Russian women are not for everyone!

[jinx13]

Whether employed or self-employed this venture kills productivity.

 Amen to that one BC, your work will suffer, but sometimes there are more important things in life, and finding your other half goes to the top of the list.

 Agree with KenC about the divorced guy thing. My first time over was about a year and a half after my divorce, I'm not sure if I was quite ready. I mean I dated a few AW during that time, so it wasn't like I was on the rebound, but I'm not sure if I had gotten the dating thing out of my system yet. I was enjoying the single life, but missing the married life too, not sure if I was emotionally ready to handle a RW at that time.

 Agree with almost all the other reasons listed for RW not being for everyone, most of these have already been mentioned, but my top 5 would be:

 5. Closeminded men, you must be adaptable!
 4. Guys without the income,  It's not cheap, you can't avoid the costs of doing this.
 3. Men without patience, sometimes I wonder If I am one of them, but I'm holding up..so far 
 2. Men who hate AW, I don't think this is good criteria for searching out a foreign wife, if you can't find good things about AW, than maybe you just have a problem with women in general.

 and at number one is....

 1. 40 year old virgins!      nuff said!

[viking]

BC

I understand. Maybe more so then the average guy. I have made 3 trips already and planning a 4th. And only consider myself an advanced newbie, compared to others. I have gotten off my butt and on a plane. I have made my share of mistakes. I have learned, and listened, and continue to do so. But to suggest that ones needs say 10 weeks a year to devote to this pusuit or don't even bother, then maybe half the guys on this forum should just pack it in. Sure this is a challenge, no doubt. Sure it takes time to know somebody. Yes, one needs to spend time with a woman who has the potential to be a wife. I do not relish being the poster child for those who may be in the same position as myself. Not having unlimited free time. (BTW, I do have more than 2-3 weeks, but not 10. I am the devils advocate here). But I have learned that if you want something, there will always be a way to achieve your goal.  And the reverse is also true. A lot of free time does not guarantee success either. You could spend months living in the FSU, and if you do not have the other traits needed, it may not happen. As I said before, if both parties are honest, knows what is in front, understands the expectations and commitments, it can happen. Yes, you may need more time when she arives then when you are searching. But months?  I dunno. I have talked to folks who took off a few weeks and that seemed to work. It is all about planning. And the relationship. And the woman. And finally, may I add, that often times the things you work the hardest for are the things you appreciate the most.

I am not discounting your valuable concerns. I am saying that where there is a will, there is a way.

[viking]

BTW, there is another thread going on "How much time is enough", that covers much of this same ground.

[KenC]

Ken

Good advice is good advice and should not be ignored. But the advice goes to learning, preparation, planning and so forth. Because a guy has 3 weeks vacation should not deny him the ability to find a good RW. Everyone should have  shot.

Why is that true Viking?  I don't think it is.  Everyone does not have a shot at this and that is what this thread is about.  Some men are excluded by their circumstances or should be excluded because they fall short of some of the criteria being sighted in this thread interestingly titled Russian women are not for everyone!
KenC

[KenC]

BTW, there is another thread going on "How much time is enough", that covers much of this same ground.

Viking,
There is a lot more to this thread than just vacation time.
KenC

[viking]

Ken

I will re-phrase. My comment was about time. It should not be the ultimate limiting factor. If someone does not have some of the other criteria, traits, etc.. mentioned up thread, then your statement is correct.

[Turboguy]

Why is that true Viking?  I don't think it is.  Everyone does not have a shot at this and that is what this thread is about.  Some men are excluded by their circumstances or should be excluded because they fall short of some of the criteria being sighted in this thread interestingly titled Russian women are not for everyone!
KenC

OK, now that we have decided that should we create a committee to break the news to them?

[KenC]

Turbo,
If we did that, you would be the absolute last one on it! 
KenC

[BC]

Viking,

Interesting concept 'ultimate limiting factor'..

I guess as it relates to this thread I would say the ultimate limiting factor is putting all your eggs into one basket.

Doing so financially, emotionally or with other limited resources like time is heading down the path to trouble.

If one were to ask me for words of wisdom, my response would be:

"Know when to hold and when to fold. If you get to the point where you feel like you have, or will push the envelope, you have likely already exceeded design limitations and should pull the plug."

Unfortunately there are many that will continue stretching their envelope, somehow manage to rationalize further investments and finally reach a point where blind faith overrules all logical and prudent thought processes.

We've seen it time and time again.

-All for 'love'... yeah right - but don't forget love doesn't pay the rent.

In the end, I respect those few that threw in the towel and simply said 'it's not for me'.

[Gator]

The many posters have given us a rather comprehensive list of traits and conditions that may prevent success.  My opinion is that a man could succeed with one of the traits/conditions on this long list. Using T/G’s example, there are women who would be happy in their doublewide.  However, the list is justifiable, and when a man has two … three….of these, he is chasing a near impossible dream. 

To the list I would add:
    -  men without confidence
    -  men seeking a maid and sex slave

RW are beautiful.  Other men too will think she is beautiful, and she will receive attention.   RW enjoy being noticed, yet few will actively encourage the attention.  Do you have the confidence to let her simply enjoy the attention?  Or will it make you jealous, so jealous that doubts creep in and you become controlling, doing everything other than make her wear a cow bell around her neck?   

Men seeking a maid – sex slave should go somewhere other than the FSU.  RW are mentally strong; for sure they are not submissive and compliant.  Most are well educated and see themselves serving some productive role.

[Michelangelo]

Sheesh I\O save some for the rest of us will ya!

I agree, Louie!

I/O.....another one for your list... Men who take turns :-)  LOL

[viking]

Gator

Could not agree more

[I/O]

Well it seems the vacation time thing raised the hackles of a few.  My reponse to that is simple.  Stop blowing hot air up each other's bums and get real.  How many guys here are now married and happy as a result of going through this process with only 2 or 3 weeks per year to devote exclusively to it?  Lets have the numbers and we can see how it cuts up.

Someone remarked or was obviously peeved because some of my comments bluntly excluded a few people.  Well how bad so sad.  Example: You can't shop high end if you havn't money so you are excluded.  That's life.  Some things exclude some of us. Live with it.

Another remarked that the list probably suggests that half of the people here should quit.  I wouldn't be surprised if that is exactly correct.  Love me or hate me for that remark, it's of no consequence to me.  Better still, prove me wrong.

This is a tough row to hoe and if you aint got the doe, there won't be a show.  Yes I am not poor, but I am sure as hell not rich either and I do happen to count my pennys so to say.  You'll find there will be a lot more penny's to count in this caper than you expect.  A lot more.  Which comes back to vacation time.  If you only have 2 or 3 weeks per year available and you can't afford and can't arrange time off without pay to bulk the available time up, you are going to struggle big time.

Feel good exceptions can of course make some "Feel good" but they are just that, exceptions and rarely produce a positive result.


I/O

[jb]

I/O,

I don't have your flair, but I like your style.  Your are seemingly on your way to be as thouroughly hated as I am around here.  I have never blown smoke up anybody's backside.

Oh, and BTW, during the 2 year dating phase of our courtship, let's see now,,, that would make it about 5 years married and 2 years as a couple equals a 7 years realtionship, not too bad for a mean old rattlesnake like me.  I expended my 6 weeks of annual leave in Russia, plus always used a couple of more weeks of unpaid leave for an extra trip.

And yes, I'm not rich either, but I'm not exactly poor either, I'm just a simply oil field engineer with expensive tastes in women and who knows how to count his coins wisely.

[BillyB]

Russian women aren't for men past their expiration date.

A buddy of mine, who's a nurse, that works for a company, that pays to test medicine on volunteers, said a guy who auditioned for American Idol is exactly the man he is on the show. The guy probably has had one too many test drugs but it's all for the benefit of mankind. Click here to see him in action.

[youtube=425,350]guphHAKmCVA[/youtube]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=guphHAKmCVA&mode=related&search=

[Turboguy]

How many guys here are now married and happy as a result of going through this process with only 2 or 3 weeks per year to devote exclusively to it?  Lets have the numbers and we can see how it cuts up.

I/O

My guess would be 80%

[I/O]

I/O,

I don't have your flair, but I like your style.  Your are seemingly on your way to be as thouroughly hated as I am around here.  I have never blown smoke up anybody's backside.

Oh, and BTW, during the 2 year dating phase of our courtship, let's see now,,, that would make it about 5 years married and 2 years as a couple equals a 7 years realtionship, not too bad for a mean old rattlesnake like me.  I expended my 6 weeks of annual leave in Russia, plus always used a couple of more weeks of unpaid leave for an extra trip.

And yes, I'm not rich either, but I'm not exactly poor either, I'm just a simply oil field engineer with expensive tastes in women and who knows how to count his coins wisely.

JB Love me or hate me I honestly don't give a hoot.  Call me anything you like with one exception.  Don't call me late for dinner.  I didn't particularly come here to get hated, but I have had a bit of practice.  I've been hated out of a few other forums because I refuse to cop the nonsense and I feel that anyone who is silly enough to write publically is duty bound to tell the truth.   By the same token, I don't particularly do this to make friends.  If I want more friends I join a club.

You know, one poor guy left my office the other day (I mentioned him in another thread) with a very long face and I have no doubt hating me at the time.  But the time will come when he thanks me for saving him an awful lot of wasted money and emotions because I told it to him the way it is.  He is a nice guy, but as I pointed out to him, nice guys don't always win the prize.

I live at the same address my father brought me up to live at.  Number 1 Reality street.  I don't always agree with everything he says, but I still ask his opinion, because I know I'll get it straighter than straight.  He comments, you don't have to listen to everything I say, but if the cap fits, have the brains to wear the so and so thing. Same applies to any of my comments here.  Take what you can use and toss the rest out, but if something is truth, don't toss it out simply because you don't like it.

T/G With all due respect, I am not actually interested in guesses, I am more interested in cold hard numbers.  One has already stated approximately 8 weeks per year in the initial stages.  Guessing is what a lot of people do and it doesn't work terribly well most times.

I/O

Sorry another of my so and so typos now corrected.

[BillyB]

BillyB With all due respect, I am not actually interested in guesses, I am more interested in cold hard numbers.  One has already stated approximately 8 weeks per year in the initial stages.  Guessing is what a lot of people do and it doesn't work terribly well most times.

I wasn't the one guessing, TG was.

[Turboguy]

Yes, guessing isn't very good.   Yesterday you guessed I said something the PG said,  Today Billy gets the rap for what I said.   Since a lot of the things said here are guesses, you are not coming out very good on the guessing department.

Frankly I think your guess that most put in 8 weeks a year is as good as your guesses about who posted.   Maybe we need a poll to give us a better idea.

[I/O]

Yes, guessing isn't very good.   Yesterday you guessed I said something the PG said,  Today Billy gets the rap for what I said.   Since a lot of the things said here are guesses, you are not coming out very good on the guessing department.

Frankly I think your guess that most put in 8 weeks a year is as good as your guesses about who posted.   Maybe we need a poll to give us a better idea.

T/G No I didn't guess about names, I made mistakes and had the b@lls to admit it and correct it.  Something I am beginning to notice is severely lacking amoungst some. 

By the way, please show me where I guessed most were puting in 8 weeks per year?  I quoted 1 who stated their case.  You would obviously be an exception(A word you seem to live on) because on available evidence you've put in the better part of several years.  Bit more than 2 or 3 weeks wouldn't you say and you still havn't gotten one home permanently yet?

Frankly you think?  Excellent, you seem to have started something new.  I wish you luck with it.

This thread was about unsuitable people for this pursuit and I happen to think those with small vacation time are unsuitable.  Some have reacted and gotten all hurt about that, but I simply say, prove otherwise.  I have never been afraid to change my view in the face of evidence, smart people do that, but show me the evidence rather than hurt feelings.

You know, Buyers are liars.  Salespeople stretch the truth a little but buyers often outright lie.  When did you hear someone say I can't afford that item. No, most often they say, I don't want to spend that much.  Same applies here, too many are suckered into this by people who have the buyer mentality. If you can't afford the time or don't have the resources, of course it's possible but it is highly unlikely and any freshman with an IQ of more than 47 will want to know the truth. 

I/O

[KenC]

Gator,

RW are beautiful.  Other men too will think she is beautiful, and she will receive attention.   RW enjoy being noticed, yet few will actively encourage the attention.  Do you have the confidence to let her simply enjoy the attention?  Or will it make you jealous, so jealous that doubts creep in and you become controlling, doing everything other than make her wear a cow bell around her neck

The guys here need to consider that even if they can lure a sexy hot RW to come here, are they man enough to keep her?  Look at the paranoid freak "Happiness" and his psycho jealous rages.  If the girl wasn't cheating, he drove her too it.  It kind of reminds me of that Cheryl Crowe song "Are you strong enough to be my man?"  The hotter the woman, the more confident the man better be or he is toast.

While we are on the subject of manly confidence, how about all these guys in touch with their feminine side?  That may play well on Dr. Phil's show, but I think a strong RW would wonder why she fell for such a p*ssy.

I know everytime we hear about a RW dumping her hubby, we automatically think "another green card beotch."  Well, I personally know two AM/RW couples here in San Diego where this happened and in both instances, the men were total scumbags.  These two professionals with great income living prestigious lives brought over a couple of sincere Russian hotties and treated them like dirt.  Both verbally abused their wives, one physically abused his and the other gave his wife crabs.  Some classy guys I wanna tel ya.  Of course if they were to post here, then Max would just come along and scoop them up into his self help/pity group.
KenC

O/I,
Right on brother!

[FSUrookie]

KenC;

Your views, opinions and advice, based on your actual experiences, seem to be on the money for the most part. I am in the process of nearing an engagement of a genuine Ukrainian hottie. She is educated, good looking, young, family-oriented, and even a virgin (wow), but i already know that it will take much strength financially, physically, and mentally to make it work, She IS a great woman, but she is looking for a great guy who is responsible, kind (she's not the aggressive type), and someone who is going to treat her with respect and dignity, and spend money on her for the ESSENTIAL stuff, not jewelry. But anyway, glad you and others are on this board, because it has helped to put my FSU experience in order and I am now better prepared for the REALITY of dating and hopefully marrying a great FSU woman from Ukraine. Unfortunately, many guys will never see these boards, and will think the whole FSU woman thing is like a fantasy come true. With hard work, some time and money, (a fit body helps too I have found), and a decent guy who is STRONG mentally and physically Can find a true gem unlike any American woman they have ever seen! The journey continues.....

[Bruno]

Well it seems the vacation time thing raised the hackles of a few.  My reponse to that is simple.  Stop blowing hot air up each other's bums and get real.  How many guys here are now married and happy as a result of going through this process with only 2 or 3 weeks per year to devote exclusively to it?  Lets have the numbers and we can see how it cuts up.

Simple gardener working for administration... only 6 week vacation time year and only 1250 euro month in my hand... seem that RW are not for me 

BUT... yes, there is a "but"... until now, "rules" listed up are true for USA and Australia... around 50% of the business dating in FSU is with European man and "rules" are very different for us...

First, FSU is near Europa... trip from Odessa to Bruxelles is short ( departure 16h00, arrival the same day at 19h00 ) ( Kiev and Moscow is more fast to reach )... it is cheap in airfare ( around 300 euro a round trip )...

Second, visit time... yes, i am limited to one month in FSU but once the initial contact make, the woman can visit you and see her potential living place... in any case, i recommend highly a visit of the FSU girls in your european country... in my actual case, the marriage visa was refused since she have never visit my place... in a other topic, Richard wrote that he find crazy that European ask girls to visit the guys country but it can become a needed thing for the marriage visa...

Money... yes, 1200 euro month can seem very little... but once my fixed expense pay ( hire of home, charge, insurrance, food,etc ), i remain with around 700 euro month... for my first marriage, i was with a income a little more high that 1000 euro... enough for me, a wife and a child... yearly holiday in Russia, private school for the child, total medical insurance for the 3 of us ( 100% pay back for everythink related to hospital, 80% pay back for doctor and drugs ), monthly week-end trip to other country, etc... Some expense like language course are non existing here, all pay by the gouverment... same thing for the professional formation...

So, all is wrote here is true... but only for guys who live at the other side of the world... for guys where the country don't allow the girls to visit on tourist visa... etc...

[catzenmouse]

Love me or hate me I honestly don't give a hoot.

- and -

I live at the same address my father brought me up to live at.  Number 1 Reality street.  I don't always agree with everything he says, but I still ask his opinion, because I know I'll get it straighter than straight.  He comments, you don't have to listen to everything I say, but if the cap fits, have the brains to wear the so and so thing. Same applies to any of my comments here.  Take what you can use and toss the rest out, but if something is truth, don't toss it out simply because you don't like it.

Exactly!

 How often here at RWD do we see a post with excellent information ripped apart because the responder doesn't like the original poster? Waaaaay too often IMO. And quite probably because the responder sees something in the post that hits a bit too close to home and they don't like what they see in the mirror there.

Dudes and dudettes: Get over your selves! There is so damn much good information here that will save you time, money, and a very long unhappy experience that if you discount it off hand and you get your panties all up in a bunch because of who said it then you are well on your way to being one of those guys who should bail out of this process once and for all.

This is not a Nursery School for Misfits Wanting a SmokinHotKova!

 This IS the very best resource available to you to learn how to do this, what you are up against, and how to be successful in the long run. Having a typing fingers hissy fit over a post on an internet discussion board truly shows much more about the poster than they realize and in the end they just may find out that all those things they discounted are rearing up to bite them in the @ss.

Ken

[jb]

Case in point would be ITDaddy who started the thread " New Guy needs help--RussianUkraine babes for real?".   He seemed to me to be a decent guy with his head screwed on pretty straight.  He stated he made $35-40K yearly, had a kid he was raising, didn't have the time to invest, and wanted to know if he had a shot, (or deserved a shot) at a RW/UW hottie.  He was given good information, swallowed the bitter pill like a man, and seemingly has pulled the plug.  Young, hot, and beautiful RWs are prolly not in his foreseeable future. 

I just wish a few others could be as honest with themselves as ITDaddy is.