbs and the total of all three dimensions is 62 inches (at least on American).  If more than 50 lbs you have to pay an additional $50.  At check-in at SFO before you get to the counter they have a scale you put your luggage on for international flights.  The checker says fine at 50.1 lbs.  I didn’t have to put a couple things in my carry-on, which I could have.  Some people behind me actually did that very thing.  I also had a hunch those same people would be on the flight to Moscow with me.  It turns out I was right.  I could hear them speaking a little Russian.  The flight, on a 767, leaves on time and arrives early.  I suspect this is the same plane to Moscow as we park at the same gate I will be leaving from.  I’ve flown a lot.  I think the 767 has the narrowest aisles, and they are crooked.


The flight is delayed because problems with the galley doors - maybe because it was so cold in Chicago (-9).  We start boarding an hour late and are ready to leave when they decide to hold the plane for a few passengers just arriving on another flight.  About an hour later we are off.  We gain time on the flight so I’m not concerned.  For the first time in a long time I actually talk a good deal with the person sitting next to me.  She is a 25 year old woman from Russia – Kurgan.  This was her fourth time to the U.S.  She works for an agricultural company and has been in Pennsylvania and South Dakota.  She speaks very good English and it was enjoyable talking with her.  She was obviously interested when I mention why I’m going to Russia to see my fiancée and I show her some photos of L.  Her first visit to the U.S. years ago was as an exchange student in Missouri. 

The flight arrives in Moscow at Domodedovo (DME) almost 2 hours late.  After going through customs and exchanging a $100 for rubles I wait for my luggage.  It takes me about 10-15 minutes to realize a couple people pulling luggage off the carousel were workers from the airport.  At first I thought they were with some large group as they were looking at the airline luggage tags.  Then I realized they were just workers after the pile of luggage had grown tremendously.  I walked over and found my ‘double’ suitcase, which appeared to have been one of the first pulled off.  I probably should have mentioned this to some other Americans waiting for their luggage, but I was anxious to see L.  As I exit customs about 45 minutes after the plane lands L is waiting for me.  She calls my name –“Robert” – and she scurries along outside the ropes until I emerge right next to her.  It is like no time has elapsed since we last saw each other 13 weeks ago.  Her smile and warmth are visible and her affection is quite apparent.

We had decided ahead of time to take a taxi across town to Kazinski railway station.  We could have flown on Izhevia air but I thought it would be a wonderful experience to share a train ride with L.  It was also much cheaper.  L speaks to one of the vultures, waiting for people like us, offering taxi services at the end of the gauntlet.  After reading some information elsewhere, before my trip, I think we paid a little too much for the taxi to Kazinski railway station - $50.  I had read to the center of town should be around $25.  Maybe to Kazinski station $10-15 more I’m guessing.  I wasn’t going to say anything as it wasn’t outrageously unreasonable.

I didn’t even say anything when we have to pull over and get out near a Metro stop as the roadways become choked with cars.  What an ordeal this is lugging the 50.1 lb. beast along.  Sure, there is a long escalator we descend into the bowels of the metro, but from there it is up and down three different levels, changing trains, and no escalators…wait, maybe one other escalator.  When we finally arrive at Kazinski station I’m over-heated and happy to be somewhere to stop and catch my breath. 

We have almost an hour and a half before the train leaves at 5:38 for Izhevsk (E-zhevsk).  Izhevsk is about 700 miles east of Moscow with a population of over 700,000.  Andrei Kirilinko of the Utah Jazz is from Izhevsk.  L stays with the luggage and I wonder over to practice my Russian skills in buying some water.  Not a true test, but a beginning.  After a successful purchase I return and see L talking with a woman.  It turns out this is a very good friend of hers, Lena, who lives in Helsinki but also works in St Petersburg and Moscow sometimes.  It’s a relief as Lena can speak good English, so I don’t feel left out.  L even tells me, later in Izhevsk, she thinks Lena will be able to come to our wedding.  Then a male friend of Lena’s, who is a famous journalist in Moscow, meets us as we prepare to board the train.  I immediately think of the unfortunate journalists from Moscow who have suddenly died in the past few years.  They both follow us onto the train and spend some time with us.  We return to the boarding platform to continue our conversations until just before the train leaves.  The weather?  It’s cool, a little below freezing, and overcast.

We share a four person carriage with a woman and a man (not together) with four beds (bunk beds).  There is no place to store my large double suitcase so we put it on top, at the foot, of L’s bed (lower).  I will sleep in the upper.  It is dark when we leave, and has been for almost two hours.  By 7:00 I’m asleep.  It is warm and I don’t even need the thin sheet or blanket that was provided.  I wake up in the very early morning, I think it was around 1:00 or so and go down to L and wake her gently.  We snuggle and kiss for awhile, and then I go back upstairs and sleep some more. 

TO BE CONTINUED

[bobb]

At this time of year the sun is rising after 8:30 and setting shortly after 4:00.  When we arrive in Izhevsk, sometime after 10:00, it is sunny and cold.  Her son, V (32), and a friend with a car meet us to drive us back to her apartment.  L lives on the 4th floor (top floor) of the typical Russian apartment building from the 50’s and 60’s, with no elevator.  A very good location as it is close to the center and her work.  V carries the monster up the staircase and makes a comment about how heavy the ‘suitcase’ is.  I’m sure he’s thinking I’m crazy to have brought so many clothes and another smaller piece of luggage.  He can speak some English and we can communicate somewhat.  When I open it later and show him the one inside the bigger one he then understands. 

V has been looking forward to meeting me.  L has told him a great deal about me and he can hear in the background our daily (twice a day phone conversations).  He has been able to hear the laughter and the love in L’s voice when we talk.  When we do talk we each speak some English and some Russian.  They are not long conversations – 10 to 15 minutes – but it is just the constant contact which means a great deal to L.  It always puts her in a good mood to start the day.   I wouldn’t see V a great deal during my visit but we did spend enough time for us to get to know each other somewhat.  For most of my visit V worked, spent time with friends in the evening, and slept.  When I did leave V and I were very comfortable with each other.  I felt he saw the genuine love L and I have for each other and how we were together.  He would like to eventually start a sports related business.  Right now he is working two jobs.   

L’s apartment has two bedrooms, living room, small hallway, toilet room, a room with a tub and sink, and a small cozy kitchen.  She also has a parrot (what you would think of as a parakeet – as there is really no such species as a parakeet – it’s a North American term.).  As usual all space heating is the hot water heating through radiators.  It is always a constant temperature inside.  Never cold, never hot.  L has been slowly remodeling her apartment in preparation to sell and buy two smaller ones; one for V and one to rent.  That may not happen now until sometime after she has moved to the U.S.  There is new flooring in the kitchen, hallway, and V’s bedroom.  All ceilings, except hallways and living room had been painted.  A new ceiling had been installed in V’s room.  It’s a kind of drop ceiling, but like nothing I’ve ever seen anywhere.  It’s a solid thin plastic than you can’t see any seams.  While I was there some worker’s installed the same ceiling in the hallways and the living room in one day. 

Instead of trying to describe what happened day by day I am going to just describe events and activities such as all the meetings with her family and mention days while I do this.  This is very different from many trip reports in there are no parents to meet and siblings and their wives are very important.

 I take a nap before my first meeting with her two younger brothers (55 and 52) and their wives the first day I’m in Izehvsk, S&K and S&T.  They will arrive shortly after 3:00.  I’m guessing they are chomping at the bit to meet this guy who wants to take L half way around the world from them.  It’s actually about 6 degrees shy of halfway around the world.  It sure makes it convenient though with the time difference being 12 hours exactly.  No mental calculations needed – my only conversion is night or day!

They arrive all bundled up in heavy jackets, scarves, gloves, and hats.  It’s going to be a cold night tonight I am told – as low as -25C.  I think they say this on purpose to see my reaction to such cold temperatures.  Before I visited I had informed L I have lived in the Colorado Rockies and I have ample clothes to be warm.  I was going to borrow my brother-in-laws Sorrels, but they bought me these insulated boots that are rated to -40 F/-40C.  These were the only ‘shoes’ I brought with me.  I had lots of capilene underwear and tops for a great first layer.  They all take their insulated boots off and put on house slippers provided by L.  All homes/apartments in Russia are like this.  There is a little stand with several pairs of slippers for guests to wear.  This is even practiced in warm weather.  I believe the practice began for many reasons - One very practical reason being the amount of dirt on the streets and sidewalks.  Another reason is to prolong the life of the surfaces inside homes.  If they kept their shoes on, like we do in America, they would have to replace their flooring much more often.  They don’t have the funds to do this.  I have only seen wood or the new plastic wood looking flooring, with rugs on any of my trips to the former Soviet Union.  I have never seen a home/apartment with carpeting.  I’m sure they exist, just not like we are used to. 

L’s brothers and wives have brought some food, L has made some food and we all gather around a table in L’s bedroom.  Two of us sit on L’s futon bed and the other four on chairs/short stools.  A very typical seating arrangement in many gatherings I will encounter.  Some more fancy than others.  I can speak a little Russian but not enough to have a regular conversation.  There is no way I can understand what they are saying in normal conversation.  One brother can say a few things in Russian. 

Several times her brothers want to smoke so I go with them outside the apartment to the mid landing between the floors.  The window is cracked open a bit and the smoking is done in the stairwell.  There was never any smoking in any home/apartment I visited.  If anyone smoked they went out to the stairwells or outside.  It seemed like most of the men in Russia smoke and most women do not, at least in Izhevsk from what I saw.  At least women over the age of 40. 

It’s like a faint memory to me right now how we managed to spend a few hours together and it was not uncomfortable at all.  I guess I was able to communicate enough to L with her limited knowledge of English and my small Russian for her to answer some basic questions.  I really just have no idea how the time went by.  They could see my smile, good nature and the obvious affection L and I showed towards each other.  I don’t know if they were surprised at the Russian I could say or not.  They were all very nice and smiled and laughed like anyone else in the world.  Just before preparing to leave I give each of them a short three paragraph letter to read.  I had written this, translated using Google, and sent to L for her to edit so it was more accurate Russian.  She sent it back to me with the edits and corrections and I printed copies out and brought with me.

L and I are in Love.  I know you are nervous about me.  That is understandable because you do not know me yet.  You do know L.  You trust L.  You will see with your own eyes how we both love each other during my stay in your wonderful city.  Observe our interaction when you see us together and decide with your eyes and your hearts. 

I know you will be sad when L moves to America.  Yes, she will not be available in person.  But, she will call you on the telephone.  She will write you emails.  Over time we will arrange to have you communicate with Luba over the Internet with webcams.  L and I will return for visits.   

L and I have very similar ‘spirits’.  My only goal in life now is to make L happy; to love and to care for her.  I will always do whatever it takes to help her in her new life in America.  She will be accepted and loved instantly by all in my family.  They will also be there to help her in America.  I will always support her in whatever she wishes to do. 

TO BE CONTINUED...

[bobb]

The next day, Sunday, S&K arrive at L’s around 2:00 in a taxi.  We take a short ride to her older brother’s house S&T for dinner.  Joining us was one of Slava’s two daughters, T with her husband S.  S&T’s other daughter, I, is not in town.  In Russia ‘dinner’ is what we call ‘lunch’ and on weekends is the main meal of the day - more towards the middle to late afternoon.  Their home was bigger than L’s, and much newer being no older than 8-10 years.  Like single mothers everywhere in the world L’s home was more modest than a family with both husband and wife living together, and both working.  Their kitchen had cupboards and was more than twice the size of L’s.  There was so much food and it was all good.  I stuff myself, eating much more than I normally would eat.  I just wish they would let me serve my own portions.  Ah well, no sense in saying anything as it would probably be misunderstood if I did try to communicate I wished smaller amounts.   

As it is beginning to darken we go out outside with a small metal sleigh.  This thing is tiny.  They all inspect my ‘parka’ and can’t believe it will keep me warm.  They have trouble believing something so thin can be warm.  This parka, although nice and thin, kept me toasty at all times.  If my parka was too thin I think they feel my boots are overkill.  L shows them how insulated they are.  We stroll a bit to the woods and take turns riding down a hill.  It was fun, cold, and there was a lot of laughter.  On the way back to the home we stop at a small shed where S pays to have a large water jug filled with spring water.  I’m sure I was being analyzed by her family on this little jaunt but it wasn’t obvious or uncomfortable.  Looking back on all my interactions with L’s family and friends I was never self-conscious or did I try to be anything other than the person I am.  Sure, I was a little nervous at times, and wondering what was said sometimes, but by and large I didn’t think about what was being said, if I couldn’t understand.  There was a great deal of smiles from everyone, which I took as a good sign. 

On Wednesday, early evening, we walk to S&K’s home – maybe a half hour walk.  Whenever we would walk, which was most of the time when we went anywhere, I would kick my feet through very light powder anywhere from 1-2 feet deep.  The snow is everywhere.  I mean everywhere.  There was sun on my first two days in Izhevsk, but then it disappeared, not to be seen again until I was in a plane above the clouds.  The snow just gets packed down, blown around, pushed aside, and evaporates on main streets because of vehicles.

The main streets get plowed.  The semi-main streets just get cleared eventually by use.  The lanes just become packed snow.  The art of driving in snow is a skill.  We did pass by a few accidents when we were walking some days.  There is also an interesting condition with lights I have experienced in the FSU.  When you are at a red light the orange light will also come on a second or two before the green appears.  Being less timid drivers than many Americans this is an advantage.   

Sometimes when walking I would release L’s hand and take a few steps and try to slide.  I’m sure anyone looking must have thought I was crazy!  When the wind wasn’t blowing it was actually enjoyable walking around in these conditions.  My head was down a lot at other times because of the weather conditions and how bundled up I was.

S&T join us at S&K’s shortly after we arrive.   Ig, one son, sleeps in his bedroom during my entire visit and I meet A, the other son, after he returns home from work.  S&K’s home was the newest.  I would say less than 5 years old.  Wow was there a lot of food, and more food.  I was finally able to add the words small when offered seconds, which helped.  S had a bottle of Cognac.  I’m not a drinker but I drank this time.  L told S to give me small portions after the first two.  Every so often S would pour the Cognac in these tiny little silver glasses.  Then there would be a quick toast, down the Cognac, and a small square of chocolate to finish the experience.  I didn’t really like the taste, but I really liked the camaraderie I enjoyed with her two brothers when we did this little ritual.  Every 30 to 40 minutes I the three of us would put on our parka’s and step out onto the balcony so they could smoke their cigarettes.  There was a 5 lb coffee can that was almost stuffed with butts.  We would look out over the snow and a park between the buildings.   

After eating we play a Russian board game.  It’s a fun game and gives me a chance to practice my knowledge of Russian numbers.  Small barrel shaped tokens would be pulled from a bag (numbers 1-90).  L on one side and T on the other were watching me to see if I recognized the number.  Many numbers I could recognize right away and others I had to think too long on.  The easiest were from 1 – 49.  From 50 - 90 were more difficult.  It’s those slight difference in endings for 50’s and 60’s compared to 70’s and 80’s, but those are still long.  Then you have 90’s which make no sense to an American.  It was a good lesson for me though.  S started to show me the numbers as he called them out.  When it came my turn to pull numbers I passed.  It was a fun time playing the game.  My family has always played many different board and card games throughout my whole life and I could see L would enjoy when we played games after she is here.  When I return to Izhevsk in the summer I will buy the cards and tokens for that game and bring here.  My family will enjoy playing it with us. 

After the game S connects a microphone to his sound system and puts a Karaoke DVD on his TV.  The DVD has songs In Russian, Ukrainian, and even English.  This is the first time I have ever participated in Karaoke in my life.  I feel sorry for them having to listen to my singing.  When singing I am tone deaf.  My best score was 76 and on two others I didn’t even do good enough to rate a score.  L has a very nice singing voice and S did the best for accuracy.  S&K walked the four of us out to a bus stop.  I could manage to hand the ticket collector on the bus the 10 rubles by myself.  I think the only thing that really made me stand out was my blue parka and if someone heard me speak English.  After two stops we parted ways with S&T.  Tonight was a working night and we were back at L’s shortly after 8:00. 

TO BE CONTINUED...

[Kuna]

Bob,

Enjoying the TR very much... and looking forward to reading more...

[Diplomacy]

Great TR Bob, looking forward to hearing more.

[SANDRO43]

After eating we play a Russian board game.  It’s a fun game and gives me a chance to practice my knowledge of Russian numbers.  Small barrel shaped tokens would be pulled from a bag (numbers 1-90).  L on one side and T on the other were watching me to see if I recognized the number.  Many numbers I could recognize right away and others I had to think too long on.  The easiest were from 1 – 49.  From 50 - 90 were more difficult.  It’s those slight difference in endings for 50’s and 60’s compared to 70’s and 80’s, but those are still long.  Then you have 90’s which make no sense to an American.

Isn't that a sort of Bingo?

[OlgaH]

Isn't that a sort of Bingo?

I guess it's so. We call this game лото (loto) 

[SANDRO43]

I guess it's so. We call this game лото (loto)

Which is LOTTO elsewhere, presumably from lottery (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lottery) and originally from Cleromancy (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cleromancy), i.e. to draw lots.

Our Lotto is a twice-weekly national lottery particularly popular in Naples where they developed over time the Smorfia, i.e. the art of assigning numbers to real events or dreams. For instance, 90 is la paura (fright), 48 morto che parla (dead man talking), 77 le gambe delle donne (women's legs), etc. etc.

The household-game version here is called Tombola. The winner of the pot is who first scores a cinquina, i.e. has 5 of the drawn numbers on his card(s).

[OlgaH]

For instance, 90 is la paura (fright), 49 morto che parla (dead man talking), 77 le gambe delle donne (women's legs), etc.

Yes, Sandro, we also have the names for numbers  77 - toporiki (hatchets or axes), 90 - dedushka (grandpa), 11 - barabannye palochki (drumsticks), 22 - utyata (ducklings)...

[SANDRO43]

77 - toporiki (hatchets or axes)

I prefer the Neapolitan interpretation . Here's a page in Italian with the meaning of the first 30 numbers: http://www.portanapoli.com/Ita/Cultura/smorfia_napoletana_1.html.

Interesting is the description of 6: chella ca guarda 'nterra (It.: la cosa che guarda in terra) - what looks earthwards .

[bobb]

It is interesting how the game was played.  If someone covered their five numbers in the first row everyone had to put in another ante.  If the second row's five numbers were covered that person took money from the pot.  I wasn't sure how much, less than 50% I'm pretty sure.  If two people at the same time covered a row nothing happened.  The game ended when the third row of five numbers was covered by only one person.  One game the first row was covered five separate times.  I think I ended up winning that game!

[bobb]

I see S, K, S, and T a few more brief times before my final night on Saturday.  Late Saturday afternoon all four arrive at L’s.  L has been spending all afternoon cooking different foods with me helping…as much as she would let me help.  One of the dishes she cooks is a Belarusian dish – draliki.  In St Petersburg L let me actually cook sometimes and let me help when we cleaned up the dishes.  At her home she would shoo me out of the kitchen.  I kept asking and saying I wanted to help but she would not let me help most of the time.  On Friday we brought home a frozen fish.  After it thaws L asks me to help cut it apart.  She hands me a regular knife.  Are you kidding me I think to myself!  What a chore that was.  The next morning we stop at a ‘household’ store where I purchase a good ‘sharp’ knife for her.  I’m not a slob and I keep a neat house.  At L’s I would always pick up after myself offered to help.  She liked it when I made the bed every night and put away the bedding in the morning, but she would not let me help in the kitchen like I wanted to.

I think I must have gained about 5 pounds during my visit with all the food I ate.  The food was always so good and tasty.  I’ve even come to really enjoy Russian salads, at least if they aren’t buried in mayonnaise.  The salads are so different than salads here with so much lettuce.  Before dinner S shows me a movie he took on his digital camera earlier that day at work.  He is a driver for an oil company.  What he drives is a big rig that has a boom.  Today he had attached to the boom some big steel structure he was maneuvering around.  In separate photos he zoomed in when viewing the photo on the LCD.  I could tell he worked hard as he was a very fit 52 year old man.  He had a good nature and probably smiled the most of all her family.  He was the one who could speak the most English, after L and V. 

That evening after we finish eating we go into V’s room and use his computer.  I go to my web albums on Picasa and show them all photos of L and I in one album, and St Petersburg photos from my trip in October in another album.  L brings out CD’s I sent to her with movies I made of walking around my house and my sister’s much bigger house at Thanksgiving.  I could only imagine their thoughts at the size of our houses and everything in them, although my house is somewhat Spartan compared to many houses.  I was actually embarrassed at showing them these movies.  The final movies were of walking around a small area of Bidwell Park in my City and the campus at the university.   

I then open two Google translate windows and we have somewhat of a conversation.  L types questions in Russian and Google translates, I answer and Google translates.  Obviously the sentences are basic and short, but you can have a conversation this way.  There were many good questions and it is nice to be able to answer them for her family.  Some questions are obviously related somewhat to L leaving Izhevsk.  One question from T, after learning it would be sometime until L could find a job, said she thought she would be bored at home all day with no friends.  L will have no problem making friends.  It is obvious to me based on seeing her on this trip with her family and friends.  L is a much loved person.  I explained to them L will call on the phone, email everyone, and each home has a computer so we will setup Skype so everyone can keep in contact for free.  They also wanted to know how often L could visit Russia.  I guessed about every 9 months to 1 year. 

After our ‘conversation’ on the computer we play the lotto again.  Tonight I take my turn and call out the numbers.  I’m bad trying to quickly say the numbers 50 – 90, but I show the numbers so everyone can see them as I call them out.  Another great time with the family.  Even though S has to work the next day they stay until close to 10:00.  It takes several minutes in this type of climate for everyone to put on boots, scarves, coats, hats, and gloves.  After everyone has bundled up I receive the ‘official’ acceptance into the family with the three cheek kiss and hug from everyone.  T even says I am family now.  Great, I can start saying Privyet in greetings!  They all wish me a safe journey the next day.

TO BE CONTINUED

[OlgaH]

I prefer the Neapolitan interpretation . Here's a page in Italian with the meaning of the first 30 numbers: http://www.portanapoli.com/Ita/Cultura/smorfia_napoletana_1.html.

13 - Sant'Antonio, in Russia - devil's dozen 

Interesting is the description of 6: chella ca guarda 'nterra (It.: la cosa che guarda in terra) - what looks earthwards .

  

[bobb]

Interlude – Learning Russian.

Years ago when visiting Ukraine I had begun to learn some basic Russian - Enough to be polite and very limited.  After beginning my correspondence with L I began again.  Previously, and again now, I first concentrated on learning how to say the correct sounds for the Russian alphabet.  I don't think I'll never get the hang of rolling the r's, such as in Spanish.  Many times when listening to a CD I will pay more attention to the small difference in pronouncing similar letters than in what the actual word was.  Years ago and on this trip I've been complimented on my good pronunciation.  This time I am determined to learn more and I have been studying regularly.  It has also been very helpful as L and I talk often.  My vocabulary has slowly built up. 

While learning I was introduced to the concept of syllabification in “Scahum’s Outlines - Russian Grammar”.  Most of the time syllables break at a vowel.  For all I know this also occurs in English.  The exception is with certain consonant clusters.  English was my weakest subject when learning many moons ago.  So, it has been more difficult to learn all the different endings and different ways to say the same word with nouns, pronouns, verbs, and adjectives.  It's a slow process to learn all the different ways to say my…such as my wife, my brother, my cat (male or female cat are different), my etc. if the noun is considered neuter.  Aiyiyiyiyiyiyi!  It will slowly come in time…I hope.  At times I think I am maybe spending too much time on the very basics, but I think this will help me in the long run.  I have read if a person studies intently on these basics breakthroughs come quickly later on.

The real fun times are when you see something written in a cursive script.  Now all of a sudden there are new looking letters instead of printed looking letters. 
Examples:  Lowercase и becomes u, т becomes m, lowercase M is more cursive and could easily be confused with lowercase т.  Uppercase T is weird.  When I first saw these differences I was really confused.
 
I feel I have a better understanding now of where a Russian has problems learning certain sounds in English.  Both languages have sounds that are not spoken, or spoken rarely, in the other's language.  For instance Russian has no sound for W, and there have been a few different ways to attempt to make this sound with one or a combination of a couple Russian letters.
 
weekend – уик-энд
William – Вильям/Уильям
And J
John – Джон

Many times these are basically with names of places or people, and also of terms such as weekend borrowed from other languages.

I have read Russian has very few words when any letter is silent.  So, when learning English it is common to hear the ending e in many words, where the e is silent…such as house (housa or houza).  When I talk to L I don't even teach her not to pronounce the e.  That will only come in time after she is here and will just learn when some letters have no sound – just like we learned.  I can't imagine there is any English grammar rule that teaches one this.

The Russian letter that gives me the most trouble is X.  In some words it can sound like an H and others the ch sound as in loch.  I'm starting to feel comfortable with the voicing rules with paired voiced and voiceless consonants, at least when a voiced consonant is at the end of a word.  I still haven't figured out why the г in сегодня is pronounced like В (v).  It's fun trying to learn Russian and there can be much laughter in saying simple sentences with the wrong endings because of tense.  But, I can be understood. 

I know many people undertaking this feel it is a waste of time to try and learn Russian.  The argument goes she will need to speak English when arriving here and how often will you visit Russia.  I'll just say I disagree with that thinking.  I am sure others have noticed the true appreciation from your SO when you have taken your time to learn some Russian.  Most likely I will never be able to have a ‘deep’ conversation in Russian with anyone.  But, I think it may be one of those little things that help for a successful relationship.

I can appreciate the fact Russian is a rich language and a one for one translation is not necessarily exact.  I understand one word in Russian can mean two or three English words.  But, why are there so many long words in Russian?  If you doubt me look at the last photo below. 

Below is an example of how we've used Google translate.  If you can read Russian the window to the right should make sense.  At least when I do a backwards translation it says the same thing.  If I use slang or am not real careful with the words I choose it can be unclear and I then have to think of different words to use.   In translate 2-1 and 2-2 it might not be as clear as the first example but still understandable.  The more complex thoughts you try to express leaves more room for bigger errors.

I find if when we are talking on the phone sometimes and I want to say a new word I use a smaller version of Google translate on my iGoogle page.  I can click on more to see examples of the word in different sentences.  I can also type in a sentence here.  Then I will slowly try to say a long word using the syllabification concept to try to be understood.  I was amazed the other day when L used the word changeable to describe the weather in Izhevsk that day.

[SANDRO43]

Bobb, did you have a look at our RWDpedia (http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/mwiki/)?

There are a number of pages on learning Russian (REFERENCE MATERIAL, right-hand column) that may contain something useful for your study .

[bobb]

Bobb, did you have a look at our RWDpedia (http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/mwiki/)?

There are a number of pages on learning Russian (REFERENCE MATERIAL, right-hand column) that may contain something useful for your study .

Thanks for the tip.  I'm always looking for more sources of information.  The difficult part for me is I don't have a clue when you talk about Dative, Prepositive, etc.  Remember, English was always my weakest subject in school.  Having to try and think about these things in addition to new words can be challenging.  And some people think English is difficult to learn.  A woman I met in Izhevsk who has been teaching English for 30+ years thinks English is an easy language to learn.  It was interesting when exploring RWDWiki when I noticed I had found the Russian terms of endearment through another website.  I regularly say a few of those to L when we talk.  I saw a few new things also I will explore.  I especially liked the link to the listen2russian.com.

[SANDRO43]

The difficult part for me is I don't have a clue when you talk about Dative, Prepositive, etc.

Bobb,  Russian is a declensed language (it has 'cases') as was Latin, which fortunately I was forced to learn at school (6th to 8th grade) in my time. This means that its nouns, adjectives, pronouns vary their endings depending on their syntactic roles in a sentence/clause, for example usually:

Nominative case: for sentence subjects (Women are beautiful)
Genitive case: for 'possession' (My Russian woman's eyes are beautiful)
Dative case: for 'destination' (I gave some red flowers to my Russian woman)
Accusative case: for sentence objects (I gave some red flowers to my Russian woman)
Etc. etc.

Any given preposition (for, to, at, with, in, under, etc.) requires some specific case (which, depends on the particular language). If a noun is accompanied by pronouns/adjectives, these must 'agree' with its case and number (syntactic concordance).

Hope this may help somewhat .

A woman I met in Izhevsk who has been teaching English for 30+ years thinks English is an easy language to learn.

I know a few (www.floriani.it/lingue-eng.htm), and I think English is the easiest of them all, comparatively speaking.

[Tamara]

Bobb,

I am really enjoying your TR.  Thank you!  A couple years ago I have composed a table on Russian Grammar, one page that includes all 6 cases, case usage as well as endings for nouns, modifiers/adjectives and personal pronouns. 

For example, it gives you all endings for Nominative and tells you that Nominative is used for
-   the subject of the sentence
-   the predicate complement (noun which follows a linking verb: Masha is a student.)
-   name/title in apposition to the noun (Я читаю газету “Правда”)
-      form of direct address

Or it gives you all endings for Genitive and tells you that Genitive is used:
-    to denote the possessor (of, ‘s)
-   non existence, НЕТ (there is no)
-   2, 3, 4 + Gen.Sing.   5 > +Gen. Pl.
-   after adv. expressions of quantity: сколько, мало, много, немного
-   after prepositions: у, до, без, для, из, от, кроме, около, после
-      after transitive verbs, “partitive” meaning (Она выпила вина.)

This all fits on one page.  I'd be happy to share it with you.  PM if this is something of interest.  Regarding Schaum's Outlines, be careful.  It tends to be overwhelming as it goes into each and every detail and exception.  It is difficult for many students who already even have a degree in Russian.

[SANDRO43]

A couple years ago I have composed a table on Russian Grammar, one page that includes all 6 cases, case usage as well as endings for nouns, modifiers/adjectives and personal pronouns. 

Tamara, something like this?

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/mwiki/index.php?title=Declensions_of_Nouns%2C_Pronouns%2C_Adjectives

Feel free to add any relevant info .

[Tamara]

Tamara, something like this?

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/mwiki/index.php?title=Declensions_of_Nouns%2C_Pronouns%2C_Adjectives

Feel free to add any relevant info .

Sandro, nice table.  Great contribution to the forum.    My table in principle is similar, but different in many aspects.

 

• First and foremost, it specifies when and why the case should be used and is illustrated with examples.  Like Bobb, many of mu students did not know which case to use in what situations.
• It also specifies 5 and 7 letter spelling rules highlighted in color for the endings the rule applies to as it is not applied to all endings, for example soft ending for feminine nouns in Genitive or soft ending for masculine nouns in Nominative.
• Each and every ending is illustrated with example.
• Cases are organized in order they are being studies in most coursebooks and Universities, starting with Nominative followed by Accusative, Genitive, Prepositional and Dative.

Sandro, I have noticed some mistakes in the tables posted.  Unfortunately, I can not correct them, as they are jpg files, hence not editable. I did not get a chance to study each and every line in details, but here is what I noticed in the very beginning.

Nouns table.

Nominative Case.

• Nominative case, neuter, singular endings for nouns are not -ОЕ or -ОЁ, they should be О / Е / МЯ as in окно, здание, имя
• Nominative case, masculine, singular endings for nouns should not only have consonant as ending, but -Й and -Ь as well, so the endings are CONSONANT / Й / Ь as in стол, музей, словарь
• Nominative case, feminine, singular endings for nouns should also have -Ь, so the endings should be А / Я / Ь as in машина, кухня, площадь

Genitive case.

• Genitive case, neuter, singular endings should also have ЕНИ, so the endings should be А / Я / ЕНИ as in окна, здания, имени
• Genitive case, plural.  Masculine nouns have either ОВ or ЕВ endings except when they end in ж/ш/щ/ч/ь, when they have ЕЙ ending. In addition to zero endings and ЕЙ endings for feminine, there is ИЙ. When feminine has a consonant ending plus Я, then Genitive Plural will end in Ь as in недель

And so on, I won't go through the whole list.  I will try to post my table and then you can go through it and see what the differences are if you are interested.  I can't edit or modify yours anyway. 

[bobb]

...Regarding Schaum's Outlines, be careful.  It tends to be overwhelming as it goes into each and every detail and exception.  It is difficult for many students who already even have a degree in Russian.

No kidding!  I've put it on the back shelf for now and have been concentrating on "The Everything Learning Russian Book" w/CD by Julie Stakhnevich. 

The examples below will show give one a good example of how challenging learning Russian can be:

My brother, my sister, and my books = Мой брат, моя сестра, и мои книги
Three different ways to spell and pronounce my.

I speak, you speak, they speak, we all speak. = Я говорю, вы говорите, они говорят, мы все говорим.
Four different ways to spell and pronounce speak.

I am enjoying it and it is going a little slow at times, but I'm moving along.  My goal is to be able to say many different full sentences to her family this summer.  Being able to talk about more than the weather with a full sentence with several words will be good. 

Last night when I was talking to L I had a quick thought as we were finishing our conversation.  Some of you might know the stage of the conversation where you send kisses, and miss you, and softer voices and such.  Come to think of it has anyone had their SO be the one to hang up the phone?  In this relationship that is my job I learned long ago.  After looking at the RWDpedia last night, and having visited briefly and bookmarked the listen2russian.com site, I remembered the phrase on the first page - I would like three kisses.  I hadn't had a time to learn it myself yet but I did the next best thing.  Popped open the sight and played L the recording.  It didn't matter the voice was female, L promptly sent three kisses and then started laughing.  I'm sure she had a good story to tell her colleagues at work and her family and friends later. 

[Tamara]

My goal is to be able to say many different full sentences to her family this summer.  Being able to talk about more than the weather with a full sentence with several words will be good. 

Bobb, great goal.  Keep it up!!! 

[SANDRO43]

And so on, I won't go through the whole list.  I will try to post my table and then you can go through it and see what the differences are if you are interested.

Thanks for your corrections, Tamara, I prepared that table based on a number of grammars which were not thorough enough, apparently . I'll make corrections based on your table, which I'd suggest you post in the RWDpedia, too, either replacing or integrating mine.

[SANDRO43]

My brother, my sister, and my books = Мой брат, моя сестра, и мои книги
Three different ways to spell and pronounce my.

That's gender concordance at work, Bobb, which I forgot to mention in addition to number and case, sorry .

I speak, you speak, they speak, we all speak. = Я говорю, вы говорите, они говорят, мы все говорим.
Four different ways to spell and pronounce speak.

... and this is one of the reasons why I said that English is an easy language, in many cases a root is a "Verb for All Seasons" .