Going to Mexico with my lady

[Gator]

The quality of posting these photos as attachments is not good, yet here are some of hilltribe people:

[Sculpto]

Wishing you all the best Sculpto! 'A' is seemingly more legit the more this goes on.

Yesterday she said something that surprised me a lot.  "A" is very non-sentimental and does not frequently express herself verbally.  But, she said to me.. "Ereek, you best man in the world, I think we will to be happy together".  She has told me she loves me on numerous occasions, but, this was something bigger.  I can't wait to see her!

[Gator]

One more small group (last, I promise, too difficult and the quality is bad)

[Sculpto]

Fiction,

You mentioned that your woman wants entertainment.   I am a traditionalist yet enjoyed the modern clubs atop tall buildings.  The Oriental Hotel has an excellent jazz bar.  One splendid evening the singer was a large black American woman singing the Blues, and the band was comprised of Russian men.
 
In Bangkok be sure to go to Somboom for dinner, a short tuk tuk ride from the Oriental.  It is a popular place among the locals and moderately priced. The fish and crustaceans are kept alive in tanks that you can watch while dining.   My future wife had little exposure to food with chili peppers, so Thailand was the place to lose her virginity.   She ordered one of Samboom's specialties – crab curry, which is not mild.  She took a bite and her eyes got big, yet she somehow smiled.  Although she sweated like a stuck pig, she finished her tasty dish with the help of two beers.  We had spicy food throughout our travels.

When you go from Wat Pho to the Palace, ignore the people who tell you that the palace is closed and they have a better place to see.  They are attempting to drag you to a jewelry shop – so don’t accept the myth that Thai speak only the truth. 

Another must see being that you are an artist – Jim Thompson’s house.  You can reach it easily using the  metro in the sky.  Suggest to your woman that she select a silk something from the retail shop there.


Bon Voyage

Thanks for the tips Gator.  Jim T's house is definitely in the plan.  One of the hotels is just one block away.  I asked her the other day if she likes silk, but, she didn't know the word.. LOL.  I have read there are better places to buy silk, specifically up north where things are made.  But, we will check it all out.  

I have been reading th different Thai forums.  It appears there are a ton of different scams that get worked on tourists.  We are going to try and stay out of obvious tourist areas.. (might not be easy) but I will not fall for any of that stuff.  

I found one site that lists a variety of music venues and upcoming shows.. so.. I am sure we will find some cool things to do in the evenings while in Bangkok.  In Chiang Mai I just found a school that does two day classes in silver smithing so we might look into that.  There is just way way too much to do in Thailand.  One month is going to fly by.  BTW.. I did find some better ways to go trekking to hill tribe villages.. it means getting out of Chiang Mai and heading further north to spots a bit more out of reach as base camps.  It has taken a lot of digging but I think we can get a pretty good experience.  Nevertheless, until we actually arrive in Chiang Mai its all speculation.  The truth will be revealed once we get there.  I did also get a list of xpat hangouts and made some contacts with some artists who have been there a long time, so, I might be able to get some insiders tips also.  

[Sculpto]

Great photos Gator.

I have been reading about Laos also.  It really is going to be a question of available time.  There are numerous threads on the Thailand forums concerning visits to Laos and quite honestly none of it is to be taken lightly.  It is certainly something that can be done, but, I am not sure if we can manage it or not.  Available time to travel/ reward ratio may not make it possible on this trip.  But again, that will be examined more carefully once we get to the north.  I want to be a bit gentle in how I expose her to adventure travel, so, we are starting out a bit easy on well marked trails.. after we go to the first national park I will have a better idea what her tolerance level will be for mud, bugs and other dangers.

The only other thing that is of concern is apparently the "Red Shirts" are planning some mass protests again, same crap that happened earlier this year and resulted in the airport being shut down.  There has also apparently been some flare ups on the Cambodian border, though, I decided against trying to go to Angor anyway again for the limited amount of time we have.  Also, the weather reports are not great.  They just got slammed by a typhoon and there is considerable flooding.  Extended forecasts indicate rain well into the third week of October..   Though, if it is the same kind of jungle rain as I am used to in Mexico it will not be an issue and can be rather pleasant. 

[Gator]

 BTW.. I did find some better ways to go trekking to hill tribe villages.. it means getting out of Chiang Mai and heading further north to spots a bit more out of reach as base camps.  It has taken a lot of digging but I think we can get a pretty good experience.  

I had mentioned Stuart to you 10 days ago.  

http://www.chiangdao.com/nest/abouttourstrekking.htm


It is best to arrange something with him before you arrive in Chiang Mai.  His Chiang Dao base is north adjacent to national parks.  He takes you to villages where you spend the night.  However, he needs time to plan everything, and for the best price you may want to tag along with others.

[Ooooops]

But I am looking into that for Koh Phangan.. huge party scene there and I don't want to be right in the middle of it..

Used to be...   Now that festival moved to Ko Tao.

[Ooooops]

Sculpto, if you need tips about Thailand I can try to help - I did live there for 3 years....       Long time ago, though, but still visit quite frequently.     

[CallMeSasha]

In Laos you ride elephants bareback while in Thailand you have a comfortable platform seat for two. 

sadly those comfy platforms you describe put considerable stress on the elephants back 

we were guilty of that & didn't know it at the time - would never do it again

and if you come across an elephant in a city centre such as bangkok - don't feed them

[Shadow]

and if you come across an elephant in a city centre such as bangkok - don't feed them

Or he will follow you home like a stray dog ? 

[Sculpto]

LOL it gets more interesting every day! 

Bangkok prepares for high water levels,flooding

BANGKOK: -- Four million sandbags have been prepared as temporary embankment walls to cope with coming floods in Bangkok at the peak of this month's wet season, a deputy Bangkok governor said yesterday.

The sandbags will be utilised to prevent flooding at 15 locations most prone to flash foods, said Phornthep Techapaiboon. Flood drainage operations and the Bangkok Metropolitan Administration's BEST rapid-response teams are also on standby to help with emergency flooding, he added.

Water level in canals have been kept at a low level to cope with high rainwater volume, he said. "We expect the drainage of extra water flowing to the Chao Phya River and to the Gulf of Thailand estuary will be fast enough to cope with the rainwater volume," he added.

The 15 roads and locations at greatest risk of flash floods are Chan, Sri Ayutthaya, Soi Sukhumvit 39, 49, 66 and 103, Lat Phrao, Nawamin, Ratchaphisek road at Robinson mall and at Lat Phrao intersection, Phetchaburi road from Banthad Thong to Ratchathewi roads, Nikhom Makkasan, Rama VI, Phetkasem, Yen Arkas, Sri Nakharin and Sanam Chai-Maha Raj road.

The water catchment areas are still capable of holding another 50 per cent of the current maximum capacity. If the maximum rainwater volume reaches 1,800 mm, from the current rate at 1,600, it will be a record for the past 30 years, said Phornthep.

[Sculpto]

I had mentioned Stuart to you 10 days ago.  

http://www.chiangdao.com/nest/abouttourstrekking.htm


It is best to arrange something with him before you arrive in Chiang Mai.  His Chiang Dao base is north adjacent to national parks.  He takes you to villages where you spend the night.  However, he needs time to plan everything, and for the best price you may want to tag along with others.

LOL got distracted Gator.. so much information everywhere.. I will contact him tonight... How well do you know him?

[Sculpto]

never got an answer from Stuart...

anyway.. I am heading to the airport.  "A" arrived safely in Bangkok.  Another 30 hours or so and we will be back together after 7 months apart.  I can't wait!

[Sculpto]

things are great so far.  this city is beautiful chaos! we leave tonight for the jungle then beach.  Crazy woman arrived in heels... now in flipflops.. moscow fashions out the window.. she's gone native in silk batik!  Hair dryer and all makeup abandoned.  exactly what I was hoping for, though, she HATES Thai food.  She has been perfect so far.  Better than I had hoped. 

[Sculpto]

about 12 hours after last post...

and then one misunderstood word led to an argument of epic proportions.  and the entire thing caved in.

in the hours long discussion that followed many things were revealed.  All the obfuscations penetrated and some other issues I didn't even know about were brought to light. 

End of story is.. questions of character and morality, (seems strange coming from me but its serious) a warped self esteem that is beyond arrogance or stubborn.. I don't think there is a word.. oh wait, there is, the one she used to describe herself.. Tyrant, like Stalin... an absolute ability to not compromise and go forward with bad decisions made in the heat of an emotional moment and finally the worst of all is an irrational and emotional insistence on reading between the lines and finding hidden meanings, usually highly inaccurate, that have ultimately proven to be the greatest source of conflict during the entire relationship.  The argument yesterday escalated because she completely misunderstood one word and then refused to listen because she was offended by what she thought I said, not what I actually said, and her Tyrant took over and she made a series of irreversible and extreme decisions in the heat of the moment. 

The paragraph above is the one newbies should read.  This kind of mentality is probably more common than not.  Finding the gem is not easy, no easier than finding one at home and with most likely a similar reward.

I love her, still do, but I can't live with her. 

Im going to hang a couple more days in this steam bath and come home early.  Will be taking a break from women for a while.

I will also ask the MOD to lock this thread.  I am not interested in having any further discussion and will reply.

[Vaughn]

Hang in there, 2012. Enjoy Thailand to its fullest while you have the chance.

[Misha]

I will also ask the MOD to lock this thread.  I am not interested in having any further discussion and will reply.

Sigh.... I feel for you Sculpto, though you can't say that I didn't try to warn you all these weeks and months.

[remiel6]

  I am very sad to hear this turn of events. I wish you the best, I really do.

[Gator]

Eric,

RW require a lot of patience, some more than others.  Your "A" is pushing you to your limit.

Some RW have a reputation for letting a simple misunderstanding blow up into something large.  And then becoming intractable.

You have said before that she describes herself as a tyrant.  She does not lie. 

When this happened to me, I just gave it some time and went around enjoying myself while that particular RW (not my wife) followed me for a couple of days yet not speaking.  So give it some time, as in 2-3 days.

Look at the positive side - she showed up in Thailand to spend a month with you.  She wants to be with you.  Build upon that fact. 

Also, she's young.  Young firecrackers do this crap.  She thinks she is training you.  In fact, you must train her, yet you can not train her in a week.  It will probably happen again during your trip.  Then she will get vaginitis due to the change in climate and diet and whatever other possible reason.  Gee, you have a lot of fun times in front of you.

P-a-t-i-e-n-c-e.

[JR]

questions of character and morality

Did you compliment another woman?

Hmmm, tough decision Eric. That behavior sounds very much like my ex-wife. Wouldn't wish that on anyone. Probably isn't reversible and seems like you've already decided you can't live with it. But as Gator says, a few days may make a world of difference. Remember, you won't be  in that exact place and time again. Make certain you aren't just reacting to the emotional storm.

Whatever happens, best to you.

[Ade]

Sculpto,

a pity that it didn't work out for you although I wasn't surprised to be honest.

But this should highlight one of the pitfalls to newbies that aren't used to communicating with women that do not have English as a first language (and yes, I know you have experience with this Sculpt). From living and dating in non-English speaking countries for the past 20 years and from being married to 2 non-native speakers I've seen these simple misunderstandings blow up time and again. Both partners need to understand that it will happen and that you should never assume the worse case when something is said. It requires patience and rigid temper control. It really helps if people sit down with their other halves early on and talk about the likelihood of misunderstandings occurring and how you intend to deal with it; being fully aware of it beforehand makes all the difference in resolving the misunderstandings later.

Sculpto, you described your girl like she was a drama queen from the get go and she never sounded like someone that would have the patience, understanding or temper control to be able to navigate these misunderstandings without a lot of conflict.

[ECOCKS]

Bummer dude.

Salvage what you can of the trip and get your strategy sorted for your future activities.

Kudos for fessing up BTW.

[ScottinCrimea]

Eric, You have my admiration for coming back to tell the rest of the story.

We bashed you around pretty good before, and I think most of us expected such an outcome, but we also hoped we were wrong.  Many here know how much pain there is in suddenly having your dreams go down the toilet.

From what I know, I sense that when there was something unclear in communication, you assumed the meaning to be positive, while she assumed the meaning to be negative.  That's a hard chasm to overcome.

Having said that, I don't think this is the end of the story.

[LiveFromUkraine]

Sigh.... I feel for you Sculpto, though you can't say that I didn't try to warn you all these weeks and months.

I don't think that was necessary.  Sometimes I think you don't have very good social skills.

[LiveFromUkraine]

Eric, I found this type of behavior in my wife.  

It is better for you to see this now otherwise it can get a lot worst.