Elena's Models

[Vinnvinny]

See what I mean? 

Ya know, I use to think this was a vanity problem afflicting most females until I started reading the boards

I'm guessing that you look a fair bit older than your age and that you are simply very jealous of us men who look much younger. 

[Faux Pas]

I'm guessing that you look a fair bit older than your age and that you are simply very jealous of us men who look much younger. 

Yeah, that's the ticket! Works for me 

I tend to believe I am more of a realist. I don't confuse flattery with honesty. "Oh, you don't look such and such age" is flattery, not honesty. I did hear that often as well and, well into my late 40's and 9 times of 10 from someone much younger. I don't hear it much these days but I don't fret over it. I knew the truth then and especially now, that I don't hear it near as often

[CDW]

I just got my second rejection of the EOIs (Expression of Interests) I sent.
Arthur

I had very poor start too, but now I have 70% success rate.  Don't worry

[Lily]

As I said in a previous post, what do you think should be in the first response letter?  Just a hi and here is my real email address, or my life story, or something inbetween.  I read somewhere it should include a lot, including why you are bothering with searching for a lady so far away, what you like to do day to day, etc.  I don't want to overwhelm, but I don't want to be minimal.  Any suggestions?   
 

My suggestion would be to find something in her profile or picture that tells something on her personality, or hobbies. Just one or two things where you feel you could develop some basis for conversation. Think of what you might comment or ask about them. It would be even better to weave in a few compliments to her into that (weren't it her physical qualities that actually got your attention, were they?   ). Something like, 'on that second picture, isn't it actually a part of the Trevi Fontain? are you often in Rome?'.
Such position potentially may portray you in a more favorable light in the woman's eyes during the first contact, demonstrating that you are not only a well-rounded person and good communicator, but that you actually took some more than ordinary amount of attention to read her profile. We do like that   Also, such socially accepted questions are non-threatening and may likely prompt her to provide a meaningful answer to you. Which can lead to a discussion.
In other words, do the initial contact the way as you would have done it when meeting a stranger in a quality social setting.
The emails with a content 'hi', 'how are you' and the like look just awkward.    Although people sometimes use them in an in-person social settings, the dating sites are different in the respect that you have to be much more thorough with your words. In the emails, they are your only means of communication, there is no others.

[lordart]

My suggestion would be to find something in her profile or picture that tells something on her personality, or hobbies. Just one or two things where you feel you could develop some basis for conversation. Think of what you might comment or ask about them. It would be even better to weave in a few compliments to her into that (weren't it her physical qualities that actually got your attention, were they?   ). Something like, 'on that second picture, isn't it actually a part of the Trevi Fontain? are you often in Rome?'.
Such position potentially may portray you in a more favorable light in the woman's eyes during the first contact, demonstrating that you are not only a well-rounded person and good communicator, but that you actually took some more than ordinary amount of attention to read her profile. We do like that   Also, such socially accepted questions are non-threatening and may likely prompt her to provide a meaningful answer to you. Which can lead to a discussion.
In other words, do the initial contact the way as you would have done it when meeting a stranger in a quality social setting.
The emails with a content 'hi', 'how are you' and the like look just awkward.    Although people sometimes use them in an in-person social settings, the dating sites are different in the respect that you have to be much more thorough with your words. In the emails, they are your only means of communication, there is no others.

Excellent, Excellent! This is the kind of thing I needed.  Thank you very much.  I have my first letter away, so we will see what happens.

Thank you everyone for their insights!  It has been both helpful and enlightening!

Arthur

[BillyB]

Lordart,
  Lily does make good suggestions. Women read into the letter you send more than you think and her suggestion to make it more personal will impress ladies but I chose to do things differently after weighing pros and cons.
 
My initial letter was a cut and paste canned letter with only the names changed. Some women were turned off and told me they didn't like the same letter that is sent to everyone. Some probably ignored me. The only advantage I had with a canned letter is that I can make a lot more contacts in a shorter time. If a woman responded favorably then I would personalize the second letter commenting about something in her profile or photo.
 
I remember a guy on a forum saying his initial letter to ladies is 16 pages long and although many advised against it, he insisted he was right. Keep it less than a page long so you don't put the ladies to sleep.

[JL]

CDW....it comes in spurts on Elenas. In my opinion you are the perfect age. I am 50 and have over the last year found 4 or 5 beautiful, 25-30 year olds who are normal, professionals, who share the same sense of humor with me and we have great frun taking and planning our first nights together in a few weeks. 
intelligent girs with wonderful and witty personalities. It took me a long time to find them though. They just had womans day so for about 6 days many just disappeared...then before that another holiday......you just get used to it.
One thing I would advise you to put in your profile is something like....."I don't want to right letters forever,,,I want to have a meeting as soon as we feel it is time. I want to look in your eyes so that we may really know each other."
You will see this same comment on many of the girls profiles. Too many people write  and never get on a plane and just go for it.Too many people write too long , the girls get bored after 3 months and just give up. You have to be sure about her and learn what question to ask and how to feel her out........but if someone really looks like a candidate the guys who has the nuts to jump a plane and go see her is the guy who will get her.....if not her another. Several guys here have done that very thing. Boldness wins the day in this endeavor if you have covered all bases and done dude diligence. I met one 2 weeks ago I flipped over....our personalities are so much the same and our sense of humor. I spenta week trying to convince her to find someone younger but she insistes she want to meet me first. So I agreed and told her I am coming in a couple of weeks. I also met a gorgeous concert pianist who teaches an a University and is finishing law school. She is unbelievably disciplined in her fields....all those degrees and only 25. Half my age. I cannot get anywhere with here or er mother trying to convince them I might be a bit old and she should marry a 40 year old.
Don't get in a hurry and write honest and open, genuine letters. The nice people notice that Your age and appearance are perfect. They like need and well groomed....so keep that in mind. They like to dress up and go out. They would never be seen in public in some of there thing girls in the states wear to the grocery or to go shopping in the stated.  )  Good luck

[JL]

I don't have any professional photos at the moment, unfortunately.   I have many good photos - but not alone 

Thanks for the recommendation

You really don't need professional photos. Learn to stay out of direct sunlight Just one in a suit or sport coat, casual clothes.....maybe sports clothes. If you hair is long you need to make it really neat for the shots.
Pay attention to fingernails and a recent shave
Remember.....girls look at they same things the are interested in and it's not your crotch. They notice a watch, nice clothing, shoes, jewelry, confidence and personality.....same as everywhere. Then after you know them you can revert to the more casual wear  like most of live in. )

[jone]

JL,

Nice posts and welcome aboard.  Your take is spot on in many areas.  Hope you have great luck with your visit in two weeks. 

My only caution is that sometimes if it is too good to be true, it is.  The gal I am currently dating was the last one on my short list of a trip I did last summer:  WMVS: Woo many, visit some.

Hope to see much more from you in the future.

-j

[Muzh]

CDW....it comes in spurts on Elenas. In my opinion you are the perfect age. I am 50 and have over the last year found 4 or 5 beautiful, 25-30 year olds who are normal, professionals, who share the same sense of humor with me and we have great frun taking and planning our first nights together in a few weeks. 
intelligent girs with wonderful and witty personalities. It took me a long time to find them though. They just had womans day so for about 6 days many just disappeared...then before that another holiday......you just get used to it.

Between you and me, they are just seasoning you for the grill.

They will not eat you alive. They will cook you first to make sure you are well done.

One thing I would advise you to put in your profile is something like....."I don't want to right [sic] letters forever,,,I want to have a meeting as soon as we feel it is time. I want to look in your eyes so that we may really know each other."

LMAO

Not only they are going to cook you, you are asking for it.

You will see this same comment on many of the girls profiles.

Ah yes, they are showing you the menu.

Too many people write  and never get on a plane and just go for it.Too many people write too long , the girls get bored after 3 months and just give up.

LMAO again

Boy, they are going to pluck you good. I'm pretty sure others will explain it for you.

You have to be sure about her and learn what question to ask and how to feel her out........but if someone really looks like a candidate the guys who has the nuts to jump a plane and go see her is the guy who will get her.....if not her another.

And you are going to figure this by skyping with her two or three times and then meet her in person.

This is a pop-up fly. Anyone wants to shag it?

Several guys here have done that very thing.

Look in the trainwreck section.

Boldness wins the day in this endeavor if you have covered all bases and done dude diligence.

This is the first intelligent thing you have said so far.

I met one 2 weeks ago I flipped over....our personalities are so much the same and our sense of humor. I spenta week trying to convince her to find someone younger but she insistes she want to meet me first. So I agreed and told her I am coming in a couple of weeks. I also met a gorgeous concert pianist who teaches an a University and is finishing law school. She is unbelievably disciplined in her fields....all those degrees and only 25. Half my age. I cannot get anywhere with here or er mother trying to convince them I might be a bit old and she should marry a 40 year old.
Don't get in a hurry and write honest and open, genuine letters. The nice people notice that Your age and appearance are perfect. They like need and well groomed....so keep that in mind. They like to dress up and go out. They would never be seen in public in some of there thing girls in the states wear to the grocery or to go shopping in the stated.  )  Good luck

Make sure you bring your own BBQ sauce. Theirs is kinda bitter.

[Faux Pas]

And you are going to figure this by skyping with her two or three times and then meet her in person.

This is a pop-up fly. Anyone wants to shag it?
 

Nahhhh. Those that know everything before traveling aren't generally open to a different idea. 

[JL]

yes if you are new to this take some time learning the ropes or else you will get burned. I started 5 or 6 years ago. You have to learn the signs and the ropes and how to investigate and cover your ass because there are the shrewdest predators out there you will ever meet. There are some very really normal people also...they are sometimes hard to tell apart because the scammers know what to say and how to be the "normal person"

[lordart]

After a few months my subscription ran out.  I tried the platinum plan eventually and certainly got more results, as far as talking to people with the platinum plan.

I did end up talking to two of them, but I have the feeling both were predators.  One wanted me to come out after about a month or so, but we never discussed more than family things.  I wanted her to know more about me before I came out because of the expense (didn't tell her that) and I never heard from her again.  The other never contacted me back because I like video games.  I'm a coder, and even had a business around such a thing at one point, so it wasn't like that wasn't in my profile.  So I am not sure why they both stopped at the same time.  I can guess.

So what would have happened if I went to the Ukraine for the one that wanted me to come out there?

At this point I am talking to the lady I first knew in St. Petersburg again, and have been since January.  We will see how that goes.

[Muzh]

After a few months my subscription ran out.  I tried the platinum plan eventually and certainly got more results, as far as talking to people with the platinum plan.

I did end up talking to two of them, but I have the feeling both were predators.  One wanted me to come out after about a month or so, but we never discussed more than family things.  I wanted her to know more about me before I came out because of the expense (didn't tell her that) and I never heard from her again.  The other never contacted me back because I like video games.  I'm a coder, and even had a business around such a thing at one point, so it wasn't like that wasn't in my profile.  So I am not sure why they both stopped at the same time.  I can guess.

So what would have happened if I went to the Ukraine for the one that wanted me to come out there?

At this point I am talking to the lady I first knew in St. Petersburg again, and have been since January.  We will see how that goes.

Most probably she would have looked very different from her profile, but that would not have stopped her from going shopping with you.

[JL]

yes I know what you mean. I have certainly had similar experiences. All I can say is keep plugging away and eventually things change. I think It took me writing maybe 300 people to find 4 or 5 that I felt were very much like myself and my friends here in the US. Similar sense of humor, forgiving when I said something stupid or made an off color joke.....very funny and witty themselves and would talk about the events of their days and family goings on and also problems. You will eventually meet people you just connect with. They will ask you to come visit and offer to come get you at the airport at their expense and pay for your apartment for you till you get there and can re-pay them You eventually meet nice normal people but never let your guard down. It is just part of like there. But there are plenty of people who have no contact with the scammer industry, they are aware of it and we talk about it, but they are more concerned with the sextourists that come there to seduce then.....or take them on a trip and rape them in Turkey and leave then trapped with no money or passport. That happened to a friend O mine recently.....she was naive and trusting.....now she may be damaged goods for a long time.

[SANDRO43]

One thing I would advise you to put in your profile is something like....."I don't want to right letters forever...

Quite reasonable, they wouldn't have understood what you had rotten, anyway .

[CDW]

I am not with Elenas Models anymore... not for months lol

[southernX]

i used elenas , & found them to be very good , pay for the top membership and use it wisely

when i say wisely  i mean 

you should already know yourself personality and character wise
you should know what type of personality and character best suits you for a compatible match up ,

also know and define what doesnt suit you

,

study the ladys profiles carefully , , id be inclined to select less ladys as potentials to write to ,
in other words pick your targets carefully ,

then write a personalised genuine honest and open letter to each of your selections ,
FSU ladys ime , respond better to the above , rather than the shotgun aproach of EOI , s

it is still a numbers game , but define your search , and then stick to it , dont get sidetracked by pictures ,

genuine open honest letters will usually get a response ime

SX

[CDW]

I have re-joined Elenas Model (using new ID) again 2 days ago, and already have 25 messages waiting for me to open!!!