I met a girl under special circumstances

[Ravens9273]

To the OP

To make this as simple as can be without alot of debate.

First I still find this topic unacceptable for RWD

However.
There is a saying we are all familiar with.

You cannot love another until you love yourself first.

Anyone selling their body has no respect for themselves. No respect means no love. If this Women cannot love herself how do you expect her to ever love you?
She is still working in the business as this discussion continues. That alone says she does not have respect for you nor love you since she is still continuing.

Last but not least.
Unless you are extremely wealthy and can guarantee her a good life with no problems where she will get everything she wants you are kidding yourself.
Why do you think we have so many repeat offenders going back and forth to prison?
It is hard to change a person who knows a way to make easy fast money.
How do you expect a drug dealer to go to a normal job and accept it when they made $2000 in a few hours selling on the street?
It is very hard to change a person like this and statistics show these facts.

If if by chance you pulled off a miracle here and married this lady and she really did care for you, you must understand the moment something goes wrong she will have the urge to go back to her previous life. In her mind it will always be a quick fix to any money problem.

[Misha]

How does a guy, or even a girl for that matter, ever really know the answer to that question?

Quite simple: being well grounded, not deluding himself or herself with fantasy and paying close attention to their partner to understand who they truly are as a person.

[Blues Fairy]

How many sex workers do you know Blues?  

How is that relevant??  Sculpto, if you could for once THINK before you post.  You said ALL beautiful women are offered to sell themselves at some point, and if they refuse it has rarely anything to do with morality but rather with fear.  You essentially labeled all pretty women whores; now does that have anything to do with reality or rather with some of your own insecurities?

Blues, your opinion would be most appreciated as you are the only woman here

I, too, wonder how the conversation with her Mom went?  If Mom knows and condones, than what kind of family is it?
And if Mom has no clue, how do you suppose it's possible to live with her daughter if she's living such a lie?

[GQBlues]

My story is this... The worry is of course her profession...

My first take with this is, why ruin a perfectly good romantic experience with thoughts of marriage?

My second take is, why judge her for her profession instead of her as a person. Can she be someone whom you can consider, at the very least, a good enough person to trust? We literally live within the midst of people who abhor prostitution but could well be worst in character. You always knew what she did for a living, yet you continued with your relations because of your own self-serving reason. Now you find yourself searching to define what being moral means? Was this not an issue with you before you had sex with her? Which character do you think now is more dubious than the other?

Yes, and like I've said in the past, we all strive to find sanity between the proverbial choice of marrying the devil we know or marrying the devil we don't. Unfortunately, perspective is 50% of men's reality. The other 50% is simply in their heads....

Bottom line ~ there's no gray area for you right now. Stop the bleeding and stand behind your conviction.

[Daveman]

Sorry, I looked for women who did not have using men as a goal and had an old fashioned ideals such as marrying men that they loved and respected, men who also loved and respected them in turn.

Same here... still do actually  

[BillyB]

Question is if she is willing to take any guy just to 'save her' and take her to Europe or if she still wants it to be the right guy like any other girl.

She may rent her body to freak shows but of course she doesn't want to marry one. She's probably smart enough to know those men who hire hookers probably won't be faithful to her.

 The next question is wether she can take being less independent etc. and also if I would be able to live with her past

Ask her to quit her job now if she's serious about you. Give up that 20,000 EUR a month for a more simple life with you. If she does as you say and now that you're her boyfriend, call her up every night. If she's not available to talk to, she's probably still at it doing Tom, Dick and Hairy. You'll know your answer then.

and finally is she automatically ruined for life now..

No. People can change for better but it's up to them. Keep in mind, most people with a checkered past don't change their ways or ways of thinking. If you marry her, do not be surprised if she enjoys a few more rolls in the hay with a variety of men.

[Sculpto]

How is that relevant??  Sculpto, if you could for once THINK before you post.  You said ALL beautiful women are offered to sell themselves at some point, and if they refuse it has rarely anything to do with morality but rather with fear.  You essentially labeled all pretty women whores; now does that have anything to do with reality or rather with some of your own insecurities?

I, too, wonder how the conversation with her Mom went?  If Mom knows and condones, than what kind of family is it?
And if Mom has no clue, how do you suppose it's possible to live with her daughter if she's living such a lie?

Blues.. I should have said MOST, not all.  My bad.  

My knowledge of sex workers, having been very good friends with several, indicated what i wrote regarding morality and fear.  Some of them worked as strippers and would never go past that, because of fear.  Morality rarely enters the question.  People can almost always justify away morality.

I find it interesting that this community is very fast to label sex workers as whores.  Just a bit judgmental now aren't we?  Isn't it possible that such women are providing a valuable and needed service?

[GoodOlBoy]

..... she makes about EUR 20.000 per month.......

Holy sh*t.......She makes $28,500. per month??

Tax free?

Damn, she must be pretty worn out?  :evil:


GOB


BTW....Does she accept MC, Visa or AE?

[Misha]

Morality rarely enters the question.

Umm, perhaps because the people with higher moral values would not have become strippers/prostitutes? Clearly, if you are basing your opinions on women who did join these professions, your sample is quite biased. 

[Sculpto]

GOB.. that can be ten clients.. even less.  

Your comments are really childish.  Sorry.

oo wow.. they had sex..

[GoodOlBoy]

Umm, perhaps because the people with higher moral values would not have become strippers/prostitutes? Clearly, if you are basing your opinions on women who did join these professions, your sample is quite biased. 

Misha.......he lives in SAN FRANCISCO.

Enough said.


GOB

[Ininiteluck]

Ok... I am talking to her in about an hour. If you could ask her 3-5 questions, what would they be. With the intention to 'verify' her true feelings for me if any, agenda etc?

[GoodOlBoy]

Ok... I am talking to her in about an hour. If you could ask her 3-5 questions, what would they be.

#1. Is she busy?  :evil:


GOB

[BillyB]

I find it interesting that this community is very fast to label sex workers as whores.  Just a bit judgmental now aren't we?  Isn't it possible that such women are providing a valuable and needed service?

A whore is a woman who engages in sexual acts for money. The word may not sound pleasant to your ears but it is the truth. Is there a polite term for women who rent their bodies?

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/whore

[BillyB]

Ok... I am talking to her in about an hour. If you could ask her 3-5 questions, what would they be. With the intention to 'verify' her true feelings for me if any, agenda etc?

It's going to take a lot of time to verify if she's sincere with you and willing to change her ways. A few questions now won't give you the answer you're seeking. Are you willing to gamble a lot of time on her is a choice you're going to have to make.

[Ininiteluck]

#1. Is she busy?  :evil:


GOB

Let me remind you... some wifes can be busy too

[Sculpto]

Umm, perhaps because the people with higher moral values would not have become strippers/prostitutes? Clearly, if you are basing your opinions on women who did join these professions, your sample is quite biased. 

I think you would be really surprised who has worked in the sex trade Misha.  REALLY surprised.  Just like the OPs girl started out by going to Turkey and worked as a "bar girl" and moved up to other things.. SF is full of girls from every part of the country that do the same thing.  And you know which ones make the most money?  

My sample is based on reality.  Most girls who have done such work will never admit it.  Encounter them on the other side of the fence, and guess what happens, the truth comes out.  

So, there was one girl in the circus.. she went by the name of Snow.  She was hotter than hot and we worked as partners for a while.  She teased the hell out of me.  Finally I asked her to get together and she declined.  I said why?  She said, I will show you later.. then you decide if you still want to.. meet me at X address tomorrow night.  So, I met her there, we went to get something to eat and then she said, I have to go to work but i want you to come see me work.  OK, sure.. we walked a few blocks over and when we were right in front of the biggest most high end XXX strip club in SF, she said.. "are you coming in?"  I went in, saw her show.. she was awesome.  While I was there I ran into three other women I knew.  Two I already knew about from the circus, but one of them, I was shocked.  I knew her Mother!  Her Mother is an ordained priest in the Unitarian church.  I always thought that girl was a prude.  I had eaten dinner at their house a bunch of times.  But there she was, up on the stage doing what they do.  She needed college money.. saw me in the crowd, came over and made me promise not to tell her Mom.  But, she was clearly enjoying her job.  I did not get together with the stripper, for the same reasons I would advise the OP not to get serious with his girl, and I kept the other ones secret to this day.

[kievstar]

Billy, your not 100% correct.  A whore does not always receive money nor give sex.

a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.

A prostitute.
A person considered sexually promiscuous.
A person considered as having compromised principles for personal gain.
intr.v.   whored, whor·ing, whores

To associate or have sexual relations with prostitutes or a prostitute.
To accept payment in exchange for sexual relations.
To compromise one's principles for personal gain.

[GoodOlBoy]

Let me remind you... some wifes can be busy too

Touche' ! 


GOB

[Sculpto]

Billy, your not 100% correct.  A whore does not always receive money nor give sex.

a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.

A prostitute.
A person considered sexually promiscuous.
A person considered as having compromised principles for personal gain.
intr.v.   whored, whor·ing, whores

To associate or have sexual relations with prostitutes or a prostitute.
To accept payment in exchange for sexual relations.
To compromise one's principles for personal gain.

service provider.. sex worker..

using the word whore is a judgement that is harsh.  Its not your (billy or anyone else) job to judge the woman.  Leave that to god or the devil.

[SMS60]

Ok

You want her to be a part of your life? It seems this is the type of opinion you want.

Heres what you do. You become a business partner with her. Money is very important to her so this would go over fairly easy.

When she is in the states she will stay at your place. She will go for free room and board no doubt. Set up a room where she can entertain guests.

You are going to have to be a strong dude for this business venture but she will be next to you and thats all that counts for now.

With her attitude towards life and morals you are in a money making position. You basically become her pimp and keeper. You can do this all from your residence. Figure a percentage for the money and your off and running. You can keep your single friends, workmates and other aquintances "serviced" if you know what I mean. Hell go down to the local bar in the evenings and find some new clientel.

I see this as a win win. You get the girl and the money.

You most likely will have to find another women on the side to keep your head on straight but hell thats the spice of life. IF she is making $28000.00 a month and you get half you have it made. Tax free.

You have a golden opprotunity with this lady. Use her for every dome you can.

[groovlstk]

Ok... I am talking to her in about an hour. If you could ask her 3-5 questions, what would they be. With the intention to 'verify' her true feelings for me if any, agenda etc?

Big issues like this can't be resolved via the Cosmo formula, i.e., in 3-5 questions.

[Sculpto]

I cant believe you guys are making these kinds of comments.  

I dont think I am the one who thinks lowly of women around here.

[Sculpto]

Big issues like this can't be resolved via the Cosmo formula, i.e., in 3-5 questions.

ditto

[kievstar]

I like the word whore and the meanings I found came from the dictionary.  Its a normal word and men can be whores as well.