Argument between my friend and me

[prince_alfie]

I was talking to my friend in New York City (who is now in Kiev) and he claimed that he will be married to her by October. Wow! That's a little too fast to do a K-1 visa isn't it? I expect it to take like longer at least not until next spring.

He claims that since his girlfriend works at the consulate that she will be able to get through the process faster. Is that true?

[Turboguy]

No, that is not unreasonable for someone living in NY.   The Vermont center is the fastest.  She probably could fast track it through the Ukrainain Embassy and Ukraine is typically about 3-4 weeks faster than Russia.   Groove got his visa in 4 months and his gal was from Russia.   I could see your friends wife being here in May or June. 

[prince_alfie]

No, that is not unreasonable for someone living in NY.   The Vermont center is the fastest.  She probably could fast track it through the Ukrainain Embassy and Ukraine is typically about 3-4 weeks faster than Russia.   Groove got his visa in 4 months and his gal was from Russia.   I could see your friends wife being here in May or June. 

Thanks, that's really interesting! I am sure to stand corrected then. I wonder why everyone makes the K-1 seem like a really long process. Or is that K-3 instead?

[Bruno]

No, that is not unreasonable...

A K1, a few hours after the start of his first visit... after the one week wonder, we have a new type of men : the one minute wonder...

Why so much hurry ? Can you ask him if he have already have a "french kiss" from his "bride"... where he have propose? Maybe at the arrival hall at the airport 

It is unreasonable!!!

[prince_alfie]

A K1, a few hours after the start of his first visit... after the one week wonder, we have a new type of men : the one minute wonder...

Why so much hurry ? Can you ask him if he have already have a "french kiss" from his "bride"... where he have propose? Maybe at the arrival hall at the airport 

It is unreasonable!!!

It's his first trip and my friend expects to have her in the bin on the first try. He doesn't want to do multiple visits because it's way too expensive and he thinks that since they share the same religion everything will be just dandy.

I am skeptical but my friend is rather stubborn. Yeah, he plans to bring her here on the K-1 asap.

[Turboguy]

The processing speed depends a lot on where you live in the country.  He is lucky with his location.  The Vermont center is the fastest sometimes processing applications as quickly as two weeks.   Mine crawed through in 5 weeks.  The holiday season and Gerald Ford dying would all be factors but I had to request an IMBRA waver also which may have slowed it down.   California is the slowest and can take 6 months. 

I hope he has fast processing speed but making the decison to do a K-1 too fast really ups the chances for problems.   He should take time to get to know her. 

[prince_alfie]

The processing speed depends a lot on where you live in the country.  He is lucky with his location.  The Vermont center is the fastest sometimes processing applications as quickly as two weeks.   Mine crawed through in 5 weeks.  The holiday season and Gerald Ford dying would all be factors but I had to request an IMBRA waver also which may have slowed it down.   California is the slowest and can take 6 months. 

I hope he has fast processing speed but making the decison to do a K-1 too fast really ups the chances for problems.   He should take time to get to know her. 

Yeah, but he feels like he already knows her after 10 months of phone / skype calls everyday with her and the occasional emails.

[catzenmouse]

The excuse of being the same religion so it will work fine is a new high in stupidity. Your friend is showing a complete lack of intelligence here and a total lack of respect for her in this thinking and rush to K-1.

He "feels" like he knows her? Get real. He has a pen pal who he has spoken with on the phone. As Bugs Bunny would say: "What a Maroooon! What an Ignoraaamus!"

We've got several Mormon's in the family and the religous similarity of the couple does not make the relationship have less problems. In some it causes more because of the regularly scheduled and specific "donation" amount to the church. I've seen first hand how this causes increased stress on the marriage as the couple will do without so the church can get theirs.

If this man is your friend the best thing you could do would be to smack him in the head and if this is "too expensive" for him he better start looking at home because he has no business whatsoever getting involved in an international relationship.

Ken

[prince_alfie]

The excuse of being the same religion so it will work fine is a new high in stupidity. Your friend is showing a complete lack of intelligence here and a total lack of respect for her in this thinking and rush to K-1.

He "feels" like he knows her? Get real. He has a pen pal who he has spoken with on the phone. As Bugs Bunny would say: "What a Maroooon! What an Ignoraaamus!"

We've got several Mormon's in the family and the religous similarity of the couple does not make the relationship have less problems. In some it causes more because of the regularly scheduled and specific "donation" amount to the church. I've seen first hand how this causes increased stress on the marriage as the couple will do without so the church can get theirs.

If this man is your friend the best thing you could do would be to smack him in the head and if this is "too expensive" for him he better start looking at home because he has no business whatsoever getting involved in an international relationship.

Ken

Actually he has already been engaged three times to American women and all of them failed. So he went the international route thinking that he would have a much better chance of winning this time the hand of a bride.

Still, $24000 from temp jobs in downtown Manhattan is going to be a hard life to tough things out...

[catzenmouse]

Actually he has already been engaged three times to American women and all of them failed. So he went the international route thinking that he would have a much better chance of winning this time the hand of a bride.

Still, $24000 from temp jobs in downtown Manhattan is going to be a hard life to tough things out...

What I see here, and of course this may all be way off base, is a very selfish man who could not make it at home and has now decided that "I'll just go get me one of them demure foreign women because she'll put up with my being dysfunctional."

He's going to ruin some poor girls life. Plain and simple. He's been a 3 time loser at home already. This is not the kind of person who should ever have considered a  foreign lady to begin with. I can only hope that he fails miserably with USCIS and gets turned down. It will save that poor girl a lifetime of drudgery and hardship.

Ken

[prince_alfie]

What I see here, and of course this may all be way off base, is a very selfish man who could not make it at home and has now decided that "I'll just go get me one of them demure foreign women because she'll put up with my being dysfunctional."

He's going to ruin some poor girls life. Plain and simple. He's been a 3 time loser at home already. This is not the kind of person who should ever have considered a  foreign lady to begin with. I can only hope that he fails miserably with USCIS and gets turned down. It will save that poor girl a lifetime of drudgery and hardship.

Ken

I have no idea but he does want to get married as soon as possible. I think that one of his ultimate goals is to reproduce and continue his family lineage.

[catzenmouse]

I have no idea but he does want to get married as soon as possible. I think that one of his ultimate goals is to reproduce and continue his family lineage.

And that just drives home the point that he is not fit to be in this process. This man is no better, and in reality probably much worse, than a sex tourist. At least they would leave the country and let the girl get back to her life. This guy is bound and determined to ruin her life. What a waste of space.

[Jumper]

i've never known anyone to be engaged three times and never marry!!

since he obviuosly wants to be married ,
that seems to indicate three women bailed after being engaged ..

all joking aside, he has more odds of being hit by lightning?
than for three women , who knew him well enough to accept engagement, to later bail before the alter,,


a pretty big flaw must be somewhere?


and since those women seemingly dint find out untill later..

when will this long distance ,yet fast tracked,  bride find out?


 

[prince_alfie]

i've never known anyone to be engaged three times and never marry!!

since he obviuosly wants to be married ,
that seems to indicate three women bailed after being engaged ..

all joking aside, he has more odds of being hit by lightning?
than for three women , who knew him well enough to accept engagement, to later bail before the alter,,


a pretty big flaw must be somewhere?


and since those women seemingly dint find out untill later..

when will this long distance ,yet fast tracked,  bride find out?


 

Yes, every time it was the girl who left the engagement. He does have a hot temper on occasion (once destroyed his Philly apartment and the cops rushed in) and he is extremely liberal (very much pro-abortion, pro-gay rights, etc. etc.) which doesn't seem to attract most LDS women in the US... extremely political guy by far...

Also has a fetish but won't mention any details about those...

What do people think about a guy who is interested in exploring the "feminine" side of self?

[catzenmouse]

1) I think you need to find a better class of "friends".

2) If you are any kind of a decent person (and you seem to have good intentions) you should tell this girl about this "friend" of yours. He has got some serious mental issues and to allow him to pile them on some unsuspecting girl is very cruel at least, and could end up being criminal at worst.

You've got a chance to stand up and do the right thing for someone who is innocent and has no way of knowing what kind of hell is waiting for her. Are you willing to do the right thing here Alfie?

[groovlstk]

What do people think about a guy who is interested in exploring the "feminine" side of self?

PA, if memory serves, YOU played matchmaker for your ladyboy pal so when things go to hell shortly after "his" GF's arrival in the US, you're going to share the blame. The strikes against him are legion: his poverty-level income and dim career prospects, complete lack of preparedness or even consideration for the future, recklessly impulsive decision to marry a stranger, reproductive goals that were last seen fashionable with Latin American dictators, and last but not least his GFs shock when she discovers she has to share her lingerie with him.

I can't believe someone who participates in this board and reads first-hand the monumental difficulties in establishing a relationship that can lead to marriage would be so cavalier and illogical in advising a friend who is, believe it or not, several degrees more clueless than his advisor.

[prince_alfie]

1) I think you need to find a better class of "friends".

2) If you are any kind of a decent person (and you seem to have good intentions) you should tell this girl about this "friend" of yours. He has got some serious mental issues and to allow him to pile them on some unsuspecting girl is very cruel at least, and could end up being criminal at worst.

You've got a chance to stand up and do the right thing for someone who is innocent and has no way of knowing what kind of hell is waiting for her. Are you willing to do the right thing here Alfie?

Yes, I tried to get in touch with her via e-mail but sadly, my friend has tried to block me at every single step. Apparently he seems to have more leverage on me. I am worried honestly but he turned off all contact to his mother and friends in the States during his trip to Kiev. I pray that everything will be fine.

I'm personally torn between being too intrusive and not helping enough. My friend is fairly strong-minded and in fact, on our business project he has been somewhat clamping down on the rest of the team members. Is there any way to get in touch with her not by e-mail or phone (which my friend can detect)?

[Turboguy]

So, since he has a hard time making ends meet on his $ 24,000 a year income in Manhatten he is expecting to feed a new wife, a baby and cover all the hospital and doctor costs that go with a new child.   I hope is bride wears the same sizes he does, at least they can share clothes.

Frankly I see him about to have his 4th fiancee without a marriage.   I am sure there must be some stupid women in the FSU but I have not met any that stupid.  If you can do anything to derail his plans you will be doing them both a favor.

[BillyB]

What do people think about a guy who is interested in exploring the "feminine" side of self?

Did your friend ask this question to his new fiancee? Did your friend tell his fiancee that he lives off hotdogs, and rooms with another guy? I'm assuming this is the same guy you talked about last time. The reality is, when she gets to America, she may be the 4th fiancee to leave him based on new discoveries of his lifestyle. If he doesn't change/improve into a suitable mate for marriage, he needs to lay the facts on the table so a woman understands what she's getting into.

[prince_alfie]

Did your friend ask this question to his new fiancee? Did your friend tell his fiancee that he lives off hotdogs, and rooms with another guy? I'm assuming this is the same guy you talked about last time. The reality is, when she gets to America, she may be the 4th fiancee to leave him based on new discoveries of his lifestyle. If he doesn't change/improve into a suitable mate for marriage, he needs to lay the facts on the table so a woman understands what she's getting into.

Indeed, however I was supposed to get in touch with him when he got to Kiev, but apparently I lost connection with both him and her while he is over there. In fact, they are practically unreachable. His cell message says to leave him an email instead! 

[I/O]

The greatest scam in this business is that our governments provide our SCUM with passports and other governments provide the very same SCUM with visas.

I/O

[viking]

There is stupidity. There is absurdity. This is....anyone have a barf bag?

[jb]

As an engineer, I've spent most of my adult life finding solutions to problems.  I can fix anything but the crack of dawn, and stupid.

There's just no cure for stupid...

[Bruno]

Still, $24000 from temp jobs in downtown Manhattan is going to be a hard life to tough things out...

I remember now, it is the hotdog man... these with not enough money for feed himself

I think that one of his ultimate goals is to reproduce and continue his family lineage.

  ... he can make a donation to a sperm bank... if they accept him

EDIT : When i think that US have create the IMBRA for protect foreign ladies... here, we have a real danger : no money, can be violent, share room with a guy and use women clothes ( no we know who is the women in the shared appartment ), he will marry without knowing the lady, he have not the security of a fixed full job... and who protect the foreign ladies against so guy... maybe he is now showing to these ladiy some photo montage where he stand before his virtual villa, with a virtual ship in his virtual swimming pool... maybe for the first time of his life, he have buy chick costum... maybe he spend one year income in a few day for impress the girl...

Seem that we have a future customer for the antidate galery !!!

[Bruno]

Yes, I tried to get in touch with her via e-mail but sadly, my friend has tried to block me at every single step...

Is there any way to get in touch with her not by e-mail or phone (which my friend can detect)?

Alfie, i have contact Kvinna... if she agree to help, she will contact you... give her all the contact information that you know ( already e-mail address and phone number )... but explain about the shared room, the lack of money, the travesti behaviour, etc...

Kvinna can speak or wrote in Russian... a language that these guy is certainly not able to understand and will maybe not block...

In so case, i believe that preventive attack is better that wait the "crash and burn"...