Why are y'all really looking for RW?

[Markus]

Actually, there is no other way to really describe this phenomena without getting into 'justification mode'

.. Oh yeah, they are traditional
.. Oh yeah, they make better wives
.. Oh yeah, they are great in bed
.. Oh yeah, they drool over every WM getting off the plane

etc.. all of course pure, but pretty BS.

Based on the little experience I have acquired in real life and on the forum, the man specifically seeking a RW has so much smoke injected up his butt that he is simply ready to explode.

The only relationships I have seen hold up over time were those where marriage was a result and not goal.

Best way to find a wife is not to look for one in the first place.

Yeah, those slavic looks and accent are quite enticing, but don't let that fool you into thinking the girl next door isn't worthy because her skin may be a bit thicker or that your pool of available women doesn't match your newly found expectations.  In the end it's all only skin deep and that starts to disappear the day you marry.

This is BS

[Markus]

Thanks, Shadow ... You seem to be an exception here, then ...

Kevin

Not really.
Such was my case also.
My wife just happened to be from Ukraine.
I admit, I was looking for someone outside the USA.
My reasons were abundant. 

Honesty at last. Finally. I hope I make it to the end of this thread. Thx tfcrew.

[Daveman]

I wonder how many would look in the FSU were it not poor.  AM aren't looking in Nordic countries, or France, where women generally are not overweight either. 

Many men do search in Asian countries.  I think it is related to "poor"  because those are the most likely to market themselves (or be marketed).  If someone didn't make a buck in the process, very few (AM) would have realized the product even exists.  

If French or Nordic women began to market themselves, grabbed some cool agency hype to go along with it.. there would probably be men flocking over there as well, to have their eyes kicked open as the dream fizzled.  :evil:

[Markus]

RW who read this forum always laugh at things like " RW prefer older men" or "they are seeking for being housewives"
 

Right on Doll. What a myth.

[Markus]

LoL!  I think all of us who do this are from the Island of Misfit Toys ... 

Maybe Rudolph and Santa will show up and rescue us...

Hah! yeah... the docile RW.. it's funny, sometimes they are the most docile, tender, easy women in the world.. and then without much warning,,, all hell breaks loose..  That's when I'm thankful for Piva, any mode of transportation (taxi, bus, marshrutka), and Russian Billiards...

You apparently don't know what it's like to be be a chick magnet.

[veritas]

This is BS

Congratulations, Markus ... That was reply #200 in this thread -- and a worthy one it was ...

Kevin

P.S.  Along with #198, #199, #201, #203, #204, ..........................................................

[GQBlues]

 I wonder how many men here would look overseas if the American women were in the same shape as FSU women?

Likely the same, or even more...adding more socially desirable US women does nothing to the number of socially undesirable US males in terms of relationships. An old fat fart remains an old fat fart even if the number of beautiful US women doubled, tripled or is multiplied a thousand times...You just have more US women refusing to date old fat farts.

[Markus]

Yes but will she be 20 to 30 years his junior, slender and beautiful? Probably not.....

Please note that I did not say that ALL men doing this are social mis-fits. The VAST majority of men seeking an FSU bride will never find this forum. I am talking about the fantasy that takes a hold of a man when he is led to believe (usually deluding himself) that he can by-pass all the time and effort of finding a suitable mate in his back yard and instead thinks he can somehow "buy" the perfect wife in an economically disadvantaged country. When he sees the photos of the young, hot women who post they'll accept a man twenty or forty years their senior all reason leaves the equasion. He wraps himself in so much BS and justification that no one can talk him out of it? Why? Because he feels like a kid in a candy store with a wad of cash to spend.

More intelligence at play. There's a few men with ladies 20 years their junior, but not many. Do you have the stats? And to talk about 40 years, come on. Perhaps you should concentrate on
your endeavor because your view here is in left field. Concentrate.

 Multiple trollish, baiting posts in thread. The pattern of this type of participation stops here.

[veritas]

And to talk about 40 years, come on. Perhaps you should concentrate
on your endeavor because your view here is in left field.  Concentrate.

Markus, there are plenty of women online who POST that they'll accept a man 20, 30, and even 40 years older ...

Read again what JR actually wrote there ...

Kevin

P.S.  OK, I give up ... No more comments from me about Markus -- I think!  :evil:

[Markus]

newkt,

I went back and read and you are correct. And he was only talking about 1 man. I wonder who this man is? Perhaps he knows him.

Mark

[Lily]

Thanks Lily for interesting speculation or hypothesis.  Is this some original thought, or is it a common idea among certain circles of friends or intellectuals?

Are you sure  you  don't have a lot of training in sociology and psychology; rather than law?  :-))

But I certainly agree with one part; that is that the women in FSU seemed to have survived the various 'crises' over the past 20 years better than the men.  They actually seem a little more driven and entrepreneurial than the men.  I assumed this was the 'mother instinct' kicking in to protect the children.

And also Lily, have your perceptions and thought process been changing?
At one time, you seemed to lean toward the idea that some women of your age couldn't find man because the men had too much to select from.  You even said it was hard to find a 'no strings attached relationship.'

Now, you seem to be indicating something different.  It is you, rather than the men, who is 'selecting out' most of them.  You don't want the men because of the "mentality of hopelessness, which does not add any attractiveness to a person."

It is my original observations and analysis. Not sure whether I have heard this point from someone else.

As far as for seeming contradiction to which you refer, this is not actually one. In fact, both men and women do their choices. Often, but not always, RM are supposed to make their choice first, like being active 'buyers' in a sort of market where women would be the passive 'goods'. This is supported by Russian patriarchal mentality. However, in order to have a choice, one really needs to be a 'competent' buyer, who has a purchasing power, by whatever scale it is measured. Not many men have been able to obtain a relatively well-off status, or to stay in good health, or stay alive at all. Therefore, there are comparably not many valid buyers.

Of those few valid buyers, not many would be desirable to women, in turn. Of note, I talk about instinctive choice, not the reasonable one. Women also have a choice, and it does not actually matter whether she chose first or he chose first. If their choices are not the same, if you want me but i don't want you, or vice versa - no couple is made, both are singles.

Women are however many, and most of them are of relatively good quality, because they are survivors, they try to look and to do their best, they used to get the best out of even the most unfavorable and disadvantaged life conditions. Given the patriarchal mentality that is prevalent in Russian society, Russian men, while living their hard lives, are in the opinion that they are somehow superior to women. Women tend to support this, to a certain extent. In this respect, RW and RM seem to be well in line, because, supporting this relation, the formers want to be as beautiful and desirable as they can, and latter want to have as many choices as possible in their position, or just as many women at the same time as possible

Therefore, my views have not changed, and I don't see a contradiction in my post.

And yes, I'd say it is also problematic to find someone even for no strings attached, starting from about 30 years old of a woman's life. RM generally don't see a woman over 30 worth their courting efforts. On the woman's point, another reason could be that there are only a few men who would be attractive, as Russian life takes its toll on RM.

Other than that, not many RW would really look for this type of relationship, given the mentioned patriarchal mentality and not many women who would desire 'independency' in comparison to the women in the West.

[khelkhov]

Yeah, but you were 20. There is a HUGE difference in the pool of women at 40 then at 20.

Being a guy in his late 20's, I disagree with this statement!  Sure there are oodles of nice American girls in their 20's.  However, I still have not find the right one here in the states.  I keep coming across many party girls wanting to booze or slutting around, girls with psychological and self-esteem problems and high powered career girls wearing men's clothes and acting like men...     

The reality is that I was very frustrated with the situation with AW and that after trying for 2 years I couldn't even find one locally to date (well, I could but I would have to significantly lower my standarts! Women in Russia are faced with the same situation - sure they can find a local RM to date or to marry, but many of them would have to significantly lower their standarts!).

That is exactly my dilemma...  Sure I can find young AW in their 20's to date... However, so many of them are not really my type.  I absolutely have no desire to settle down for less. 

[JR]

More intelligence at play. There's a few men with ladies 20 years their junior, but not many. Do you have the stats? And to talk about 40 years, come on. Perhaps you should concentrate on
your endeavor because your view here is in left field. Concentrate.

40? Where did I say forty? You are attributing to me that which I have not written. My view is in left field? Stats? Stats are for whimps and cowards.....Perhaps it is my experiences which lead me to such beliefs. At any rate I stand by my belief that most men in this endeavor or not here because they are successful hometown daters and that they end up chasing younger, prettier women than they'd dare back home.

[Daveman]

The K-1, K3 stats/ types of men discussion were split into a well deserved new topic here:

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=12440.0

Interesting stuff.

[JR]

Back to the topic: Why are y'all really looking for RW?

Because as a dating pool they are younger, prettier and easier....DUH )))

[Misha]

At any rate I stand by my belief that most men in this endeavor or not here because they are successful hometown daters and that they end up chasing younger, prettier women than they'd dare back home.

  I agree. We don't do it for the love of borscht 

[Daveman]

I agree. We don't do it for the love of borscht 

Hey now, that's one of the rationalizations more healthy reasons I do this!!   

I've said it before and I'll say it again.. there's nothing more sexy than a woman soaking at her leisure in a tub of borshch... unless of course it's a woman soaking in a tub of borshch and also conditioning her hair with a dabble of smetana! MmmMMMmmMM--la-la!

[JR]

I agree. We don't do it for the love of borscht 

I love borscht ))))

[Jooky]

An old fat fart remains an old fat fart even if the number of beautiful US women doubled, tripled or is multiplied a thousand times...You just have more US women refusing to date old fat farts.

I don't think reality works that way. Look at Russia. Women often take what's available.

A guy I know in Russia is the perfect example. He's smart and has an ok job, but he's short, dull, drinks, smokes, about the ugliest dude I've ever seen and worst of all the guy reeks.

In the US, he'd be about as undesireable as a guy can possibly get. In some Jerry Springer show circles he could probably do alright if he was a biker with a scruffy goatee and some tattoos, but he's not. He actually did spend some time in the US. He hated it. He got zero chicks here.

In Russia, however, he's got a very cute young wife.  :noidea:

[Misha]

In Russia, however, he's got a very cute young wife.  :noidea:

And if he tried, he could have a mistress on the side  :evil:

[kievstar]

You said he is smart.  There are many RW who put smartness over personal looks. 

[GQBlues]

I don't think reality works that way. Look at Russia. Women often take what's available.

Sure. In Russia. For dynamics and reasons at play in Russia that doesn't exist here. That's why the MOB is in Russia, not here.

AWs will much rather play lezbees, or even someone else's beau, before curling up with Father Time. The Hefners and the Nicholsons in our society are exceptions, they will never be the rule.

AWs simply have choices. RWs in Russia do not. Heck, even single RWs in the US easily learn they now have choices. I've yet to see a young FSUW living in the US who divorced an old fart only to go out searching for another old fart to date/marry. Nope. They all start dating like AWs do - they start dating Batman and not Alfred. Why? because they no longer 'have to'. Just like AWs never had to.

This is why even RMs living in the US find the need to go back to Russia to snag a PYT because that dynamic simply doesn't play here. Even if he was surrounded by a 100 PYTs and he's the only guy left at the party. Uh-uh, no way, no how. Having a dozen AW PYT in the same room may increase his chances but it will never mean he can a close a single deal.

In Russia, it really doesn't take much to become a Hefner or a Nicholson, and that have very little to do with how many Russian PYTs there are.

[veritas]

I agree. We don't do it for the love of borscht 

I've said it before and I'll say it again.. there's nothing more sexy than a woman soaking at her leisure in a tub of borshch...

I love borscht ))))

  What the hell is borscht??  (I'm giving someone other than Wiki the chance to rapture prolific on its wonders) ...

Kevin

[Ade]

  What the hell is borscht??  (I'm giving someone other than Wiki the chance to rapture prolific on its wonders) ...

Kevin

You're kidding, right? It's mentioned in just about every other thread and you haven't seen it yet?

I, by all accounts, make a mean borscht, as good as, if not better than, any tasted by us in RU restaurants or homes. My variation is called Welsh Borscht. Seriously, it's awesome.

[Jooky]

I've yet to see a young FSUW living in the US who divorced an old fart only to go out searching for another old fart to date/marry

Hmmm... it's happened to two members that used to post on these boards. The new old farts apparently had more money.

Anyways, my comments aren't about age differences, they're about choices and in particular perceived choices.

Think about it this way, for thousands of years people found mates from a very small group of choices. Nowadays our perceived choices are exponentially bigger, but it's no easier to find a mate. It's probably harder, because with more perceived choices, the more choosy people are.

Would American women choose to lezz out rather than be with Father Time? Some would yup, because in our society it's a popular and acceptable choice. Others wouldn't. As is, plenty of women will date men 10-20 years older right here the good ole USofA.

I disagree with your example of the guy at the party. It just goes against what I've seen a hundred times that an average guy who strikes out at a club has much better chances with the same type of girls he struck out with at smaller private party.

In Russia, like you say, the choices are more limited for women. If the choices became more limited here, women would likewise be less choosy. That's all I'm saying.